Issue 14

The Caper Times

Volume 30, Issue 14

April 8th, 2009

As This School Year Comes To A Close, Another is On The Horizon In This Issue: CBUSU Report Card (pg 2) Talking Politics With the Youth Prime Minister (pg 3) Saving CBC (pg 5) Conclusion to “Our Destination Counts” (Pg 9) And Much More!!! The Caper Times would like to thank all of its readers for their continued support. The Caper Times will be returning next year, in September, 2009. Good Luck on exams to students, and we’ll see you next year! The Caper Times is: Editor-in-Chief: Chris Lawrence Associate Editor: Griffyn Chezenko

Business Manager: Marisha Bandaratilaka Distribution Manager: Misty McPhee

Writers: Eileen Coole Ryan Hynes Suzanne MacNeil Kenny McClean Brittany Harnum Brittany Mullins

The opinions expressed in this paper are not necessarily the opinions of CBUSU or the Caper Times Editorial Board. If you do not agree with something in this paper, then do something about it. This is a student and community paper, and both the university and local community are encouraged to be heard. Have something that needs to be said or just want to say something? Contact the Caper Times at [email protected].

The Caper Times

2008-2009 Cape Breton Students’ Union –A Report Card By: Kenny McClean What’s a job without performance reviews to look forward to? Nothing says “thanks for all your hard work”, like someone picking at the flaws in your tenure. Without further ado, let’s get down to it. Budget – B As far as I know, the Student’s Union has enough money to exist next year, so that’s a point in their favour. Most University services and groups run at a deficit (See: The Pit), so it’d be unfair to tear into them for it. CBU isn’t a big school, and we don’t get money thrown at us like some of the bigger schools do, so I’d say the

Letter To The Editor

On April 1st, 2009, Cape Breton University was lucky to have NASCO Executive Director Jim Jones speak about his history in the student co-operative movement and how CBU could benefit from such a project. NASCO is the North American Students of Cooperation organization that works with student cooperatives all over the continent. Jim has been an integral player in NASCO’s operation and has helped open and keep thousands of student cooperatives thriving. Jim noted that student co-operatives usually arise out of a desire to meet a common need; these needs can vary from university to university, according to student demographic. To date, CBU does not really have a solid base of off campus housing options

SU did the best they could with what they had. Communication – C Name me the Communications Coordinator, and then name me something she communicated. Stephanie Bagnell isn’t to blame here, however; rather, the apathy of the student body is the culprit. Most of you didn’t CARE what the press releases had to say, and it wasn’t Stephanie’s job to run around waving releases in your face, making sure you were up to date. Even more so, it’s hard for a Communications Coordinator to do her job when nobody is communicating.

available to its students, but a student run co-operative could solve these problems for students looking for affordable housing. Jim highlighted the fact that student co-operatives begin with the students; not with university administration, not with organizations or committees, but with students who want to group together to reap the benefits of cooperative living. Jones highlighted that many student cooperatives benefit from cheaper rent due to specific leasing agreements made with landlords - many students will put into the lease that they will take care of the house maintenance, and in turn, the landlord will cut them a deal on the rental costs. Other cooperatives pay similar rent to everyone else, but save money when the whole house purchases food as a group; this can keep their food costs down

Services - B Services include Tutoring, The Pit, Mine Games, Caper Convenience, etc. As I said, it’s expected that most of these will run at a deficit, this is to be expected. Sure, The Pit might as well have been a black hole that Matt Stewart threw $20,000 into, but at least it was well run, and usually open. It doesn’t help that things like the Student’s Union Van get billed under The Pit. Aside from pub crawls, the various campus societies didn’t seem to do much. This IS Cape Breton, and pub crawls are the local sport of choice, so perhaps that’s all that is mandated for a society at CBU. As far as equality goes, the Diversity Center and the Women’s Center got funding equal to everyone else (as is only right); there’s little more to say on the is-

drastically. Every cooperative is different, but what ties them all together is that students come together to work cooperatively for a cause, whether that is saving money, or sharing an experience together while attending university. Jim Jones has been working with student co-operatives his whole professional life. Mr. Jones was optimistic about a student cooperative for CBU, noting the strong ties our community has with cooperative movements, through Father Jimmy Tompkins and Rev. Dr. Moses Coady with the Antigonish movement. Jim Jones heads to Washington, D.C. on the 6th of May to be inducted into the Cooperative Hall of Fame, for his lifelong achievements as a cooperative mentor and leader. -by David MacVicar

sue. In any case, the services ran as they should: no more, no less. Overall – C It’s easy to pick and poke at the people running the show, but the job isn’t easy. There have been years that have gone much less smoothly, with a Student’s Union much less approachable and dedicated. It wasn’t an exceptional year, but that can be good, as well as bad. Matt, Ricky, Michael, and Mike all did a fine job in their respective positions, and I’m confident that Ricky and Francis will do just as well next year. All things considered, I give the 2008-2009 Cape Breton Student’s Union a grade of C. It was a B, but then Mike Mackenzie crashed the Student’s Union Van into it.

