Why And How I Reverted To Islam

\·bnte¡v ]mZbq¶nb Hcp "sX½mSn'

Rm³ Hcp sX½mSnXs¶bmbncp¶p! Fs³d PohnX¯n 1998 hscbpÅ A\v[Imc\n_nVambncp¶ \mfpIÄ F\n¡v ]IÀ¶v \ÂInbncp¶ Aht_m[w DÃkn¨v Pohn¡pI F¶Xv am{Xambncp¶p. AXn¶À°w CXcsc D]{Zhn¨v Pohn¡pI F¶Xmbncp¶nÃ. aZy]m\w, hy`nNmcw, kn\na, \mSI \r¯\mSy§fpsSbpw t£{XIeIfpsSbpsams¡ {]IS\]cXbn ap§ns¡mWvSncp¶p PohnXw. aäpÅhcpsS AwKoImcw XoÀ¯pw ]IÀ¶pIn«Wsa¶v B{Kln¨psImWvSpÅ {]hÀ¯\§Ä! FÃm PohnX {]hÀ¯\§fpsSbpw ]cyhkm\w aZy]m\¯nepw hy`nNmc kpJ¯nepw am{Xw. Cu sshIrX§sfÃmw t]dns¡mWvSncp¶t¸mgpw a \kn  Ft¸mgpw Hcp At\zjWapWvSmbncp¶p. Rms\´mWn§s\? ]n¶oSv, Rm\mcmWv? Rm³ FhnsS\n¶pw F´n\nhnsS h¶p? ]ncnaq¯ aZy]s³d a\kns³d A]Yk©mc§fmbncn¡msa¶v kzbw kam[m\n¡m³ {ian¨p. F¶m Nn´, At\zjWw Fs¶ apdpsI ]nSnIqSn. 1998 s]cn´Âa®bn \S¶ "sslµhX, Ckvemw ss{IkvXhXþkvt\lkwhmZw' kwKa¯n ]s¦Sp¯tXmsS Cu At\zjWXzc hfsctbsd hÀ²nXambn. XXvkwKa¯n ]s¦Sp¯ Nnecn apkvenw bph ]WvUnX·mcpsS Af¶papdn¨pÅ BZÀi {]t_m[\§fpw bpIvXn`{Zamb Ncn{X sXfnhpIfneqsS CkvemanImZÀi¯ns³d DÄ¡cp¯pw aäpw {ihn¨t¸mÄ tXm¶nþCu k\ymknamÀ¡pw ]mXncnamÀ¡pw X§fpsS hm¡pIÄ {ihn¡p¶htcmSv bmsXmcp IS¸mSpIfpw XoÀ¯pw CÃmsb¶v. ]n¶oSvAt§m«v Nn´¡pw At\zjW§Ä¡pw B¡w IqSn. BZyambn Rm³ Fs¶¡pdn¨v Xs¶bmWv Nn´n¨pXpS§nbXv. 1964se \hw_À amk¯n Ft¶m Hcp aqh´nt\c¯v ]nd¶phoWv Zmcn{Zy¯ns³dbpw kmapZmbnI D¨\oNXz§fpsSbpw sI«p]nWª Npäp]mSpIfn hfÀ¶v XpS§nb ssiihhpw _meyIuamc§fpw! hbÀ\nd¨v Blcn¡phm³ AbÂhmknIfpsS hS¡WnIÄ B{ibn¨ncp¶ A¡mebfhn ]nXmhnÂ\n¶pw e`n¡pI hÃt¸mgpw ho«n \S¶ncp¶ a{´hmZ ss]IrX§fn hnf¼nbncp¶ Nmcmbhpw IÅpw tImgnbnd¨nbpw am{Xw. ]Xns\m¶v hbkpImc³ ]¿\v hfÀ¶phcm³ ]änb tNcphIÄ! ]Ie´ntbmfw A\ycpsS ]mS¯pw ]d¼nepw A[zm\n¨v XfÀs¶¯p¶ amXmhn\v Iqenbmbn In«p¶ A ]w s\Ãv! AXmbncp¶p R§fpsS Blmc hkvXp. \nXyZmcn{Zy¯ns³d ]SpIpgnbnÂ, tNmÀs¶men¡p¶ ssht¡mÂ]pcbn A½tbmsSm¸w H«n¡nS¡pt¼mÄ Nnet¸msgms¡ AhtcmSv Rm³ tNmZn¨p. At½ \ap¡v am{Xambn«v F´mWn{X ZpcnXw? tX§epItfmsS I®oscmgp¡n hn[nsb ]gn¡Â am{Xambncp¶p A½bpsS adp]Sn.

