What Is Wisdom 2

WHAT IS WISDOM??? Hopstaken’s Newsletter – 2nd edition – December 2005

wise teachers???

This newsletter is published by Hopstaken Bedrijfsadvies, Amsterdam, The Netherlands (www.hopstaken.com). Intended publics are: my personal international network, including many former students at DDU, of both myself and Peter van Oosten. All correspondence: [email protected] Hopstaken’s Newsletter – 2nd edition – December 2005 ................................................................. 1 1. Welcome to the second edition of ‘What is Wisdom???’ ........................................................ 2 2. What do you know … .............................................................................................................. 3 3. What’s happening in The Netherlands ..................................................................................... 4 4. Martin’s favorite book on the power of values ........................................................................ 5 5. Meet Afshan ............................................................................................................................. 7 6. Cultural notes ......................................................................................................................... 10 7. On Manners – a few thoughts on what’s right and what’s wrong, when and where ............. 11 8. Wise quotes & -crackers ........................................................................................................ 12 9. News from across the planet .................................................................................................. 13 10. Demand & Supply – remember …......................................................................................... 16 11. Aging and the Art of “letting go” (part 1).............................................................................. 16 12. Our next issue ….................................................................................................................... 17 13. Recent NEWS ........................................................................................................................ 17 ATTACHMENT TO ‘WHAT IS WISDOM???.................................................................................... 18 Hopstaken Bedrijfsadvies – www.hopstaken.com

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1. Welcome to the second edition of ‘What is Wisdom???’ The right kind of feedback When you are busy-busy-busy, time just flies by. The final quarter of the year is to many, one of those periods that not just fly by, but speed by. Time to reflect, time to read a book, time to relax, time to chat – it’s limited, to say the least. Yet, somehow, when you’re very busy, you seem to be better at mastering time than when you’re not busy. In the summer, when in my type of business it’s quiet, I always find myself wasting time. Before summer, I plan to do a 1,000 things with all this time. After the summer, I only did 25. Summer makes me lazy. Yet, I love it. Both summer, and wasting time. Then Fall arrives. At first, I hate it. Every week I have about 2,500 things to do, and I complete 2,495. Still, I’m not tired, or stressed, or feeling worn out. In fact, I feel just fine, in good spirits. Even when nr. 2,501 comes along. There are even moments I feel absolutely great. Like yesterday, when 30+ students worked hard at improving their communication skills, while I jumped like a rabbit through the classroom from one question to another. Afterwards, at first, I felt like an old men who just had been working like a horse. Then a few students, red in their face, tell me “Oh teacher, I learned a lot today!” Let me tell you, my physical tiredness disappeared – like snow for the sun. I felt reborn. So what is wisdom? Very simple – like wisdom always is. When you accomplish something, and you get the right kind of feedback from the right person, on the right moment, then you feel GREAT – just like that. Teachers must be good at giving this kind of feedback to their students, and it’s wonderful when they get that feedback in return. It’s magic – first you spend energy, then you get it back. In an instant. Teaching, if it’s good teaching, is mutual inspiration for student and teacher. The ideal job? When you study business administration, you learn a lot about what’s wrong and right in the many areas of an organization. You read case studies, learn about business problems and their solutions. More important, you learn about the various processes that bring about solutions. And most important: you learn to cooperate and communicate. Well, that’s my personal opinion of course. Not surprisingly, some students get inspired to activate what they learn, in terms of practical business knowledge and communication skills, in a job that contains elements of both. Being a ‘business consultant’ then seems to be the ideal job. As a person who makes a living out of working as a business consultant, I tend to agree. But as with many ‘ideal jobs’, there are some barriers to take before you qualify. Lack of grey hair When they arrive in Europe, most students from Asian countries are very quiet, shy, and quite reluctant to communicate. “Any questions?” usually results in quietness. When they leave, many of them have improved communication skills: they initiate a talk or ask a question, feel freer to express an opinion, are less shy, can do a smooth presentation. The better your communication skills, the more you qualify for a career as a business consultant. However, there is one aspect that keeps entrepreneurs from hiring a business consultant: lack of grey hair. Not enough experience. Credibility is measured by the number of years and jobs and projects. I don’t fully agree with that point of view. It’s a fallacy to think that grey haired business consultants are better than young ones. However, it’s easy to understand. Suppose you are a 45-year old business owner. You have a problem. With your 20+ years of experience, you haven’t been able to handle this problem. Would you hire a 27 year-old business consultant who doesn’t have much more working experience than studying and running around the college grounds from one class to another? No, you probably wouldn’t. Yet, it’s a mistake. When I think back of exams by Nga Tran (Anna), He Xiaoman (Mandy), Liu Fan (Sarah), Wang Dongni (Gracie), Sinem, Shi Lei (Shelly), Xiao Yezheng (Johnson), Surendra Gurung (from Nepal) and Nazia Shaheen (from Pakistan) – just some examples – I have to confess that their wisdom and creativeness is so much more than can be expected from so-called ‘lack of experience’. I learned a lot from them. (Thanks again, if you’re reading this.) Specialize? ‘Business consultant’ is a term that encompasses a myriad of specializations. In my case, I specialized in three fields: communication, organization and personnel management (or ‘HRM’). However, don’t ask me anything about IT, logistics or legal matters. You can however ask my advice on the many practical aspects of communication, the design and maintenance of organizational structures and the handling of (sometimes) complex personnel affairs. Quite often I need to use knowledge from all three fields to help my clients, as these three fields are closely connected. Within each field there are specializations. Then there’s the personal talents you have: never choose a specialization you have little or no talent for, even if scarcity of it makes it financially very interesting. It helps if you have an easy going nature, tolerant of ill-mannered or plain-crazy people and able to stay calm in panicky situations. You need to have a good health and a broad interest in life in general. And age? You can compensate lack of grey hair. Not by shaving it off, like some guys do. To me they look a bit like gangsters – tough heads. No, you’ll get quite far if you become good at developing your communication skills, and willing to learn from each and every situation you encounter. Business consultants should be human learning machines, trying to understand everything, aware that that’s impossible, but careful enough not to be too fast in drawing conclusions, let alone making judgements. And beware of absolute judgements.

