Cut 'n Paste Wrestling Boozeletter Issue #1 Rare Mint

CUT’NPASTE May 2007

100% Stolen Content Wrestling Boozeletter

Storm Sayz There are absolutely way too many gimmick matches being done.

GIMMICK MATCHES BY LANCE STORM I’ve had a few people asking me about gimmick matches, and if I think there are too many of them in wrestling today. My answer is a whole hearted YES. (reprinted without permission from stormwrestling.com)

There are absolutely way too many gimmick matches being done. That being said, the sheer volume of gimmick matches isn’t even the real problem, the real problem, in my opinion, is that they are all being done for either no reason what so ever, or the wrong reasons all together. I’ve mentioned this before, but I’ve gotten to the point where I feel a lot of the people in this industry have com-

pletely lost sight of what this business is about. This business is about conflict and the battle to resolve that conflict. You take two people and put them in a ring to fight. To give that fight meaning you create a championship for them to fight for. They then battle to see who the better man is, to either win that championship or climb the ladder towards that championship. That’s it, that’s the wrestling business. That’s the steak; everything

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else is just the sizzle.

Internet Favourite Lance Storm Father, husband, trainer, wrestler, writer and the only sane person in wrestling.

Not too many people want to eat just a plain steak so we add the sizzle. We add angles, characters, and storylines to make the steak more appetizing (the conflict more interesting). The concept of a gimmick match is to create an environment that might settle the conflict after the usual means (a regular match) has failed to do so. The gimmick match is supposed to occur later in an angle and needs to relate to the angle so fans are more apt to pay to see the gimmick match in hopes of it settling the conflict. Where this concept really got lost, was with the advent of the Hardcore Title. WWE started having hardcore matches just for the sake of having hardcore matches. Guys weren’t hitting each other with weapons and enduring unbelievable amounts of punishment because of a deep-rooted hatred developed over a long-standing feud; they were killing each other just because it was a hardcore match. There was no specific conflict to be resolved it was just a gimmick match for the sake of a gimmick match. Since then it has only gotten worse. Gimmick matches are used simply to extend feuds, but no booking effort is being

made to tie the gimmick match into the reason the conflict wasn’t resolved the last time out. There are even times (TNA in particular) where a “concept” gimmick match is invented and instead of building to it with the appropriate angle they just have it for the sake of having it. To illustrate the way things are supposed to be done, I’ll invent a scenario using Sting and Flair. Fans wanted to see Sting beat Flair for the title, so they booked a match and sold tickets. People showed up to see Sting win the title. Once Sting locked on the Scorpion Death Lock the Horsemen hit the ring and beat Sting up. Sting won by DQ but didn’t win the title. Fans still wanted to see Sting win the title, so they booked the next match and barred the Horsemen from ringside. Fans thought without the Horseman, Sting would definitely win the title (resolve the conflict) so they bought more tickets. This time out after getting his butt kicked Flair rolled out of the ring and got counted out. Again Sting wins but the title still eludes him. Finally they book a Cage match. Fans figure, Horsemen can’t get in, Flair can’t get out, this time the conflict will be resolved, Stings will win the title for sure, THEY BUY MORE TICKETS! We then have the match, the Horsemen don’t

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get in, Flair doesn’t get out (so the gimmick match actually does what it is suppose to do) and Sting wins the F’N title. This isn’t rocket science. Today we, more often than not, get gimmick matches where the gimmick has nothing to do with why the feud is on going, or why the conflict was not resolved the first time. A great example of this is the Backlash Undertaker, Dave Batista rematch. WWE built up a great conflict between these two men, and fans watched WrestleMania to see the conflict resolved. The match had a clear and decisive winner; Undertaker won right in the middle with a Tombstone Pile Driver (conflict resolved). We then went to Backlash and they were booked in a Last Man Standing match. WHY? What does this gimmick match offer us that the previous one didn’t? How will this gimmick change the outcome? Was a Tombstone in the middle of the ring some how not a decisive enough win? I don’t get it. On the other hand the John Cena, Umaga Last Man Standing match earlier this year made perfect sense. Umaga destroyed John Cena in the previous match, but Cena managed a fluke roll up win, to save the title. Vince, wanting Umaga to beat John for the title then booked the

Last Man Standing Match. am not, and judging by doBased on how the previous mestic buy rates, neither are match went, this certainly a lot of other people. seemed like greater jeopardy for the champ. Fans would presumably buy tickets to see if the Hero John Cena could survive this new, greater threat! This doesn’t even begin to cover all the absurd, meaningless gimmick matches we’ve had to endure over the years. Remember Judy Bagwell on a pole, Viagra on a Pole? What conflict were those matches meant to resolve? How about every match on the card being fought inside a steel cage, because… well perhaps just because it’s easier to leave the damn thing up than it is to take it down. Or better yet, that atrocity on Impact last week with the X-Division guys. I don’t know what it was called, what the rules were, what the hell was going on during the match, or why it was the means by which to select 2 guys for guess what… another freaking gimmick match (a three way dance for the X title) being done for no reason what so ever! I guess if you can’t book an interesting angel, it’s easiest just to book a bunch of gimmick matches and hope people are willing to spend their money to see those. Sadly I

