The Scene Magazine

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appy our

Schedule

Rockin’ Out with

A200 Ft Myers

Derby Girls

Claudie Auclair

and 5 Hot Swimsuit Models

You’ve Been

SCENE Issue 1

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THE

Cover Model: Crystal Hemphill

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SCENE

www.TheSceneOnline.com

Letter from the Publisher Welcome to The SCENE Magazine! I am excited to bring to you the premier issue of SWFL’s hottest entertainment magazine. We will be your source of local events that are going on in Lee & Collier Counties, pictures of the hottest local people having fun supporting our bars, clubs and restaurants and bring you editorial that will pique your curiosity. This issue features some very fun editorial content that I hope you will enjoy and many more exciting stories to come. I was granted back stage access to one of SWFL’s hottest rising local bands A200, whom I admit I have a crush on. I also interviewed the Ft Myers Roller Derby girls who are the ultimate tough girls in a very physical sport who know how to have fun. Mark your calendars for our launch party on October 17th starting at 10 p.m. Venu Nightclub in downtown Fort Myers is our host for the event. We plan to throw a party this town will be buzzing about for some time. See our ad on page 42. I hope to see you there! I would also like to thank my friends and family for supporting me through this entire process. I have such wonderful people in my life cheering me on and encouraging me to go after my dreams. I appreciate you picking up our first issue and hope you enjoy the magazine!

Publisher Do you like what we have done? Did we offend you in any way? Do you have any ideas for editorial that you would like to see in the upcoming issues? We would love to hear from you! Email us at [email protected]. 2577 First Street Ft Myers FL 33901 Phone: 239-222-7015 Fax: 239-244-8938 For advertising info: [email protected] www.TheSceneOnline.com 2009 The SCENE Magazine is published quarterly. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part of any content is strictly prohibited. The SCENE Magazine LLC, its officers, staff member or writers do not warrant the accuracy of or resume responsibility for any of the material contained herein. Assumes no financial responsibility for errors in ads beyond the cost of the space occupied by error. Freelance photographers are responsible for their copyrights. All photo material, letters and text submitted automatically become property of The SCENE Magazine, LLC.

Publisher Lisa Bornhorst Art Director Nikole Martz Photographer Fred Love Writers Lisa Bornhorst Tod Dahlke Rolend Demers Marshall Sheido Contributing Doug Vosler Photographers Greg Richards Matt Bornhorst Amber Johnston Graphic Artists Nikole Martz Cathi Bifano Advertising Sales Lisa Bornhorst

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Song I Gotta Feeling

Black Eyed Peas

Party in the USA Down Whatcha Say Run This Town

Jay Sean Jason DeRulo Jay-Z

Use Somebody

Kings of Leon

Good Girls Go Bad Hotel Room Service She Wolf You Belong With Me Take a Bow Young Forever Obsessed Boom Boom Pow One Time Paparazzi Say Hey (I Love You) Empire State of Mind

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Artist

Miley Cyrus

Cobra starship

Album The E.N.D. Party in the USA Down Whatcha Say Run This Town Only By The Night Hot Mess

Shakira

Hotel Room Service She Wolf

Taylor Swift

Fearless

Glee Cast Jay-Z ft. Mr. Hudson Mariah Carey Black Eyed Peas Justin Bieber Lady Gaga Michael Franti & Spearhead

Take a Bow

Pitbull

Jay-Z

21 Guns

Green Day

Love Drunk

Boys Like Girls

The Blueprint 3 Obsessed The E.N.D. One Time The Fame All Rebel Rockers The Blueprint 3 21st Century Breakdown Love Drunk

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Think you’ve got what it takes to grace the pages of The SCENE? Send an email to [email protected] with “Casting Call” in the subject line to receive information on our next casting call! www.TheSceneOnline.com

[email protected] 239-222-7015

Mention this ad for 10% off your advertising DOWNTOWN FORT MYERS 1502 Hendry Street, at the corner of First St. & Hendry St. 239.337.4662

GULF COAST TOWN CENTER 10045 Gulf Center Dr., Bldg. E, Suite 115 next to Outback Steakhouse 239.267.6020

www.WorldFamousCigarBar.com Large Walk-In Humidor at both locations

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Signature Cocktails, Martini’s and Premium Beers on Tap Happy Hour Weekdays 11 AM - 7 PM Live Music at Gulf Coast Town Center Location, Every Wed. 10pm -Close Martini Monday’s at Downtown Location, 5 - 9 PM and 12 Midnight to Close Featuring Select Svedka Martini’s for $5.00! Hospitality Night at GCTC every Sunday 1/2 price drinks if you are “In the Biz” (bring your paystub) and live music from 10pm - close

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I have a crush on

A200!

