Funny Sms

To live a life, one needs brains, reflex, perception, looks, IQ, knowledge, way of expression & many more mental qualities. Hats off 2 u coz u manage 2 live without them. If u hide, i'll seek 4 u. If u r lost, i'll search 4 u. If u'll leave, i'll wait 4 u. If days take u away 4m me, i'll fight 4 u. But, if u stop sending msgs, i'll kill you. Beta bola "papa papa mujhe bandar dekhna hai". Papa bole, "Nahi bete, abhi nahi". "Papa kyon ?" .......... "Bete abhi bandar SMS padh raha hai" I saw something in a shop window. It was stunning, cute, simply adorable. I was supposed 2 buy it 4 u, then I realised it was my reflection. Can u pronounce good english:- read along woof, roof, loof, shoof, shoof, woof, loof, roof, poof, woof woof, hoof, woof, roof, shoof. Test results: U r a good dog. Now stop barking. Once god came up 2 me & granted me a wish. I asked 4 "world peace". That's impossible, he said. Then I asked him 2 give u brains. He said "Let me try world peace" Shah Jahan Ne Taj Mahal Ki Har Deewar Ko Dekha, Har Meenar Ko Dekha, Har Kaleen Ko Dekha, Har Khidki Se Dekha... Aur Bola... Maa Kasam, Bahut Kharcha Ho Gaya !!! Falling in love is a sweet ambition, finding true love is a life time mission.. Take my word, follow the Indian tradition & marry ur dad's ugly decision ! Good looks catch the eyes but Good Personality catches the heart, You are blessed with both!. FLATTERED?. Don't Be, it was sent to me, I just wanted you to read it. From Mon to Sun, From Jan To Dec, From birth till my death, my feelings 4 u have never changed. For me, you've always been........... a headache ! 1 day u'll B srprisd 2C ME beside U. U & ME laughing, U & ME crying, U & ME dreaming, U & ME holding on, U & ME... just U & ME sitting in a MENTAL HOSPITAL & ME CHECKING U. I cannot hide this from u any more. I don't want 2 hurt u and I feel it's best if I tell u, before you hear it from someone else ............ Potato Prices Have Gone Up ! Could u fax me ur photo very very urgently ? Mind u - it's really very very urgent, damn serious and very imp ..... I'm playing cards and we've misplaced the JOKER. Maine puchha chand se "dekha hai kahin mere yaar sa hasin", chand ne kaha "saale itni upar se dikhta hai kya". If u save this msg, it means I'm cute. If u edit this, I'm still cute. If u fwd this, u r spreading that i'm cute & if u erase this, u r jealous of me coz i'm cute! Good morning...Have u done two of the most important things when you wake up today? 1)Pray, so that u may live... 2)Take a bath-so that others may live too! Friendship is like peeing in ur pants, everyone can see it but only you can feel it's warmth. This msg. will refresh your brain in 5 seconds. 5.... 4.... 3.... 2.... 1.... Error : No Brain Detected !! I mixed RUM in water and got drunk. I mixed BRANDY in water and got drunk. I mixed WHISKY in water and got drunk again. Now I have decided never to drink water again !!! Dark were those days, without your sight. When I was in darkness, you gave me light. You gave me strength 2 make life bright. Thank you so much PHILIPS TUBELIGHT !

Fun SMS Messages [ Page 2 ] I love "u", I love "u", I love "u", I love "u", I love "u", I love "u", I love "u". Hey! Don't get excited, I love other alphabets too...v, w, x, y, z ! Please remind me 2 remind U about reminding me to send U this reminder that reminds me of reminding U that U never have to remind me 2 remember U, I ALWAYS DO! I Love You. I Love You. I Love You. I Love You. I Love You. I Love You. I Love You. That's because Meneka Gandhi says "Love Animals" ! The animals of a jungle have decided to hold a meeting. The lion has come, the tiger has come, the elephant has come, the monkey has come.. But The meeting hasn't started. Guess why ? Because the Donkey is busy reading this SMS ! A - U'r Attractive B - U'r D Best C - U'r Cute D - U'r Dear 2 me E - U'r Excellent F - U'r Funny G - U'r Gud Looking H - He He He I - I'm J - Just K - Kidding Last nite I lay in bed, looking at the stars, the beautiful sky and the endless horizon.... and suddenly I thought... where the hell is my roof? You've got Sex Appeal... You've got Style... You've got Intelligence... You've got Class... You've got D Face... & You've got D Body... & I've got the wrong number! Sorry! This cat, is cat, a cat, good cat, way cat, to cat, keep cat, an cat, idiot cat, busy cat, for cat,20 cat, seconds cat !... Now read it without the word cat. God created the earth, God created the woods, God created you too, but yes, even God makes mistakes! Birdie birdie in the sky dropped a poopy in my eye, I don't worry I don't cry, I'm just happy that cows can't fly ! Roses are red, violets are blue, Frankenstein is ugly but what the hell happened to you???? Tusi bade gr8 ho, rsgule di pl8 ho, cok di cr8 ho, ande da oml8 ho, sms krne me bde la8 ho, jlebi di tra str8 ho. Par jo bhi ho, tusi mere fav8 ho Life without u is impossible. U r in my blood. Cannot stay for a sec without u. If there u aren't, I'm dead. Excuse me, I'm talking of oxygen. U r the one whose so smart,U r the one whose so charming, U r the one whose so caring,