A Note From The Editor: Since this is my last issue as EIC of the Caper Times, I would like to thank all of our readers for their continued support and contributions. This is a community paper, and I have tried my best to represent as many parts of this community as I could. My job as editor may have ended, but I will continue to contribute for as long as I can. I hope that you, the reader will too. My experiences, both good and bad with the Caper Times will never be forgotten. I have you, my readers, and my exceptional staff to thank for that. Sincerely, Chris Lawrence, Editor-In-Chief, Vol. 30

Photo:Chris ChrisLawrence//CT Lawrence//CT Photo:

Page 2 // News

April 8th, 2009

News // Page 3

lot better than how we deal with it now. I know it’s provincially regulated, but the Federal Government can play a larger role on the issue. “ CIements cited the cuts to GST by two percentage points. “One [percentage point] could have covered all tuition…we could be significantly reducing tuition costs.” When asked what issues he thought were most important to young Canadians, Clements first brought up the issue of the environment. “The environment’s always a big one, mainly because that issue will be our responsibility ,” referring to youth as the heirs of the state of the environment. “ The decisions that are made now will ultimately have an impact on how we live our lives and how we’ll respond to these issues in the future.” Clements again acknowledged the financial crisis as a matter of growing concern worldwide. “We’ll also have a look at the Youth Criminal Justice Act, how that’s being decided in the near future”. Clements also

reaffirmed the importance of the state of postsecondary education. When asked his opinion on the December 2008 parliamentary dispute, Clements stated that in his position, he is obliged to be unbiased towards partisan issues facing Canadian governance. “It was something that was unprecedented, but it was something that brought more Canadians into politics. To see a coalition government formed just after an election. “, remarked Clements on the historical dispute that nearly toppled the Conservativeled government, and would have seen Canada lead by a Liberal-NDP Coalition with the Bloc Quebecois party in support of the coalition. Clements acknowledged that the event served to heighten interest in Canadian politics after a federal election that saw one of the lowest voter turnouts in history. When asked why there is declining interest in the political process, Clements shared the following insight: “[We are] losing faith in leaders, we see that things are promised and aren’t getting accomplished, and even thing do get accomplished,

some people don’t realize they’re getting done.” Excitement south of the border in the US presidential election made a difference in interest levels, Clements reflected. “There was the American election, and there were probably more Canadians interested in that than our own election. You had two candidates, not just Obama but even McCain, going head to head, but who both understood what had to be done and were both bringing hope and promise, and that’s why there was such a high voter turnout.” In comparing the process in the US with our own, Clements said “We had all these leaders [during the election period] going back and forth, and I think they really need to understand that bringing in more hope and promise will get us to trust our political leaders again. I think we need to see prominent leaders stand up and advocate what needs to be done. Clements said that youth are encouraged to get in contact with him personally, at [email protected], and to visit the Youth Government of Canada’s website at www.ygc-gjc.ca

piling software, we reached our goal. The website that we created is basically helping students with difficulties in the English language. Although it seems like we are targeting university students, we’re really aiming this project for any student having trouble with writing essays, spelling and anything of that sort. Our website http://itec. cbu.ca/language/ contains links to software that can help students with these very issues, and especially on a university level. It addresses academic topics

such as writing, research, APA and MLA citation, and plagiarism. We also have links to translators and dictionaries, which will help students better understand meanings of words and phrases. Now most of this software is available all over the Internet I agree, but the goal of the website has been achieved, which is bringing it all in one place. The students can visit this website and get all the information and use it on the spot, instead of searching all over the Internet, and going off

track. We would like to thank the Reading and Writing Centre and Student Union for their support, as well as the BTI faculty. Hopefully, this website helps us move towards our ultimate goal which is letting students feel like school shouldn’t be such a hard time. This may seem like just a graduation project now, but we hope to make it something big and useful for the upcoming students of Cape Breton University.

Talking Politics with Canada’s Youth Prime Minister By Suzanne MacNeil CBU arts student Andrew Clements had a whirlwind exposure to Canadian Politics in his first few months as Youth Prime Minister, but took a few moments to share some political insights with the Caper Times. Clements held his identity as a Cape Bretoner and Atlantic Canadian in high esteem during his campaign “I understand that [Atlantic Canada] is quite underrepresented in federal politics. I wanted to make sure our voices were heard and our values represented,” though he stressed that as youth prime minister, he must represent the voices of youth an all areas of Canada. When contemplating Atlantic Canada’s standing amongst the other provinces, Clements noted that the difficulties we face, in his opinion, come down to geography and population. “When you look at Atlantic Canada as opposed to the west, the population is astronomically different. Or even Atlantic Canada to Ontario,”

noting the number of federal ridings each region has. Clements noted that the Atlantic Provinces face challenges with their economy. “When you look over in Alberta, they were doing well with oil and in Ontario they had the auto industry. It’s kind of difficult for us, location wise, to do anything besides fisheries and forestry.” The recent financial crisis, Clements noted, did have its impact on the stronger economies within Canada, and would have its effect on the youth of the country. “ [The crisis] will play a big part in our responsibilities, we’re the ones who will be paying for our university, the people who will be going into these job sectors when we graduate.” Clements said that how the government responds now will have a huge impact on youth’s future. As a university student, Clements shared his thought on the state of Post-secondary education in Canada. “We’re really expensive [in terms of] postsecondary education. I think we can deal with it a

