Naughty Sms

kid asked:"Why dad & mum R in their room since 5days?" Sister:"I don't know but why r u laughing?" Kid:"Dad asked for 'VASELINE' And I gave him 'FEVICOL'

Sonu: Papa jab aap Honeymoon pe gaye the tab mein kahan tha? Dad: Putar, jaate waqt tu mere paas tha aur aatey waqt mummy ke paas. WHY is a Lecturer Greater as compared to a Mother.? Bcause a mother can put only 1 child to sleep, but… A lecturer cAn put the Whole clAss to sleep….! kanjoos 1: I’m very kanjoos, I went 2 honeymoon alone & saved 1/2 money. kanjoos 2: You r nothing I saved all my money, my friend was going & I sent my wife with him

Husband: kash hamare ladki ki jagah ladka ho jata? Wife: Chhodo ji, agar main aapke bharose rehti, to ladki bhi nahi hoti

Man Teases his ex-wife's new husband: So, dude how was the second-hand stuff? New husband: Not bad. After the first 3 inches, she was brand new.

Wife going to USA Wife:Do u want anything from USA? Husband: Yeah, an english girl Wife returns from USA Husband:where's my gift? Wife:wait for 9 months

He met a lady while browsing. She unzipped his dotcom when downloading. Since he was virus free he slotted his floppy disk into her hotmail she screamed yahoo!

A kids ask an Old man: Wut book r u reading sir? Old man! History book. Kid! But that a Sex Book. Old man! For me its History.

A prostitute's nursery rhyme: One two lets screw, Three four I'm a whore, Five six s#ck the dick, Seven eight ejaculate, Nine ten f#ck me again.

What is pure Hindi name of Condom?? Rubber ki Chiknai yukt Prajanan virodhak mardana Ling ki topi.

No teacher in class Principal entered in class an asked angrily: Kis ka period chal raha hai?? 4 larkian sharmatay hue sir hamara

Sardar : Yar meri biwi pani se bohat darti hai. Friend : Acha wo kaise? Sardar : Yar kal mein ghar gaya to wo bathtub mai bhi security guard k sath bethi thi.!! Boy: I like the soft thing behind your braiz. Girl: what?

Boy: your heart. Girl: I love the big thing between your two legs. Boy: what? Girl: your bike..;-)

A man was lost alone on an island. One day he decide to build a wooden boat. Suddenly a girl comes and man used the wood for making bed. Moral: A girl can change your aim! ;p