Breakable Bella (part 5)

Edward’s POV: I’m such an idiot. I just ran away from my girlfriend because she started to put her hand down my pants. Was that what she was doing? I’m not even sure. I’m a little lightheaded at the moment. So now I’m standing here in my kitchen, that we never use by the way. Well, aside from some stuff for Bella in the fridge, and Esme’s baking disasters. I can’t believe Bella had to taste that stuff. She is probably still in my room, asking herself why she bothers with me. She has no idea how close I was to taking her right there on my hundred-year-old dresser. But I just can’t. Especially after what happened to her wrist. Now it’s even more clear how breakable she is. Not to mention if she’s emotionally ready for that. Or even if I am. And I’ve had a century to wait. I feel completely human at the moment, and it’s a strange feeling. Not a bad one though. I wonder if she’ll come down or just stay in there and wait for me. Now I’m a little embarrassed. We were just playing around…right? And I started it, after all. I turned to walk toward the stairs at human pace, thinking of what I should say. I looked up and saw that she was already at the top of them. “I think I’m gonna go home. I haven’t made Charlie dinner in a few days,” she said, carefully casual, as she descended. Great. Now I hurt her feelings. “I-- I don’t want you to go. I’m sorry about that.” “I know. But I really should go spend some time with him before I move out, anyway. I’ll see you later?” I didn’t know if that was rhetorical or not, but my only reaction was to grab her arm when she was passing me. Her heart stuttered. “I just don’t want to hurt you, Bella. You understand that, right?” I could feel my eyes burn into hers. She nodded, wide-eyed. I sighed and let her go. She spent less time at my house the next few days and more with Charlie. I could hardly complain; I wanted her to spend time with him before it was too late. But I did not mean to make her feel unwanted. ___________________ Bella’s POV Things have been pretty awkward with Edward the last night with me, but he seems uncomfortable when I try kiss him. But I don’t mind the distance as much as I bruises have formed on my hips and I do not want him would not help my case any.

few days. He still spends the to snuggle up against him or usually would, because small to find out. That really

I realized a need for outside help, so I scrolled through my phone, searching for someone I could trust.

“Hey Alice. Are you alone?” “Yeah I’m shopping by myself. What’s up?” “I have a problem.” “Are you okay?” She sounded worried. “Yeah, it’s just…Edward won’t sleep with me.” I heard loud, musical laughter at the other end. “It’s not funny!” “Sorry. It’s just that he’s my brother. And it’s a little funny. Don’t you have any non-relatives to ask?” “You guys are not even related. And if I told a human girlfriend that my boyfriend does not want to have sex, the next question will be ‘what’s wrong with him?’” Besides, I’ve let my human friends kind of drift away. Since I won’t be able to see them after…” I suddenly had a lump in my throat. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to make you sad. I’ll think about it, Bella. But Edward might be right this time. It’s just safer to wait until after you’re more durable.” “Ugh, will you guys stop using that word! I feel like a lawn mower or something.” “Fine. Well like I said, I’ll think it over.” “Okay, thanks. Love you.” “Love you too.” I was surprised that Alice did not see my request coming. But I guess it was a little impulsive. Luckily, Alice called the next day telling me that after some deep thought, she was going to help me out. Of course, her first plan of action involved clothes. “Alice! That is way too short,” I whined as she handed me a number from her closet. “Or just short enough!” she sang with a knowing grin. I looked at her with hesitance. “Should we ask Jasper for his opinion?” she pondered. “No! God no. This is awkward enough.” “Suit yourself.” When I made no move to put the dress on, she stood behind me and started pulling my clothes off herself. “I can dress myself, you know,” I grumbled as she pulled my shirt over my head. I expected a witty or sharp reply but there was none. I looked behind me and she was staring at my hip. “What?” Oh. Crap. “What happened?” “Nothing. I’m fine.” I shrugged. “Fragile human, remember?” I wanted to ask her not to think about it, but figured it would have the opposite effect. I grabbed the navy dress and put it on myself. “Now what shoes will you torture me with today?” I asked sarcastically to distract her. She smiled but it did not reach her sparkling eyes. “These,” she gushed, pointing to the floor. I groaned loudly, and it was completely natural. I think Edward liked my dress. He didn’t actually say it, but it seemed like he could not form words at all. I figured that was a good sign. At first I thought I was dressed up with no place to go, but Edward changed into a nice outfit when he

got home. (Alice had kicked him out of the house so he couldn’t see me before the “finished product” with makeup and everything.) Alice gave us tickets to see a symphony. I wondered how she got them so last minute, but she said that she saw that we would need them a while ago. ______________________ Edward’s POV: Bella looked absolutely gorgeous tonight. She always does, but with a bit of Alice’s magic, she looked like a goddess. The symphony was over by now and we were walking back to my car. I could not help but wrap my arm around her waist and hold her close. She was so perfect. I paused next to her door and leaned down to kiss her. I rested one hand on her cheek and brushed some loose hairs back. Our lips met and I put my other hand on her hip. She flinched. That was not normal. I pulled away from her and looked at her cautiously. “What?” “You flinched.” “No I didn’t.” Her lying was still as terrible as ever. It would have been humorous if I was not concerned. But I let it go after a few seconds of staring at her and opened her door. I guess I had not really touched her like that since my room incident four days ago. Had I really made her feel that bad about herself? Enough so that she was surprised when I wanted to touch her? Maybe she is just jumpy like I’ve been the past few days when I’ve been trying to restrain myself. I could barely handle cuddling with her. I just hope that this awkwardness will end soon. Damn hormones. _____________________ Bella’s POV: So I had messed up royally last night. I don’t know what I was thinking, putting on a dress like that and expecting him not to touch my hips. Instead of getting one step closer to seducing him, we took one step back because now he is even more cautious. I told Alice I needed a break from the plan. It was exhausting. Besides, today I had something to distract me. I was going to meet Jacob’s imprint, Aubrey. After hearing Jacob gush about her all week, I was sure that she would be wonderful. I walked into the diner and saw Jake sitting at a booth with a blond girl that must be her. I don’t know what I was expecting, but this was not it. She had an aura that reminded me of Lauren. I sighed. This was going to be a long dinner. She did not wait long to start the questioning. “So, Jakey here has told me a few things about you.” Jakey? Seriously? “How did you guys meet?” she asked me after I did not say anything. “Family friend,” I answered nonchalantly. “Known each other since we were born.” She frowned a little. I was tempted to make up stories of us taking baths together.