Hopstaken Bedrijfsadvies – www.hopstaken.com

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Hopstaken’s website (www.hopstaken.com) In the near future I’d like to upgrade my website. It dates from 2001, is quite boring, and mainly in Dutch. It should become a bi-lingual site, made more attractive, and the newsletter should contain pictures. Zhu Xinglian (Rage) suggested a notice board facility, like the one on an MSN Space. I like the idea. Then you will be able to enter your news, your request for help, your question, your feedback straight onto the site, and we’ll have something like a forum. DDU in the media Recently Dutch Delta University has been mentioned in some (Dutch) media. When a business is mentioned in the media, it’s usually because there is bad news. Or someone assumes there is bad news. Or there is a very small mistake, which is then blown up to a disproportianate size. Like one dissatisfied customer is much more interesting to the average news reporter than 999 satisfied customers. Or there is no bad news, and media just create it. Or someone is on a mission to destroy a good reputation, and then finds a reporter who is willing to cooperate. Well, you know how news media work, if you were in my PR class. This is entirely a DDU matter. DDU management is taking care of this, and I’m confident this will produce a satisfactory result. So I will not reflect on it this issue. Perhaps later, when the dust has settled, there will be a chance to do that. If you have any questions about the current state of affairs, I refer you to DDU. (See also This Issue’s Word, below)

2. What do you know … … and what not Mr. Andrew Lo, Economics Professor at the MIT (Massachusetts Institute of Technology), recently said: “We would like to have 3 Laws that explain 99% of economic behavior. Instead, we have 99 Laws that explain 3% of economic behavior.” In other words, economic scientists are not able to understand economy. Interesting! As a matter of fact, this confirms my personal experience with many so-called Laws in Management. They don’t survive the test of reality. Remember that many of those ‘Laws’ were defined by scientists who never worked inside a company, or as a manager. Professors who only talk with members of the Board of Directors. In other words, people who usually have lost touch with reality. That is: the reality of the shop floor. These professors are in love with theoretical concepts. But … only when they survive the only test: reality, they have value. That’s why I always test those laws. And why I’m always curious if the person who defined them has had any real life, or business, experience. There are exceptions. I’m still an admirer of John P. Kotter, the Harvard professor who wrote ‘Leading Change’, and later, ‘The Heart of Change’. As someone who wintessed, participated in and experienced change in companies many times, I can only state that his work is based on real observation. That he found many real – that is, universal, supra-cultural – truths on this subject, is evidenced by the many successful applications worldwide. An observation on freedom of choice Talking about observations: a few years ago two psychologists, Sheena Lyengar and Mark Lepper, conducted a remarkable research on freedom of choice. Customers of a grocery shop were offered 24 different types of jam on one day, on the other day just 6. The days they had a big choice, crowds of people came to the shop. The days they had a small choice, they sold ten times as much jam. This is contrary to what many a-marketeer would have predicted … it’s ‘against the law’! Job hunting successes A job hunting success means, getting a job that is a good start for a career, and where you can use the know-how you picked up in your European educational adventures. Zeng Qian (Tracy) recently found a job in The Netherlands. July 2005 graduates Chen Yan (Morgan), Zhen Lincheng (Apple), Liu Yan (Eileen) and Dai Jiaying (Wing) all found jobs in their home country. I assume there are more job hunting successes. Let us know about your career steps. How much money do you make when … This site (http://www.wageindicator.org/main) will help you find answers to this old question. Sofar, information on salaries for different types of jobs are available for 10 European countries, Brazil, South Afrca, India and the United States. I cannot vouch for the accuracy, but it can serve you as a guide in this highly sensitive area. This Issue’s Word: Calumniate (Verb) Pronunciation: [kê-‘lêm-nee-eyt] Definition 1: To make malicious statements known to be false in an effort to harm someone’s reputation or character. Usage 1: Our language can damage others in several ways: we may defame (to focus an attack on the victim’s reputation), malign (to attack someone’s character by speaking badly of him or her), or vilify (to grossly criticize someone to undermine their character and reputation). ‘Calumniate’ implies an attack on character or reputation that is knowingly incorrect. Benjamin Disraeli, a 19th-century British Prime Minister, said that there are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics. Calumniating falls under Disraeli’s second category. The noun is ‘calumny.’ Hopstaken Bedrijfsadvies – www.hopstaken.com

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Suggested usage: Unfortunately, we find this behavior on all levels: ‘After a period of scandal, politicians sometimes become more careful about calumniating their opponents.’ ‘Humans are basically sadistic; watch how toddlers calumniate their siblings, just to watch the spectacle of the punishment.’ Etymology: Latin calumnia ‘trickery, chicanery’ from calvor ‘to deceive.’ (source: www.yourdictionary.com) Dutch Cultural Evening: beyond orange November 10: a packed Deventer City Hall. DDU teachers and staff, with the help of several students, staged an evening where many aspects of Dutch culture were shown. Peter van Oosten masterminded and organized the event, and presented a wide (and wild) variety of Dutch cultural manifestations. From Dutch rock & roll to Dutch philosophers, from Dutch customs on the beach to a multicultural talk between two chicken from far eastern parentage. There was an interview with Nga Tran (Anna) from Ho Chi Minh City, about the differences between Dutch and Vietnamese cultures. Wendy & Marjan did a hilarious quiz, DDU staff sang the Dutch national anthem (un-rehearsed!) and in their usual crazy & improvized sketch Peter & Loek made sure the attendees understood the roots of a famous Dutch talent: Water Management. Their advice: teach Water Management at DDU … (Our good Prince of Orange, who is an expert in this area, was visiting Marocco at the moment, so he couldn’t come …) The picture shows Chinese, Nepalese, Vietnamese and Pakistani students tasting typical Dutch dishes. See http://spaces.msn.com/members/hopper1951 via MSN Messenger for more pictures of the event.

3. What’s happening in The Netherlands The Mauritshuis in The Hague When you live in the Netherlands, you might as well use the opportunity to visit some of those great museums we have. A very small but great one is the Mauritshuis in The Hague. When you have seen the movie ‘The Girl with the Pearl Earring’, you will want to see the genuine article. The name of the movie is also the name of a painting. It’s by Johannes Vermeer, a man who worked as a bartender in Delft, but had a side job as painter. Only 37 works of him are known. If you should own one and sell it, you and your family won’t have to work for at least 10 generations.

