Before You Bah Humbug Christmas

Before you Bah Humbug Christmas A few years ago a couple of Jehovah’s Witnesses showed up at my door around Christmastime and handed me a little booklet “exposing” the paganism of Christmas. I smiled. And politely reminded them that I found it impossible to accept their research as factual, since they don’t know the difference between eating blood and a blood transfusion. I wished them a Merry Christmas anyway and closed the door before my dachshund, Oscar, decided to take a nip at their toes. Seems there’s always someone who wants to tear down Christmas. I expect the atheist to do it. After all, they don’t have three wise men and virgin in their group, and jealousy can lead to some nasty behavior. But I’m shocked when I hear Muslims (who also claim to believe Jesus was born of a virgin- even though I believe their Isa isn’t my Jesus- but that’s a whole other blog). And I’m likewise shocked when people who claim to be Christian say they won’t celebrate Christmas because it’s pagan. It is? They point to the tree and say: the druids did it first! They’re especially fond of pointing to the date, December 25, as pagan. One whammy involves the claim that Rome celebrated a winter solstice complete with the feast of the Son of Isis. Ah, yes. The old “Jesus is really Horus” debacle. Never mind that Horus’ birth is believed to be linked to the OGDOAD (eight deities worshipped in Hermopilis), detractors will still try and link Horus to Christ. Strange though, Christ’s birth was never linked to eight “deities.” Only to three wise men, a bunch of unnamed shepherds, and a rather irritable King. But what about this December 25th thing? In every reputable writing about Horus and his birth, not a single scholar insists on an ascribed birthday for Horus. Though some say he was possibly born in April. Much as people have been influenced by The DaVinci code, people (whether knowingly or unknowingly) have been influenced by other fictional, conspiratorial works intended to either knock Christianity down or at least knock Catholocism down a peg (the Monks did it!)There’s not a few problems with the claim that Christ was a “version” of the Horus myth. Claim #1-Horus and Jesus are born from a virgin.The story of the conception of Horus doesn’t read at all like the miraculous conception of Christ. Horus’ father, Osiris, had been killed by his evil brother, Seth. Isis, Horus’ mother and Osiris’ widow, goes on a hunt for the parts of his dismembered body and is successful in finding all of them----- except the penis. So Isis takes matters into hand and makes her own little penis (or maybe not so little) to replace the missing one. Perhaps the first dildo? She humps it like a crazed hooker and the end result: Horus. Please find a virginal conception in there for me. Claim #2-Both Horus and Jesus were born to a Mary and Joseph. (Seb)The name “Mary” wasn’t known in ancient Egypt pre-Christ. Isis was the name of Horus’ mother. And Seb wasn’t the name of Horus’ father, either. Osiris was. But Seb WAS Osiris’ father’s name. Though the name “Seb” is a distinctive form of Joseph, to try and claim that the Seb of Horus lore (Horus’ grandfather) is the same as Osiris is simply inaccurate.Ah heck, it’s a lie. Claim #3-Both were born of royal descent.Some of Jesus’ relatives had royal blood, others did not. And there’s no evidence that Horus was born from royalty. Being a “goddess” (as was Isis) and being a “god” (as was Osiris) isn’t the same as being “earthly royalty”.

Claim #4-Both births were announced by angels and witnessed by shepherds.There are no indicators from any reputable sources that the birth of Horus was announced by anything. Some texts indicate that Horus was delivered in a swamp- hardly a place one would find shepherds. And Acharya mentions that Horus was born in a cave. Some Christmythians try to claim that Christ was born in a cave, therefore is the similarity. Fact is, the Horus myth is uncertain about this fact and in some texts there’s no mention whatsoever. Claim #5-Both were heralded by stars and angels. I would challenge anyone to find this in any of texts. While Acharya does mention (and others repeat) that there are three stars in Orion called “the three kings” this doesn’t mean that there was any heralding of Horus’ birth by them, let alone, angels. Claim #6-Both had later visitors (Horus-3 deities and Jesus-3 wisemen.)The story of three wise men visiting Christ is tradition, not scripture. The Bible never says how many Maggi visited Christ to worship him. Also, there’s no indication in any of the accounts of the birth of Horus that three deities visited after his birth. Claim #7-Both had murder plots against them. Well, here’s the classic example of a half-truth used to deceive. While it’s true that Seth wanted to kill Horus and Herod wanted to kill Jesus, any similarity ends there, since Horus’ mission in life was to kill Seth (avenging his father’s death). Jesus’ mission wasn’t to kill Herod. Claim #8: They were born on the same day! First of all, we don’t know the birth dates for either of them. Not with any precision. There’s one reference that has Horus born on the 31st day of the Egyptian month of Khoiak. Good luck figuring that one out! To date we have no true idea how that correlates to our calendar. One of the big problems with the Christmythians is that they tend to base their positions on, well, less than reliable resources. One major one is Gerald Massey. Massey’s work is often quoted almost as though it were the only opinion afloat. But who was Massey? Gerald Massey (1828-1907) was a self-taught Egyptologist. There were a lot of them running around during the 1800’s. While many praise Massey, no scholarly sources acknowledge his work. Massey was also a Spiritualist, which meant he had no hesitancy giving credence to gnostic thought and ideology. Massey was elected Chosen Chief of the Most Ancient Order of Druids from 1880 through 1906. This hardly makes him unbiased in his interpretations of historical content. If you want to know more about the “experts” most often cited by those who claim the story of Christ relates to Horus: http://www.canadianchristianity.com/cgi-bin/na.cgi?nationalupdates/040623. Now, to all you little bah-humbugites who want to pee in my cheerios, can it. Go learn a little about the myths and legends you’re trying to associate with my holiday.