Vegas 2009

This is a trip report I wrote for the website tripadvisor.com. I didn’t think there was any point modifying it from the original, as it got rave reviews on the website, so here it is below. As I write this, it was my last trip to America, February 2009. As an overture to this trip report, I will give you a brief outline. I was asked to go to Vegas with my friend R who is going through quite a rough divorce, he needed some time away and had never been to Vegas before so he asked me, a seasoned Vegas traveller if I wanted to go with. I had to help a friend in need...well that’s the excuse I gave my wife anyway!! Day 1 We arrived at Manchester airport at around 6am for our 9am flight as I had convinced myself that the usual check in nightmare would take ages as it usually does. Not today. We were checked in and through security within 10 minutes so it was off to the cafe for some overpriced breakfast. It was the choice of either a Danish pastry for £3 or a full breakfast for £8, I opted for the Snickers from WH Smith for 62p. After hanging around for some time, the flight was called to board and we were away. The flight was long (11 Hours), completely uneventful, the films were boring and the food was atrocious. Touch down in Vegas and we manage to get through security fairly quickly after having hands, thumbs, fingers and eye prints taken. Something that has always puzzled me is that why is it when two people check in together, surely their bags go on to the plane at the same time....how is it then that my bag came off second and R’s came off dead last!! Eventually we got our bags and made our way out to the taxi stand where at least 200 people were waiting. Knowing how things work in Vegas I spotted a limo driver standing around so I asked him if any limos were available. He told me that his pick up hadn’t arrived so he was available; he was only in a town car and said that he would take us to the hotel for $30 so we jumped in and off we went. We took the number of the driver as we needed to do some running around on the Friday and it would be cheaper for the two of us to pay by the hour rather than get a cab. I have not been to Vegas since March 2007 and I made him drive up the strip so I could see what changes had been made. I noticed lots of half built properties where they had lost funding and had to stop construction, it indicated that even Las Vegas is struggling under these financially hard times....or is it? We pulled up at the Encore, I usually stay at the Wynn but we got a very good deal at the Encore so we gave it a go. Check in was easy, the main reception desk was quiet but they have a problem, it is an open desk system where you just stand and wait to be called to the desk, no lines, no barriers, this seemed to confuse a lot of people. I asked the girl on the desk if we could have a strip facing room on a high floor as I didn’t see the value to paying an extra $50 a night for a tower suite room that is no bigger than a standard suite. We got a fantastic room on the 55th floor with an outstanding view of the strip...and no $20 trick needed. (Tip the check in staff $20 and they may upgrade you) R was already at this stage completely overwhelmed by the whole Vegas experience so far and had never stayed in a hotel anything like this before. It was now around 2pm and we were hungry. We had a walk to the Mirage as I wanted to take R to the Carnegie Deli as he had never been to one before. I had pre-warned R not to over order as the sandwiches were massive. R decided to ignore me and not only did he order the 'Woody Allen',

the biggest sandwich on the menu, he also ordered two starters as he was hungry. For those of you who have never been to the Carnegie Deli, the 'Woody Allen' is a sandwich made up of around 3 pounds of meat, half pastrami and half corned beef, delicately placed between two tiny pieces of bread. I ordered a small version of the same sandwich of which I only ate half, it was huge. R ate the lot. Unbelievable. We needed a decent walk after eating all that so we wandered across the road to Casino Royale as I wanted to play craps. I usually just play Pai Gow but fancied a game of craps and you can play there for $3 minimum. I couldn’t even get close to the table so we both had a game of blackjack. I'm not going to get into figures won and lost as I think that is a personal thing but suffice to say over the whole trip we both managed to win a little, nothing major but something is better than nothing! We played for about 40 minutes at which time I had my first Bud Light of the trip, you cant seem to get it in Manchester so I love it whenever I go and can get it on draft. After this, we wandered up through the Venetian, as I wanted to see the Palazzo as it hadn’t been finished on my last visit. It’s nice inside but the shops are ridiculous, I tried on a hoodie and nearly bought it until I saw the price tag $1970. Nearly two grand for a hoodie, obviously there is still money to be spent in Vegas as the shop was packed with paying customers. We were getting a bit tired after the long flight and lunch so we decided to cross the walkway from the Palazzo to the Wynn and cut through to the Encore to have a chill out. R was chomping at the bit to play on the tables at the Encore so I left him playing blackjack and I went to the room. I had a nice long shower and then laid on the bed for a while. The next thing I knew, it was around 7.30pm and R was back in the room getting changed as we had a reservation at Mon Ami Gabi where I had managed to get us a table outside overlooking the Bellagio fountains. We got there early and had a few pre dinner drinks before our steaks arrived. Food was fantastic as usual, huge steak and chips, no complaints. We got a cab back to the Encore and whilst I was playing Pai Gow, R went to speak to the concierge, as he wanted to see Barry Manilow on Friday night. He managed to get tickets 3 rows from the stage. I am not a big fan, but I thought I better succumb to my feminine side and see the show. 3am and about 9 Jameson’s later I stumbled back to the room and fell asleep.