Liu Fan (Sarah) with the pearly girl At this moment the Mauritshuis features an exhibition of 70 paintings by the 17th century Dutch specialist in almost miniature interior scenes, Frans van Mieris. Pictures of Dutch love and family life – a long time ago. Michelangelo in Teylers Museum Until January 6 you can closely examine a large collection of drawings by Michelangelo Buonarotti, with Leonardo da Vinci the formost Italian artist from the Renaissance. Many drawings are studies for the famous ceiling of the Sistine Chapel in the Vatican, Rome. This exhibition not just shows the drawings from the museum collection, but also the ones from the British Museum (London) and the Ashmolean Museum (Oxford). The museum is Teylers Museum in Haarlem,

Hopstaken Bedrijfsadvies – www.hopstaken.com

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my favorite Dutch museum 1 . Unfortunately, both websites (www.teylersmuseum.nl & www.michelangelo.nl) are in Dutch. So just look at the pictures. If you are interested in Italian Renaissance art, go to Haarlem. It’s a nice town, a bit like Deventer – just larger. It’s my home town. In June 2004 Peter & I took the bachelor graduates there for an excursion to the great church.

The weather Just an excuse to show you a picture. During those cold & foggy days in November, when the national traffic jam record was broken, I noticed my old pals the ‘collar parakeets’, in the tree outside my office window. You see 10 of these 20 tropical birds waiting to be fed by my neighbour. Tropical? Of course, this is Holland. It’s misty, it’s cold, it’s wet. You must be out of your mind to come here, and settle. It’s a funny place, Holland. Like humans, we have birds from all over the world, and like humans, somehow they too survive our climate. You can spot these parakeets in Amsterdam (Vondelpark) and The Hague. They don’t sing. They just yell and make lots of noise. And they’re fantastic acrobats.

4. Martin’s favorite book on the power of values One of my favorite books is The Vital Corporation, written by Garry Jacobs and Robert Macfarlane. This book shows the reasons why a company is in the decline phase and losing energy. •

At top management level you can see in that case: doubt, confusion, skepticism, outdated policies, uncertainty, pessimism, lack of planning and rumors.

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At middle level management you can investigate: lack of freedom, lack of discipline, poor communication, undefined structure, in adequate systems and poor team work.

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At the employees level you can find out: lack of knowledge, negative attitude, lack of interest and lack of skills.

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When I was 15 or so years old, I used to go to Teylers Museum when I wanted to ‘hide’ from who or whatever made me unhappy. In those days perhaps 1 or 2 people a day came to visit Teylers Museum, which has an impressive collection of palaeonthological finds, antique machinery for physical experiments, a collection of 19th century paintings, a collection of antique coins, a huge library and (after the Rijksmuseum) the largest collection of prints and drawings to be found in The Netherlands. Among them, works by Rembrandt, and Michelangelo. Hopstaken Bedrijfsadvies – www.hopstaken.com

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As a company has weak values you can see that employees have no deeply felt sense of identity with the company’s vision and strategy. Instead many employees view the company as a place to work and their job as a way to make a living. For me it is clear that companies with weak values provide no or not so much strategy implementing assistance. Executives who don’t value managers or employees with initiative or new ideas dampen experimentation and efforts to improve the status quo… When a company is in the ascending curve you will note that values are well implemented in these companies when you see: • high energy, clear direction (strategy), good morale, pride, enthusiasm, teamwork, smoothly working systems, effective coordination, continuous investment in training, and real teamwork. Values motivate people to improve individual performance on their own jobs. The list below includes some of the most important corporate values, but it is not exhaustive. These values are divided into three categories, according to the primary type of energy which the value generates when it is implemented. Implementing values in the first list releases greater physical energy. Work becomes brisk and precise. It proceeds on schedule without interruption. Implementing values in the second list upgrades the functioning of the organization. People, departments and activities function more smoothly and interact more harmoniously. The organization becomes alive and dynamic, responsive and adaptable. There is a sense of competence and momentum. The psychological values release the emotional and mental energies of people in the company, customers, vendors and even the general public. These values make work exciting and rewarding. They generate pride and dedication. They motivate employees to go the extra mile to serve and please the customer.

Physical Organizational Psychological Cleanliness Discipline Pleasing the customer Orderliness Accountability Respect for the individual Punctuality Standardization Innovation Regularity Systemization Decisiveness Safety Authority Growth of the individual Efficient use of money & materials Coordination of departments Loyalty Quality of product Integration of levels Service to society Quality of service Communication Integrity Maximum utilization of time Cooperation (teamwork) Creativity Optimum utilization of space Freedom Maintenance of equipment Successful plans incorporate not only quantitative targets, but qualitative goals as well, i.e. corporate values. Using values to elevate performance is essential for high productivity and maximum profitability. I found out that values at the physical level are important for people at the employee level, the organizational level is most important for middle managers and the psychological level for top management. When you are now at the physical level and you want to be a CEO in the future do the following. Give yourself a mark between 1-10 for each physical value. When the end result is an average of 8 or better you are in a position to become a middle manager in the near future and so on. Understand every person has a capacity to improve him or herself. It is up to each individual to choose. If you wish you can download this interesting book for free (see http://www.mirainternational.com/books/corporation/index.htm). Good luck, I wish you all the best! Martin J.C. Zuurhout MBA, Lecturer marketing and strategy DDU Hopstaken Bedrijfsadvies – www.hopstaken.com