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TNA IS A-OKAY

news, but only PWTorch Newsletter readers

BY WADE KELLER

the booking committee have been doing a

There are several things about TNA fans in St. Louis last night that drove me a bit nuts.

months, hoping the heat clears the way for their

If the TNA fans want to be taken seriously when they express approval or disapproval of the product, they have to get their facts straight, be consistent from minute to minute, and not be so easy to forgive when they're thrown a meaningless stunt bump. In her interview with the UK Sun this weekend, Dixie Carter, in her nice way, mocked the fans for chanting "Holy sh--!" and "T-N-A" just two minutes after chanting "Fye-errrr Rooosooo!" at the last PPV. TNA fans have been misled, either through faulty assumptions or faulty reporting elsewhere, that the TNA product they are watching has much of anything to do with Vince Russo. Chanting "Fire Russo" at a TNA event is the equivalent of chanting "Fire Gewirtz" or "Fire Lagana" at Raw. This shouldn't be breaking

have been told this in the past several months. The anti-Russo people out for his spot on good job spreading anti-Russo propaganda for

INTERIDJGITS

insertion or return to the booking committee. Russo, if he had control, might make the product even worse. Maybe it's taking a ton of effort by those with power and influence to keep him from making things worse. Or maybe he'd make it better. But what you see now is not a Russso product. Just as in WWE where it's Vince McMahon's show, in TNA it's Jeff Jarrett's show. He's the primary booker with 80 percent influence over the final product, with another 15 percent going to Dutch Mantel, and 5 percent from Russo. Jarrett sets the direction for major storylines, he books the PPV line-ups, he's behind the gimmick-crazy format (which longpreceded Russo's arrival late last year), he's behind the convoluted finishes (which longpreceded Russo)... it's his product. At booking meetings, he presents Russo with what he wants and it's Russo job to do the grunt work

TNA Star Samoa Jones

Real Life Pictures Of The Internet Wrestling Community You read their posts every day. Now see what they look like in the real world. Say hello to this months Interwebtardz. Top to bottom; Ed Ferrara, David Bixenspan and Vinny Verhei.

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ALL IS WELL

of formatting it into a script. Russo can't

chanted "This is awesome" at the latest stunt by

say this outloud because he'd be implicating

Styles - a stunt which meant nothing in the con-

his boss, so he sits back and takes it. Good for

text of the match - and another thumbtacks

Dixie to stand up for him in the UK Sun inter-

spot. This crap is not good for TNA or wrestling,

view.

and fans who are smart enough to see the disasters that preceded it shouldn't be so easy to

But Dixie isn't going to take the vocal

"pop" for the latest stupid, dangerous, or mean-

"smart fans" (an old-style term that is used

ingless stunt. It's easy to get wrapped up in the

derisively within wrestling to mock fans who

moment live, but it's unbecoming of any respect

think they know more than they do) seriously if

by those in power when that's what you're pop-

they can't even get their facts straight.

ping for.

Secondly, quit chanting "This is awesome!"

Styles risked his well-being, and for what?

at a big spot that makes no sense, has no im-

First of all, TNA's production crew couldn't be

pact, is something we've seen all too often

bothered to get the camera shot right even

before, and involves a near-death experience

though they knew it was coming. Second, it

for a wrestler for zero purpose in the match -

looks totally fake since he just happened to get

especially when it's thrown on the card by Jar-

knocked off the cage right above where a bunch

rett to try to distract from the fact that he's not

of wrestlers had congregated and happened to

doing anything on his own worthy of pops or

be ready to catch him. Third, the huge bump

praise.

had no bearing on the match or the fallout from the match. It was thrown into the match like a

Last night, the fans rightfully booed the

biscuit tossed to a dog who's been otherwise

fiascos that were the blindfold match (among

neglected and abused all day. And the St. Louis

the ten worst matches I've ever seen for a

fans snapped up the biscuit, wagged their tails,

number of reasons) and the electrified cage

and embarrassed themselves in front of TNA

match. But then, minutes later, the fans

management by showing how "easy" they are.

Eric Young TNA’s Ratings Draw

The Hope of TNA Top to bottom; Dutch Mantel wears a prophetic tshirt during his wrestling days. Jeff Jarrett’s wife should be dead soon enough for him to make a full time return soon. RVD is TNA? Mr. Thursday Night has been too stoned lately to realize how much TNA sucks. Look for his debut soon. Dude.

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part, then maybe Dixie would conThe point of the match was to establish a

sider the silence in the arena when

new no. 1 title contender and to see if Jarrett

Jarrett's music stopped and he

could be trusted. When the match was over,

was cleaning house in the ring as

Jarrett had just given Sting the title shot (proving

a sign of something - like, what

from a storyline standpoint that he "could be

everyone has been saying for

trusted after all," but also devilishly sending the

years - which is Jarrett is not a top

message to fans that he could have won the

level act and he's holding the

match and thus was the top star of the match).

company back with shoddy, self-

On camera after the match, Joe and Sting ap-

serving booking that Dixie is sim-

preciated Jarrett's move; Angle seemed upset

ply not experienced or savvy

(and we don't, yet,

enough to

know why). But

detect. In-

Styles's bump? It's

stead, Dixie

already part of

can write it off

TNA history, ex-

as finicky fans

cept for the high-

who are un-

light clips of it on

predictable

Impact later this

and unin-

week.

formed.

