Impotence; The Sexual Trial Of The Aging Male

Impotence: The Sexual Trial of the Aging Male Daniel J. Pool Human Sexuality Paper III Dr. Pilkington

Very few things frighten the average, adult, human make in the post-modern present as much as the looming shadow of impotence. A male, from the very beginnings of his youth, often associates his rank in the interpersonal hierarchy with his physical abilities and prowess. For though be it a million reasons why, man never evolved much further, emotionally, past the wooden boundaries of the sandbox1. Many trials of manhood often surround the symbol of masculinity, the penis. Whether it is the size of the thing or how he uses it, it is viewed as the staple of how men “measure up” in the testosterone arena of manhood. So no wonder it is the single most feared sexual dysfunction of the man, the couple, and the “pack” (or close same gender friends) to be… IMPOTENT! If the penis is the symbol of the males’ metaphysical prowess, then what impactions are there to the loss of that ability? How does this impact society? How does this impact the individual? Even masked crusaders suffer from the inability to gain erections. As for example, newly released “Watchmen” character, Nite Owl (who suffers inability to reach an erection without a costume on), struggles with this very same dysfunction. But, is the problem psychological, or simply old age and/or physical malady? Some doctors of medicine have gone as far as to say that ninety-percent of all sexual performance dysfunctions are psychogenic (Dunlap & Grosset, 1975). To better understand this rather normal, about 10% of men worldwide (Nevid, Rathus, Rathus 2005), phenomenon one must investigate and evaluate the principles of; what causes impotence, how impotence affects the individual and the community, and what can be done to aid those affected by erectile dysfunction. There exist many reasons for male sexual performance dysfunction. It can stem from a phobia of sexual contact or more commonly from performance anxiety says some researchers (Nevid, Rathus, Rathus 2005). However Masters and Johnson described that it is much more indepth than simply fear of contact or inability to perform. Their theory breaks 1

Though much theorizing could be done at this point, for the purposes of this paper we must stay on one topic.

impotence into two groups; the primary and secondary impotence suffers. Primary impotence is the inability to perform from an early inappropriate son-mother relationship or severe indoctrination of sexual taboos (Johnson, Masters 1970). Secondary impotence derives from usually a long term failure to not ejaculate early that then grows into a fear of performance. Early ejaculation is very closely tied to alcoholic tendencies and drug abuse, general weariness, or psychological trauma. Another more common cause of impotence is natural aging. Another prospective projection of erectile dysfunction is depression (Offit, 1977). Often starting as an over active sex drive because of mild depression (filling self-esteem needs), during these over active periods premature ejaculations can begin and slip into deeper depression due to performance anxiety. During deep depression the male in question will lose his sexual ability due to a lack of desire, and the psychosomatic associations. The final theory of male impotence is that a male whose sexual prowess is threatened by a partner with a different style of sex—i.e. dominant or submissive typically—can cause a man to lose interest with certain partners, as the “improper” arousal will cause a man to go into a sort-of flight-or-fight stage of thinking where his blood is sent to the palms, arms, legs, and lungs instead of the penis (Dunlap & Grosset, 1975). The most common group that begins to be impotent is men over fifty (Johnson, Masters 1970), and with social demands of the man with the knowledge that he will slowly be less sexually able is usually the most psychological damaging then physical. Over time the aging man simply takes longer to be fully activated physically, needing more sexual stimulation before intercourse, which is then transferred into psychological feelings of inadequacy. The demand on the man to perform pushes him further to try and “force” (Offit, 1977) or will (Nevid, Rathus,

