London - A Short Story By Rose

London - The city that sleeps sometimes, but only when you feel like it. I was sat next to my friend Jessie and I was scared. Real scared. I mean sure, I loved him deep down inside, at least I kidded myself I did. When he proposed to me, I said yes. ‘Why not?’ I had thought, ‘It will be great, you love him, don’t you??’ To be honest, I was never sure if I did. Steve was great. Kind, funny and was very rich. But deep down I always wondered if I just loved him for the money, rather than for himself. He’d take me out on lots and lots of dates to all the best places. Shows, clubs, restaurants and once we even went inside Buckingham palace. I was Steve’s girl, and I always thought he was my guy. But here sitting in a night club on my girl’s night out I was starting to regret my descions. “Erm,Jessie I want to take off,” I shouted in her ear. Jessie stared at me and then narrowed her eyes. “Why?” she yelled back. I was debating whether to tell her why. “Just tired I guess.” She scrutinized my expression. “Is it about the wedding?” She asked. My face must have said it all because she grabbed my arm and dragged me to a quieter part of the club. “What’s up hmm?” She seemed somewhat very annoyed and yet I couldn’t understand why. “Well, I’m not sure if I love him really.” I admitted in defeat. She rolled her eyes at me. “Then don’t marry him.” She said it like it was that simple. I sighed, nodded my head and reassured her I was fine. She eyed up a guy standing near us, jived over to him and started chatting to him. I was all alone. I felt a huge weight lift off me as I heard a voice over the drum and bass. “Malady” a gentleman’s voice purred. I turned round and grinned widely. “James! Why are you here? I mean wow, I’ve missed you” I babbled. He just grinned back, grabbed my arm and pulled me outside. “c’mon, let’s get out of here and I’ll tell you all about it.” I was over the moon. James my best friend ever had turned up when I needed him most. I nodded, jerked my thumb back inside to indicate I was telling Jessie and disappeared into the crowd. “Guess who turned up” my mouth was wide with delight when I spoke to her. “Who?” she was clearly irritated I had interrupted her hitting on some middle aged prick. “James, I’m heading out with him, see you.” I cried the last bit as I started to bolt out the door. I ran outside. James was there, arms wide waiting impatiently for his hug. Hugging James was like hugging a bear. He was warm. Very warm and always grasped you tightly till you couldn’t breathe. When he finally let go he grabbed hold of my hand and dragged me along with him. James was a very comfortable person. He didn’t think hand holding any random person was a problem, even someone engaged. “So, how is life treating you darling?” he asked. I wanted to tell him it was great, but my face dropped and he picked up on that. “What’s wrong?” His expression was full of fear and worry. I groaned and cursed myself for being too easy to read. “It’s nothing” I tried to soothe him but he wouldn’t buy it. “Suz, tell me what’s wrong right this second,” his angry expression frightened me but then his features softened, “please.” I sighed but gave in. “I’m not sure I love steve.” I admitted, my face flushing a deep red. He took in what I said and pulled a thoughtful face. “Oookkkaaayy,” he lengthened the word, “why not?” I blushed again and he noticed that too.

“You’re blushing!” He cried almost accusingly. I looked down, praying, hoping he could not read my eyes and know a secret I had kept hidden for so long, it was a long shot I’ll admit to keep something as big as this from James, but I attempted anyway. It didn’t last long. “You like someone else don’t you.” I nodded keeping my eyes down. When at last I dared myself to look up I saw his kind eyes staring down on me. It had never occurred to me before how beautiful his eyes were. I pulled a face and then quickly returned to looking at the floor. The bit of crunchy nut wrapper, the gum that someone couldn’t be bothered to dump in the bin and splatter of a rain drop I hadn’t noticed before. As if I needed it the heavens opened. Hoping to make a quick escape I stuck out my hand for a taxi, but he followed. “You’re not going anywhere without telling me everything.” His eyes stared deep in my own and I found myself trying the control an emotion I had not felt before. “TAXI!” He yelled, causing me to stare at his mouth. Not too big, not too small, just right. I chuckled it reminded me of the story of goldilocks and the three bears. He turned to face me and I saw his eyes for a moment linger on my own lips, something I had not noticed before. “74, crossroads street,” he said to the taxi driver. He must have read my expression as he had to explain to me where we were going. “My flat.” He sounded out the words like they were the most obvious things on the planet. I just nodded trying to make sense of these unfamiliar feelings I was suddenly feeling towards my best friend. I started to feel queasy. I glanced at the window too afraid to look at him. Suddenly I was jolted with an electric current as I felt James’s hands curl round mine. I must have gasped as the taxi driver asked if I was ok. I nodded but didn’t try to free my hand. It felt right. We stopped. We must have arrived. He thanked the taxi driver and dragged my along with him, still attached to his right hand. It was warm. “Come on honey, I’m going to help you.” His voice frightened me until I realized I was not scared at all but merely excited. This new feeling was...nice. “Sure, I mean, yes I’ll tell you, erm, so yeah.” Why couldn’t I speak properly now? I had never had a problem around him before. I felt utterly helpless, a complete idiot. I figured I must look pretty stupid as well. My hair was wild and out of control. But James didn’t seem to mind. He unlocked the door and gently pulled me inside. “So...what do you think?” he was being polite, but I was certain I had heard an undercurrent of another meaning. “It’s lovely.” Surprisingly I meant it. Satisfied he smiled and dropped my hand. “Erm can you excuse me one moment.” He shifted to his left and down a short corridor. I assumed he was going to the loo and so sat down to have a moment as I shuffled my thoughts. In my head I was debating whether I liked Steve or not, whether I had made the right choice deciding to say yes when he proposed, and I wanted to know what this new feeling I was feeling for my best friend. I waited, looking around the room to amuse myself. My eyes caught something. A little box that looked a lot like an engagement ring sat on his shelf. Curious as I was I walked over to have a look, well tried too. However I heard a short but firm cough behind me and so turned around. James looked divine, need I say more? He had changed his shirt and I could smell a delicious fragrance coming of his skin from the opposite side if the room. “Shall we,” he gestured to the couch. “Sure.” That was all I could manage. “Ok, so, you think you don’t love Steve and you love someone else, is this correct?” His eyes were cautious, but something in them was yelling at me something really obvious that I clearly had missed. “Yes, this is correct.” Why was I being so formal?