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5. Meet Afshan Peter: As an introduction, please, tell us who you are, where you are from, and what you have been up to so far, concerning studies, diplomas, business, private life. Afshan: Well, my name is Gul Afshan. I come from Karachi, Pakistan. I have done M.A. Economics at Karachi University and I have completed my Bachelor’s of International Business Administration at the Dutch Delta University in Deventer, The Netherlands, on 08 July 2003. (Before it was called: DDBS; Dutch Delta Business School) The first 3 months were very difficult for me, to understand the environment, teaching style, weather, culture, but thereafter I understood - with cooperation of my Auntie’s family in Amsterdam, together with all of the administration and teaching staff, who were really co-operative. I also improve my English and learned some Dutch, too, with helpful teachers. I learned how to set up an own business, I improved my business skills and worked on the international relationships. After completing my studies from DDU, I returned to my hometown and –country, Karachi in Pakistan. Now, after a long struggle, I am running my own business in Pakistan as an educational consultant. Peter: How long and when have you been in the Netherlands? Where did you live and study, etc.? Afshan: I was in the Netherlands from 23-11-2001 to 30-08-2003. I lived in Amsterdam with my Aunt’s family. I was a regular student and I traveled to DDU from Amsterdam and back by train. Peter Regarding your study at DDU; could you tell us what was different from your earlier experiences; what was so special about it and what did you like best/didn’t like at all? Afshan: Well, firstly I would like to say that I thought it would be very difficult for me to understand everything that was new for me; this was my first trip in my whole life to visit Europe, there was a totally different life. But Dutch people are very co-operative. All teachers’ teaching style really was very good and impressing. Teachers’ and students’ behavior / relationship were really nice/ very friendly; sometimes I thought: “are we playing or practicing?” to introduce a product or discussing the chapters in class, but that was my learning time too. It felt very comfortable, when, if I have some problem to understand the subjects or any other educational item, the teacher especially gave me some extra time and attention and helped me to understand / solve the problems. Here I would like to tell their names, especially Mr. Plevier, Mr. Peter van Oosten, Mr. Paul Scholey and Mr. O’Connor. Well, what I didn’t like there was the expensive life, the high standard of living and the difficulties to get a good job. But I managed, even with those difficulties. Peter: Afshan, of course, you already had your Auntie living here; she and her family probably have told you about The Netherlands, before you even came here. Could you tell us something about your expectations then, concerning your stay for study-reasons in The Netherlands? Afshan: Yes sure! Before coming in the Netherlands, I had many expectations in my mind. My aunty guided me on the telephone and when she had visited Pakistan, before my visa process, she told me that in the Netherlands the weather is very cold, and that life in NL is very tough; that Dutch people – on the other hand - are very cooperative, and that study methods also are totally different from Pakistan’s. “It really is a challenge for you to pass the graduation! Especially difficult is the Dutch language; you may speak in English, but if you don’t know anything about Dutch, you might get some problems”. In that time I was very confused, but, after getting the visa, I changed my mind and decided to build up myself and complete my higher study, and that it would be my golden time to achieve a bright future; that during my study, I would do hard work and I should graduate from DDU!. I trust in God and of course God helped me, and hopefully I have done it now. During study I faced many problems to understand the educational system and it was very challengeable for me to regularly travel by train, in the early morning at 06:40 am from Amsterdam to Deventer, and, after finishing classes, to return after 5:00 pm. But I survived, because I wanted to complete my study and I had decided that I would do it. All teachers were supporting me very well, and I built great relationships with them and with the administrative staff, and – of course - also with the classmates. These students came from China, Vietnam, Germany, Turkey and Russia. They were all very helpful, helping each other with assignments and graduation reports. There was one big problem, though: to understand pronunciation. Actually, I was the only one girl, who came from Pakistan in DDU; in my thoughts I was representing Pakistan. In the Ramadan-period, I kept fasts, and with pride I celebrated my ‘Eid (ul Fitr, the end of Ramadan) and the Pakistan Independence Day, to let everyone know. All my expectations really were going positive and imagination was going higher: I would make my future very bright with European degree and now all my expectations are coming true/succeed. Hopstaken Bedrijfsadvies – www.hopstaken.com

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Peter: To what degree did the reality of living and studying in The Netherlands meet your expectations? Afshan: The studying level was totally different from my expectation and former experiences. But, I really improved my self-confidence and my communication skills. Most important, especially the presentations (Oh God!!!!) were really very difficult, but with your help now I improved, and through BBA studies, the ability to work independently and to work with or before groups has also improved. I always hoped I could meet this expectation. And, like I already said, with everybody’s cooperation it became true. Peter: Now you’re back in your home country, Pakistan, for some time already…Can you tell us some experiences, regarding “being back”? Afshan: Yes! I came back in my home country, Pakistan in 30/08/2003. I was feeling very excited to meet with my family, because it was the first time I had been so far away from my home for such a long time. Well, after ¾ months, I tried to get a good job in a bank, but in that time I faced many problems to get a job. Although, I had completed BBA, they ware demanding MBA. I began to think that I would have to go back to do MBA and may be after that I could find a good job. But MBA was very expensive for me. Thereafter I contacted DDU and sent the school my offer: I would like to work with you as an educational consultant. Mr. Deelstra (DDU president) and Mr. Plevier (educational director) were so nice to support me and my business was born! Everything was “first time” for me, and it gave me happiness, but I also faced many problems. Invited by me, Mr. Deelstra visited Pakistan and he was very happy to be there for the first time in his life. I arranged seminars about studying at DDU in Karachi, Islamabad, and Lahore. These seminars were 100 % successful. Candidate students and their parents were very excited. Shortly after those seminars I succeeded in my work with DDU support. For the first time in Pakistan, 18 students from Karachi, 6 from Islamabad, and 7 from Lahore got the visa from the Netherlands embassy. Also I have very good/true business relationship with the embassy because of my 100 % legal work. Peter: What did you miss most from your home - country, being in The Netherlands and what do you miss most from The Netherlands, being back in your home-country? And maybe: did you have difficulties with getting back into the “old culture” (the Pakistan way of life)? Afshan: When I was in Holland, my only sister and 2 brothers have got married. It was in my exam period, so I could not attend their marriage, and - with some family matters - marriage dates cannot be changed, therefore the marriage ceremonies took place without me. In that time I was very upset about it and feeling bad. I was really missing my family. You may be able to understand the situation of my mind and the feeling in my heart better, when you would know, that - after my beloved and great father’s death (he passed away 2 Nov, 1992) - this was the first moment of happiness in my family and now I couldn’t attend! I have no words to explain how sad I was. Well, it’s part of human nature, that we miss what is not in our hand and with us, and that we know the value of that. After getting back from the Netherlands I was missing all my teachers and my study time period, really I miss those till now. Also, I would like to express, that in Pakistan was “Old Culture”, but now everything is going to change; very slowly, though, while at the same time the mentality of our population becomes better, through positive thinking, so not problem at all. Now families’ thoughts about girls’ higher studies are becoming very positive for and people are really willing to understand and to cooperate, but somewhere we feel troubles. To my opinion some strictness from the culture side gave us great life with success. Well, in the future everything will be fine. Peter: You’re in close contact with DDU, being an agent for this school in your region of the world. Mr. Deelstra has been your special guest, not so long ago… How do you experience this special relationship with the institution, where you’ve finished your business studies, and with its staff? Afshan: Yes! It’s my pleasure that I am representing my great University, which is DUTCH DELTA UNIVERSITY in Karachi, Lahore and Islamabad, Pakistan. Here I would like to tell you, that I was the first to introduce DDU in Pakistan. That first time as representative of DDU was my great experience and very challengeable for me. With Mr. Deelstra, who has been visiting Pakistan 2 times now, and with the staff’s, Ms. Esther, Ms. Rebecca, Ms. Erna and Ms. Karin, cooperation & support, I am running my business very well. I appreciate all of them and say “thank you very much for everything!” DDU and I now are achieving success, after having faced some very tough times and problems, ups & downs.