Rathus 2005) an erection sending him further and further into feelings of inability and guilt at not being able to perform. The fear or inability altogether can cause such a strain on an individual that it penetrates all levels of a man’s ability to enjoy even non-sexual activities (Dunlap & Grosset, 1975). In the case of one postal worker, he could not form long standing relationships with woman due to his feelings of inability to perform [a primary impotence due to on set early before becoming sexually active (Johnson, Masters 1970)] which then transposed on to feelings of rejection. From this he was unable to form meaningful relationships with non-sexual partners; other men, family (except for one brother), and women with whom he did not want sexual intercourse form due to his fear that he could not engage sexually the way he felt he would if he got into an emotional relationship. Also this postal worker developed an unhealthy need for marijuana to help him cope with these feelings of rejection. Such behavior could endanger his job, and definitely hurt his social interaction. Karen, a clothes designer talked about her and her husband’s erectile dysfunction saying that if he was cheating on her it would not bother her half as much as the feeling of rejection she felt when her husband was unable to become hard enough to penetrate her during intercourse. Often these problems extend past the bedroom and can break apart relationships (Nevid, Rathus, Rathus 2005), whether or not the sexual dysfunction is the root of the couples problems. The partner often feels it is their fault that the other cannot perform (Dunlap & Grosset, 1975). So what can be done to uplift these flaccid spirits? One common treatment of erectile dysfunction is drug therapy such as Viagra. At Viagra.com, the company states that it can help men of nearly any age increase blood flow to a man’s penis, thus “curing” the dysfunction. Though helpful to those who are only physically

unable to obtain an erection [secondary impotence (Johnson, Masters 1970)] it is only a short term fix. If the impotence is caused by poor diet or drugs then simply living healthy can cure impotence in many cases (Offit, 1977)2. The most effective cure is months if not (or more likely) years of counseling (Dunlap & Grosset, 1975). Masters and Johnsons state that “Impotence is not a naturally occurring phenomenon [except for those aging sexually active men]”. Thus impotence, in their opinion, has to be worked though psychologically (Johnson, Masters 1970). Masters and Johnsons suggested the most effective treatment was communication between partners3. Just establishing healthy communication between partners builds psychological support for each other, and often the erectile dysfunction is not related to the dysfunction, but rather another problem between the partners they have not talked about. The dysfunction is the physical response to whatever this communication failure is. Of course primary erectile dysfunction cannot be aided by this, however, as their problem is usually genetic or deeply ingrained psychological trauma that has to be worked out over years of therapy and/or drug treatment. Other treatments include; increasing knowledge of disorder, changing self-defeating attitudes, learning new sexual skills, trying different situations, and better communication while having sex4 (Nevid, Rathus, Rathus 2005). To summarize erectile dysfunction is a fairly common psychological problem, especially for aging men, and causes many interrelationship problems. Often it starts as anxiety over performance and becomes a psychologically crippling problem. It can transcend to every aspect of a male’s life. And though medication is 2

Who would guess hard drugs and bad health (sexual or otherwise) went hand-in-hand?

3

GASP!

4

Many couples simply live in discomfort than tell a partner what they enjoy or do not enjoy in bed.

the most common “cure”, counseling and healthy communication are the best ways to overcome this dysfunction. In conclusion, though this is a very common feared disorder that can greatly impact a man and his life, it is not usually a long term problem if treated early in a healthy psychological environment and the individual is educated about their problem. However for some it is a genetic disorder and must be identified and treated as a medical problem. So, the “cure” (more often than not) to impotence is not a battle of one man against time and aging, but a struggle of pride together with his partner (and of stepping out of the metaphorical sandbox into the larger world of adulthood and human sexuality).

Bibliography

Dunlap, & Grosset. “Male sexual performance.” (1975): 31-229. New York, NY. Johnson, V.E. & Masters, W.H. “Human sexual inadequacy.” (1970): 137-193. Boston, MA. Nevid, J.S. & Rathus, L.F. & Rathus, S.A. “Human sexuality in a world of diversity.” (2005): 490-518. Boston, MA. Offit, A.K. “The sexual self.” (1977): 117-245. Philadelphia, PA. Sharpe, T.H. & ed. McAnulty, R.D. & ed. Burnette, M.M. “Sex and sexuality; later life sexuality.” (2006): 133-151. Westport, CT.