Letter to the Editor As fourth year students, soon to graduate from the Business Technology department in Cape Breton University, we were assigned the task of creating a language improvement website. This sounded like a great idea, and I was honestly enthusiastic about the whole deal. Our group Tidjane Cherif, Mariam Erian, Youssef Hassan, Chen Rui Xiong and I are all international students and we all speak more than one language. So we know

what it’s like when students face difficulties forming sentences and trying to get their point across in a language other than their own. Diversity is growing here in Cape Breton and the need for a unified language is more than a personal need. The idea of the project was outlined last semester, and this semester under Danny Yakimchuk’s supervision, the site was finally completed. After endless hours of planning, researching and com-

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Yasmin Osman

Page 4 // Opinions Humanities funding too undefined: critics By Rory MacLean The Sheaf (University of Saskatchewan) SASKATOON (CUP) – Money earmarked in the federal budget for graduate scholarships could overlook some humanities and social science students, due to a provision reserving the money for “business-related degrees.” The Conservative government has set aside $17.5 million for scholarships to be awarded by the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council – an arm’s length organization that administers publically funded research grants. The extra money for SSHRC will fund an additional 500 doctoral students and 1,000 masters’ students. The move is part of a threeyear expansion of the Canada Graduate Scholarships Program, which also includes $35 million for Natural Sciences and Engineering Research Council and the Canadian Institutes of Health Research. The funding allocated to SSHRC has some scholars concerned due to the lack of a definition for business-related degrees. “In terms of public policy, I don’t see any reason why you’d want to privilege business,” said David McGrane, a scholar of Canadian politics at the University of Saskatchewan. “Other disciplines have a significant contribution to make to the economy,” he said. Scholars in the humanities are perennially concerned that funding bodies overlook the social value of their research. McGrane cautions that

scholars of education and even some social sciences could potentially be excluded from the funding. The exact definition of business-related is ultimately up to SSHRC. Trevor Lynn, a spokesperson for the organization, says the SSHRC is not necessarily shutting out humanities students from the new funding. He says although the definition has not yet been worked out, it would likely be broad. “Our president’s been quoted several times saying that he sees it as a broad definition,” he said. The additional scholarships would obviously include some scholars from business schools, but there are many ways of interpreting what is business-related, Lynn says. Lynn says a humanities student in the field of philosophy could potentially receive a scholarship under this arrangement to study business ethics. Ole Schank is certain his master’s thesis on his favourite poet is not related to business. Luckily, he already has a SSHRC scholarship. “What I’m doing is not at

The Caper Times all business-related. I think what I’m doing is society-related.” Schank says that a graduate student in English could potentially argue that their research is related to business but only in a broad social sense. “It seems like the government is skewing what SSHRC is for,” he said. For those not lucky enough to be in receipt of SSHRC funding, some students say the news just provides another reason to “loathe SSHRC.” Emily Morris, a PhD student in English, says there is an intrinsic value in studying “something for the sake of studying it, rather than the sake of money. People think education is just the means to an end.” Chad Gaffield, president of the SSHRC, has publicly stated the council does not have a list of what degrees qualify for funding, but requires students to produce work that could end up published in an academic journal and that adds to the knowledge in that field. He says their mandate, which emphasizes research, remains unchanged.

Competition for SSHRC scholarships is so high that only seven to nine per cent of all graduate students in the social sciences and humanities receive one. The organization last received a funding boost two years ago when an additional $11 million was earmarked for research in management, business, and finance. Lynn says SSHRC would be settling a definition over the next month, since the budget goes into effect in April. Nikki Ashton, the federal NDP post-secondary education and literacy critic, is not convinced SSHRC’s definition will be so broad. “We need to be clear that the focus is business-related and not economic-related,” she said. Scholarship is a long-term commitment, says Ashton, and Conservative’s strategy too short-sighted. Ashton argues the government’s policy on the scholarship money is part of a shift away from academic freedom. To have the government tell a peer-reviewed research body what type of things to fund is “morally wrong,” she said. Ashton says her office has

been receiving inside information that indicates the big picture may be grim for students in the humanities and social sciences. They are preparing a freedom of information request to try to find out exactly how the funds will be allocated. The temporary expansion of the graduate scholarships program is part of the Conservative government’s economic stimulus package to help jumpstart the waning economy. McGrane says the federal government’s language in the budget is likely ideologically motivated – to ease concerns about deficit spending among business critics and concerned Conservatives. “It’s another way of making the budget palatable to the business interests concerned with the deficit,” he said. The economic effect of employing a graduate student in political science to do some sort of research is virtually the same as hiring a business student to do so, “but I guess I’m biased,” he said. The SSHRC already has an additional $65 million budget for scholarships, which do not preclude particular disciplines.