Day 2 We got up on the Friday morning at round 8am, didn’t really get much sleep as R snores like a tractor. It was horrendous; imagine being locked in a room with a chainsaw. First stop was the Terrace Point Cafe at the Wynn, I always have breakfast here when I am in Vegas as I love the pancakes. As per normal they arrived at the table, 3 over sized pancakes with 2 jugs of maple syrup...really good for a diabetic like me!! R wanted an English breakfast...in America. He had 3 eggs, sausages, tomato and a side of bacon. Not surprisingly he finished it all and I left half of mine...this became a common occurrence.

Our driver arrived at the main entrance at 10am so we jumped into the car and it was off to our first stop of the day. The Gun Store. I had heard from other people that it was very expensive to shoot at the gun store so was a bit hesitant, but I had always wanted to give it a go as I have always had a bit of a gun fetish. The last time I fired a pistol I was about 14 in the junior cadets at school so some time has passed. R had never even held a gun let alone fired one. We walked into the gun store to see an array of assault rifles, shotguns, handguns, submachine guns and much much more. R didn’t really know what to choose and was a bit apprehensive so I chose a Sig Sauer P226 for him, a small standard automatic handgun, I knew he would be able to handle it. He went on the range first and after some instruction he fired 20 shots into his target. He got all the shots into the target, which he was really pleased about, maybe it was because the target was about 3 feet away from him!! It was then my turn; I started off with a pump action 12-bore shotgun, 5 rounds into the target. I had forgot how much it kicks back into your shoulder from some clay pigeon shooting I did years ago. Next up was the Glock 19, 9mm, I managed to get all 20 of my rounds into the target, some distance away. Lastly I had chosen something I had wanted to fire for some time, a Desert Eagle .50, when I held it I was petrified, it was so heavy, I could hardly get my hand around the grip, I then noticed the size of the rounds compared to the 9mm and it was frightening but I thought when in Vegas....I put in the magazine, clicked the slide forward and squeezed the trigger slowly....BANG....I didn’t expect this amount of power and the gun nearly jumped out of my hand. The instructor told me to take a more aggressive stance with it and to just hold it tightly or it would snap my wrist...thanks. I shot the remaining rounds into the target and surprisingly got them all in the centre. By this time my hand was now vibrating and stunk of gunpowder. The whole shooting experience cost me $69.36 + Tax. I think this is very cheap for the entertainment the gun store provides. OK so if you want to fire an M16 machine gun it will cost $50 but it doesn’t have to be so expensive. Back into the car and off to the Premium Outlet Mall. Not going to bore you with shopping details but bought some designer jeans for $29 a pair and some Timberland boots for $60. A lot cheaper than the Palazzo!!! From there we went downtown as R wanted to see it. I hate that area of Vegas but as it was R's first time it would have been wrong of me not to go. He wasn’t too impressed. We got the driver to drop us back at the hotel so we could drop off our bags, have a freshen up and then we went across the road to the Fashion Show Mall as I was under instruction from my wife to buy her an Abercrombie Hoodie. Whatever it costs in the UK in Pounds, it costs the same in Dollars, so a hoodie that costs £60 here cost me $60 there so a little bit cheaper. I got some other bits for the kids and myself and then we went for a quick bite to eat in the food court. I had a Nathans hot dog with cheese and chilli and R had the same, with fries and then got a Triple Burger from Wendy's as he was still a bit hungry!! Now...I am going to gloss over the details for the next bit but suffice to say that I spent the afternoon playing poker whilst R spent an hour in the room with a 'Vegas Companion'. I did hang around reception just to see what she was like and I was very impressed.

