Types Of Conflict
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Managing Conflict Types of conflict
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN CONFLICT IS BADLY MANAGED or IGNORED?????????????????
WHEN CONFLICT IS BADLY MANAGED or IGNORED, the following often occurs...
anxiety withdrawal Procrastination helplessness Confusion Denial separation escalation polarization loneliness
anger loss of productivity resentment high blood pressure stress tiredness Illness broken crockery
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN CONFLICT IS MANAGED SKILLFULLY……..
WHEN CONFLICT IS MANAGED SKILLFULLY, the results are different. a sense of achievement a sense of smooth running
comfort Fun vitality happiness openness Efficiency feeling of power relief comradeship
a sense of expansion Teamwork change Growth expanded relationships Peace relaxation good health restful sleep
Class Activity: Name Types of Conflict We Face…………….
A road map to identifying five types of conflict: Information Conflicts
Perceived Conflicts
Data Interest Conflicts Conflicts Relationship Structural Conflicts Value Conflicts Conflicts
Structural Conflicts
External Conflicts
Types of conflict
By evaluating these five categories of conflict – we can begin to determine the causes of a conflict and design resolution strategies that will have a higher probability of success.
Data Conflicts Relation ship Conflict s
Interest Conflicts
Value Conflicts
Structural Conflicts
Data aka Information conflicts caused by:
Data conflicts occur when people;
Lack information necessary to make wise decisions,
Misinformation,
Disagreements on the relevancy of information,
Different Interpretation of information
Some data conflicts may be unnecessary since they are caused by poor communication between the people in conflict.
While others may be genuine incompatibilities associated with data collection, interpretation or communication. (WTO,UNO…)
Receiver Responsibilities
A plumber wrote to the National Bureau of Standards to tell them hydrochloric acid is good for cleaning out clogged drains.
A technical specialist wrote back: the efficacy of hydrochloric acid is indisputable, but the corrosive residue is incompatible with metallic permanence.
We cannot assume responsibility for the production of toxic and noxious residue with hydrochloric acid, and suggest you use an alternative procedure.
Finally, Manager wrote: Don’t use hydrochloric acid. It eats the hell out of pipes.
A Shared Semantic Code
My My World of World of Experiences Words
My Semantic Code
Your Your World of World of Words Experiences
Your Semantic Code
Exercise 2: FUZZY MEANINGS
OBJECTIVE: to illustrate the wide range of meanings which are often attached to common words and phrases in our language.
PROCEDURE: Look at the list of commonly used words and phrases like the following that characterize different degrees or frequencies of events and tell us what they mean to you…………..
FUZZY MEANINGS Often Always
100%
Sometimes Never Usually Most of the time Occasionally Seldom A lot Almost Rarely Frequently Quite often
please specify a number from 0 to 100 that, best indicates the amount (percentage) of time that each word conveys.
FUZZY MEANINGS Often
On regular basis
Always
Ceaselessly
Sometimes
Once in a while
Never
Not at all
Usually
More often than not
Most of the time
More often than not
Occasionally
Seldom
Seldom
Hardly ever
A lot
Plenty
Almost Always
Nearly every time
Rarely
Once in a blue moon
Frequently
Regularly
Quite often
Fairly regularly
Ways to address data conflicts:
Most data conflicts will have "data solutions."
Reach agreement on what information is important. and relevant
Agree on information collection process (primary & secondary research)
Develop common criteria to assess information. (how two parties to a contract interpret information)
Use third-party experts to get outside opinion or break deadlock.
Relationship conflicts caused by:
Relationship conflicts occur because of the presence of
Misperceptions or stereotypes, All Motorcyclists are Hells Angels. All Muslims are terrorists. All Lawyers are crooks.
Poor communication or miscommunication,
Repetitive negative behaviors I don't care I don't give a damn I don't want to hear.
Strong negative emotions, •
Don’t judge emotions.
•
No one’s feelings are more or less “right” than the other’s.
•
Emotions reflect a valid perspective of an individual. Even if you don’t understand it, acknowledge the other person’s reaction as important.
•
Relationship problems often fuel disputes and lead to an unnecessary escalating spiral of destructive conflict.
Ways to address relationship conflicts:
Supporting the safe and balanced expression of perspectives and emotions for acknowledgment is one effective approach to managing relational conflict.
