Bulletin August 09

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Volume LXXXII, Number 8, August, 2009

God calls us to All Saints’ Episcopal Church, the oldest Episcopal Church in Oakland County (est. 1837). Here, allwho seek the love of Christ are welcome. Here, we seek to deepen our spiritual lives through a rich heritage of worship and music. Here, we seek to serve the wider community, as He calls us to do, through ministry and service. Here, we look to our past for inspiration and to the future with anticipation. Adopted by the Vestry on September 15, 2008 fails to elicit some intriguing responses. We all need a good laughnow and again. From a book titled Little Wonder by Mary Hollingsworth, enjoy this colorful rendition of the Creation and Old and New Testament tales.

In case you're a little foggy on your biblical history, let our junior church students help you with this complete overview of the Bible, compiled from their essays: In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was nothing but God, darkness, and some gas. The Bible says, "The Lord thy God is one," but I think He must be a lot older than that. Anyway, God said, "Give me a light!" and someone did. Then God made the world.

One of our favorite jobs has been leading junior church. We try to do more than baby-sit our church's beloved little anklebiters during their time in our special junior church facility. We aim to give them a solid background in biblical history. At the end of each year, we give them pencils and paper and ask them to chronicle what they have learned. This assignment never

He split the Adam and made Eve. Adam

and Eve were naked, but they weren't embarrassed because mirrors hadn't been invented yet. Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad apple, so they were driven from the Garden of Eden. Not sure what they were driven in though, because they didn't have cars. Adam and Eve had a son, Cain, who hated his brother as long as he was Abel. Pretty soon all of the early people died off, except for Methuselah, who lived to be like a million or something.

them His top ten Commandments. These include don't lie, cheat, smoke, dance, or covet your neighbor's bottom (the Bible uses a bad word for bottom that I'm not supposed to say. But my Dad uses it sometimes when he talks about the President). Oh, yeah, I just thought of one more: Humor they father and they mother. One of Moses' best helpers was Joshua who was the first Bible guy to use spies. Joshua fought the battle of Geritol and the fence fell over on the town.

One of the next important people was Noah, who was a good guy, but one of his kids was kind of a ham. Noah built a large boat and put his family and some animals on it. He asked some other people to join him, but they said they would have to take a rain check.

After Joshua came David. He got to be king by killing a giant with a slingshot.

After Noah came Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jacob was more famous than his brother, Esau, because Esau sold Jacob his birthmark in exchange for some pot roast. Jacob had a son named Joseph who wore a really loud sports coat. He had a son named Solomon who had about 300 wives and 500 porcupines. My teacher says he was wise, but that doesn't sound very wise to me. After Solomon there were a bunch of major league prophets. One of these was Jonah, who was swallowed by a big whale and then barfed up on the shore.

Another important Bible guy is Moses, whose real name was Charlton Heston. Moses led the Israel Lights out of Egypt and away from the evil Pharaoh after God sent ten plagues on Pharaoh's people. These plagues included frogs, mice, lice, bowels, and no cable. God fed the Israel Lights every day with manicotti. Then He gave 2

book of Revolution.

Vestry Highlights The Vestry met on July 13th. Highlights include: •

There were also some minor league prophets, but I guess we don't have to worry about them.

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After the Old Testament came the New Testament. Jesus is the star of the New Testament. He was born in Bethlehem in a barn. (I wish I had been born in a barn, too, because my Mom is always saying to me, "Close the door! Were you born in a barn" It would be nice to say, "As a matter of fact, I was.")

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Resolved that the awarding of live animals or fish as prizes at parish functions is banned. The phone in the elevator is now operational and connects directly to the Otis Elevator office A towing sign has been placed in the parking lot advising that cars will be towed at owner’s expense

A complete copy of the minutes for July will be posted on the bulletin board after they are accepted at the Vestry meeting in August.

ALL SAINTS’ MEN’S CLUB WHO WE ARE During His life, Jesus had many arguments with sinners like the Pharisees and the Republicans. Jesus also had twelve opossums. The worst one was Judas Asparagus. Judas was so evil that they named a terrible vegetable after him.

 We are the men of All Saints’. All male members of this congregation are automatically members of the club. How you choose to participate is your individual choice. WHAT WE ARE AND DO

Jesus was a great man. He healed many leopards and even preached to some Germans on the Mount. But the Republicans and all those guys put Jesus on trial before Pontius the Pilot. Pilot didn't stick up for Jesus. He just washed his hands instead.

 We are a group of men with many skills. We will use these skills to foster the spiritual and temporal well being of our parish family, our neighborhood and our community.  We are a group of men with many personalities. We will share these personalities in a spirit of camaraderie, good will and fun for

Anyways, Jesus died for our sins, then came back to life again. He went up to Heaven but will be back at the end of the Aluminum. His return is foretold in the 3

the betterment of all whom we encounter.

Two boys were walking home from Sunday school after hearing a strong sermon about the devil. One said to the other, “What do out think about all this Satan stuff?” The other boy replied, “Well, you know how Santa Claus turned out. It’s probably just your dad.”

 We are a group of Christian men. We will live our lives honoring that and encompassing an ecumenical spirit for all others.

August Celebrations Happy Birthday!

