"committed" By A.r. Kirby -- Episode 16: "the Man In The Mountain"

COMMITTED by A.R. Kirby

Episode 16 The man in the mountain

“Ralph! Hey Ralph!” Brandon could barely hear the old man’s yell; his attention was firmly fixed on the mass of snarling fangs, flared, wet nostrils, and cold, killing eyes directly in front of his face. He pressed his head even harder against the wall, attempting to get as far away as possible from the massive puma. “Ralph! Buddy!” Vernon again. What was the old man doing? Brandon let out a pained yelp as the cat’s claws punctured the flesh on his left shoulder. Nobody heard him. Vernon walked closer to the lone seated figure in the middle of the room. “Ralph,” he said quietly. “It’s me, Vernon. Talk to me, old man.” The seated man stirred slightly, his meditative serenity broken. He slowly turned his head toward Vernon. “Oh, man... uh... hey! Vernon! What’s up?” “Not much,” Vernon said quietly, placing his hand on Ralph’s shoulder. “You okay?”

Committed by A.R. Kirby “Oh yeah, I’m fine. Been through some really heavy stuff lately, but I’m good.” Ralph swung himself around so that he was facing Vernon, though he was still sitting cross-legged on the floor. He looked up at Vernon earnestly. “Vern, it’s really good to see you, man. What’s going on? “Well, for one thing, your familiar is about to eat my help,” Vernon said, jerking a thumb towards where the big cat pinned Brandon to the wall. He lowered himself to a seated position in front of Ralph. “Can you turn off the security system?” “What?” Ralph asked, scratching his head. He looked over Vernon’s shoulder to see Brandon wincing against the puma’s attack. A flicker of recognition crossed Ralph’s face. “Oh, yeah, sure, sure. Sorry about that, dude,” he called toward Brandon while nodding at the puma. The big cat dematerialized into tiny black balls of fur. They slowly floated outward until a mystic breeze, carrying the whispers of ancient Anasazi and smelling of sage, appeared from nowhere and scattered the particles. As soon as the pieces of cat were gone, Brandon’s shoulder -- still bleeding profusely despite Brandon’s best attempts to put pressure on the wound -- healed itself. Brandon slid down the wall and sat in amazement, wondering where the cat went. It quickly occurred to him that he didn’t really care where it went; he was just incredibly happy that it was gone. He rubbed his now pain-and-fang-free shoulder, trying to figure out exactly what had just happened. Then he felt a different kind of pain; his head ached and veins in his forehead throbbed. It took a moment for Brandon to collect himself, but he quickly realized that he was truly and incredibly pissed off. “WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?”

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Episode 16 Vernon glanced back to see Brandon glaring at the two men sitting in the center of the room. The older associate turned back towards Ralph and began rummaging through his day pack. “That what?” Vernon asked nonchalantly. “Oh, come on!” Brandon said, rising from his spot against the wall. “That cat!” he yelled. “The universe!” Brandon strode angrily to where Vernon sat and continued to search for some still-elusive object hidden in the bottom of the pack. “Don’t try to out-cool me, old timer!” Brandon said forcefully as he stood over the two men, gesturing wildly, his voice rising as he spoke. “One second, I’m climbing up stairs in the middle of a rock. I walk into a room and what happens? I find all of creation in the room with me! But no! That’s not enough! There’s more! One second later, the universe disappears and a freakin’ lion tries to eat me!” “Wasn’t a lion,” Vernon said, as he fished out the paper bag he got at the gas station. “Puma. I think it was a puma, anyway. Right, Ralph? Now sit down and shut up. I told you to be ready for anything. You were warned.” Much as it had done earlier during their memory conversation in the Bronco, Vernon’s hand whipped out so quickly as to be almost unseen. A moment later, Brandon was flat on his back and staring at the ceiling, trying to catch his breath. “Okay, now maybe we can get on with this,” Vernon said. Brandon heard Ralph say, “Aw, man, you shouldn’t have,” followed by the sound of rustling brown paper. The junior associate pulled himself to a seated position next to Vernon and 3

Committed by A.R. Kirby took his first good look at the man named Ralph. A dark-skinned, muscular arm dug into the bag, pulling out various treasures and placing each item carefully on the ground in front of him. He had long hair, smooth and black, that was pulled into a ponytail. His face was ageless and chiseled; Brandon couldn’t tell if he was 30 years old or 300. The face creased in a smile as Ralph placed yet another item, and his piercing, deep brown eyes gleamed with some unknown pleasure. Brandon noticed that Ralph’s bare feet were large with thick, rough callouses on the soles. They stuck out from the ends of a pair of blue nylon jogging pants with bright yellow stripes down the sides, and Ralph’s long legs and thick, muscular calves made the jogging pants look almost like leggings. He was shirtless, and his bare, hairless chest was muscular and shaped like a barrel. If there was to be trouble ahead, Brandon thought, he’d be wellserved to take up a spot directly behind this Navajo man-mountain. With a satisfied grunt, Ralph sat upright and looked approvingly upon his handiwork. He had arranged the items from the paper bag -- a collection consisting of a half-dozen Slim Jims, two cans of Vienna sausages, a single can of deviled ham, two small packages of Saltines, and three bottles of Yoo Hoo -- so that when viewed from above, they created a large smiley face with buck teeth. “Yep, it was a puma,” Ralph said, grabbing one of the cans of Vienna sausages and leaving the configuration in front of him with a single eye. He pulled back the ring and the can opened with a hiss. “Oh man, Vernon, this is the best. Thanks so much,” he said, pulling two franks out of the can and stuffing them into his mouth. A little sausage jelly escaped from the corner of his lips as he chomped. “Dude, you have no idea how much I need this,” he mumbled through his stuffed mouth as he reached for one of the packages of crackers and tore it open.