The stunt

TNA fans, if

bump Styles took

you want a

is meant to appeal

better prod-

to bloodthirsty,

uct, stop

stunt-seeking fans

popping for meaningless

who get off on seeing a talented wrestler -

stunt bumps and get your facts straight about

whose craft is being completely underutilized by

who's to blame for what you personally don't

an inept booking team - risk his well-being for a

like. Discourtesy of pwtorch.com Hi Wade.

five second adrenaline rush that means nothing otherwise within the stories TNA is telling. Jarrett gets the spotlight on him after doing almost nothing. He's the last in the match. He throws a couple dropkicks, yanks down a couple weapons, and books himself in the glory spot of magnanimously handing Sting the win he himself earned for his team. Styles? He gets to be the stunt man who takes a risky dive for no reason other than try to prop up a promotion that is being built around a wrestler who made his triumphant, heavily-hyped return to PPV only to be met by complete silence. If the TNA fans knew their stuff and weren't chanting "Fire Russo" instead of "Fire Jarrett" or a more generic "This sh-- sucks" chant, and if they weren't so easy to forgive whenever a completely underutilized talent is used as a human sacrifice to distract from the fact that Jarrett has booked himself into a glory spot with little or no effort or skill being required on his

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So what’s next for Hulk?

HOGAN DOES KNOW BEST BY BRYAN ALVAREZ

Hogan, though greatly upset with the turn of events (as was Lawler, though he had to politically put on a happy face), called his old buddy Paul Wight, formerly the Big Show (who Hogan broke into wrestling), and asked him to be the replacement. Lawler didn't end up coming to the show at all. The show drew at most 6,000 fans (this was the consensus from

The big Hulk Hogan vs. Paul Wight show at the FedEx Forum in Memphis

most reports, though others said there was no way 6,000 were in the

on Friday night could best be considered a cautious success.

building, and Bubba the Love Sponge on his radio show surprisingly

As most of you are aware, the idea was to do Hogan vs. Jerry Lawler

claimed 2,500). The FedEx Forum seats 19,000 for basketball, which

based on a match from 20 years ago where Lawler beat Hogan via

means for a wrestling indy show with no stage, ramp, etc., you could

countout. Clips of the match, minus the countout, have aired on Memphis

likely fit 20,000 in there. With that said, WWE has run house shows and

TV forever, with the idea obviously being to claim that Lawler won via pin.

done nowhere near 20,000, and in fact not much more than Hogan drew

In the middle of last year, they began building towards a Lawler vs. Hogan

this evening. This was also 6,000 fans drawn for one match -- one man, in

rematch, which most figured would never happen. But amazingly, the

fact -- as nobody was there to see Wight and they didn't even release a

match was signed, the wheels were put into motion, and then, due to a

full card until the night before (and upon seeing the card, it could be ar-

major fallout between Vince McMahon and Hogan just weeks before the

gued that the lack of a card might have helped ticket sales). I'm told from

show, Lawler was not only strongly advised not to wrestle Hogan, but all

folks in Memphis that once Jerry Lawler was pulled from the show interest

WWE talent was pulled from Memphis television. Promoter Cory Maclin,

plummeted greatly, so had he worked the match with Hogan they could

who had been told that WWE would pay him back for the deposit he put

have realistically put upwards of 9,000 or 10,000 people in the building. If

down on the FedEx Forum (originally the show was supposed to take

you look at this from the perspective of it being an independent wrestling

place at the much smaller Mid-South Coliseum, but the building was not

event, it was a pretty damn big success. In fact, you could argue that Hulk

up to code), refused to back down and insisted on running the show.

Hogan himself drew 6,000 fans or so on his own, which is very impres

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sive. Hogan ended up doing over a dozen media appearances the day of the show, which likely helped walk-up quite a bit. The gate was likely in the $250,000 range, so Hogan probably made around half of that for his appearance, a pittance when you factor in what he'd make for a typical WWE PPV. However, this clearly was not about the money; the whole thing was taped by VH-1 for Hogan Knows Best, and if anything it was a video resume to hopefully get him a job with McMahon again. Reprinted without the permission of the EMPIRE~! f4wonline.com

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STAR OF THE MONTH

Here’s why the markz are creaming their shortz about this dude.

“MVP is definitely fabulous” - DVDA Dude

“he's got way more of a

-Dave Keller WrestlingTorch.com

1234 Main Street

“Anyone who posted in the MVP and CM Punk threads are shitheads. So fuck you, I'm out.” - Nut Bunnies on F$W BBS.

Anytown, State 54321

presence than Kennedy” -B.A. Lynnwood, WA “He can eat 50 eggs” - Sweet Daddy Paddy

“I'm on the MVP bandwagon”

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