Hopstaken Bedrijfsadvies – www.hopstaken.com

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Peter: Your agency lately has been quite successful in providing DDU new students. I’m so curious now: what are you telling these new-to-be students about The Netherlands, the life, living and possible problems here, the study at DDU and about their future possibilities? Afshan: Yes!!!! You are right. But, I tell those students - before they register - about the problems (jobs/high standard of living and communication/ Dutch language). I tell them about my experiences, too. But I also tell them the solutions to those problems: the all cooperative teachers, the very helpful staff, and the great system of professional learning, which they will all see in reality. I tell them: “You will improve your knowledge to a higher level, especially the skills of presentation; you will improve your ability to work independently and in a group. You will learn about and experience Culture Shock too, which is very important for international business/jobs/work, etc…. Also, the ability to live independently and to adjust to high standard of living. When you will come back after completion of such higher professional studies and join any multinational company, international marketing field, government agency or start your own business, then you will be 100 % successful in the future and you will stand in your foot/feet.” After that, when students and their parents agree, they start the process for application. Peter: Which, my dear Afshan, are the main differences between Pakistani students and – let’s say: - Chinese students, to your opinion? Afshan: First of all: both have good relationship to each other as Asians. Between Pakistani students and Chinese students the main differences are pronunciation & communication, but both are very cooperative, friendly and willing to understand the problems and to accept the challenges. But somehow, Chinese students increasingly account for the largest number of temporary migrants for many destination countries, unlike Pakistani students. Strange is that Pakistani students face the highest refusal rate at 69 %, followed by students from China with 42 %. Anyway, I just want to say that both Pakistani and Chinese students want to go a good university to get a high education - that's the main point. Peter: The big earthquakes in your country took place not so long after the arrival of these new students. Did your agency have any concern with the situation of students, who were somehow affected by these disasters? Could you tell us something about it? Afshan: Yes, It was really a bad time. Earthquakes happen more often in Pakistan, but 08-10-2005 certainly was a poignant day for all Pakistani. In the 58 years of the country's existence it is no doubt a stunning disaster. The earthquake measured 7.6 on the open ended Richter scale and its epicenter laid 100 kilometers north of Islamabad. The first tremor rumbled through the country at around 8:55, followed by another one after a few minutes. I assume that the television in your country covered the news extensively and that you have seen what has happened with houses, buildings, cities, infrastructure and: people.I felt it to be my duty as a human being to help; I couldn’t stop myself. So my family and I worked as volunteers in a camp. I contacted all our students’ family and others. Our agency is still supporting them and we’re doing what we can do. I was really sad about the situation, but mostly about the children… I cannot explain my feelings in words. We’re just saying that it’s a test for us from God. We will have to survive. It is impossible to work towards happiness as a personal goal. They, whose goal in life is the happiness of other people, attain happiness. But how can I feel happy, when thousands of earthquake-stricken people are starving and going about without a warm shelter? It’s really a very hard time for us. But we will be patient and pray to God and we all will help the people in need and, if we have no money, we still have hands to do something with and a tongue to pray for all of them, and so we do. Peter: Afshan, I know that you really would like to come back to The Netherlands, to stay… You don’t have to tell (all) your reasons here in this newsletter, but I would like to know from you: which expectations do you have about your (possible) future life here? Afshan: Well, about my future life: I really have to come back to the Netherlands and I would like to work as a representative of DDU. I also want to study MBA; I think I would like that study very much and I am sure that this will make my future very bright and support me to get a very good job at international level and/or to run my own business. Another thought of mine is, that I believe to have been a good student, with a good record; not really established yet, but I will manage and survive, if Dutch government gives me the chance to immigrate. Peter: Thank you, Afshan, for your friendship and your cooperation! Afshan: I am very grateful to you, that you gave me this chance to say some in my words. Peter: May your wishes come true! Afshan: I hope so (Insha Allah). And I wish the same to you and to all readers. In the end, last but not least: Hopstaken Bedrijfsadvies – www.hopstaken.com

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Vrolijk Kerstfeest en een Gelukkig Nieuwjaar! “Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year and may all your wishes come true, I wish you and your family the best, good health, good friends and a lot of good luck... well, just everything, that will make you happy!” 6. Cultural notes Ella Fitzgerald In 1976 I have missed a chance to meet one of the most brilliant singers of all time. I was in Los Angeles at the time, and focused on other things. 22 years later Ella Fitzgerald died, at 78. She left a body of work which will be missed. I won’t get into her biography; it would take too much space. See www.ellafitzgerald.com. When she auditioned, the record people didn’t like her looks. They soon found out Ella had a golden voice, but also a warm personality. She was an unforgettable jazz singer, loved by anyone who likes singing. Her legacy will be with us forever, thanks to the many recordings she made. The picture below shows her in her prime, the guy looking at her with admiration is another jazz legend – trumpet player Dizzy Gillespie. I invite you to learn more about Ella. I first really learnt to know her art through her recordings. Although she started in the 1930ies, she became an international star 20 years later. Now, words are often useless – also, where music is concerned. When you want to get to know Ella, you’ll find out there are 100’s of CD’s. So let me point out some of her best recordings: CD Pure Ella: The Very Best of Ella Fitzgerald (following her career) CD Pure Ella: just Ella & piano CD The Complete Ella in Berlin (with ‘Mack the Knife’) CD Ella in Hollywood (with ‘Mr. Paganini’) DVD Something To Live For – great documentary, lots of music