March 9th, 2009

News // Page 5

since the 1550s,” said Mark Federman, a researcher at the Ontario Institute for Studies in Education and former member of the Marhall Mcluhan Institute at the University of Toronto. Federman says the last time a similar change occurred was the societal upheaval of the Renaissance, when great scientific discoveries shared the world stage with the likes of the Inquisition and witch hunts. He adds everyone needs to be extra-cautious while in the midst of such social change. Federman believes our digital culture increasingly leads us to conduct our private lives in plain public view on the Internet. In terms of the ramifications of the Leduc court case, Federman doesn’t see it as precedent-setting. As courts

often ask for documents and evidence of a person’s lifestyle in a lawsuit, asking for someone’s Facebook information isn’t extraordinary. But how people behave in person and on the Internet is very different. “Society is in a state of confusion,” he said, pointing to what many students post on Facebook as a perfect example. “Some of the people in the fogey generation would say: ‘Be careful. Your employer is going to see this.’” It has been nearly a full school year since Ryerson established Policy 61. Policy 61 is Ryerson’s non-academic student code of conduct, the result of the fallout from the Avenir case, along with the university’s desire to create a more modern guideline for student behaviour online and outside of school. The code prohibits students from distributing “malicious” or untrue materials about other students and faculty,

from being “drunk and disorderly in public,” or hazing other students, among other things. “We’re still breaking ground,” said Mickey Cirak, Ryerson’s student conduct officer. Cirak took on the position just prior to the 2008 school year and Policy 61’s inception. He says that the policy is up for review in 2011, unless the vice-provost students wishes to do so before then. Cirak also doesn’t see the Leduc court case as having an immediate impact on school policy. “Whatever is in the courts is different [than university policy.]” While Policy 61 is an example of the gradual adaptation of post-secondary institutional law to the trends of digital culture, society is still learning to adapt itself. “We’ve now outed what used to be private and are surprised by our actions,” said Federman.

programming “will continue to consist of 80 per cent or more Canadian content during prime time”. Even the CBC executive is going to be sacrificing 1020% of their compensation. I suppose that is something like you or I sacrificing one peanut butter and jam sandwich per year to ease the starvation epidemic in Africa; a token of their consideration but not something that they are really going to feel. Despite the cuts, the reruns and even the token compensation cuts from the executive, and other things, the CBC still expects a shortfall of $171 million.

Yet the corporation is of the conviction that they can still avoid backing away from any whole part of their mandate. So let me buck the trend here for just a minute. We all seem to blame the employer for not making cut-backs in other areas, or making them sooner so as to avoid cutting jobs. That is the nature of the employee. However, if the CBC can make all of these cut-backs and alterations and still intend to meet its base requirements, maybe we should be thankful that the CBC went above and beyond the “call of duty” for the period of time before the economy crashed. Re-

member, CBC is a Crown Corporation; this means that their mandate is legislative and profits are only a secondary objective. For a time, CBC strived to create quality above the bare minimum; CBC strived to meet consumer expectations rather than just the much lower legislative expectations. And, as much as we hate to hear it, CBC perhaps created jobs that it was not required to create. Maybe the CBC should be viewed as a fallen hero rather than a simple villain in this economic mess. Then again, maybe not. But it is certainly worth considering.

The Uncharted Territory Of Digital Law By Alex Hamlyn The Eyeopener (Ryerson University) TORONTO (CUP) – Facebook offers its users a sense of confidentiality and privacy. Personal messages, private chats, and embarrassing photos are meant to be just between the user and their friends. But everything John Leduc considered private will soon be public. Leduc is involved in a lawsuit over a car accident, and the defendant’s lawyers claimed his Facebook page should be included as evidence. The judge on the case agreed, ordering Leduc to submit the contents of his page for trial. This groundbreaking ruling is an example of the developing culture of digital law and

privacy that first erupted on the Ryerson University campus last spring, surrounding the case of Chris Avenir. Avenir, then a first-year engineering student, was accused of cheating for taking part in a Facebook study group that offered solutions and help on chemical engineering assignments. Though one of his professors originally called for his expulsion, the ensuing media maelstrom and student outcry led Ryerson to rethink its position, and Avenir was allowed to stay at the school. Cases like these, and others constantly peppering the news, will only increase as people’s lives move further online and the disconnect between law and society grows. “We’re facing a generation gap like we haven’t seen

Reruns to Save CBC By: Ryan Hynes Perhaps. Decreasing original content and increasing reruns are just a couple of the measures that CBC has proposed as a cost saving tactic to pull itself through these troubling economic times. However, Hubert Lacroix, CEO of CBC, has stated as much as sixty percent of the budget as being devoted to salaries. Clearly, job cuts are going to have to be one of the measures as well. Good news though, Sydney

news room will be remaining! Over 40% of the staff is regrettably being cut, and The Caper Times expresses their concern for those seven employees, but Cape Breton should nonetheless rejoice that we will not lose our last bastion of Caper identity! Moreover, while the Boston Bull is still a viable option, it will not be the better option (as I had expressed a valid concern for in a previous issue). Along with reruns, CBC has said that their television

Page 6 // News Concordia student thwarts British bombing By Terrine Friday The Link (Concordia University) MONTREAL (CUP) – J.P. Neufeld says his friends now call him “Super J.P., Hero of the Internets.” The fine arts student at Montreal’s Concordia University still hasn’t gotten used to the attention he’s received since he averted a high school

Debt-ridden zombies plague B.C. college By Jason Motz, Nexus (Camosun College) VICTORIA (CUP) – Camosun College in Victoria, B.C. was invaded by a horde of zombies on March 30, staggering and moaning through campus. Their purpose was to protest the high cost of education, which causes students to build up large, insurmountable debt loads. These zombies were actually Camosun students as well as members of the Camosun College Student Society. They took time off from their classes to paint their faces white, wear the tattered ruins of Sid Vicious’

ANSSA membership referendum: CBUSU Press Release In a recent Referendum, Cape Breton University students voted in favor of having their Students’ Union become a chartered member of The Alliance of Nova Scotia Students Association (ANSSA). The vote, which took place on March 18th and March 19th, 2009, passed with 94% of voters in favor of joining the alliance.

