Murphys' Law

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Murphy's laws origin

The following article was excerpted from The Desert Wings March 3, 1978 Murphy's Law ("If anything can go wrong, it will") was born at Edwards Air Force Base in 1949 at North Base. It was named after Capt. Edward A. Murphy, an engineer working on Air Force Project MX981, (a project) designed to see how much sudden deceleration a person can stand in a crash. One day, after finding that a transducer was wired wrong, he cursed the technician responsible and said, "If there is any way to do it wrong, he'll find it." The contractor's project manager kept a list of "laws" and added this one, which he called Murphy's Law. Actually, what he did was take an old law that had been around for years in a more basic form and give it a name. Shortly afterwards, the Air Force doctor (Dr. John Paul Stapp) who rode a sled on the deceleration track to a stop, pulling 40 Gs, gave a press conference. He said that their good safety record on the project was due to a firm belief in Murphy's Law and in the necessity to try and circumvent it. Aerospace manufacturers picked it up and used it widely in their ads during the next few months, and soon it was being quoted in many news and magazine articles. Murphy's Law was born. The Northrop project manager, George E. Nichols, had a few laws of his own. Nichols' Fourth Law says, "Avoid any action with an unacceptable outcome." The doctor, well-known Col. John P. Stapp, had a paradox: Stapp's Ironical Paradox, which says, "The universal aptitude for

ineptitude makes any human accomplishment an incredible miracle." Nichols is still around. At NASA's Jet Propulsion Lab in Pasadena, he's the quality control manager for the Viking project to send an unmanned spacecraft to Mars. Murphy's Law or Sod's Law? While I admit that the name of Murphy's laws is a pleasant one as is the story of how it came to light, but the original name for 'if anything can go wrong it will' was sod's law because it would happen to any poor sod who needed such a catastrophic event the least. It also removes the ability to say "I coined this phrase!" because sod's law has been around long before any living man and has existed in many forms for hundreds of years. In the English County of Yorkshire I know it to have been around for generations because it has been passed through several Yorkshire families I know. But this original name is dying out because sod over here is a cursory so is not used much. Murphy's on the other hand is nothing insulting or lacking in hope I hope this clears any problems up and while this maybe hard to come to terms with, think about it, would such an obvious piece of logic have only come about in the second half of the 20th century???? Chris Monkman In the late 1960's I read an article that was photocopied from a magazine where I saw the term "Murphy's Law" coined. Should I say, I believe the term was coined in this article. It had a photo of a bearded man in the upper right corner. The article began simply by describing all the things that had gone wrong in Murphy's life. Near the end of the first section of the article it described the formalization of Murphy's Law, as Murphy was waiting for the pending birth of his first child. Later in the article other formulations/corollaries of Murphy's law were described. The most memorable one was the mathematical formulation. It was pictured in the text as 1 + 1 -> 2, where the -> was a hand with the index finger pointing to the right. The text defined -> as "hardly every equals". What prompted me to write this was the foot note on this page, where the author of this comment indicated that the law was not formalized at Edwards Air Force Base, but rather another source. To the best of my memory, it was in or about the fall of 1968, I saw the photo copied article that presented Murphy's Law. I do

not remember the magazine or it's date. What lead me to this site was the quest for the article described above. To my suprise and disappointment, no one has included the article. I would be interesting to publish this description and see if anyone else remembers the article or any other facts that would help find it. Joe Smith One more thing about the origin of Murphy Law One important fact about Murphy's Law was that it was not actually coined by Murphy, but by another man of the same name. Michael Another thing about the origin of Murphy Law can anyone originate a law? I thought that they could only be discovered Erin How Mr. Murphy died: One dark evening (in the U.S.), Mr. Murphy's car ran out of gas. As he hitchhiked to a gas station, while facing traffic and wearing white, he was struck from behind by a British tourist who was driving on the wrong side of the road. Terry Maynard Lansing, Michigan Another story about the origin of Murphy's Law Commander J. Murphy USN was a procurement officer for the US Navy in the 1930's. He was in charge of the procurement of aircraft. When monitoring the design and development of new aircraft, he tried to instill simplicity of maintenance into the likes of Douglas and Grumman. Apparently one of his most belabored expressions was: "If an aircraft fitter on one of our carriers can re-install a serviced component wrongly, then one day he will." Gradually, this got changed into the more familiar version we know today, according to the version on the origin of Murphy's Law I heard.