“So are you going to marry Steve?” It was silent for a few moments as I thought about this. Being too afraid to answer I shook my head. Was that a glimmer of hope in his eyes? “So, tell me Suz, who is it you like?” I hesitated, dropped my eyes and twiddled my thumbs. He waited. “Well...” I started, “I’m a little unsure myself.” My expression was confused and that glimmer of hope died. “Do you want a drink?” As if I could drink at this precise moment. “Sure,” I replied. He got up quite quickly and I felt his hand brush against my leg by accident, the electric from his body bolted through me and I suddenly felt alert. I felt his eyes on me. “Are you alright?” he was honestly concerned. “Yes,” but he didn’t look convinced. He left me anyway to get me a drink. I was deciding whether to follow or not when he came back rather quickly, no drink in hand. “Erm, sorry I thought you were following, the kitchen is this way,” He pointed. I felt his presence behind me and it took all of my strength not too look at him. I pushed a door and it swung open with ease. I gaped, his kitchen was gorgeous. I quickly shut my mouth and edged in, too afraid to touch anything. He walked past me and to a cupboard containing wine. “Red or white?” he looked amused like he was laughing at some private joke. “What time is it?” He was confused. “What?” he stammered. “I was wondering what the time was, if it’s late, I don’t want wine,” I want you I suddenly thought. Embarrassed by the comment in my mind I blushed. “Well its only 10 o’clock, is that too late?” He was genuinely curious. “No, that’s fine.” It felt all too formal. Feeling more confident I walked towards the counter as he held out a drink for me. “Thanks,” I muttered. He grinned and it felt like old times again. “So when are you going to tell him? Steve this is.” I shrugged. “Not tonight, tomorrow.” He just nodded. The silence was uncomfortable and so I filled it with babble. “Yes, I feel bad but I think Jessie likes him,” where was this coming from? I had never thought that in my life. Was this because of the way she was acting earlier? He raised his eyebrows at me. “Of course I’m not entirely sure,” I continued, “It just sometimes seems that way,” I finished. He stepped towards me. Using his fingers he lifted my face up to his. “You are absurd.” He said simply and with that placed his lips on mine liked they belonged there. I felt my heart stutter, my legs go jelly and my mind whirl. This was right and it was perfect. I could feel his lips gently moving along with mine. He pulled away softly, and looked up at me through his eyelashes. “Sorry.” But he didn’t sound it. Sorry? SORRY? Why on this earth was he sorry, that was the most amazing thing in the WORLD! He saw my frown and sheepishly grinned at me. “Forgiven?” I couldn’t help but laugh at his expression. “More than that,” I replied and pressed my lips to his once more. I could feel the shock in his kiss, but soon we were melting in each other’s arms, oblivious to the world... I woke with a start. At first I felt really disorientated. I was sure there was someone next to me, I could feel them moving. Slowly I moved my eyes down on the apparent figure next to me. It was my cat. I was at first shocked and then immensely relieved. I sighed. My mind tried to wander back to last night, but I

could remember very little. Had I had sex with James? It was wrong; I wasn’t over with Steve yet, at least not officially. Slightly worried now I decided I had better call James and ask him what happened. Sitting up I felt a sudden rush to the head and fell straight back down again. I felt a slight rustle to my right and I turned abruptly curious. There was a small envelope. Cautiously I opened it, trying desperately not to give myself a paper cut. I grabbed the letter that was hidden inside. This is what it read.