A¡me§fn cm{Xn ASps¯hnsSsb§m\pw a{´hmZ IÀ½§fpWvSmhpt¼mÄ ANvOs³d IqsS Ip«bpw Xebnteän ]cnIÀ½nbmbn Rm\pw IqSpw. Fs³d e£yw Ipd¨v IpSn¡mw; Ipd¨v Ign¡mw; A{Xam{Xw. a{´hmZn F¶ \nebn ANvOs³d hociqc]cm{Ia§sfms¡ Ignbpt¼mtg¡pw cm{Xn hfsc Ccp«nbncn¡pw. A§s\ e`n¡p¶ IqenbnÂ\n¶pw \qdv cq] t\m«v A½bpsS I¿n sImSp¯n«v ANvO³ Hcp ap§vap§pw. ]n¶oSv At±ls¯ GsX¦nepw ]mShc¼¯v t_m[w \in¨ \nebn R§Ä "BËmZt¯msS, Aeapdbn«psImWvSv' ]nSn¨psImWvSphcpw. ]n¶oSt§m«v ]nXmhns³d XtXzm]tZi§fpsS s]cp¼dbmhpw apg§pI. Nnet¸mÄ A½bpsSbpw R§fpsSbpw apXpI¯pw! Fs³d Nn´]nt¶bpw ]ndtIm«v Xs¶...... IuamcIme¯v ASp¯ AbÂhmknIfpsS hnhml hoSpIfn kZy¡mhiyapÅ "Ce' apdn¨v IjW§fm¡n F¯n¡pI Fs³dbpw ANvOs³dbpw am{Xw D¯chmZn¯ambncp¶p. AXn\v {]Xn^ew Ipsd tNmdpw GXm\pw \mWb§fpw am{Xw. F¶mepw GXmWvSv kplr¯p¡fpsS hoSpIÄ ]cnNbs¸Sp¶ C¯cw "Ceapdn' Ahkc§fmbncn¡pw ]Tn¡Wsa¶ Nn´¡v B¡w Iq«nbXv. AhnsS\n¶pw e`n¡p¶ ]pkvXI§fmbncn¡pw AXn\v {]tNmZ\w. ANvOt\mSv A¶v C¡mcy§fpsS AXr]vXn t_m[ys¸Sp¯nbm Np« ASnbmbncn¡pw adp]Sn. kvIqÄ hnZym`ymkhpw tImtfPv hnZym`ymkhpw AXymhiyw ]cklmbt¯msSbpw ]«nIPmXn B\pIqey§tfmsSbpw Ipsdsbms¡ Ignªp. C\n ]Tn¨m ]co£bn hnPbn¡nà F¶v h¶t¸mÄ AhnsSsh¨v \nÀ¯n. A{X¡pWvSmbncp¶p aZy¯ns³dbpw aäv sX½mSn¯§fpsSbpw hcnªpsI«Â! XeapdIfpsS k¼mZyambn In«nb kz`mh sshinjvSyw! Fs³d At\zjWw hoWvSpw XpSÀ¶p. Fs¶¡pdn¨v Xs¶.... ]mXnhgnbn ]T\apt]£n¨v Rm³ ho«pImtcmSpÅ klhmkhpw GXmsWvSms¡ Dt]£n¨v hn¹h kwL§fpsSbpw hnZym`ymk imkv{XhnN£W·mcpsS {]NcW kwL§fpsSbpw ]ndsI t]mbn aSp¯t¸mÄ \mSphn«v Hcp sat{Sm \Kc¯nse¯n. AhnsS kzImcy kvYm]\§fn tPmen k¼mZn¨v e`n¡p¶ i¼fw amkw ]¯mw XobXn¡v ap¼pXs¶ \nc¸m¡pambncp¶p. amÀK§tfm, hneIqSnb aZy§fpw kpµcnItfmSpÅ AS§m¯ A`nhm©bpw!? AXn\nSbn amXm]nXm¡Ä thÀ]ncnªt¸mÄ A\pPt\bpw IqsS Iq«n. Hcp amk¯n\pÅnÂXs¶ A\pP\v Fs¶ a\knemhpIbpw R§Ä X½n \à \nebn ASn¨v ]ncnbpIbpw sNbvXp. B ]mhw F§ns\sbms¡tbm AhnsS Pohn¨v h¶s{X. ]m]]¦neamb Cu ImebfhmWv ssZhnIt_m[w ]IÀ ¶v \ÂInbXv. ]ivNm¯m] hnhibmbn almt£{X§Ä Ibdnbnd§pI ]Xnhm¡pIbpw sslµh ]pcmtWXnlmk§Ä hmbn¨v {Kln¡pIbpw sNbvXncp¶p. Hcp]mSv {_mlvaW kplr¯p¡Ä C¡mcy§fn Fs¶ klmbn¨n«papWvSv. ssZh