Incidentally, a lot of Brits think that Murphy's Law is an Irish joke. Murphy is an Irish name of course, and the Irish have been the butt of jokes from Brits for a long time. Anyway, a lot of Brits seem to think that what Murphy's Law refers to is that the Irish are to blame for things going wrong because they are careless or stupid or both, at least according to British mythology on the Irish. Frank Teunissen

Murphy's love laws • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

All the good ones are taken. If the person isn't taken, there's a reason. The nicer someone is, the farther away (s)he is from you. Brains x Beauty x Availability = Constant. This constant is always zero. The amount of love someone feels for you is inversely proportional to how much you love them. Money can't buy love, but it sure gets you a great bargaining position. The best things in the world are free --- and worth every penny of it. Every kind action has a not-so-kind reaction. Nice guys (girls) finish last. The good ones die first. If it seems too good to be true, it probably is. Availability is a function of time. The minute you get interested is the minute they find someone else. The more beautiful the woman is who loves you, the easier it is to leave her with no hard feelings. Nothing improves with age. No matter how many times you've had it, if it's offered take it, because it'll never be quite the same again. Sex has no calories. Sex takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble. There is no remedy for sex but more sex. Sex appeal is 50% what you've got and 50% what people think you've got. No sex with anyone in the same office. Sex is like snow; you never know how many inches you are going to get or how long it is going to last. A man in the house is worth two in the street.

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If you get them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow. Virginity can be cured. When a man's wife learns to understand him, she usually stops listening to him. Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself. The qualities that most attract a woman to a man are usually the same ones she can't stand years later. Sex is dirty only if it's done right. It is always the wrong time of month. The best way to hold a man is in your arms. When the lights are out, all women are beautiful. Sex is hereditary. If your parents never had it, chances are you won't either. Sow your wild oats on Saturday night -- Then on Sunday pray for crop failure. The game of love is never called off on account of darkness. It was not the apple on the tree but the pair on the ground that caused the trouble in the garden. Sex discriminates against the shy and the ugly. Before you find your handsome prince, you've got to kiss a lot of frogs. There may be some things better than sex, and some things worse than sex. But there is nothing exactly like it. Love your neighbor, but don't get caught. Love is a hole in the heart. If the effort that went in research on the female bosom had gone into our space program, we would now be running hot-dog stands on the moon. Love is a matter of chemistry, sex is a matter of physics. Do it only with the best. Sex is a three-letter word which needs some old-fashioned fourletter words to convey its full meaning. One good turn gets most of the blankets. You cannot produce a baby in one month by impregnating nine women. Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. The person who said that it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all...NEVER loved and lost! Thou shalt not commit adultery.....unless in the mood. Never lie down with a woman who's got more troubles than you. Abstain from wine, women, and song; mostly song. Never argue with a women when she's tired -- or rested. A woman never forgets the men she could have had; a man, the women he couldn't.

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What matters is not the length of the wand, but the magic in the stick. It is better to be looked over than overlooked. Never say no. A man can be happy with any woman as long as he doesn't love her. Folks playing leapfrog must complete all jumps. Beauty is skin deep; ugly goes right to the bone. Never stand between a fire hydrant and a dog. A man is only a man, but a good bicycle is a ride. Love comes in spurts. The world does not revolve on an axis. Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation; the other eight are unimportant. Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking. Don't do it if you can't keep it up. There is no difference between a wise man and a fool when they fall in love. Never go to bed mad, stay up and fight. Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another. "This won't hurt, I promise." Nothing improves with age. An ex-wife/husband will always be "till death do us part". When a man wants his wife to hear, she doesn't listen. When that same man doesn't want his wife to hear, she's all ears. It's always easier to get a partner if you already have one. Although it may seem like that on the outside, no one is having fun being single If you're heart is broken, sweep up the pieces. There will always be someone who will want to put it back together. Love and high-school must NEVER go together. If a man speaks deep in the forest and there is no woman there to hear him; is he still wrong? Show me a husband who won't, I'll show you a neighbor who will It doesn't matter HOW good it was, if you end up worrying or regretting it, it was bad sex You get the best sex from the worst one for you Never trust a woman who acts like you are so sexy she can't help herself but drag you to bed No one is as fascinating as they think If you believe a relationship can't work, but feel the need to try, it won't. Corollary: You will later find out that your lack of belief caused it to fail.