Good morning sleepy head. I thought I had better leave a note to explain last night. Nothing happened I assure you and I am behind you whatever descions you make. You were so tired you fell asleep so I took you home. I hope you don’t mind. Speak soon, all my love James x. I was shocked. No words could describe how incredibly lucky I felt to have someone like James, Someone who was easily the most perfect best friend in the entire world. I read the letter once, then again and popped it into my pocket. I was still dressed and since I had very little time to get ready I just slipped out into what I had been wearing the night before. Thank goodness I had never been one for short dresses and miniskirts, what would my boss think?!? I walked to my usual parking spot and I was again taken by a jolt of surprise mixed with care and devotion. Another letter lay on my car window screen.

You are beautiful. James x So simple and yet I couldn’t stop my heart going into over drive and exploding with love in my chest. I pulled the door open and climbed in. I waited a moment till I felt fit enough to drive and then started the long and dull journey to work... “Where were you last night?” Jessie demanded. “Sorry what?” I was day dreaming. Again. “You just left me there with that creepy guy...” I thought they had got on fine, “...and then when I go to look for you I find you missing!” Her face was angry. “I told you, I went with James, the club wasn’t really my scene.” I had never in my entire life used those words before and so it shook me when I used them. ‘That’s it’ I thought ‘I’m doomed!’ “What. Exactly. Happened?”Her voice hovered on ‘exactly’. I sighed and took a deep breath. “We went back to his place, and chatted for a bit, I must have fallen asleep and so he took me home. Nothing happened.” Her eyes narrowed, but she believed me. I was a better liar than I thought. So not to go back onto the subject of me I asked her what was wrong with the guy she was talking too. “He was cute, but just sooo dull!” She complained. “Aww Jessie!” I decided to sympathise with her. “I know! Anyway I should probably get on with my work. Boss is right up my arse from being behind!” She grinned and it felt like primary school again. The boss was Steve and today I was going to tell him I didn’t want to marry him. I was dead meat. “Come in.” I pushed the door and carefully stepped inside. I could feel my face sweating and my palms sticking to my skirt.

“You wanted to talk sir?” I was trying to be polite. “Now now, don’t call me sir, remember I am your fiancé.” And then he winked at me. I could feel my face going red. I couldn’t do this! I gulped in some air and turned to face him. “Steve, we need to talk.” His face dropped. “What do you mean ‘we need to talk’” And his hands made the little movements in the air. This was going to sting. “I can’t marry you.” I blurted it out in desperation to get it over and done with. His face turned white. “...why...?” His voice could barely mouth out the words. This was going to hurt him a lot. Could I do it? “Well...I...erm...maybe...like...someone...else” I eventually splattered it out. I looked up and saw his face. It was so white he could have been dead. “Then I’m going to have to let you go.” He whispered it as if it was the last thing in the world he wanted to say. I would have protested but I saw it coming. “I’ll leave now.” I nodded once and went to turn towards the door but he called me back. “Can I have my ring back?” I sighed, looked down at the ring and gently eased it off my fingers. “Here,” I said as I dropped it into his hand. Our hands brushed but there was no electricity and I knew I was making the right descion. I walked through the door and didn’t look back. I packed up my stuff in the view of gobsmacked people and drifted out of the room. I was free from my old life. From Steve, from my lousy job and my actually pretty lousy best friend, I was leaving them all behind, and I wasn’t afraid, but happy. I felt the air beneath my feet almost lift me off the ground and I could feel myself floating on cloud nine but this was rudely interrupted when I bumped into someone. Oops. I grinned sheepishly and then stepped out in to the cool London air. I was going to be with the man I had always wanted. I stepped out into the road. Foolishly I wasn’t watching where I was walking, and that a two ton lorry was screeching its breaks at me and beeping its horn to get me to move. I only noticed it when the impact knocked me off my cloud and onto the floor. I could feel the blood seeping out of me. I saw faces staring down at me but didn’t recognise any of them. I could hear people shouting, screaming, calling for help, but I did not hear what they said. My eyes shut and I could feel myself slipping away. Why now? No I was determined to stay alive, so I fought against the darkness best I could. But soon the darkness surrounded me. Death is peaceful. The darkness was calm. I didn’t feel any emotion but I was alone. Occasionally I would hear a beeping far off in the distance but even though I searched I could never find it. It was only what seemed a long time later did I hear voices. They were far away and I could only pick up words now and then. “She’s in a coma,” One of the voices said. “She may well die sir,” another explained. “She must not die.” This voice scared me. It was angry. I could feel a warm hand against my cool skin. It felt strange but was not unpleasant. Time passed slowly, or too me it felt that way. I tried to think of any memories, but I had none. They were forgotten, hidden. This upset me and I wanted to sob, but my body refused to cry. I felt numb. Was I ever going to get out of this dark place? To me it felt like I never would. Never again would I see the sun, the stars or the moon. I was a depressed person trapped in a place I could no longer stand, but I was too upset to fight. I felt an overwhelming surge of numbness and then the beeping stopped.

London – the city that sleeps but only when you feel like it. This was the first fact I learnt of London. I learnt how it can influence people and how it can make people change their descions. I can’t bring myself to regret any descions I made ever in my life. I was happy. I am happy. I will be happy wherever that may be. The End.