The Caper Times bombing in the United Kingdom. Neufeld, the oldest of four siblings, insists that he’s just a regular student who did the right thing. “The attention is kinda freaky, I must admit,” Neufeld said as he chomped on his M&M Easter Eggs. “I Google my name and all these articles pop up, whereas just last Tuesday, if you Googled ‘J.P. Neufeld,’ you’d find this doctor doing very doctory

things.” Neufeld was uploading music to Newgrounds.com when he noticed some odd postings on the site’s forum: a high school student had threatened to bomb his school in the coming hours. “Most school shooters have put something online, whether they’re bragging or they want to be caught,” Neufeld said. “I kept that in mind and thought: ‘Hey, I actually have the chance to maybe prevent

wardrobe, and affect their best Thriller-style shuffle. So why the zombie attire? “Student debt is turning us into the living dead,” said CCSS External Executive Chris Gillespie. With only 16 people taking part in the zombie walk, they weren’t the force to be reckoned with compared to the annual autumn zombie walk that takes place downtown each year. But what they lacked in numbers, they made up for in passion. “It looked like a lot of fun,” said 19 year-old general arts student Josh Sissons. “I don’t have any debt myself, but it seemed like a good cause.” Zombie fun aside, the dire message at the heart of the zombie walk was not lost on

its participants. Michael Glover, CCSS student services co-ordinator, who rallied his troops on with an impassioned cry of “You’re evil, you’re undead. Zombify!” said high education costs affect us all. “Education is like infrastructure for our province,” said Glover. “Without that, we’ll be in much worse shape than we are today. We need [education] like we need roads and waterways.” Glover hopes the zombie display will also be a reminder for students of the importance of voting. “Students need to be aware this coming [provincial] election,” said Glover. “Spend some time; think education. Vote early and vote often.”

ANSSA is a non-partisan provincial lobby group now representing over 36,000 students at five post-secondary institutions- including Cape Breton University Students’ Union- across the province of Nova Scotia. Their mandate focuses exclusively on post-secondary education, and is committed to a high quality system that is accessible and affordable to every qualified student. “They have made headway into the fields of government relations, policy development, and public relations,”

remarked Students’ Union President, Matt Stewart. He added, “We are excited to have this new partnership and look forward to having a strong voice around the ANSSA table. ____________________ Editor’s note: To achieve quorum in a referendum, a minimum of 6% of the student body must vote. The two days of online voting saw 7.2% of students participate. For the Yes side of the question, 217 students voted yes, and 13 voted against joining ANSSA.

something here.’” Neufeld, who used Google to find the local law enforcment number and used Skype to call them, was surprised the police took him so seriously. “They didn’t ask if it was a hoax or anything; they didn’t ask why someone from Canada would bother to call

them,” he said. Police apprehended a 16 year-old British male with flammable contents on his way in to class on March 17. “Technology these days really cuts down the distance,” said Neufeld, a native of Winnipeg.

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April 8th, 2009

Spotted Recently: Terry and Pixie

CT Profile // Page 7 By Kenny McClean To the Cape Breton Tar Ponds from the California sun, Terry and Pixie were an

inseparable duo, a familiar sight on the streets of Sydney. With fame comes notoriety, and when a profile of Terry was published

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in the Chronicle Herald, Immigration Canada took it upon themselves to remove the soft-spoken busker from Canada. For a while, it seemed like that was the last we would see of Terry and Pixie. Out of sight, eventually out of mind, life went on. This past weekend Terry and Pixie were rediscovered, living not in California where they came from, but just across the province in Yarmouth. If this were a game of Clue, it would have been the Dog in the Bag with the Abundance of Attitude. Terry is an unassuming man, just another panhandler with a banjo and tambourine. When his duffel bag started barking, something clicked. When prompted, he admitted that he was Terry Lavalle, the man Immigration Canada treated like an unwelcome alien. A resident alien he may have been, but we would all benefit from more people like Terry Lavalle on the streets of Cape Breton. Soft spoken and unflappably cheerful, all Terry wants to do is make music and take care of Pixie. He says he is currently attending school, and claims that being removed from Cape Breton was a blessing in disguise. With any luck, this is the end of Terry and Pixie’s travels for a long, long time, and I think I speak for most of Cape Breton when I wish them all the best.