Joni Mitchell Just one of those things. They happen, and you never forget them as they felt like magic-at-work. In the summer of 1973 I spent a week at Zane’s farm on Vancouver Island. It was paradise, believe me. Three years later I was back in the area, and although we hadn’t really been in touch, I decided to pay him a surprise visit. The road to get there was a long one. I travelled one whole day by boat and bus, and had to walk the last 3 kilometers. I still knew the way, but it was getting dark. When I arrived, there was a surprise indeed. No farm – just some concrete foundations were left. (And no Zane. It would be another 25 years before we met again …) Where once I had learned to ride a horse, bare back, there was a concrete building, bathing in bleak white lights: a supermarket of a non-descript design. It was then that a song jumped to my mind, that I had known for years, loved the melody, but was never really touched by its lyrics. The song is ‘Big

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Yellow Taxi’, and the singer Joni Mitchell 2 . Joni wrote many classic songs. Check out ‘Clouds’, with the heart breaking ‘Both Sides Now’. Like ‘Taxi’, guaranteed to bring tears to my (your?) eyes. A free tour around the world’s major heritage places One of those amazing websites you can visit if you need a break, is http://www.world-heritage-tour.org/map.html. It has over 750 panographies (panography: a 360° picture). The introduction states: “The WHTour is creating a documentary and educational image bank of printable panographies and online virtual tours for all sites registered as World Heritage by the UNESCO (United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization). All panographies are shooted, assembled and uploaded exclusively on this website by Tito Dupret, a 34 year-old multimedia director from Belgium and Bijuan Chen, his 26 year-old wife and multimedia assistant from China. So far, they have covered Afghanistan, Bangladesh, Eastern Canada, China, Cambodia, Egypt, India, Indonesia, Iran, Kazakhstan, Korea, Laos, Malaysia, Nepal, Pakistan, Sri Lanka, Thailand, Turkmenistan, The Philippines, Uzbekistan and Vietnam. This represents 16 % of all 812 WH sites: 131 sites with 750+ panographies. This project is slowly growing since July 2001 and will need years to complete. The WHTour is alive thanks to the J.M.Kaplan Fund, the World Monuments Fund and donators.”

7. On Manners – a few thoughts on what’s right and what’s wrong, when and where Intercultural communication – a fascinating, but also crucial subject. At the end of the last classes, I asked the students to name the major good and bad manners in their cultures. Good manners: keeping agreements, respect, politeness, being honest, being on time for meetings, accepting responsibility, participating in/contributing to a good cause, apologize after a mistake, speaking the truth, and showing hospitality to strangers. Bad manners: the opposites, so: breaking agreements, disrespect, being impolite, being late, denying responsbility, not participating in/ contributing to a good cause, no apologies after a mistake, lying, and inhospitability. Those were the opinions all cultures present had in common. So that’s wonderful, isn’t it? BUT … remember the expression: ‘there is a snake in the grass’? The subject of manners falls under the heading of ‘ethics and morals’. One attempt to make ethics and morals more practical, was to use new terms: moral standards, and values. What are manners? You could say, as a whole they form a set of moral standards by which we measure what is acceptable behaviour, and what is not. However, if Chinese, Nepali, Pakistani, Vietnamese, Turkish, Thai, Cameroon, Tanzanian and Dutch cultures fully agree about good and bad manners, how come we experience differences? The answer lies in the word ‘values’. How valuable, or how important, is a certain moral standard? And when is that so, and where? When I asked a Nepali student, why Nepali have a tendency to be late for meetings, he said: “It’s not so important to us.” “So what’s important?” ”That you’re there!” “I see. But if someone’s late, he’s not there. How do you cope with that?” “If he’s late, we assume he has an excuse. In my country, the distances are often far, and conditions of nature can be such that it’s very hard to be on time. So when our guest arrives, we’re just glad he’s there.” So, a moral standard depends for its effectiveness on its value. Obviously, being on time is nice, but not necessary when you are a Nepali. There is a problem when cultures meet, and the same moral standard has a different value. Then cultures may clash. Interestingly, international business is slowly developing international moral standards. In the beginning, these were dictated by the economically strongest. Like the Dutch in 17th – early 20th century East Indies, now Indonesia. And the Americans in many parts of the world, after World War II. Now, as you are aware, times change. I love it when seeing how the Chinese are now refusing to adapt to US standards. They used to behave subassertively (showing a subservient attitude, like Japanese still do 3 ), but now, they have become assertive. That’s an important sign of progress. They just have to be careful not to get trapped in this silly yet stupidly dangerous game of ‘my moral standard is supreme to yours’. That’s when assertiveness changes into aggressiveness. There is only one way to make communication work, and that is to treat each other as equals. Then there’s the aspect of place, and time. There’s the story about my uncle Harry. In the winter of ’44, when the Nazis had been occupying our country for almost 5 years and famine had struck Holland, he didn’t know how to feed his family. The Nazi soldiers however, were not starving. Their barracks were around the corner. So uncle Harry went out one winter night, and stole a bread. He got away with it. This helped his family to survive these bitter times. You wouldn’t think anyone would blame uncle Harry for what he’d done. Well, some people did. After the war, they spread 2

If you download this song, make sure it’s by Joni Mitchell herself, or the more theatrical but strong 2002 version by rock band Counting Crows. The lyrics you find at the end of this newsletter.