Ways to address relationship conflicts:
Control negative expressions
Promote process that legitimizes feelings.
Clarify perceptions - build positive perceptions.
Improve quality and quantity of communication.
Block negative behavior by changing structure. (Exercise)
Encourage positive problem-solving attitudes.
Exercise: Changing Negative to Positive 1.
“I have a problem at work.”
2.
“You never take me anywhere. We always stay home and watch TV.”
3.
“You should have worked on that management report instead of filing papers.”
4.
“You were really bad for missing work when we had a deadline to meet.”
5.
“One of his faults that drives me crazy, is that his desk is always a mess.”
6.
“You made a mistake.”
PROBLEMS become SITUATIONS
A negative statement “I have a problem at work.”
Contrast this with the more positive, “I have a difficult situation at work.”
A problem seems as though it is stuck to you and will always be there.
A situation, on the other hand, seems temporary and solvable.
ALWAYS and NEVER become OFTEN and SELDOM
A negative statement, “You never take me anywhere. We always stay home and watch TV.”
Contrast this with the more positive, “ Since we seldom go out in the evenings, and we're often so tired we just watch TV, I get frustrated. I would love to have a special evening out with you. Can we plan one together?”
Always and never are negative words because they are rarely true and exaggerate a situation. Since they are usually used to criticize, people feel attacked and become defensive.
In the second statement, however, you are explaining your own feelings and desires, so there is no need for your partner to get defensive, and you are more likely to get your wish – an enjoyable evening out.
SHOULD HAVE becomes COULD A negative statement, “You should have worked on that HAVE management report instead of filing papers.”
Contrast this with the more positive, “You could have worked on that management report instead of filing papers.”
Using the words, should have, creates guilt and shame for something that has already been done and cannot be changed,
whereas the words, could have, don't condemn anyone. They let someone know he or she had a choice, and this experience then becomes a lesson for making better choices in the future.
BAD becomes UNWISE
A negative statement, “You were really bad for missing work when we had a deadline to meet.”
Contrast this with the more positive “Missing work when we had a deadline to meet was not a wise decision. The rest of us had to work overtime. Would you please find a way to make it up to us.”
Using the word, bad, is a judgment of a person's character, and causes resentment. On the other hand, using the word,
unwise, refers to the natural consequences of the person's actions, and doesn't judge a person's basic character.
FAULTS become DIFFERENCES
A negative statement, “One of his faults that drives me crazy, is that his desk is always a mess.”
Contrast this with the more positive, “One of the differences between us is that he keeps his desk messy, while I get frustrated unless everything is put in its place.”
In using the word, faults, you are judging someone's actions as right or wrong.
Using the word, differences, removes the critical tone, because you are pointing out how you are different, not that one person is right or wrong.
MISTAKES become VALUABLE LESSONS
A negative statement, “You made a mistake.”
Contrast this with the more positive, “There is a valuable lesson in what you did.”
The first way makes others feel ashamed of what they did, and will probably inhibit them from trying new things in the future.
The second way gives others something positive to do – to learn from their actions, thereby encouraging learning and experimentation.
The bottom line is that words can either be destructive or enriching to your relationships with other people.
So, before you allow the words to simply flow out of your mouth without considering what they mean, remember this one very important word -
THINK.
Value conflicts caused by:
Value conflicts are caused by perceived or actual incompatible belief systems.
Values are beliefs that people use to give meaning to their lives. Values explain what is "good" or "bad," "right" or "wrong," "just" or "unjust."
Differing values need not cause conflict.
Beliefs are not true. They are constructs around which we organize our behaviors. So we each behave as though our beliefs were true. (Conservatives vs. liberals)
What are attitudes? "A settled opinion, or way of thinking"
Attitudes - we can only infer them from a person’s behavior
They are attributes of personality
Values are deeply held beliefs about what is good, right, and appropriate.
Values are deep-seated and remain constant over time.
We accumulate our values from childhood based on teachings and observations of our parents, teachers, religious leaders, and other influential and powerful people.
Example: Maria felt stressed out and didn't know what to do when her boss implied she should lie to a client; honesty is one of Maria’s most deeply held values.
Value conflicts caused by:
People can live together in harmony with different value systems.
Value disputes arise only when;
people attempt to force one set of values on others or (TALIBAN, the WEST, etc.)
lay claim to exclusive value systems that do not allow for divergent beliefs.