U r the one whose so good looking. And, I'm the one who is spreading these rumors. I need you... I love you... I can't go anywhere without you... Oh my lovely... SHOES ! Intelligent Man + Intelligent Woman = Romance. Intelligent Man + Stupid Woman = Pregnancy. Stupid Man + Intelligent Woman = Affair. Stupid Man + Stupid Woman = Marriage ! Sincere Apology : If u dont like any of my SMS n dont like 2 read, then plz dont hesitate, feel free to..... Throw ur mobile. Jise dil diya woh dilli chali gayi, jise pyaar kiya woh Italy chali gayi. Khudkhushi karne chala, Zalim bijali ko haath lagaya, Bijali hi chali gayi. [ Credits : Richa ] What is true friendship ? U cry & I cry. U sad, I sad, U laughing, I laughing, U jump out of window... I look down... I am still laughing ! Your network tariff has changed. Call charges are now calculated according to brain size. The smaller the cheaper........ You can make free calls! [ Credits : Moin M ] Macchar ne jo kata... dil main mere junoon tha. Khujli hui itni... dil be sukoon tha. Pakada to chod diya yeh soch kar ki.... sale ki ragon main apna hi khoon tha ! [ Credits : Abhishek Bali ] Khuda kare tera mobile kho jaye. Mile mujhe aur mera ho jaye. Karu SMS ladkion ko naam tera aae. Maar tujhe pade aur kaleja mera thanda ho jae. [ Credits : Kamal Chopra ] Fun SMS Messages [ Page 3 ] Zindagi mein tum bahut aage jaaoge, kyonki jahan bhi tum jaooge, sab kahenge, chal be chal aage chal. Ha ha ha ha hha ha ha ha ha hha ha ho ho ho ho ho oh oh oh ooh ohh eh eh he he hhe he he hee he he hha ha ho ho ho ho he he he......... KUCH NAHIN BAS TUMHARI SHAKAL YAAD AA GAYI.... ha ha ha ha ho ho ho ho..... Bachelor's schedule... Monday ko dosti ; Tues ko pyar ; Wed ko shaadi ; Thus ko barbadi ; Fri ko fighting ; Sat ko talaq ; Sun ko rest, Mon ko phir se talash.... Q.Why did Santa Singh take off his clothes while writing exams? A. Coz it was written in the paper "Answer in brief" ! Every morning u r the 1st thing that comes 2 my mind. I wish I could start my day with U in my bed. I jus luv ur feel to my lips. U jus make my day. I love U NESCAFE The night is dark,the moon is high,i stop my car,u ask why? I come close 2 U, U feel shy, i tell u those 3 words..........Oh God ! Puncture ! Ikhtiyarre tabbasum ki lau ko tarranume numayish se aghaa dena... Jo iska matlab samajh aaye to please mujhe bhi bata dena..... Kya bindaas hawa chal raheli hai,birdy gana ga raheli hai,cow log grass eat raheli hai,shane log sms kar rahele hain aur dhakkan log sms padh rahele hain!!

