Aug Oct2009 Limericks

Saturday Sports Limerick - 1st August 2009 The boks are ready for a NZ comeback Tiger’s 63 keeps him on track Strauss and Bell keep England in the game Swimmer Steffan stakes her claim The Cheetahs don’t survive a Shark attack

Monday Sports Limerick - 3rd August 2009 The Bokke crush the All Blacks into defeat The Buick open, Tiger turns on the heat Since Bradman, Ponting’s rated the best Zandberg wins semi’s and shows no stress Owen’s move to Manchester proves real sweet!

Thursday News Limerick - 6th August 2009 Vaccine makers pull all the stops Cele wants firepower for all his cops Tax refunds held back by SARS And still more ministers buy fancy cars The Rand against the Dollar drops!

Friday News Limerick - 7th August 2009 Zuma says “Cargate will stop!” A shaky rand continues to drop Eskom propose a strike next week Swine flu in schools looks rather bleek Ngcobo’s in – Hlophe gets the chop!

Tuesday Sports News Limerick - 11th August 2009 Dale Steyn fails a doping test Aussie Mortlock told to take a rest Schumi calls off his awaited comeback Tiger wins and stays on track Federer No 1 and still the best!

Wednesday RSA News Limerick - 12th August 2009 Eskom's workers stay at work Drug smuggling in SA has gone beserk Is Sheik healthy? Who really knows swine flu cases in SA grows the rand improves, is that a perk?

Thursday World News Limerick - 13th August 2009 Deadly clashes in Phillipines An Iphone shatters, and injures teens Iran denies prison rape claims typhoons in Taiwan and heavy rains TV schooling due in France, it seems!

Monday's Sport Limerick - 17th August 2009 Usain Bolt stuns with another great run Tiger Woods is finally outdone Chelsea and United face away tests Pollock says one day’s are still the best Wallabies must step up, that’s no pun!

Thursday SA News Limerick - 20th August 2009 Gauteng’s king of bling is now in court Semenya’s gold is good for sport The Metrorail strike just carries on Men attack woman, Hey! That’s not on! Soccer stars murder date set in court.

Friday News Limerick - 21st August 2009 Swine flu is being seen to spread Somalia fighting brings 40 dead The Lockerbie bomber is free to go Semenya’s race was quite a show “Not safe in SA” or so it’s said!

Monday News Limerick - 24st August 2009 The fires in Athens are still ablaze England win the ashes and deserve lots of praise The Rand is looking a little stronger Habana’s not a bull much longer Proteas are No1 – happy days!

Wednesday News Limerick - 26st August 2009 Ruby guilty of husband killing Undertaker appears in dock – “how chilling!” A real problem with SA Health Will Semenya enjoy real wealth? Manure to power SA? How thrilling!

Thursday News Limerick - 27th August 2009 Two young boys rescued off a ship The rand against dollar takes a very slight dip Mxit’s an easy route to crime Protestors damage cars – that’s out of line! Hlophe’s son is under the whip!

Monday's Sport Limerick - 31th August 2009 Federer is still the number one The Boks win in Perth – that’s Well Done! Ernie’s pipped by a Slocum putt Everton win and are out of a rut Hussey against Scotland hits a tremendous ton!

Tuesday's SA News Limerick - 1st September 2009 Spring is here except in the Cape Joburg taxi’s are back in shape The NW province is crippled with fraud A teen shot dead by a security guard Petrol goes up – there’s no escape!

Friday's SA News Limerick - 4th September 2009 A Pretoria taxi driver to hear his fate Can the Aussies beat SA or is it too late A 10 year old killed in a bicycle crash A robber shoots himself – how rash ! The rand’s been strong against the dollar of late!

Monday's News Limerick - 7th September 2009 The Boks were beaten at their very old own game The All Blacks might be hard to tame A sad farewell to Vanilla Nurse Bank fees are high – hold on to your purse! Germay beat Bafana – no one’s to blame!