Page 8 // Entertainment Staying Tuned: Ranting and Raving Smells Like a Tribute to Kurt Cobain by Eileen Coole Well everyone, cry a nostalgic tear because this is the end of The Caper Times for the 2008-2009 school year. This is it, the final show, the last call. Get your belongings together because this hotel party is over until next year. My ideas for the last “Staying Tuned” column of the year were plentiful. I had a few ideas that were lingering around. The thought processes were bickering among each other about which idea should get into the last Staying Tuned column and at the same time, be fitting for the end of the 2008-2009 school year. Then, a light bulb turned on upstairs! What better topic for the end of a music column than the end of grunge? Many theories pertaining

to the end of grunge have lurked around rock and roll communities. Grunge lost its choke-hold to the amount of pop princesses and boy bands circulating the masses. Grunge slowly died because the ethics of the genre were not the same after it became mainstream, suggesting that the explosive trend downgraded certain ideals that fans of grunge originally frowned upon. Grunge was supposed to be about attitude, not solely a marketing ploy for teenagers to buy flannel. Ironically, grunge died because it became popular. The previous gossiped theories about grunge are fairly credible. They ‘have some backbone’, as some Cape Bretoners would phrase it. However, a raging explosion

Book Review: Good Sainte Anne By Kenny McClean Good Sainte Anne, authored by Prince Edward Islander Anthony Morrisey-Ready, is the first release in a series of stories known collectively as “Tales From the Brambles”. Each story, pulished by Quebec-based Blind Road Productions, chronicles the lives of the inhabitants of fictitious Atlantic Canadian “Bramble Island”. This first installment tells about the struggle of bramble islanders to name their new church after their beloved patron “Good Sainte Anne”, while facing resistance from an uncooperative Bishop. Good Sainte-Anne is to a

novel what Monty Python is to Masterpiece Theater. Unabashedly lowbrow at times, but exceedingly well written, it is easy to overlook how well executed the story is because of the style in which it is written. If you have grown up in Cape Breton, PEI, or around Newfies, and know the correct response to “what’re ya at?”, then deciphering Good Sainte Anne’s colloquialisms and vernacular won’t be an issue. There’s a glossary at the front of the book for those who “come from away”, but it would be a difficult story to get into if one didn’t understand the language “right off the bat.” Good Sainte Anne reads

The Caper Times is more noticeable than a fire that slowly dies out. People talk about bigger bangs more frequently than they talk about something slowly dying. What does all of this chatter about theories of the death of grunge have to do with this issue? On April 5thof 1994, Kurt Cobain, the frontman of Nirvana, died of a gunshot wound. Other theories speculate about his death and anyone who follows Kurt Cobain would know these theories. Believe what you want to believe about conspiracy, hitmen, and Courtney Love. This column is sticking to the reported facts of Cobain’s death. It was reported on April 8th, the day they found his body in the garage of the household, that Cobain died of a gunshot wound by his own hand. Let’s face it, Kurt Cobain was a dumbass. You take this scrawny-looking heroin

addict that becomes highly successful and famous. He is said to be the front man of a generation and the whole world wants to be his boyfriend. He hates his uprising, which was his own doing, and keeps threatening to kill himself. He could have walked away from it all. He could have told the paparazzi and the record companies to go shove it up themselves and he could have hidden away from the world and become a hermit if his fame bothered him that much. Some musicians, and sometimes it is hard to think of them, hide away from the public eye every day and they are seemingly happy as a clam about it. But he did not, he was suffering from his own doing and really did not do anything to change it. This makes anyone a dumbass, even a beloved rock star. A dumbass or not, however, Kurt Cobain was a leg-

end and is still a legend to many people. He is known to have turned his own angst into songs that are well remembered. Nirvana made grunge into the fad that we know it as for most of the 1990’s. Grunge was trapped in a dark well and Nirvana climbed up the walls of the well in 1991 with the album “Nevermind” and pushed the cover open to escape. Kurt Cobain is seen as the last most important musician of this generation because he spear-headed grunge into what it became. When he died, grunge died with him. Nirvana, in what seemed like a blink of an eye, changed the 80’s metal scene full of spandex and hairspray to a trend where flannel, doc martens, and not caring about anything was cool. Nirvana changed it and Kurt Cobain was the poster boy of this change. Rest in peace, Kurt Cobain.

like a yarn being spun by a drunken Newfoundlander around a kitchen table, complete with whole pages dedicated to explaining an imagined interruption or question. “...A new fishery was born, by the name of Lobster Fishery. (Well they wouldn’t have called it Dog Fishery or Cat Fishery, now would they? Stop interrupting me, for Jesus sakes!)” Initial impressions being what they are, the book’s style of narrative comes off as a gimmick at first, written in Newfie for a laugh as much as anything else. A few pages in, however, the book becomes hard to put down. It’s told just as a wordof-mouth story would be

told on The Rock, and who doesn’t love a good story? No story is complete without pictures, and the childlike cartoons of Bramble Island and its inhabitants are often as funny as the words accompanying them, up to and including the sketch of an Irishman tied bare-naked to a ship’s mast, his nethers swinging down around his feet. The book makes no secret of its frank nature. The back of the book has a laundry list of 44 groups of people that may be offended after reading the book, and by God, it hits every one of them, from The Holy Ghost, to Turnip Farmers, to “Hoors”, and everyone in between, with special attention paid to the

English and Baptists (“ffouck the English! Ffouck the Baptists!”). This imagined crew of “Desperate Good Catlics” make no secret of the people they despise. What Anthony MorriseyReady has created is a frank piece of alternate history, plausible in its outlandish hyperbole. Often cringe-inducing, charmingly raunchy, always funny, and unerringly entertaining, Good Sainte Anne is the kind of story anyone can enjoy, as long as they don’t mind a chapter or two dedicated to the tale of an Irishman with a pecker like a horse. Interested readers can find more information at the author’s site, talesfromthebrambles.ca.