Birds love you, monkeys love you, hippos love you, snakes love you, tortoise love you, giraffe loves you..... Please go back to ZOO, they all really miss U! Ur smile can be compared with Flowers, Ur voice can b compared with a cuckoo, Ur innocence can b compared with a baby, but in foolishness... You've got no comparisons ! Airhostes to Laloo : R U a vegetarian or non vegetarian Sir ? Laloo : I m a Saggitarian! Airhostes : Sir aap mansahari hain ya shakahari? Laloo : Hum BIHARI hain...! God saw u hungry, he created Domino's pizza. He saw u thirsty, he created Pepsi. He saw u in dark, he created light. He saw ME without problems, he created YOU ! 5 gr8 ppl: 1. Gandhiji-Woh to ab rahe nahin 2. Bajpai-Woh kisi kaam ke nahin 3. Aishwarya-apni pahoonch ke bahar hai. Baki rahe aap aur hum, so remain in touch. I'm getting married next month. There would be a small party and only a few people will be invited. Don't bring any gift. Just bring someone to MARRY ME ! Ur smile can be compared with Flowers, Ur voice can b compared with a cuckoo, Ur innocence can b compared with a baby, but in foolishness... You've got no comparisons ! Bhagwan se Scooter manga.. Car di; Ghar manga.. bangla diya; dost manga toh tumhey diya.. Bhagwan ne isbar aisa zulm kyoun kiya When I C the moon I C U, When I C the stars I C U, when I C the Sea I C U, get out of the way you are blocking my view. Ladka: Janeman is dil mein aaja. Ladki: Sandal nikalu kya? Ladka: Pagli mandir thode hi hai, aise hi aaja!! Yeh sms mein kitne taare hain, gino to: * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Iski to gayi, din mein taare gin raha hai!! Itna khubsurat kaise muskura lete ho.. itna kaatil kaise sharma lete ho.. kitni aasani se JAAN le lete ho.. kisine sikhaya hai ya bachpan se hi kamine ho!! Fun SMS Messages [ Page 4 ] You = cute ; You = hot ; You = sweet ; You = intelligent ; You = amazing ; You = perfect ; Me = liar. I have a confession to make, ever since I have known u, Its kinda hard for me to forget u. Every night u appear in my dreams.... And I find my self shouting..... BHOOT !!! BHOOT !!! I look at the stars, the stars r beautiful. Then I look at you...... I ...... I ....... I rather look at the stars again ! u r 100% beautiful, u r 100% lucky u r 100% sweet , u r 100% nice and u r 100% stupid to believe these words. A good speech should b like a women's skirt... Long enough to cover the subject, And short enough to create interest. Santa singh tells his girlfriend, "come home tomorrow, no one will b at home". When she goes the next day to his home....... There was NO ONE at home The rain makes all things beautiful, The grass & flowers 2, If rain makes all things beautiful, Why doesn’t it rain on you? This msg can only be read by a SEXY person: ................ Try again ...................... Sorry, i guess your just not sexy................... HEY! dont force it, ugly!!! If U sneeze once, Think I'm remembering you. If you sneeze twice, Think I want to Meet U. If U

sneeze thrice, Think I'm Missing You. 4th Time, Fool Take A Tablet ! I Pray to God to Bless you, guide you, save you, give you peace, joy and $1000000000. 50-50 OK ? You also pray ! Aahat si koi aye to lagta hai ki tum ho. Hawa koi lehrayi to lagta hai ki tum ho. Ab tum hi batao, kya tum kisi BHOOT se kam ho ? There are 8 ways to describe you... nice, friendly, so cute, loving, very sweet, funny, charming , thoughtful. In short, you're just like.... me ! Tu chandramukhi main surajmukhi, tu mujhse dukhi main tujhse dukhi. Chatt se chhalang laga de, phir tu bhi sukhi, main bhi sukhi. Why do U think I SMS u ? Is it because I care ? Or I miss u ? Or I love u ? Or I need You ? No ! It's b'coz... Timepass ke liye koi BAKRA chaiye ! Dream makes all things possible, Hope makes all things work, Love makes all things beautiful, Smile makes all the above work possible. So, always BRUSH YOUR TEETH ! Today is an international day for the mentally disabled. Please send an encouraging sms to a mentally disabled friend, as i just did.... Unlike others, ur brain is a masterpiece. it has 2 halves- the left & the right. The left has nothing right in it & d right has nothing left in it. [ Credits : Richa ] If i had gone 4 brain transplantation i have chosen ur brain b\'coz i want 2 use the brain that is never used b4. [ Credits : Richa ] What do U call a FAT Woman waiting for someone?........ MOTI-vating! [ Credits : Kalpesh ] Fun SMS Messages [ Page 5 ] I wanted to kill the sweetest, smartest and most beautiful person on this earth. But then, I thought........... Suicide is a crime ! Aaj didar, kal yaar, parso pyar, phir ekrar, aur phir-intzar, phir-takrar, phir-darar, saari mehnatbekar, aur akhir mein-Ek aur devdas at beer bar ! Q. What do you call a fat woman waiting for something ? Ans : MOTI-Vating ! Itna khubsurat kaise muskura lete ho..... Itna qatil kaise sharma lete ho..... Kitni aasani se Jaan le lete ho..... Kisi ne sikhaya hai ya bachpan se hi kamine ho ? Tohar chehra moti ke saman, Tohar chehra moti ke saman, Tohar chehra moti ke saman, Tohar chehra moti ke saman, Moti hamar kutte ka naam ! Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes...... After that,..... Who cares ?..... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes ! Gandhi bhi chala gaya, nehru bhi mar gaya, subhash bose ka bhi kuchh pata nahi, aur meri bhi tabiyat thik nahi hai.... pata nahi desh ka ab kya hoga. Arz kiya hai, Tere dar par sanam hazaar baar aayenge, Tere dar par sanam hazaar baar aayenge, Tere dar par sanam hazaar baar aayenge, Ghanti bajainge aur bhaag jayenge ! Zindagi mein teen cheezen kabhi bhi aa sakti hain..... PAISA..... MAUT..... Aur..... Aur..... Aur..... Mera SMS ! Maine poocha chand se... Kabhi dekha hai mere yaar sa hasin..... Chand bola.... 12036 entries found ! [ Credits : Unknown ] No matter how high the sky is.. How deep the ocean is.. How strong the wind is.. How wide a river

