Dealing With Forgiveness

Genesis 45:1­ Dealing with the issue of forgiveness

Healing for Damaged Emotions” says, “The two primary causes of emotional stress are the failure to forgive and the failure to receive forgiveness. "Forgiving is tough. Excusing is easy. What a mistake it is to confuse forgiving with being mushy, soft, gutless, and oh so understanding. Before we forgive, we stiffen our spine and we hold a person accountable. And only then, in tough-minded judgment, can we do the outrageously impossible thing: we can forgive

­As we have followed the story of Joseph the family is getting closer to full reconciliation  ­The brothers have made two trips for food ­Joseph has put his brothers through a series of test he seated them at the table by their birth order  (Benjamin received 5 times the portion, placed the silver cup in Benjamin's sack)  last week Judah came  back and pleaded with Joseph to take Benjamin's place and be as a servant to Joseph ­the brothers are changed, they have come clean with the truth, they are no longer jealous last week Judah confirmed by his actions that they aren't the same (actions speak louder than words) he  pleaded for Benjamin and he was also concerned about his father (two things that we have yet to see  form the brothers) We have seen that in order for us to come to God we must repent have a change of heart and mind and  last week we saw that Judah was a type of Christ by standing up for Benjamin, Christ acts today as our  mediator between God and man and took our place on the cross of calvary

­Remember as we read today that Joseph has still up to this point not revealed his identity to this  brothers –

also keep in mind that there is a spiritual battle that is taking place at the same time in this family.  Out of this family the messiah is going to come. This family is the nation of Israel. It is a family that  Satan would love to see destroyed

­The nation of Israel is still under a spiritual attack _all families are under attack because strong families make strong churches  And one area that stops many families from being fully reconciled over past hurts and differences is this  area we are going to discuss tonight, the issue of forgiveness

the story of Joseph is the model of forgiveness we as the church are called to forgiveness so it is of the utmost importance that we understand exactly  what it entails It is no longer an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth The Bible says  Eph    4:32  And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's  sake hath forgiven you.  ­After Judah's plea for Benjamin  in verse 33 and 34 Joseph can no longer take it he breaks down and  cries ­Then he reveals himself to his brothers by simply saying I am Jospeh. The same way that Jesus has revealed himself throughout the scriptures  Mar    6:50  For they all saw him, and were troubled. And immediately he talked with them, and saith unto  them, Be of good cheer: it is I; be not afraid

 Jhn    6:20  But he saith unto them, It is I; be not afraid. 

 Act    9:5  And he said, Who art thou, Lord? And the Lord said, I am Jesus whom thou persecutest: [it is]  hard for thee to kick against the pricks.  When we come to the end of ourselves and we come in true repentance to Christ he says the same to us,  It Is I Be not afraid Then Joseph's brothers stood speechless­ years had passed they thought he was dead and he calls them to come near  Mat    11:28  Come unto me, all [ye] that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.   Jam    4:8  Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse [your] hands, [ye] sinners; and purify  [your] hearts, [ye] double minded.  There are three truths from this passage that we can draw from concerning forgiveness

Forgiveness is not overlooking the wrong. Joseph did not pretend that nothing had ever happened. Joseph clearly said “you meant it for evil but God meant it for good.” (50:20). Joseph did not minimize the wrong they had done. He acknowledges that God has a purpose in the situation in verse 5 he says for God sent me before you to preserve life. And in verse 8 so it was not you who sent me here but God thats the good that came out of it- but at the time his brothers meant it for evil God is able to make good come out what appears to be a bad situation- which it why when injustice is done to us we should not react with bitterness but we can react with forgiveness not overlooking the wrong but by seeing the higher purpose. The aged old question why does God allow Evil to exist? Evil exist because of the free will that God gives to man- to eliminate evil would be to take away all of our freedoms. But in evil God is able to produce good Take for instance the Cross- at the cross the greatest evil against a person that could ever be committed was done to JesusHe was innocent, but scourged and put on an old rugged cross- but out of that evil God was able to bring about the salvation of all men who put their faith and trust in Christ Which is why Jesus was able to say Father forgive them for they know not what they have done We must realize that there will be times when we are treated wrong and even evil but by keeping our minds on the higher purpose we are able to forgive those who treat us wrong, not ignoring the wrong or sweeping it under the rug or pretending that we forget but acknowledging it and still choosing to forgive Luk 23:34 Then said Jesus, Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do. And they parted his raiment, and cast lots. Act 7:60 And he kneeled down, and cried with a loud voice, Lord, lay not this sin to their charge. And when he had said this, he fell asleep. Stephen acknowledged the sin but then asked God to forgive them for it

Forgiveness is not taking the blame for the wrong. Sometimes we are guilty of saying it was my fault Joseph did not say, “Its ok boys I know it was my fault, I should have never worn my fancy robe of many colors into the field, I should never have told you about those dreams.” Forgiveness did not mean that Joseph had to take the blame for what had happened. No matter what Joseph said or did, it did not excuse what his brothers had done. In situations where a spouse commits adultery sometimes the other spouse blames themselves

and thats wrong Every person is accountable to God for the sin that they have committed Rom 14:12 So then every one of us shall give account of himself to God. God can make good come out bad but there is no reason for the innocent person to beat themselves up for a wrong that was committed against them

Extending forgiveness is hard. But forgiveness is a decision to bring pain to an end. In order to forgive I must let go of my resentment, bitterness, hurt and pride. Forgiveness is hard but hate is harder. “The miracle of forgiving is the creation of a new beginning. It does not always take away the hurt. It does not deny the past injury. It merely refuses to let them stand in the way of a new start.” (Lewis. B Smedes. Forgive and Forget. ) FORGIVENESS MUST BE ACCEPTED Forgiveness can be offered but it also must be accepted This is something that his where never able to do. Joseph forgave them but they were unable to accept his forgiveness as genuine. Look ahead to chapter 50 and verse 15 after their father dies they are still worried that Joseph is waiting for the right time to get revenge They are still rehearsing past sin which had already been forgiven by Joseph, but which had not fully forgiven them-selves. Here they are years later and Joseph is still reassuring his brothers that they have been forgiven. Often in life the last ones we forgive is ourselves and I think that is exactly what these brothers are still fighting with. As Chuck Swindoll says in his book on Joseph, “Guilt clings to the side of the boat, clawing for a foothold, long after grace has come on board and begun to steer.” [Charles Swindoll. Joseph: A Man of Integrity and Forgiveness. ( The brothers lived with unnecessary guilt How about you? God has forgiven you have you accepted it?? what about in your dealings with others do you overlook the wrongs? Do you blame yourself or make excuses when people do treat you wrong to avoid confrontation an to pretend to forgive God wants us to come clean with him, with each other and with ourselves Jesus is offering forgiveness today made possible by his sacrifice on the cross, he took the blame for us at the same time its not a forgiveness that overlooks our sin, but it deals with it once and for all now you must accept that forgiveness and learn to forgive yourself.