Nn´ \ÂInb DÄ¡cpt¯msSRm³ \m«n Xncns¨¯n. sXmgnenÃmbvabpsS Iq¯c§mb tIcf¯nse kpµcamb Hcp "{Kma\Kc'¯n IÅ¡W¡¸nÅ'bmbn Rm³ kzbw tkh\¯n GÀs¸ «p. At¸mÄ hoWvSpw e`n¨ [\amÀKhpw AwKoImchpw hoWvSpw hntZin kztZin hyXymkanÃmsX hbdp\nd¨v IpSn¨pÃkn¡m³ Fs¶ klmbn¨p. A¡mebfhn kpµcnIÄ ]ecpambpw "kvt\lw' ]q¯peªpsImtWvSbncp¶p. Ahkm\w B PohnX¯n\v ]qÀWhncmaw Ipdn¨v hnhmlw. ]ns¶ Ip«nIÄ. Ahscm¯v kt´mj{]Zhpw Bekyt¯msSbpw PohnXw Cgªp\o§n. AXn\nSbn Hcp cm{Xnbn Ip ªp§fpsS IpkrXn¯c§Ä¡nSbn Hcp BtemN\ IS¶ph¶p. Cu ]qap«pIfmb s]mt¶ma\Isf ]«nIPmXn¡mcmbn Pohn¸n¨v acn¸n¡Wtam? Nn´ apt¶m«v Xs¶.... H¶v \¶mbmse´m? F§s\ \¶mhWw? KoX hmbn¨v t\m¡nbt¸mÄ \nkzmÀ°ambn IÀ½w A\pjvTn¡Wsa¶ kmcw DÄs¡mWvSp. F¶m A§s\Xs¶ F¶v \nivNbn¨v IÀ½§Ä sNbvXv XpS§nbt¸mÄ hoWvSpw hnizmk BNmc§fnepw aäpw AkwXr]vXnbpw PohnX ZpcnX§fpw am{Xw _m¡n. ]ns¶ B Nn´ Dt]£n¨v ]p¯³ DWÀthmsS {]hr¯nIÄ sNbvXv XpS§nbt¸mÄ ZpcnX§Ä¡v hnS. ]s£, At¸mtg¡pw a\kn Hcp Xpemkv kvYm]nXambn¡gnªncp¶p. AXns³d X«pIÄ BSnbpeªpsImtWvSbncp¶p. A§s\ Rm³ ]sWvSt§m \nÀ¯nsh¨ hmb\ ]p\ÀPohn¸n¨p. hmb\ B[ymXvanIXbnte¡v \o§n. KoXbpw cmambWhpw Bbncp¶p "apJy·mÀ'. ]ns¶ ]q´m\w IrXnIfpw. A§s\bncns¡ Hcp\mÄ ]pXpXmbn {Kma\Kc¯n Bcw`n¨ apkvenw ]ÅnbnÂ\n¶pw Hcp apkvenw bph ]WvUnXs³d {]`mjWw tI«p. Rm\t¶cw AÂ]w "hoenÂ' Bbncp¶p. At±l¯ns³d hnjbtam aZy¯ns\Xncn Ckvemw ]Sp¯pbÀ¯nb {]Xntcm[¯ns³d tIm«bpw! {]kvXpX {]`mjW¯n Fs¶ No¯ hnfn¡pwt]mse Ipsd Bib§Ä Rms\mcp s]«n¡SbpsS Hmc¯p\n¶v tI«p. Ht¶m H¶ctbm aWn¡qÀ ZoÀLn¨ B {]`mjW¯n B bph ]WvUnXs³d \mhneqsS ]pdt¯¡v HgpInb hnPvRm\w Ncn{X, imkv{X kmaqlnI