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The duration of a relationship to a person is inversely proportionate to the importance of person to you. The Key to a woman's heart is an unexpected gift at an unexpected time. The two thing no man can ever understand; Women and what makes all men complete damn fools over women. Love makes believers of us all. Translation: Love obscures common sense. Being taken attracts women. Being single makes them avoid you like the plague. If you go behind a girl you are heading to trouble. In the eternal battle of the sexes, women are already the winners. When with your girlfriend you will always have gas. Celibacy is not heredity. The hornier someone is, the less likely that it will be they have sex. Corollary Horniness is inversely related to one's chance of scoring The man shalt not win the argument he started The man shalt not win the argument he didn't start If a man won an argument, it was just in his head (for the ladies) Try and try as you might, there will still be times where men are just assholes. We can't help it and we're sorry A love will tell you they love you endlessly. A true love will tell everyone else they love you endlessly despite the embarrassment factor When all else fails, have hope Eichel's Rule - During sex, try to sweat In Romance; and in Finance we play with Figures. A cauliflower resembles a rose, if your eyesight is not 6/6 Before falling in love do take your backup, it always helps in recovery. if a man has it he won't want it, the guy who buys it won't use it, the guy who uses it could give a shit about it, so don't give a shit and you will have it all. Love has all the answers. But till then sex brings up some good questions. Sex on the TV can't hurt you unless you fall off. Anticipation is 98% of the pleasure The amount of members of the opposite sex you pursue is inversely proportional to pretty much everything about you, such as intelligence. If you are interested in someone, a close friend will grab their attention.



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This is especially likely if they: A.) Don't want the attention of said person and/or B.) Are already dating someone else The ABC rule: If A is attracted to B, and you are attracted to C, A has a better chance with B than you do with C. B and C are often the same person. The uglier the girl the closer she lives. If any things will happen on the first date, you won't have a condom. The size of the pencil is not as important as the quality of the writing. Corollaries: The quality of the writing is affected by the quality of the paper. Regardless of how well one writes, it is difficult to write at all unless there is lead in the pencil. Marriage is the greatest leveler. Girls are like toilet rooms. Either it is taken, or full of sh*t. If you're having difficulties choosing between potential two girls, you'll always pick the wrong one. If it seems perfect today, tomorrow it will end. If a girl tell you "let's stay friends", she won't call ever again. If you call, she won't answer. You'll always catch fever before the first date. Never make love in your back garden. Love is blind, but not your neighbors. Or in another version: Don't make love by the garden gate, love is blind but the neighbors ain't. Love is blind. Marriage is an eye opener When it comes to love and lost, doing the right thing always hurts. Being honest with someone will always turn that person into an enemy. When you're girlfriend says that you have to talk the relationship is over. The day you decide to tell you're girlfriend you could not live without her she will leave you the next day. You're best friend stop being you're best friend the instant a beautiful woman walks in and you both are attracted to her. The more you want a women the least she will want you. When she says: "Don't buy me anything expensive" and you listen, expect to be single. Even the most beautiful woman in the world has at least one guy who is tired of her.