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There may be a difference between attitude and action. Not all sub-assertive people are subservient. Many are known to hide aggressiveness, and this may come out when provoked. Wolves, in sheep’s clothing. Hopstaken Bedrijfsadvies – www.hopstaken.com 11

the gossip that he was a burglar, and they would add, “once a burglar, always a burglar”. What more can I say? That uncle Harry in my eyes was a family hero? My advice: make sure you set the rules for international / intercultural meetings, not only by agreeing on the standards, but also on the values each party is attributing to the standards. If there is a disagreement on the values, then negotiate a new value – and stick to that. But in any event, do consider time and place. These may change the rules, and their value. I guess this process of negotiating rules and values must be done over and over again before we will get to some workable international manners. The United Nations are making a serious attempt, and they have been attempting for over half a century. But it’s you and I abd our direct friends and colleagues who have to make peace happen. In business, politics, religion and also, in tourism, we all share a responsibility. And as you know, both business and tourism can only flourish when there is peace 4 . And certainly, when we learn more about lessening damage done by natural disasters.

Cultural exchanges: Loek delivering a speech at Dokuz Eylul University, Izmir; Muhammed & Aaron dancing with the Dutch in Deventer; Chen Yan (Morgan) showing her Dutch poffertjes in Zhengzhou And of course, talking about getting to know each other’s cultures and manners is not enough. Fortunately, there will always be cooking, teaching, dancing, sports and people falling in love. 8.

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Wise quotes & -crackers

I have some second thoughts about politics and religion, but let’s stay out of that subject for now. Hopstaken Bedrijfsadvies – www.hopstaken.com

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Ceiling of room 102 on November 19, 2005. A highly original cheat note. “If we cannot end our differences, at least we can make the world safe for diversity.” John F. Kennedy (1917-1963, 35th American President) “The human heart, at whatever age, opens only to the heart that opens in return.” Maria Edgeworth (1767-1849, British writer) “The little reed, bending to the force of the wind, soon stood upright again when the storm had passed over.” Aesop (620-560 BC, Greek fabulist) “The person born with a talent they are meant to use will find their greatest happiness in using it.” Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe (1749-1832, German poet, dramatist, novelist) “The biggest mistake people make in life is not making a living at doing what they most enjoy.” Malcolm Forbes (founder of Forbes Magazine) “If you make friends with yourself you will never be alone.” Maxwell Maltz (1944-, Canadian author of ‘Psycho-Cybernetics’) “You have to find something that you love enough to be able to take risks, jump over the hurdles and break though the brick walls that are always going to be placed in front of you. If you don’t have that kind of feeling for what it is you are doing, you’ll stop at the first giant hurdle.” George Lucas (1945-, American film maker) “A single event can awaken within us a stranger totally unknown to us.” Antoine De Saint-Exupery (1900-1944, French aviator, writer)

Not my kind of cat

A Very Stupid Cat

My kind of cat

“Words are useless. Sometimes words are not the right way to express our feelings. Then, looking at someone, or an embrace, tells a complete story. Talking would only spoil the moment.” Liu Fan (Sarah)

9. News from across the planet Personal notes Nov. 18: Peter Wang completed his MBA at DDU after a brilliant presentation. Nov. 22: Meng Ying (Christina) left The Netherlands, after successfully completing her agricultural studies in Wageningen.

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Left: Peter Wang during his final (and brilliant) presentation Right: Meng Ying a few days before her farewell Photos: Peter van Oosten

Keep our network up-to-date! This is a very exclusive newsletter. Only around 70 people around the planet receive it, 50 or so in Asia, the rest in Europe, North America and Africa. A network offers the opportunity to communicate with many. Via one person, you might get in contact with several others. Most people who are active in business and have been for a number of years, have an active network of 100-120 people. This network contains colleagues, friends (close friends, ‘hobby’ friends, sports friends), family, former colleagues, and of course business associates. In the past few months, I have been able to connect several members of this network who happen to live in the same city but didn’t know it. You never know if you can mean something to each other in the future. To make a network work, the facts need to be up-to-date. So inform me about a change of email address, and city you live and work. And if there is anything wrong (for example, in the birthday dates below), email me straight away: [email protected]. Birthdays We thought it would be nice to mention whose birthday is coming soon. Then, we found out that we missed a lot of birthdays since the previous newsletter. In the Netherlands, when you forget someone’s birthday, you have a whole year to congratulate. So here are birthdays of recipients of this newsletter, since its first edition – October 15. If you forgot about them, make up for this and send your congratulations! Past Birthdays (October 15 – December 20) Nguyen Ngoc Linh October 18 Jules Plevier October 22 Zhou Lincheng (Apple) October 24 Dai Jiaying (Wing) October 25 Wang Dongni (Gracie) November 3 Ling Jing (Kate) November 16 Nguyen Nhat Anh (Oliver) November 19 Chen Yan (Morgan) November 20 Lin Danqin (Mariah/Fiona) November 26 E Xiaoman (Mandy) November 29 Liu Fan (Sarah) December 1 Peter Waite December 15 Song Yi (Harry) December 17 Coming Birthdays (December 20 – March 15) Guan Rui (Phebe) January 18 Nga Tran Thi Huyen (Anna) February 2 Nguyen Thi Hai Ha (Jenny) February 8 Lale Ustuner February 10 Zhang Xi (Cici) February 11 Tran Duc Cuong (ChoCho) February 25 Luo Man (Romana) March 5 Zhu Xinglian (Rage) March 8 He Xiaokai (Jamie) March 9 Wang Hailong (Peter) March 14

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Please notify if any date is incorrect. Within the next few months, I’ll assemble a list of all recipients, with name, nickname (if any), birthday, country, present location, study (topic) or job (position) and current email address. I have most data. Still, it would be helpful if you mail me the name of your study topic, or the title of your job. Also, let me know if you mind every recipient of What is Wisdom??? to know more about you than your name and birthday. Weddings! After Tung’s wedding (see first edition), two more weddings have taken place in Vietnam. Nguyen Ngoc Linh and Tran Tho Mai Van – July 2004 MBA Graduates – married each other, and Do Thi Hong Linh (Cherry) – July 2005 BBA Graduate – on November 27 married Bui Duc Manh (a.k.a. Harry: he videoed the Vietnamese Cultural Evening and the 2005 July Graduation Ceremony). Cherry & Harry sent us the following message, and many beautiful pictures (of which we only selected one): “It was quite a memorable day. Our wedding was organized in Hanoi (Cherry’s home) and Thaibinh (Harry’s home) and took 3 days. The most important thing we had to do was to welcome the guests to our wedding party, and then say thanks to them when they left. People came, said the words of congratulation to us and had a party with us. Many of our friends who came back to Vietnam from study in The Netherlands also came and they must never forget the music in the party. We played several songs from The Netherlands, such as: “Heb Ik Jou Niet Eens Gekust”; “Jij Bent Een Wonder”; “Ik wil met je dansen heel de nacht”; “Heb je Even Voor Mij”; “Hallo ik hou van jou” It is very funny that we don’t know the meaning of those songs but the music is very nice for the party. And also Dutch music makes us remember The Netherlands where our love was born and has grown up.”