kmwkv¡mcnIamb kakvX aWvUe§tfbpw khnkvXcw {]Xn]mZn¡p¶ H¶mbncp¶p. AhnSp¶t§m«v Ckvemw hnaÀin¡s¸Sp¶ Hcp aXw am{XaÃmsb¶pw AXv ]Tn¡s¸tSWvSp¶ Hcp XXzZÀi\amWv F¶pw F\n¡v DÅn tXm¶n. ]n¶oSpÅ \mfpIfn au\ambn Ckvemans\ ]cnNbs¸Sm³ XpS§n. AXn\ptijw ssl¡Â FgpXnb "apl½Zv' F¶ IrXn hmbn¨p. AXv C¶pw ]cn]qÀ®ambn HcmhÀ¯n ]qÀ¯nbm¡m³ F\n¡v km[n¨n«nÃ. Hmtcm {]Xn]mZ\§fneqsSbpw a\kv t]mhpt¼mgpw Fs³d I®pIÄ \ndsªmgpIpw. Chs¡ms¡ {]tNmZ\w

\ÂInbtXmþs]cn´Âa®bn \S¶ "sslµhX, Ckvemw, ss{IkvXhXþkvt\lkwhmZw' ]cn]mSnbpw AXnse {]Xn]mZy hnjb§fpw. ]n¶oSv At§m«v Rm³ Fs³d kz`mh¯n kzbw ]cnhÀ¯\w hcp¯n¯pS§n. `KhXvKoX ]ehpcp hmbn¨n«v AXnepÅ s]mcpfpw a\pjyPohnXhpw X½n ]pe_\v[wt]mepanÃmsb¶v t_m[ys¸«p. IYbdnbmsX B«w ImWp¶hcmbn KoXm\pbmbnIÄ amdns¡mWvSncp¶t¸mÄ AhtcmSv a\kv sImWvSv kemwsNmÃn. hn. JpÀB³ ]cn`mj ssI¡em¡n. Hcp Im¡ ]dªp; CXv \n§Ä¡v sXmSm³ ]äqÃtÃm; "Rm³ Ct¸mÄ sXm«pt]mbntÃ; C\nsbm¶v t\m¡s«'; F¶v Rm\pw. tijw cWvSv aq¶v A[ymb§Ä hmbn¨t¸mÄ a\knembn CsXm¶pw F\n¡v a\knemhp¶nÃmsb¶v. A§s\ kvIqfnte¡v ]pds¸«p. JpÀB³ teWnwKv kvIqÄ! ssZh¯ns³dbpw a\pjys³dbpw \nÀhN\w bYmÀ°¯n F´v F¶v a\knem¡m¯ Rm³ B ¢mkpIfn {i²n¨Xpw {ihcn¨Xpamb hnPvRm\w kXy{]Imi¯nte¡pÅ t\À]mXIfmbncp¶p. AXnÂ\n¶pw thZ§Ä X½n NnebnS§fn IqSnt¨cp¶pWvSv F¶ kXyw Rm³ a\Ênem¡n. DZm: C{µw an{Xw hcpW aKv\n amlpþ ctYmZnhyx kp]Àt®mKcpXvam³ GIw kZvhn {hm_lp[mhZ´n AKv\nw baw amXcnizm\amlp: (EtKzZ `mjyw) (]cws]mcpÄ C{µ³, an{X³, hcpW³, AKv\n F¶n§s\ hyhlcn¡s¸Sp¶p. tim`mbam\amb NndIpIfpÅ KcpV\pw Ah\s{X. ]camÀ°hkvXp GI\mWv. Cu t]cpIfn XXzw IWvShÀ Ahs\ ]e {]Imc¯n hÀWn¡p¶p). A§s\ GI ssZh hnizmkw Xs¶bmWv lnµpXz¯ns³d ImX F¶XpsImWvSv ]ns¶ F´n\v asäm¶v F¶ Nn´bpw DS¡n. A§s\ asämcp kqIvXw {i²bn h¶p. AXv hnip² JpÀB\nt³dXmbncp¶p. ""JpÂlphÃmlp AlZv AÃmlp kaZv ew benZv hew bqeZv hew bJp³elp Jp^ph³ AlZv'' (]dbpI; {]hmNIsc: Imcyw AÃmlp GI\t{X. AÃmlp kÀÆÀ¡pw B{ibambn«pÅh³ Ah³ Btcbpw P\n¸n¨n«nÃ; Ah³ (k´m\ambn) P\n¨n«panà Ah\v Xpeyambn BcpanÃXm\pw). CXnÂ\n¶pw ssZhw Bcv F¶pw Ahs³d KpWhntij§Ä F´v F¶pw F\n¡v t_m[yambn. tZhotZh·mÀ a\pjya\kpIfpsS krjvSncq]w {]m]n¨hbmWv F¶pw Ahsb