April 8th, 2009

Entertainment // Page 9

Caper Times Short Story: “Our Destination Counts” (Part III) By: Brittany Mullins “Shhh. It’s okay, Marlee.” It was then he noticed the marks on her arm. “Marlee, are you hurting yourself?” She could not dispute him, even though he was right. She calmed down long enough to look up at him. He knew exactly what she needed, and he obliged. A few hours later, as Marlee and Mark were sitting on the couch, Jake arrived home, noticeably intoxicated and headed right for the bedroom. He did not even bat an eyelash towards Mark and Marlee. “I should get going,” Mark stated as he got up from his perch on the couch. “Yeah, I should be getting to bed soon, anyway.” “I had a nice time. You...you guys throw great get-togethers.” Marlee just nodded as she opened the door for her guest. “Would it be okay if I called you sometime?” Mark asked as he was leaving. “Sure. I would like that.” Marlee smiled at Mark, and he reflected the sentiment. She closed the door and leaned against it, feeling the happiest she had felt in a long time. She clamoured to the bedroom and was met with loud snoring. Rolling into bed, she began to feel guilty about the events of the previous hours. She had fun with Mark, but held an obligation to Jake. She looked at the ring on the bedside table. Was it worth it to spend a lifetime repressing all the things she loved? Her dreams were filled with bliss that night. She woke up smiling and stretched into the not so empty space be-

side her. She had forgotten that he had the day off for once. ‘He must be sleeping off his hangover,” Marlee thought. As she entered the kitchen, she looked out the window. Happiness escaped her that morning. To clear her head, she grabbed her coat and went for a walk. The air was brisk as she moved along the streets. Very few people were awake. She watched as the newspaper was delivered by a young boy on a bicycle, and wished that her life was simple again, not sinful as it was now. “Marlee?” She looked up. “Oh, hi Mark,” “What are you doing here?” He did not sound mad, more confused. “I’m uh, just out for a walk. Clear my head.” “It’s a bit chilly, don’t you think? Why don’t you come in for a minute, you know, to warm up?” Marlee merely nodded, Mark’s house was just as quaint as hers. He lived with Chris and the mystery woman who went to the bar. They were not awake yet, but pictures and schoolbooks were scattered about, indicating that this was their home as well. “Here, have a seat.” Mark said as he pulled a chair out from the kitchen table. Marlee proceeded to sit down. “What brings you up so early?” He asked, “I....I don’t know.” “Look, I wanted to talk about last night.” ‘Uh oh, I blew it. Wait, why am I thinking I blew it with Mark? I’m not engaged to him.’ “I wouldn’t mind hanging out

with you some more, just so you can get things off your chest.” Marlee smiled on the outside, but mentally screamed and cursed at herself from the inside. She wanted nothing more than to be wrapped in Mark’s arms, but she must settle for friendship; she belonged to Jake. “Yeah, I wouldn’t mind that either, actually.” Marlee and Mark sat at the table, smiling at one another. Marlee felt awkward, like a childhood crush was sitting across from her. “I should probably get going. Jake might wonder where I am.” “Yeah.” Marlee got up and waved goodbye to Mark. She ventured back the winding streets to her modest house filled with regret and mistakes. She opened the door. “Where were you?” Jake asked behind the computer screen. “I went for a walk.” “Hmm.” Opening the fridge, she

looked for her chocolate milk. “Jake, have you seen my chocolate milk?” “Um, yeah. Vanessa used it last night to make mudslides. I told her it was cool.” Marlee just sighed and grabbed the orange juice. Later that day, Mark and Chris showed up at the house. Marlee answered the door. “Oh, hey guys.” “Hey. Jake here?” Chris inquired. “Yeah. Come in.” Mark and Marlee exchanged glances. “Jake! Chris is here!” Jake came barreling out of the bedroom, one arm in the sleeve of his jacket. “Hey guys! I’m going out. See you later, Marlee.” Marlee readied herself for a kiss that never came. “Actually, guys, I’m going to stay here and keep Marlee company. I’ve already seen that movie three times anyway,” Mark said. “Suit yourself,” Chris added as he and Jake left. “You could’ve gone. I’m fine here by myself.” “I know, but I saw what happened two seconds ago, and

I needed to finish it.” With that, Mark’s lips grazed hers, giving Marlee goose bumps. “Hey, I just forgot-” Jake had opened the door to find his fiancé locked in a kiss with Mark. The two immediately split apart. Jake picked up his keys and slammed the door. “Oh my God, oh my God,” Marlee kept repeating. “I’m going to get going. Just in case he comes back sooner than expected.” Mark left with the same vigour as the kiss had. Marlee was left to revel in her thoughts. She could either spend her life hating what she had, or have to enter a world foreign to her for so many years. She left her house without leaving a note. She walked along the streets, ending up at the cliff where Jake had proposed to her. The air was damp. The wind picked up quickly from the tides ebbing and flowing. She did not know what she was going to do. She did not know she was solving her own problem until she felt the wind rush by her ears.