is.. I jst wanna tell u.. They r none of ur business ! [ Credits : Maryam Mahboob ] wudntufinditreallyannoyingifsomeoneuknewsentuamessagewithnospacesanduspentagestryingto figureoutonlytorealisethatthereisnopointtothemessageexcepttoirritateu!! [ Credits : Maryam Mahboob ] Hi! I am a virus & I am entering ur brain right now... Wait, hold on, Sorry, Unable to find ur brain.... I'm leaving now ! I saw you on the road that day. U were looking so fine. Ur face So divine. Ur walk so perfect. My heart started tossing a sweet song.... Who let the dogs out ??! Gorgeous, intelligent, kind, sweet, charming, witty, hilarious, friendly....... Well, enough of me.... How about you ? Santa Singh once went out to a movie from 9 to 12 but came out from the hall at 10. Why ?? Because, the name of the movie was DASTAK ! What do I do when I see someone extremely Gorgeous, Attractive, Terrific, Cute, Fabulous.... I Stare, I smile, And, when I get tired..... I put down the mirror ! Arz kiya hai, Door se dekha to sntra tha, pass jake dekha to sntra tha, chil ke dekha to bhi sntra tha, Khake dekha to bhi sntra tha. Wah kya sntra tha ! [ Credits : Parag Kotecha ] Laloo goes to america for learning english. After some days George Bush calls the Rabri Devi & told her " E sasoora angreji nahin seekh sakat hai." [ Credits : Parag Kotecha ] I have bought new camera, So please smile..... Click !..... Sorry bhoot ka photo nahin aata. [ Credits : Parag Kotecha ]

Fun SMS Messages [ Page 6 ] Indian & Pakistami soldiers r on the border. But surprised they r not fighting ! Do u know wy ? Coz dhishum dhishum to pepsodent ka kaam hai na ! ! ! [ Credits : Parag Kotecha ] Johny Walker : Mere pass bangla hai, gadi hai, bank loker hai, Kya hai tumhare pass ? Johny Leaver : Mere pass in sabki chabi hai ! [ Credits : Parag Kotecha ] Ek tum ho ki kitne acche ho, 1 tum ho ki kitne pyare ho, 1 tum ho ki kitne sunder ho, 1 tum kitne sacche ho, 1 hum hai ki jhooth bolte ja rahe hain. [ Credits : Sandeep Pathak ] Can U believe things ppl do??!! I was sitting next to a guy in Mandir, In the middle of the aarti, he lit a cigarette. I was so shocked, I nearly dropped my beer! [ Credits : Sandeep Pathak ] Kash tumhare chere pe chicken-pox ke daag hote, Kash tumhare chere pe chicken-pox ke daag hote, chand to tum ho hi, sitare bhi saath hote!! [ Credits : Sandeep Pathak ] Kisses blown r kisses wasted, kisses r not kisses unless they are tasted, kisses spread germs gersm are hated ,so kiss me baby iam vaccinated ! [ Credits : Ankit Thakur ] Santa Singh Ji Zebra Crossing ke Black & White Patte par Bar Bar idhar se Udhar chalte the , Woh kya soch rahe honge ? THINK ???? "SALA YEH PIYANO BAJTA KYO NAHI ??" [ Credits : Jaldeep Dave ] Recent studies have revealed that idiots use their thumbs to scroll through their text messages. Don't change to your finger.... it's too late.... idiot ! Recent News Headlines : Softdrinks Contain Dangerous Pestcides. Insan to newspaper padh sakte hain par janwaro ka kya hoga kyonki.... Aaj kal CHEETAH BHI PEETA HAI ! [ Credits : Richa Gupta ] Suraj Hua Madham , chand bhi chalne laga, mein thehra raha, zamin chalne lagi, sajna kya yehi pyaar hai ?? Nalayak, yeh pyar nahi EARTHQUAKE hai ! BHAAG ! [ Credits : Richa Gupta ]

Osama Bin Laden's favourite song : " mainnikla, plane leke, o raste mein, newyork mein, ik mod ayamein W.T.C. tod aaya... " [ Credits : Richa Gupta ] Jab Jab tum angdai lete ho dam hamara nikal jata hai. Aye Jalim Deodrant lagane me tumhara kya jata hai ?! [ Credits : Vikram Gulati ] unki gali se guzar rahe the kya ittefaq tha, unki gali se guzar rahe the kya ittefaq tha, unhoon ne phool phainka par gamla bhi saath tha ! [ Credits : Akshay Mehta ]