Ways to address value conflicts:
Reframing Third parties can sometime help the disputants to redefine or reframe their conflict, focusing more on attainable interests and less on nonnegotiable positions. Dialogue Dialogue is a process of in-depth communication that allows parties to get to know each other better and to find commonalities with the other side.
Allow parties to agree and disagree.
Search for goal that all parties can agree to.
Focus on the behavior, situation or problem area without attacking the person involved.
Do not assume your values or beliefs are “right.” They reflect a view of the world from your unique perspective.
Respecting another’s viewpoint as equally valuable opens an opportunity for learning and growth.
Structural conflicts caused by:
Structural conflicts are caused by forces external to the people in dispute.
Limited physical resources or authority, Unequal power and authority geographic constraints (distance or proximity), time constraints (too little or too much), organizational changes,
These and others can make structural conflict seem like a crisis.
Ways to address structural conflicts:
Parties' appreciation that a conflict has an external source can have the effect of them coming to jointly address the imposed difficulties.
Clearly define roles. Reallocate ownership or control of resources. Establish fair and mutually acceptable decision-making process. Change negotiations from positional to interest-based bargaining. Modify means of parties (less coercion, more persuasion). Change physical and environmental relations.
Interest conflicts caused by:
Interest conflicts are caused by competition over perceived incompatible needs.
Conflicts of interest result when one or more of the parties believe that in order to satisfy his or her needs, the needs and interests of an opponent must be sacrificed.
Interest-based conflict will commonly be expressed in positional terms.
Interest conflicts caused by:
Interest-based conflicts may occur over substantive issues (such as money, physical resources, time, etc.);
procedural issues (the way the dispute is to be resolved); and
psychological issues (perceptions of trust, fairness, desire for participation, respect, etc.).
Resolving Interest conflicts:
Focus on interests, not positions.
Look for objective criteria.
Look for solutions that meet needs of all parties.
Search for ways to expand options/resources.
Develop trade-offs to satisfy interests of different strengths.
Causes of conflict:
Data Interest Conflicts Conflicts Relationship Structural Conflicts Value Conflicts Conflicts
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN CONFLICT IS BADLY MANAGED or IGNORED?????????????????
WHEN CONFLICT IS BADLY MANAGED or IGNORED, the following often occurs...
anxiety withdrawal Procrastination helplessness Confusion Denial separation escalation polarization loneliness
anger loss of productivity resentment high blood pressure stress tiredness Illness broken crockery
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN CONFLICT IS MANAGED SKILLFULLY……..
WHEN CONFLICT IS MANAGED SKILLFULLY, the results are different. a sense of achievement a sense of smooth running
comfort Fun vitality happiness openness Efficiency feeling of power relief comradeship
a sense of expansion Teamwork change Growth expanded relationships Peace relaxation good health restful sleep
Class Activity: Name Types of Conflict We Face…………….
A road map to identifying five types of conflict: Information Conflicts
Perceived Conflicts
Data Interest Conflicts Conflicts Relationship Structural Conflicts Value Conflicts Conflicts
Structural Conflicts
External Conflicts
Types of conflict
By evaluating these five categories of conflict – we can begin to determine the causes of a conflict and design resolution strategies that will have a higher probability of success.
Data Conflicts Relation ship Conflict s
Interest Conflicts
Value Conflicts
Structural Conflicts
Data aka Information conflicts caused by:
Data conflicts occur when people;
Lack information necessary to make wise decisions,
Misinformation,
Disagreements on the relevancy of information,
Different Interpretation of information
Some data conflicts may be unnecessary since they are caused by poor communication between the people in conflict.
While others may be genuine incompatibilities associated with data collection, interpretation or communication. (WTO,UNO…)
Receiver Responsibilities
A plumber wrote to the National Bureau of Standards to tell them hydrochloric acid is good for cleaning out clogged drains.
A technical specialist wrote back: the efficacy of hydrochloric acid is indisputable, but the corrosive residue is incompatible with metallic permanence.
We cannot assume responsibility for the production of toxic and noxious residue with hydrochloric acid, and suggest you use an alternative procedure.
Finally, Manager wrote: Don’t use hydrochloric acid. It eats the hell out of pipes.
