Write Away

“WRITE AWAY” PROMISES TO BREAK WRITERS BLOCKADE Writer’s blockade may soon become a thing of the ASCII-age if the promise of a new drug proves true. A group of pharmaceutical performance artists collaborated with units of verse from the Creative Intelligence Anarchy to develop a new ambrosia to re-verse the scourge that has, at one time or another, stricken great writers and poets throughout the ages. Writer’s blockade strikes all languages regardless whether it’s left-to-right in Europe, right-toleft in Persia, top-to-bottom in China or every which way in Klingon. Jim Johnstone, of the Emerginista Poets Co-operative, was the lead researcher of the project. “This discovery could result in a global swarming of textual activity unprecedented in human history.” he told an impress conference in the Great Hall of the House of Uncommons. “Test results have been 99.99% effective. Side effects are minimal. Everything complied with the prime policy of poetry proliferation. It does not interfear with any of the entheogens that are recommended as a staple in the diets of accomplished poets.” Wally Keeler, Poetician 1 of the Peoples Republic of Poetry, said the final tests will be conducted with select units of verse from the poetariet over the next year. “If the results are the same as on previous test subjects, it will be made available as an over-the-counter drug as early as next year.” Ethical questions were raised at the impress conference concerning the use of the initial

test subjects; all were foreigners to the Peoples Republic of Poetry. The test subjects were all permanent residents of Bland Land. “The leading pulp frictioneers were willing subjects.” replied Poet Keeler. “As you know, they produce nothing of significance, so what harm would have been done to literature if anything went awry.” “Bland Land is overpopulated with mediocrity,” declared Douglas Curran, a well-known photographer for the Peoples Republic of Poetry. “It’s no loss to posterity.” Poet Johnstone explained that writer’s block also afflicted pulp frictioneers. “The challenge was quantity of output, not quality of output. That was our focus. If the drug worked on them, then it follows that it would be beneficial for Poetry.” Poet Keeler added, “It is preferable that negative side effects afflict the mediocre, rather than the highly tuned sensibilities of the Creative Class of the Imagine Nation, notably the poetariet of the Peoples Republic of Poetry,” “Only one clinic was set up in Bland Land. If anyone there suffered from writer’s block, they had to come to the clinic and ingest the drug on the premises. Once approved for production, the drug will not be exported, nor will any non-resident of Poetry be permitted to possess it.There’s more than enough mediocrity in the world without this drug expediting more.” Poet Johnstone, explained that the drug consists of an extract from Aspirin gently modified to

produce fantasylasalic acid, which is combined with equal portions of deliquescentual poetassium bicarbonate and love poetion #9 and #23. “There is a blending process that I will not reveal. Suffice to understand that I am at liberty not to say.” For the next year the drug will be available by prescription only to all registered members of the Warsaw Writers Bloc, a volunteer group dedicated to commiseration therapy. It is currently poetent pending. The Creative Intelligence Anarchy is expected to be the sole manufacturer and distributor of the drug under the brand name; WRITE AWAY.