Eventually R came to find me to let me know I could now go back to the room. I got cleaned up and ready to go and see Mr Manilow. We jumped in a cab to the Las Vegas Hilton and picked up our tickets from the box office. Our seats were 3 rows from the front so we had a really good view. The show was very good, about 90 minutes long but he started with all the slow stuff so 10 minutes into it R was asleep and snoring like a chainsaw, I had to keep nudging him to wake up, he must have slept through the first half of the show, maybe his Vegas companion tired him out? The show was fantastic, I am not the biggest Manilow fan but I have to admit that he is the consummate performer and entertainer, he can still hit the high notes and he really plays to the audience, BUT he looks weird, he is so thin and has had so much plastic surgery he looks like a waxwork, a bit like David Copperfield. The show finished and we got a cab back to the Encore to get some dinner, we looked at all the restaurants in the Encore but they were far too expensive so we walked through into the Wynn and went to Red 8. I had eaten here before so knew it would be good. After some dim sum chicken with chilli I went to bed, I was absolutely nackered. R stayed downstairs playing cards till about 2am I think. Day 3 We got up fairly late on Saturday morning, as we were shattered from the night before. I had to nip back to Abercrombie at the mall to exchange a t-shirt I’d bought the prior day but although they were supposed to open at 10am, they didn’t, so we decided to have a walk to the Mirage to get some breakfast at Carnegie Deli and I would just do the exchange at the store in the Forum Shops. We arrived at Carnegie Deli at about 10.30 so it was a fairly late breakfast. Luckily there was no line so we got straight in and sat down. By now you should be able to anticipate what is coming next...I ordered some orange juice and some eggs and sausage. I was then asked, how would you like the eggs...poached, I said...and would you like fries or home fries (breakfast potatoes)....fries for breakfast, maybe not, its just wrong. I declined on the fries and was given a look of disbelief by the server....toast, white, rye, pumpernickel, with seeds, without seeds....I just want toast, not questions, toast. There seemed to be options for everything. Here's the bit you have all been waiting for. R ordered some orange juice also and a hot tea, he had 3 eggs sunny side up, sausages, fries, tomato and a side of bacon which was more like a side of the whole pig there was so much of it. It was devoured with much haste and zeal. We went into the Forum Shops as R wanted to see the cheesecake factory...shock horror...he was immediately amazed by the circular escalators there. We did the usual wandering round the shops, saw Pete Rose signing autographs, he must have been there for years, I see him every time. I managed to get some good bargains for the kids; some of the clothes were reduced by 60%, even the Ed Hardy stuff. I also decided to buy my wife a small gift from Tiffany’s, as she never complains when I go away and I thought it would be a nice present. R was gutted at the length of the line at the Cheesecake Factory so we bypassed that and walked back into the casino to play a bit of blackjack at the Pussycat Dolls tables. These are standard tables but all the dealers are exceptionally attractive and very scantily clad, maybe this is to put gamblers off…or to turn them on? We both won about $100 here but I was more impressed when my Bud Light came in a metal bottle...doesn't take much to impress me does it?