“So I hear you’re dating Edward Cullen.” She showed distaste at the name. I nodded and shot a look at Jacob. I thought he and Edward had been getting along? He threw me a sympathetic glance. Maybe it was his pack members who got to her. “Are you going to college in the fall?” “Nope. I’m going to do some traveling,” I replied as I picked at my fries. I had decided to stop lying about the internship and just tell the truth as much as possible. Charlie huffed a little but could not say much about it. Though I would have to make a long-term alibi when we returned. “Did you get into one?” she asked condescendingly. I narrowed my eyes a little. “Yes.” I had applied to Washington State at the request of Charlie right before Edward came back. It seemed so long ago, now. She smiled at me stiffly. If I was going to have trouble as a newborn, I was going to take this chick out first. “I’m only going to be a Junior, but I’m planning on Yale.” I did not bother to reply. I could not really imagine Jake in Connecticut. Poor sap. Time continued to pass too slowly, until finally I was able to escape to my truck. I fumbled with my keys a little. Dammit, why did I feel like crying? I guess I was just disappointed in his choice, though it was not even a conscious choice. Maybe love at first sight is not always a great thing. “Bella?” Jacob called after he made sure Aubrey was in their car. He walked over to me. “Are you okay? I’m sorry if she seemed a little rude.” he apologized quietly. I shook my head. “Don’t apologize to me. You’re the one that has to wake up next to her every morning for the rest of your life,” I laughed shakily. “She’s really not bad. She’s actually sweet.” “Are you happy?” I asked seriously. He nodded. “Then that’s all that matters.” I tried to sound convincing. After hugging him goodbye under Aubrey’s distant glare, I hurried off to Edward’s. He greeted me with open arms. I must have looked like I needed it. “Aubrey is terrible,” I mumbled into his chest. “I always imagined him with someone nicer. But it’s not like he can re-imprint, right?” He chuckled. “I have no idea, but I’d imagine not.” “At least she lives far away-- for now.” “Do you want to watch a movie?” “Yeah, sure. Which one?” “We’ve got a selection. All of the ones that you’ve been bugging me to watch.” I looked down at the coffee table in the living room. “Zoolander, Legally Blonde, Dodgeball, Mean Girls--” “You’re willing to watch these dumb movies for me?” He nodded with a slight grin. “Aww, you really do love me,” I laughed with a bit of genuine awe. He kissed my hair. “Just one tonight. I have to take it in small doses.” He pretended to look pained. I pondered for a moment.

“Zoolander. Then you can finally get me and Emmett’s ‘orange mocha frappuccino’ jokes.” “Yes! Finally, I will feel complete,” he teased as he walked over to the DVD player. I chucked a throw pillow at his back and he caught it easily without turning around. We joked throughout the whole movie as I snuggled against him on the couch. It was the happiest I had felt in a while with Edward, and it was just what I needed. I did not even feel the urge to attack him when he was laying next to me. I just wanted him to hold me, and he did. With the night going so well, I was not expecting the tense Edward that waited for me in that same living room the next day. “Let’s talk,” he said as he patted the cushion next to him. His expression was grave. “About what?” I asked as I complied hesitantly. “Sex.” I burst into uncontrollable laughter before I could stop myself. “What?” He was trying to keep a straight face. “It feels like a Salt N Pepa song,” I gasped between giggles. “Baby.” Then finally he could not contain his own laughter and it was much louder than mine. “Edward, I’m sorry,” I said as seriously as I could after a moment. “About what?” He was slowly calming down. “About trying to push you into this. If it’s supposed to happen, it will. Otherwise I can wait until I’m a vampire. I should have respected your concerns more.” He looked surprised. “What brought this on?” “Last night. We had so much fun just being together.” “So this does not have to do with the bruises?” he asked with subtle disbelief. I froze. “Alice?” I asked hesitantly. He nodded. “She wasn’t trying to betray you. I just caught her off guard when she was thinking about it today in her room. She was worried about you.” “You’re not mad?” “At you, no. I’m always mad at myself when I hurt you. I wish you would have told me to loosen my grip a little though.” “I was sort of lacking self-control at that moment.” He laughed. “You and me both.” “Well that’s still not my reason. No self-preservation, remember?” “Right.” A moment passed in silence. Then I blushed before I could help it. “What?” he asked, amused. “Did you see her mental picture of the bruises?” My voice squeaked a little. Understanding washed over his face and he laughed lightly. “Yes, that picture of you in your bra will serve to tide me over for a bit.” “Oh my God.” I hid my face in my hands. Note to self: never let Alice see me

naked. He pulled them away and kissed my blazing cheek. “Stop. You were beautiful as always.” He looked at me with such admiration that I forgot to be embarrassed.