Bcm[n¨v Pohn¨v acn¨m Rm³ h¶ temI¯v F¯nt¨cm³ IgnbpIbnÃmsb¶pw F\n¡v D¯a t_m[yw h¶p. am{Xtam alm \nÀhmW kvt{Xm{X¯n hmbn¡pI: XtZIw kvacmakvXtZIw P]malx XtZIw PKXvkm£n cq]w \amalx XtZIw \n[m\w \ncmew_aow `hmw t`mXn t]mXw icWyw {]Pm ax (H¶mb \ns¶ am{Xw kvacn¡s«. GI\mb \ns³d \ma§Ä P]n¡s«. PKXvkm£nbpw kzcq]\pamb B GIs\ \akv¡cn¡s«. kXmam{Xhpw Htcsbmcp B{ib kvYm\hpw Xncm[mchpw `hkmKcw IS¡phm³ klmbn¡p¶ XcpWnbpamb GI ssZhs¯ Rm³ icWw {]m]n¡p¶p). CXns\ ]cnip² JpÀB³ JWvUn¡p¶Xv ImWpI: h AkvkzÀ C¶Â C³km\ e^oJpkvkzÀ CÃÃZo\ Ba\q hAanepkzmenlm¯n hXhmku _n lJn h¯hmku _nkz_vÀ (Imew Xs¶bmWv kXyw. XoÀ¨bmbpw a\pjy³ \jvS¯n Xs¶bmIp¶p. hnizkn¡pIbpw k¡À½§Ä A\pjvTn¡pIbpw kXywsImWvSv At\ym\yw D]tZin¡pIbpw £a ssIs¡mÅm³ ]ckv]cw D]tZin¡pIbpw sNbvXhÀ HgnsI). CÆnZapÅ ]ckv]c hniIe\¯nÂ\n¶pw XmcXay ]T\¯nÂ\n¶pw F\n¡v ]S¨ X¼pcm³ k½m\n¨ Aam\¯v (Aaqey\n[n) BWv Ckvemw. `mcytbmSv k½Xw tNmZn¨t¸mÄ ]oU\§fpsSbpw am\knImLmX§fpsSbpw tIfocwKambn PohnXw \o§nbt¸mÄ, AhcpambpÅ _\v[w thÀs¸«p. AhcpsS ]I t]m¡epIÄ ¡v B¡w hÀ[n¨psImWvSncp¶t¸mÄ Rm³ \S¶p\o§nbtXm s]m¶m\nbnte¡pw. hnip²amb XuloZnte ¡v. {]hmNI³ apl½Zv apkvX^m (k) {]t_m[\w sNbvX XuloZnte¡v. ]ivNm¯m] t_m[t¯msS ]m]]¦neamb a\kpambn asämcp \njvIf¦\mb a\pjys³d ]pXp¸ndhnbnte¡v! AXv asämcp Ncn{Xw. hmbn¡p¶htcmSv Hcp hm¡v: kXymt\z jW XÂ]ccmb \n§Ä kwip²ambXpw bpIvXn`{Zhpamb, IdIfª XuloZnte¡v IS¶phcphn³. Fs³d Cu enJnXw Fs´¦nepw {]tNmZ\w \ÂIpsa¦n Rm³ IrXmÀ°\mbn. kÀÆtemI ]cn]meI\pw cmPm[ncmP\pamb c£nXmhv \s½ Ghscbpw A\p{Kln¡pamdmIs«; Bao³. F. F¨v lmcnkv, Xmsgt¡mSv, s]cn´Âa®