1 – Richard Fitzgerald, Andy Wigent 8 –Ruth Brice, Robert Dawson, George Hedgespeth 11 – Trinee James 15 – Jim Bowie 16 – Shannon Williams 18 – Catherine Craig, Ann Poole 19 – Mary Louise Pridmore 20 – Elaine Young 21 – Leord Wynn 24 – Dennis Daily, Mackenzie Fisher 26 – Shirley Knebel

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Bound Together Summer Fun Fifteen children enjoyed two weeks of summer fun by attending Bound Together’s summer camp program. In partnership with the Creative Arts Center, the children were instructed in the areas of art, music, dance, and of course field trips were included. The children had the opportunity to visit the Cranbrook Science Center I-Max theater to watch Star-Trek. They sat in special chairs to simulate what it’s like to be white water rafting and to feel how powerful the rushing of the rapids can be. The second field trip took them to the Children’s Hands On Museum in Flint. At the museum, the children spent the day working on their own experiments and observing experiments from instructors. How excited everyone was when they observed what happens when you mix pop and Mementos together. The end result…. how high could the pop shoot up?

Tuesday, August 4, 5:00-8:00 p.m. Hispanic Outreach Services 76 Williams Street Bring your family for an evening of fun as we celebrate our new location with music and refreshments RSVP to [email protected]

Thank you, Carol, and the staff at the Creative Arts Center for another year of summer camp fun.

Didya know? Abby Brandenburg attends Michigan State Univesity and just completed her freshman year. Hooray! She is studying horticulture. Over the winter holiday she visited the local florist and garden center, GoldnerWalsh. Then before summer vacation she wrote them, offering to work without pay! They accepted her generous offer and liked her work so much that she now has a paid position. Good plan and good work, Abby! Another addition to the service members for whom we pray is Major Brett King, the 5

son-in-law of Meg and Byron Love. Brett and Heather have two children and live in Colorado Springs. Brett flies C-17 cargo planes and flew many overseas missions. He now teaches at the Air Force Academy.

When the lovely morning glory vines began their climb, we discovered Michael Boron was superman scaling the sides of tall buildings! We asked Michael to describe his secret method: he tied a loop on the end of the rope and using his 15-foot tree pole pruner, reached out from the platform atop the outside staircase and hooked the end to the eavestrough bracket. He said it was “just a matter of gravity”. Seems a whole lot more to us, we’ll stock to the Superman story! Thanks, Michael!

We welcome Alicia Williams, our new nursery attendant.

News, Please! Call Ann Poole Alicia lives here in Pontiac, having moved from Detroit four years ago. She has worked at Crofoot School and with Bound Together. This summer she is employed by the Pontiac Creative Arts Center, our next block neighbor. Since Crofoot School has closed and the students there will attend Jefferson School, Alicia is hoping to work there as well. We are glad she is here.

At a Glance Congregational Life

What did YOU think when the orange ropes appeared on the parking lot side of the Church? We heard several interesting guesses; among them: preparation for hanging a large banner announcing something. . .pig roast??? or something else, repairs to the roof???

PRAYER SHAWL The Prayer Shawl Ministry first met in the winter of 2006. A group of interested knitters gathered to knit shawls for those in physical, emotional or spiritual need and to have fellowship together. Meetings start with prayer as wool and needles are plied in a contemplative setting. The 6

shawls are prayed over as they are knit, sometimes with intention for the known recipient and sometimes with hope for the unknown recipient. As shawls are completed, they are gathered and dedicated to God’s glory before being given away. This group meets at 7:00 p.m. the second Wednesday of each month Call Carolyn Simpson for further details (248) 854-9136

like to receive a visit? This program is for those who are home-bound, in hospital, or residing in assisted living or nursing facilities. This ministry of volunteers, under the supervision of the Rev. Roger Derby, provides this gift on an "as-needed" basis. To schedule a visit, or if you are interested in becoming a LEV, please contact Roger Derby or the Rector. Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves. Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. Galatians 6:7

CAREER NETWORKING GROUP All Saints’ has established a career networking group which will meet monthly. If you are currently employed, unemployed, looking for a new opportunity, or can share your knowledge, your input is valuable. For additional information call Tony Skillman at 248-9220375.

Meetings

MEN’S GROUP All Saints’ men’s group meets the second Monday of each month. Any questions should be directed to John Meyer (3359194) [email protected].

AA AND NA MEETINGS Mondays, 7 p.m., Westside AA

Our Lay Eucharistic Visitors (LEVs) are trained and ready to offer Holy Eucharist or to pray with those who are unable to attend worship. Do you know someone who is unable to come to church, but would

Mondays, 8:30 p.m., Keep Coming Back NA Fridays, 11 a.m., Pike & Williams AA Fridays, 7 p.m., Big Book AA

ALL SAINTS’ EPISCOPAL CHURCH A warm and inclusive Christian community in an accessible building We are located on 171 West Pike St. at Williams St. in Pontiac. Services are held at 8 and 9:30 a.m. on Sundays and 12:10 p.m. on Wednesdays. The office is closed on Friday. BULLETIN STAFF: Rector: Rev. Karen Johanns Parish Administrator: Norma Warner Didya Know?: Ann Poole 7

CONTACT US Call: 248/334-4571 Write: P.O. Box 430357, Pontiac MI 48343 Visit our web site: www.allsaintspontiac.org Email the church office: [email protected]

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