Tuesday's News Limerick - 8th September 2009 “Just leave us alone” say Pres Mugabe Tired Aus doctors told to drink lots of coffee Bakkies says he likes to see pain The rand vs dollar shows some really strong gain Premier says “Italians want to be me”!!

Thursday's News Limerick - 10th September 2009 A pigeon beats Telkom, how about that! The IAAF and Semenya need to chat Santana says the future is bright A blast at Springs factory – that’s not right! All blacks vs Bokke – it’s tit for tat!

Friday's Sport Limerick - 11th September 2009 Caister withdraws from a 4km race Bolt loses to tot but doesn’t lose face The boks in New Zealand are raring to go The Kiwi’s batting a tale of woe Liverpool are still in the premier league chase!

Tuesday News Limerick - 15th Sept 2009 Carl Lewis blames the ASA The dirty dancer is on his way Missing toilets raise a stink The bokke are the best – what do you think? The rag trade is in disarray

Wednesday's News Limerick - 16th Sept 2009 Thousands of calls to Zuma’s hotline Is our crime now on the decline? A teen is hurt in a quad bike crash Tshwane metro council and residents clash “Lets defeat racism”, the ANC whine!

Thursday's News Limerick - 17th September 2009 Wits protests – the police called in Mom united with child again Zuma says the provinces will stay Western Cape school safety in disarray Power cuts in schools – you cannot win!!

Friday's News Limerick - 18th September 2009 The Proteas are favourites for the ICC cup Semenya in training – is her time up? SAA feel strain on the Airbus deal Can Zuma help Benni? Let’s please get real! A record 360kg heroin haul – Yup Yup

Tuesdays's News Limerick - 6th Oct 2009 Jackie Selebi is on trial today A R100 million home in Bantry Bay Prisoners are rescued from a court fire Thieves rob a farmer and open fire Safina’s out and helps Venus lead way!

Wednesday's News Limerick - 7th Oct 2009 Is Selebi “finished and klaar”? Ambulances vanish? It’s bizarre! New farmers just want land Is Zuma’s hotline a little bland? Toyota shows it’s sexy sportscar!

Thursday's News Limerick - 8th Oct 2009 Barbie guilty and didn’t say sorry Time to quit smoking or should we worry? Police minister’s hotel stay is quite a scandal Teezers ad is too hot to handle Should Selebi be sorry or even worry?

Friday's Sport limerick - 9th Oct 2009 Will Santana finally fall? JP’s Cobra’s are on the ball Serena ready to play Fed Cup Percy a wife-beater? “Hey, what’s up?” And Griquas face an all Bok brawl!

Mondays's News Limerick - 12th Oct 2009 Baron out of Iceland game Aussie rugby is not the same Muliaina gets extended leave Santana needs a trick up his sleeve Province without Schalk won’t be the same!

Tuesdays's News Limerick - 13th Oct 2009 Now Manual gets a fancy car Police killing a woman is going too far Is it time for Santana to go? A Plett couple murdered, Oh No, Oh No! Stormy Cape weather – It’s quite bizarre!

Thursdays News Limerick - 15th Oct 2009 Thousands are flocking to the Western Cape SA hospitals are not in good shape Pirates are killed in a boat attack A cancer survivor bravely fights back After 40 years, a trail of rape!

Mondays News Limerick - 19th Oct 2009 Mcbide’s lawyer slams the state The bulls and the cheetahs have a final date Intern murder “a mistake!!” Presidential pardon for Shabir Shaik? 4 shop owner murderer’s await their fate!

Wednesdays News Limerick - 21th Oct 2009 3 hospitalised after Joburg fire The tragic death of a Cape high flier A toddler locked up for 14 hours Netshitenzhe quits his president powers A woman, child murdered – that’s rather dire!

Tuesdays news limerick - 27th Oct 2009 Pupils hurt in Chlorine blast The Bulls vs Cheetahs is hard to forecast Diplomat resigns over Afgan war It’s in the court dock for the “Reitz” four The Kiwi’s need a coach – and fast