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If you marry a beautiful girl she'll turn into her mother. If you marry a plain girl she'll turns into her dad. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife. But they never said anything about their daughter. The mother of the man, or the father of the woman you love will invariably hate you. The best men (or women) are always taken--or crazy. When you take your time getting ready your date will arrive 20 min. early; when you're on time they're 30 min. late. As soon as you break up the man (or woman) who couldn't commit TO YOU will get married. A good women/men are like parking spots, all the good ones are taken. Procrastination is a lot like masturbation, it feels good until you realize your just fucking yourself Women are like boats: they require constant maintenance and attention, and they cost a lot of money. Men are like buses: another one will eventually come along. Never forget: Don't fuck with Mrs. Murphy! Kracke/Malenka Law: Good from far, far from good. Walter/Kerwin Law: Any good looking person you see that isn't alone, will be accompanied by a person of the opposite sex who doesn't deserve to be with them. The length of a relationship is directly related to how much you are attracted to your significant other best friend. No woman\men is better than two Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question - YES is the answer. Romance is when common sense flies out of the window. Being told your the nicest guy they know is the kiss of death. Everybody is most horny when alone. Beauty is directly proportional to the number of drinks consumed. Corollary: Beauty is also directly related to the time remaining until last call. The other side lawyers are always better then yours. The partner you want don't want you. The ones that want you are not made for you. Any "Why" question, has no answer, and if it does, that answer is not logical. Love will cause people to do stupid things. Loving someone to much may be cause for a restraining order. If you love a person let them go. If they don't come back they weren't worth it. Sex ends all interest.

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Cute now equal annoying later. Not everything takes longer than you expect. It's only kinky the first time you do it. Halmos law: To get your significant other you need: Time. Money and Energy. The sum of the three is constant. If you are short of one of them, you need quite a lot of the remaining two. If you are short of two of them, you need tremendous amount of the remaining one. If you are short of all the three, no hope. Otherwise the result is always success. The love of your life will only want you back once you are in another serious relationship. You don't pay for sex, you pay him/her to leave after you're done. Beaches law: If you think a girl is beautiful, her boyfriend will always be there to confirm it. Seduction law: Your seduction potential is inversely proportional to your willingness to seduce The most intelligent statements will be thought of at the most inappropriate times. (i.e. during a make out session, strike up a law of Quantum physics, thus demonstrating that you are not interested in the other person). You never truly know a significant other until you meet him/her in a court of law. No matter how beautiful/wonderful s/he may seem to be, there's always someone out there that's sick and tired of his/her s**t too. The boyfriend of the girl you like is a ... If (s)he wants to dump you, (s)he will find a reason. or If (s)he wants to dump you, (s)he will. (wo)man = time + money time = money (wo)man = money2 Money = √evil (money is root of evil) man = evil I know the math here doesn't hold. but it's funny, so I'll leave it here. Marriage is like a dog with a bone, he might not touch it, just doesn't let another dogs come near it. Everything that glitters, is not WET. When you finally bed the attractive blond/e, s/he'll nick your wallet and watch. Unless you owe him/her fifty quid.

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Marriage is the ending of a perfectly good sex life Albert Einstein Gravity Law Gravity cannot be held responsible for 2 people falling in love. The difference between love and the common cold is that for the common cold there is a vaccine. The Tommy Lee/Pamela Anderson law for celebrity couple Persona-polarization: The most beautiful women in the world, always marry the most ugly men. The Carmen Electra/ Dennis Rodman corollary The most beautiful men in the world ALSO marry the most ugly AND most crazy men in the world. If you love her/him, s/he doesn't love you If you are in love, he/she isn't If you want love, you don't get it If a beautiful wo/man loves you, it's fake If you are happy together, wait till you are married It's always the quiet ones that have the two dozen corpses in their basements. love can be your best friend and/or your worst enemy Wedding cake cures nymphomania. Everyone believe in love, but wonder if it exists You may get off on a cheap hooker but you can't get off on a cheap lawyer The one thing that will almost certainly come between two friends is a girl The sexier a man is, the better the chances that he is gay Being told that someone doesn't want to date you because you're such a good friend, is like being told that you didn't get the job because you're overqualified When you've got them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow the girl/boyfriend who says s/he is... isn' You don't fall in love, you fall in a hole. The depth of the hole is proportionate to how oblivious you are of the fall. The best way to get over a woman.....is to get over another You always need a more patient partner no matter how patient s/he is Even when a man is listening, he's gonna get it wrong. Absence makes the heart go wander. The person you want the most will end up with the person you hate the most. If you get it, it will be taken away The perfection of a person is proportional to how much you love him/her.

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The imperfection of a person is proportional to how much you hate him/her. Rebillot's Law of Infertility: You never know that you're infertile until you try to fertilize. In any married couple, both members think that they will be the first one to die, which means that at least 50% of the people will be wrong. You'll think of a great line to say to someone the moment after your chance is gone.

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