Ben & Nancy have a child! Wang Xu Hui (Ben) and Zhang Ying (Nancy) – July 2004 MBA Graduates – had their baby boy November 16, in Shanghai. One day later, I had a great chat with both, as they honored me with the great news. Benchmarks from Hanoi & Shanghai: Xu Hui (Ben), Linh, Van & Ying (Nancy) in the Amsterdam Vondelpark, August 2004

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10. Demand & Supply – remember … Business is ‘communication with lots of content’, a good way to promote intercultural communication and of course, what many of you came to the Netherlands for to study – to gain knowledge and develop skills, and the put all that to use. Making money – sure. In the 21st century the way to do this is on a basis of equality, fair trade. In the process, establishing true bonds between business partners from different cultures will in time lead to peace. In a novel I read: “Nothing in the world is as profitable as peace.” This statement finally convinced the warmaking parties – only interested in their OWN profit, but nearly bankrupt in the process of waging war on their opponents – to make peace.

If you are looking for a demand or have anything to supply, use this platform as a market place. Send the specifics of your demand or supply to [email protected]. 11. Aging and the Art of “letting go” (part 1) Short days, long nights; that’s how the situation is in The Netherlands right now. December 21: winter! Sometimes I even hesitate to open up the curtains of my house in the morning, because the light inside is much more appealing to me than the darkness outside. Although: darkness… Our neighbors in the back are the “enlightened” kind of people, and it seems, that every year their outdoor collection of illuminated Christmas-decorations becomes more abundant. At least it saves us the trouble (of a higher energybill and) of having a security-lamp burning outside! Talking about “collections” and “collecting”… I know – from experience – that these form a very addictive aspect of our human nature. I’m still not free of it, although many items of my past collections have left my/our house, since we decided to move to our present residence. Sometimes “forces from outside” have to help us a bit to be able of taking decisions, like “saying goodbye” and “letting go”. In regard to my own collections, it happened to be a combination of “lack of space”, “not enough emotions left for/in it” and also “bad storage over the years”, the reason why many of those items were not really worth bearing the title of “collectible” any more. My dear friend Loek is a true collector (of music, of course!), because he has stocked his collection rather neatly, tidily and at quite reachable places and he really knows exactly where to find what, if needed! But, next to music, he’s also very fond of books and – in fact since both of us were in Izmir, Turkey, last year – his photographic interest also returned and, logically, became “digital”. I guess I know what many of you may think right now: “Boy, he’s not going to be like Peter, is he?” I doubt if I can answer that question for you or for him, of course, but – since we seem to be “soul-brothers” – the risk is quite virtually present. Nevertheless, an outgrown hobby like that generally seems to be quite harmless, unless and until friends and relatives are (getting) involved, and especially at those moments and in those situations that “the collector” seems not to be able to manage anymore, all by him- or herself……like in my father’s house, of which you see some pictures below.

My father is almost 88 years, he lives by himself. His eyes (sight) recently became very bad. (to be continued)

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12. Our next issue … … will be out mid March, 2006. If there is a topic you wish to be covered, let me know. By then, the present Intensive-2 (BA7) students at DDU will have graduated. We might have some news about DDU. But you have news too, I’m sure. I’m curious to know: news about work, study, looking for a job, finding one, getting married and having babies. Send your news update to [email protected]. And, by the way, if you want to forward this newsletter to a friend, or to use any of its content, feel free to do so.

We wish every one of you a fantastic new year!!! 13. Recent NEWS After the Turkish, Nepalese, Vietnamese, Chinese and Dutch cultural evenings, the time has come to outdo all of them by a MULTINATIONAL CULTURAL EVENING. The date will be January 19. The Pakistani Cultural Evening, announced in the previous newsletter, has been postponed. The multinational event will be organized by the most multinational class DDU ever had: the present BA Intensive 2, better known as ‘BA 7’. Peter van Oosten is coordinating, and I can’t resist assisting him.

This week Frank Ingham passed away after a long period of disease. His wife, our Caroline, has been at his side for all this time and she has helped him fighting and to remain full of hope. Today we’re going to say “Fare well, Frank!”… Have strength, dear Caroline! Peter Waite sent her these thoughts, yesterday. Why not end our newsletter this way… To Caroline Love is the eternal lightness of being Love is the quiet moments together The silly tales remembered The feeling of joy That strange feeling in the pit of your stomach Of expectation as you wait in expectation In a moment he will be here These are all aspects of ones love for someone Loss is the total antithesis Loss is the descent into hell The hell of grief The weight of age of ages descending into your being The pain, the loss, the tears of loss, of loss Of sadness, of sadness Words of kindness and sympathy are of no avail Only time will lighten the pain but never banish it Only time, only time, only time.

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ATTACHMENT TO ‘WHAT IS WISDOM???’ 2nd edition

Big Yellow Taxi They paved paradise And put up a parking lot With a pink hotel, a boutique and a swinging hot spot Don’t it always seem to go That you don’t know what you’ve got Till it’s gone They paved paradise And put up a parking lot They took all the trees And put them in a tree museum And they charged all the people A dollar and a half to see ‘em Don’t it always seem to go ... Hey farmer farmer Put away that D.D.T. now Give me spots on my apples But leave me the birds and the bees Please! Don’t it always seem to go … Late last night I heard the screen door slam And a big yellow taxi Took away my old man Don’t it always seem to go … Joni Mitchell (1969) Best performances by Joni Mitchell (1970, 1975, 1997), Bob Dylan (1972), Counting Crows (2002) Hopstaken Bedrijfsadvies – www.hopstaken.com

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