A Shared Semantic Code
My My World of World of Experiences Words
My Semantic Code
Your Your World of World of Words Experiences
Your Semantic Code
Exercise 2: FUZZY MEANINGS
OBJECTIVE: to illustrate the wide range of meanings which are often attached to common words and phrases in our language.
PROCEDURE: Look at the list of commonly used words and phrases like the following that characterize different degrees or frequencies of events and tell us what they mean to you…………..
FUZZY MEANINGS Often Always
100%
Sometimes Never Usually Most of the time Occasionally Seldom A lot Almost Rarely Frequently Quite often
please specify a number from 0 to 100 that, best indicates the amount (percentage) of time that each word conveys.
FUZZY MEANINGS Often
On regular basis
Always
Ceaselessly
Sometimes
Once in a while
Never
Not at all
Usually
More often than not
Most of the time
More often than not
Occasionally
Seldom
Seldom
Hardly ever
A lot
Plenty
Almost Always
Nearly every time
Rarely
Once in a blue moon
Frequently
Regularly
Quite often
Fairly regularly
Ways to address data conflicts:
Most data conflicts will have "data solutions."
Reach agreement on what information is important. and relevant
Agree on information collection process (primary & secondary research)
Develop common criteria to assess information. (how two parties to a contract interpret information)
Use third-party experts to get outside opinion or break deadlock.
Relationship conflicts caused by:
Relationship conflicts occur because of the presence of
Misperceptions or stereotypes, All Motorcyclists are Hells Angels. All Muslims are terrorists. All Lawyers are crooks.
Poor communication or miscommunication,
Repetitive negative behaviors I don't care I don't give a damn I don't want to hear.
Strong negative emotions, •
Don’t judge emotions.
•
No one’s feelings are more or less “right” than the other’s.
•
Emotions reflect a valid perspective of an individual. Even if you don’t understand it, acknowledge the other person’s reaction as important.
•
Relationship problems often fuel disputes and lead to an unnecessary escalating spiral of destructive conflict.
Ways to address relationship conflicts:
Supporting the safe and balanced expression of perspectives and emotions for acknowledgment is one effective approach to managing relational conflict.
Ways to address relationship conflicts:
Control negative expressions
Promote process that legitimizes feelings.
Clarify perceptions - build positive perceptions.
Improve quality and quantity of communication.
Block negative behavior by changing structure. (Exercise)
Encourage positive problem-solving attitudes.
Exercise: Changing Negative to Positive 1.
“I have a problem at work.”
2.
“You never take me anywhere. We always stay home and watch TV.”
3.
“You should have worked on that management report instead of filing papers.”
4.
“You were really bad for missing work when we had a deadline to meet.”
5.
“One of his faults that drives me crazy, is that his desk is always a mess.”
6.
“You made a mistake.”
PROBLEMS become SITUATIONS
A negative statement “I have a problem at work.”
Contrast this with the more positive, “I have a difficult situation at work.”
A problem seems as though it is stuck to you and will always be there.
A situation, on the other hand, seems temporary and solvable.
ALWAYS and NEVER become OFTEN and SELDOM
A negative statement, “You never take me anywhere. We always stay home and watch TV.”
Contrast this with the more positive, “ Since we seldom go out in the evenings, and we're often so tired we just watch TV, I get frustrated. I would love to have a special evening out with you. Can we plan one together?”
Always and never are negative words because they are rarely true and exaggerate a situation. Since they are usually used to criticize, people feel attacked and become defensive.
In the second statement, however, you are explaining your own feelings and desires, so there is no need for your partner to get defensive, and you are more likely to get your wish – an enjoyable evening out.
SHOULD HAVE becomes COULD A negative statement, “You should have worked on that HAVE management report instead of filing papers.”
Contrast this with the more positive, “You could have worked on that management report instead of filing papers.”
Using the words, should have, creates guilt and shame for something that has already been done and cannot be changed,
whereas the words, could have, don't condemn anyone. They let someone know he or she had a choice, and this experience then becomes a lesson for making better choices in the future.
BAD becomes UNWISE
A negative statement, “You were really bad for missing work when we had a deadline to meet.”
Contrast this with the more positive “Missing work when we had a deadline to meet was not a wise decision. The rest of us had to work overtime. Would you please find a way to make it up to us.”