We stayed in Caesars until about 2pm and R was getting hungry so we jumped in a cab and went to Maggianos at the Fashion Show Mall. We got a seat outside fairly quickly so that was good. Same script different restaurant, I left half of mine, R ate the lot. If you want good inexpensive Italian food then eat at Maggianos, its not one of the pretentious eateries like Bartolotta at the Wynn where it costs $30 for soup, it costs $3.50 for soup. My lasagne could have fed 4 people and was $13. Well worth the money, highly recommended by me!! Back to the hotel for a few hours to relax, have a few drinks and a bit of a gamble, I had a slight disaster and managed to lose quite a lot in this session which put me in a bit of a foul mood, combine this with the fact that when I got back up to the room, R had the chainsaw out again so back down to the bar I went to soak up some of the black cloud above me. Hang on....just referring to some notes I jotted down so I wouldn't forget things. It was now about 8pm, I thought I better go back up to the room and see what was going on, what a shock, R was still chopping wood. I shoved him to wake him up and might have shoved him a little too hard as he woke up with a jump and fell off the bed. I forgot to mention, he had a shower before he laid on the bed so was just wearing a towel. When he fell off the bed, the towel fell off and I was treated to a sight I never wish to see again...my eyes nearly bled. Taxi....and off to MGM we went, we hadn’t been down that end of the strip so I thought I better show him before we went home the following morning. R was impressed with the size of the MGM. I don’t really like this hotel, I find it too big and impersonal. As per usual the lions were just laying there, docile and drugged up. Across the walkway to NYNY, I like this place and it seemed to have had a bit of a clean up recently. I considered getting one of those 3-foot long drinks in a plastic empire state building but then realised it was a little bit too touristy so didn’t bother, I just had a small one instead. We played Pai Gow here for a couple of hours and I managed to claw back some of my earlier losses. Along came R, he was hungry and wanted to get some dinner, it was around 11pm and some of the restaurants had already closed so we went back into the MGM and got something to eat at the Rainforest Cafe. It took quite a while for our food to arrive but during this time I managed to get some entertainment. R fell asleep at the table and out came Mr Chainsaw, it was that loud that other diners were pointing and laughing. I just sat there and filmed it all on my phone...I am passed getting embarrassed by it. Eventually R woke up when the food arrived, steak, prawn and ribs, it was very nice actually. R certainly enjoyed it! We got a cab back to the hotel and R went straight to bed, I stayed in the casino and played Pai Gow until 4am, I was on a mission to get back what I had lost earlier. At around 4.20am I was at the cash desk and I had got back what I had lost and won a little bit more so I felt a bit better!! Day 4 After my late night I was fairly tired and only got about 3 hours sleep, as we had to be up early. We had to be at the airport at 11am to check in for our flight home. R woke up before me this morning, maybe it was my silence and lack of snoring that disturbed him a little? We both showered, not together I must add, and then made our way downstairs and into the Wynn for the breakfast buffet.