Page 10 // Entertainment

The Caper Times

One Act but Countless Lessons – Brittany Harnum The One Act Play Festival is a seasonal favorite for both writers and theatre goers. As the audience goes they receive the great opportunity to watch a series of fun, beautiful and interesting plays from the local talent. It’s never the same play twice. So if one play didn’t really appeal to you then maybe the next one will. The variety of characters, actors, and plots all rolled into one night is delightful. For one example, in one night I witnessed the famous women of history display their charms and messages to a modern teenage girl, in “Herstory” and the comic realization of love and marriage in “An Inconvenient convenience store”; From Cleopatra and Marilyn Monroe to a stumbling store clerk and a living magazine rack. Needless to say it is not your typical play, but in a way it is. People go to plays to laugh, to cry, to be scared and to be shocked. Technically all the mayhem is just a normal day out. The theatre is diverse, each individual actors brings their own personality to the character (whether the director likes it or not), the production crew and designers all have their own vision within the scope of the play. Perhaps that’s why people like plays? Who knows, I’m not a philosopher (nor can I pretend to be one- even if I wanted to) but the diversity of all the plays at this year’s festival was intriguing, there was sure to be something for everyone. There’s more to the play,

however, than just the audience. The writers and actors are put into the spotlight. Some are familiar faces to the stage; those that appeared in other productions from this season, but there were also so many new ones. I can almost see Todd Hiscock’s face light up, thinking of all the fresh faces took their first steps on the intimidating Boardmore stage. They came, they rehearsed and they were great. New aspiring writers threw their scripts to the anticipating audience, and more importantly to the Festival Adjudicator, Marguerite McNeil. Like I said; the festival isn’t just about the audience. It’s about the new talent that the One Act Play Festival brings out. It is about the growth of the writer and players and how to make them better. This is where Marguerite McNeil comes in. McNeil’s career in theatre and film has given her the qualifications for this year’s adjudicator. Her studies include studying in New York and London. She played many roles such as Blanche DuBois in “Streetcar Named Desire”, Isadora Duncan in “U.S.A.”, Abigail in ”The Crucible” just to name a few. Her film career has been just as busy including “The Divine Ryan’s”, “Marion Bridge”, “Shattered City, Halifax Explosion” and many more. She remains very active in the local Canadian and Nova Scotia theatre scene. At the end of every night the cast, crew and audience (who chose to go)

would gather in the Faculty Lounge and discuss the play. She would offer her critique on everything from lighting, to actors to prop placement and on the writer themselves. Nothing was off limits. She was nothing but fair in her judgments, merely stating what worked and what didn’t. Everyone had a chance to ask questions and provide feedback. Although the little chat could be quite stressful for the impressionable new blood it was a learning experience they would never forget. No play is ever perfect, nor is

any actor but the festival offers a chance to smooth out the rough edges on the up rising stars and light a fire for the dramatics in their hearts. Marguerite was a fabulous mentor for the festival providing insight to a new generation. Her energy and love for the performances was felt by all those who were there. Her final advice seemed to be this: speak loud, stay in character, keep the flow of the play, and command the stage you’re on. Oh and most importantly have fun and enjoy what you do.

Will You Be a CBU Student Next Year? If so, you should come on up and check out the Caper Times Office. We keep an open door policy in our newsroom, and if you are interested in saying your piece, reporting some hard news, or are just interested in snapping a few pictures, come on up, we can always use the help. Here’s the catch: We Pay

April 8th, 2009

Entertainment // Page 11

CBUSU BATTLE OF THE

CBUSU Press Release After seven weeks of fierce competition, the Easy Bleeders were declared the winners of Cape Breton University Students’ Union Battle of the Bands competition. They will advance to compete at Acadia University where they will battle it out with winning bands from participating university competitions from across the Maritime Provinces. This first ever competition at CBU featured ten very talented local groups. Taking the stage to showcase their local talents were: Of All Things, Tomorrow’s Attraction, Into the Ether, River Road, Back Pocket Material, Ricochet, Painting Purple, Bonum Salvo, Thought Machine, and the Easy Bleeders. Each Band displayed their own unique genre. Winners were determined through a process of elimination by a panel of three varying judges who have an interest in the local music scene. The competition sponsored by Molson Canadian, The Giant, and Smashbox Studio additionally awarded the winning band with $1,000 and recording time with Smashbox Studio. The runners-up, Thought Machine, took home $500. “The Battle of the Bands has been a highlight this year with many students and we hope that we can make the competition an annual event,” remarked Students’ Union Vice President and President-Elect, Ricky McCarthy. “The talent was extraordinary, drawing a larger crowd as each week went by.”

BANDS

Photos Courtesy: Chris Lawrence

Page 12 CBUSU would like to wish all students good luck with their exams, and a safe and happy summer holiday. Thank you, from all of us, here at Cape Breton University Students’ Union

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The Caper Times