Using the word, bad, is a judgment of a person's character, and causes resentment. On the other hand, using the word,
unwise, refers to the natural consequences of the person's actions, and doesn't judge a person's basic character.
FAULTS become DIFFERENCES
A negative statement, “One of his faults that drives me crazy, is that his desk is always a mess.”
Contrast this with the more positive, “One of the differences between us is that he keeps his desk messy, while I get frustrated unless everything is put in its place.”
In using the word, faults, you are judging someone's actions as right or wrong.
Using the word, differences, removes the critical tone, because you are pointing out how you are different, not that one person is right or wrong.
MISTAKES become VALUABLE LESSONS
A negative statement, “You made a mistake.”
Contrast this with the more positive, “There is a valuable lesson in what you did.”
The first way makes others feel ashamed of what they did, and will probably inhibit them from trying new things in the future.
The second way gives others something positive to do – to learn from their actions, thereby encouraging learning and experimentation.
The bottom line is that words can either be destructive or enriching to your relationships with other people.
So, before you allow the words to simply flow out of your mouth without considering what they mean, remember this one very important word -
THINK.
Value conflicts caused by:
Value conflicts are caused by perceived or actual incompatible belief systems.
Values are beliefs that people use to give meaning to their lives. Values explain what is "good" or "bad," "right" or "wrong," "just" or "unjust."
Differing values need not cause conflict.
Beliefs are not true. They are constructs around which we organize our behaviors. So we each behave as though our beliefs were true. (Conservatives vs. liberals)
What are attitudes? "A settled opinion, or way of thinking"
Attitudes - we can only infer them from a person’s behavior
They are attributes of personality
Values are deeply held beliefs about what is good, right, and appropriate.
Values are deep-seated and remain constant over time.
We accumulate our values from childhood based on teachings and observations of our parents, teachers, religious leaders, and other influential and powerful people.
Example: Maria felt stressed out and didn't know what to do when her boss implied she should lie to a client; honesty is one of Maria’s most deeply held values.
Value conflicts caused by:
People can live together in harmony with different value systems.
Value disputes arise only when;
people attempt to force one set of values on others or (TALIBAN, the WEST, etc.)
lay claim to exclusive value systems that do not allow for divergent beliefs.
Ways to address value conflicts:
Reframing Third parties can sometime help the disputants to redefine or reframe their conflict, focusing more on attainable interests and less on nonnegotiable positions. Dialogue Dialogue is a process of in-depth communication that allows parties to get to know each other better and to find commonalities with the other side.
Allow parties to agree and disagree.
Search for goal that all parties can agree to.
Focus on the behavior, situation or problem area without attacking the person involved.
Do not assume your values or beliefs are “right.” They reflect a view of the world from your unique perspective.
Respecting another’s viewpoint as equally valuable opens an opportunity for learning and growth.
Structural conflicts caused by:
Structural conflicts are caused by forces external to the people in dispute.
Limited physical resources or authority, Unequal power and authority geographic constraints (distance or proximity), time constraints (too little or too much), organizational changes,
These and others can make structural conflict seem like a crisis.
Ways to address structural conflicts:
Parties' appreciation that a conflict has an external source can have the effect of them coming to jointly address the imposed difficulties.
Clearly define roles. Reallocate ownership or control of resources. Establish fair and mutually acceptable decision-making process. Change negotiations from positional to interest-based bargaining. Modify means of parties (less coercion, more persuasion). Change physical and environmental relations.
Interest conflicts caused by:
Interest conflicts are caused by competition over perceived incompatible needs.
Conflicts of interest result when one or more of the parties believe that in order to satisfy his or her needs, the needs and interests of an opponent must be sacrificed.
Interest-based conflict will commonly be expressed in positional terms.
Interest conflicts caused by:
Interest-based conflicts may occur over substantive issues (such as money, physical resources, time, etc.);
procedural issues (the way the dispute is to be resolved); and
psychological issues (perceptions of trust, fairness, desire for participation, respect, etc.).
Resolving Interest conflicts:
Focus on interests, not positions.
Look for objective criteria.
Look for solutions that meet needs of all parties.
Search for ways to expand options/resources.
Develop trade-offs to satisfy interests of different strengths.
Causes of conflict:
Data Interest Conflicts Conflicts Relationship Structural Conflicts Value Conflicts Conflicts
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