It was only when we got to the cash desk that I realised it was Sunday and it was champagne brunch day, my $18 breakfast had just shot up to $34 but in truth after standing in line for 20 minutes, I was just glad to get sat down, I was starving. Maybe it was just me, but I didn’t actually realise what a brunch was, not only do they serve the standard breakfast items such as eggs, bacon and bagels; they also serve the whole lunch buffet menu. This includes a vast array of foods from around the globe, dim sum, pizza, rib-eye steak, massive king prawns that looked like Andre the Giants fingers and the largest selection of fancy cakes and pastries quite inappropriate for breakfast!! I will actually go into some detail about what we both had, and it won’t really surprise you by now, I ate slightly less than R did. My first trip to the buffet counter was for some fruit, pink grapefruit to be exact which was topped with seaweed, Chinese seaweed, don’t know why but it just was, so I scraped it off and continued with the fruit. I followed it up with some sausage (1) some bacon slices (2) and an egg Benedict. On the side I had a croissant. Coffee and Orange Juice and that was it. Done. R on the other hand wanted to sample the global cuisine, he started with bacon, eggs and sausages. Essentially this was half a pig and the eggs from maybe 100 chickens, the plate was not unlike the volcano outside the Mirage. He followed this up with some pizza slices, a large slice of rib-eye, fried chicken wings and a pile of smoked salmon. Quite a variation. Course 3 became an eye opener, all 40 of Andre’s fingers were on his plate, doused in not only cocktail sauce but blue cheese dressing. Both the look of it and the stench was foul. Now it was time for dessert, every variation of cake, cookie and muffin were piled onto a plate next to a big bowl of pistachio ice cream covered in crushed nuts. (Insert world famous crushed nuts joke here!!). This was washed down with tea, orange juice and a bloody mary. R said to me, “That will do until we get to the airport, I hope they have a Burger King there”. After breakfast, R went back to the room, maybe to throw up, but who knows? I went to check out and to see what they would comp us with as I reckoned we’d earned a fair amount from our play. I was quite surprised when they only offered to comp the internet access. I asked to see a manager and after telling him about my disappointment with regards to the cleanliness of the bathroom and the lack of free slippers, he comped the remainder of the stuff on the bill. It wasn’t much, $107 and they made such an issue of it. I reckoned we had earned as much as $500 in comps through our play but the manager kept using the same phrase over and over again…”Cost cutting measures”. Stop giving out double drinks to people for free then, that will cut costs, you don’t need cashmere pillow cases or 300 chandeliers, maybe you can save a few dollars there?? We got our bags and went outside for a cab, there was no line so we got a cab straight away. The driver actually asked us whether he should take the highway or the surface streets. Considering it was a Sunday morning I told him to take the surface streets just for one more drive up the strip. We got to the airport in minutes and after R had smoked his way through about 6 cigarettes outside the terminal we went and checked in. Check in was uneventful and we went straight to security as it can take an eternity to get through, that’s why we got to the airport early. No Line. I was ushered to one side and asked to take off my shoes and they were scanned with a hand scanner, this doesn’t bother me as long as there is no line. I walked through the scanner and for the

first time in a long time it went off. The security guy asked me “Do you have anything metal in your pockets?”, “Only some coins” I said. He then gave me the most patronising, condescending line I have ever had said to me. “Well son, this is a metal detector, and coins are made from….”. He never reached the last word as I quickly shut him up with a “F*&^ You” and just put the coins into the tray and walked through. As I walked through, he starting singing 3 coins in a fountain to me. I ignored him. We had a quick look around the duty free shops but there was nothing entertaining for me to buy, R on the other hand bought the biggest bag of jelly beans in existence. Time was getting on and our flight was about to board. Knowing what the food is like on bmi, I went to Burger King and got a Whopper, no onion, tomato or pickle…see there is a cost cutting measure, don’t put pickle on burgers, nobody likes it. R waited for me to come back and he got his, Triple Whopper with cheese, fries and a bucket of Coke. He ate his straight away, I waited and got the cabin crew to heat it up for me when I was ready to eat it. We boarded about 10 minutes later and luckily there were only the 2 of us on our row of 4 seats so I shoved R over to the other end so I could stretch out a bit. We took off and around 10 minutes into the flight we had the worst turbulence I had ever experienced. I am quite a good traveller but this was bad, my whole body was starting to be covered in a layer of sweat and I was getting a bit edgy, the turbulence was so bad that the pilot had to do a complete 360 degree detour whilst climbing to avoid it, banking over very hard. Didn’t like that bit very much. R didn’t mind the turbulence, he was asleep already and the chainsaw was starting to murmur. People from 6 rows in front were turning round to see what the noise was. I just put my iPod on, turned it up as loud as possible and sat there. As expected the food was inedible, cheese pasta apparently, covered in peas and broccoli. We then got ‘Breakfast’ about an hour before landing; this was a croissant which could have been used to chock the planes wheels, and a peach yoghurt. Eventually we landed back in Manchester, back to the cold, the wind and the rain. The memories of this trip will surely live on for a while.