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Episode 16 “Well, I thought you might need a little something to pick you up,” Vernon said, smiling. Brandon sat with a disgusted look on his face. “I can’t see how you can eat that stuff,” the junior associate said, still smarting from his fall. “There’s nothing natural in there. It’s disgusting.” “Yeah, I know,” Ralph replied, blowing small bits of saltine out of his mouth as he spoke. “But a good long vision quest takes it out of ya, I mean for real. Gotta get some protein in your belly afterwards, and there’s nothing better for it than Vienna sausages and Slim Jims.” “Vision quest? So this is all about some kind of crazy ritual?” Brandon’s voice was impatient. Vernon shot him a stern glance. “Ralph, I’m sorry. You’ve got to excuse the new guy here,” Vernon said. “Getting out in the field for the first time seems to have made Associate Mays here forget his manners.” “Aw, it’s no problem,” Ralph said, leaning forward and extending a hand to Brandon. “I’m forgetting myself, too, but I guess it’s to be expected. I really didn’t know I was going to have company today. Anyway, I’m Ralph Longarrow. What’s your name, dude?” Brandon took Ralph’s hand and shook it firmly. “Junior Associate Brandon Mays.” “So you’re mixed up with the Collective, huh?” Ralph leaned back and grabbed one of the bottles of chocolate drink. “Vernon get after you about his memory training? He’s crazy about that stuff.”

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Committed by A.R. Kirby “It’s damned important,” Vernon protested. “Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Ralph said, and took a large swig of Yoo Hoo. Brandon relaxed a little. He was starting to like this strange man with all the meat products. “So to answer your question,” Ralph said, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, “ritual, sure. Crazy... well, that’s up for discussion.” “I guess you would think it was kinda crazy, though, right? I mean, universe, puma and all that,” he went on, speaking directly to Brandon. “And I’m real sorry about what happened with Kitty while ago. She was just looking out for me. You all right?” “Just a little shaken up,” Brandon said. “I’ll be all right. First time I’ve ever been near a big cat, and I hope I never see another one. Thought I was screwed when those claws went into my shoulder. I was bleeding like crazy! What happened?” “Yeah, well, Kitty is my spirit animal,” Ralph said. “She helps take care of me. She’s a wonderful cat. I can be pretty vulnerable when I’m on a vision quest -- I get so far out there, I don’t even know what’s happening with my physical self -- so she pops up if she thinks I might be in danger.” “Spirit animal? It seemed real enough.” “Oh, you bet your ass she’s plenty real,” Ralph said, and reached for one of the Slim Jims. He tore open the package and bit off a sizable hunk from the end. “She’s as real as you or me.” “Well, no offense, but I’m glad she’s gone.” “Yeah, well, she’s not really gone. She’s just back in her spirit form. Look.” Ralph gestured toward the edge of the room, and Brandon could see an ethereal outline of the great cat, 6

Episode 16 calmly cleaning one of its paws. He instinctively started to scoot backward. “You got nothing to worry about, man,” Ralph said reassuringly. “Now she knows you’re cool, and it’s all good. Seriously.” “So, back to the Ancient Ones,” Ralph said, now reaching for the can of deviled ham and cracking it open. “It had been a while since I’d talked to Spider Woman and the twins, so I decided it was a good time for a vision quest.” “How long have you been up here?” Vernon asked while he watched Ralph double-dip a saltine into the potted meat. “Dunno,” Ralph replied. “What day is it?” “Friday,” Brandon said. “June 12,” Vernon added helpfully. “Wow,” Ralph said, and finished off the first Yoo Hoo. “I started on Valentine’s Day. No wonder I’m hungry.” He reached for another Slim Jim and ripped open the plastic. Brandon shot Vernon a questioning glance. Vernon’s slight nod confirmed that Ralph really had been inside this rock for four months. The two men sat quietly while Ralph finished chewing the sausage stick. “So anyway, I went on the vision quest,” Ralph said quietly, “and talked to the Ancient Ones. They were real vague, man, but they’ve always been that way. They’re so freakin’ symbolic. Sometimes it’s a real pain in the ass to figure out what they really mean. “Long story short, all they could tell me was that great and terrible things are about to happen. Those are the words they used: 7

Committed by A.R. Kirby ‘great and terrible’. Would’a been nice if they had been a little bit more specific. But I suppose that’s what brings you two here, right? Following up on the great and terrible? Has something happened that I need to know about?” “Not hardly,” Vernon said, and his voice relayed his disappointment. “It’s just a routine investigation. Mays here found himself an energy fluctuation; unfortunately, most all the associates on the continent are at survival training, so I get to go with junior here and find out what made the power surge. “On the other hand, I think it would make for a pretty good road trip,” Vernon went on, starting to collect the leavings from Ralph’s convenience-store feast. “We’re headed down South; might even be able to hit the beach for a couple of days while we’re there. I figured you might want to tag along. We could use an extra pair of hands.” “Hell yeah!” Ralph said, and let out a bellowing hoot. He rose to his feet and brushed some crumbs from his thighs. “Why not? I got nothing going on here. I could use a little sunshine. I completely missed spring, ya know. Give me ten minutes and we’ll get outta here.” To be continued...

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