With Keith Clanton’s sexy lead vocals and the way he strums the acoustic guitar, Vic Jimenez’s intricate bass lines, the multi-talented Bob Tabarrini on acoustic or electric guitar, John Housley’s amazing jam out sessions and drummer Ed Ziehm’s mind-blowing rhythms, how could I not? And you should have a crush on them, too!

I recently had the amazing opportunity to hang out with the band while they were setting up for their Thursday night gig at The Sandy Parrot and ask some questions that many people would like to know about A200. Each of the band members bring something unique to the group that has resulted in them being obviously one of SWFL’s hottest bands on the rise. If you have never had the pleasure to see them live, then you need to get off your ass and go see one of their shows! They rock the house at any venue they play with amazing crowd participation singing along to the tunes and dancing their asses off. They take great pride in their professionalism and have worked extremely hard to get where they are and its paying off for these guys. 10

Written By Lisa Bornhorst

A200

Q- How did all band members meet and become A200? A- We were all in different bands in the area for many years and took the best of members of those bands and formed one killer band now known as A200. Q-How do you get around to the gigs? A-We all meet at one location and travel around in a big white bus with a trailer that’s outfitted with bunks and a fridge. We mash ourselves in and have a party on wheels! Q-Are you living the rock star dream? A-I don’t think there is a rock star dream for what we do. It’s a lot of hard work to pull off what we do and people don’t realize that for us its 12-18 hour days. After we are on stage we have to break down the set and load up all the gear. We don’t just show up at the bar, go on stage, then leave and party. We aren’t quite at that level, but we are on our way! Q-Where do you see the band in 5 years? A-Looking to do management of other bands, continue recording and playing at bigger venues. We would like to do more writing of original tracks and selling

albums versus playing in bars day in and day out. Don’t get me wrong, playing in bars has helped us grow our name, but it can be very taxing being around bars and drunk people every night. Q-Do you have a record deal in the works? A-We are privately signed and manage ourselves through an independent label, we don’t have any corporate big whigs telling us what to do. Q-Have you ever made out with a groupie? A-Every single one of them… except for the guys!! Q-Do you have a ritual before you go on stage? A-No particular ritual before we go on stage, but we do try to joke around and try and be positive before going on stage and pump each other up to set the tone for the night. Q-How did you come up with the name A200? A- Bob actually had an idea, we were looking for something a little funny and off the hook, so we came across the medicine called A200 which is actually a medicine that is used to kill pubic lice/crabs. We have a little crab as our mascot, kinda silly I know!

Q-What is the craziest thing a groupie has done? A-Let’s just say each band member gave me their craziest story then afterwards they each asked me to not retell the story. Might not be a good public relations idea, sorry folks! Q-What is your favorite venue to play at? A-The Buddha all the way!! Q-What do you love most about what you do? A-Writing and recording our own original stuff. We work really hard at what we do and to get to do this with such a great group of guys is a dream. How awesome is that we get to do what we love! If you would like to listen to full versions of their original songs visit www.A200.biz. You can download from iTunes on their website and you can purchase CD’s at any of their live shows. September 18th they released their new CD “Stray From Here” with a launch party at The Buddha in Ft Myers. Check them out on their website for dates of their upcoming shows and tell them The SCENE sent ya!!

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Tampa Clearwater St Petersburg Alice Cooper Ruth Eckerd Hall Fri, 10/02/09 8:00 PM The Killers USF Sun Dome Fri, 10/02/09 8:00 PM Metallica St Pete Times Forum Sat, 10/03/09 7:00 PM U2 360º Tour Raymond James Stadium Fri, 10/09/09 7:00 PM Australian Pink Floyd Ruth Eckerd Hall Fri, 10/09/09 8:00 PM Brad Paisley W/ Dierks Bentley and Jimmy Wayne Ford Amphitheatre At the Florida State Fairgrounds Fri, 10/16/09 7:30 PM Willie Nelson Ruth Eckerd Hall Tue, 10/20/09 8:00 PM

Reo Speedwagon & Styx Alice Cooper Ford Amphitheatre Pompano Beach At the Florida State Amphitheatre Fairgrounds Sat, 10/03/09 Fri, 10/30/09 8:00 PM 7:00 PM The Black Crowes Joshua Radin Pompano Beach State Theatre Amphitheatre Tue, 11/10/09 Tue, 10/06/09 6:00 PM 8:00 PM Steve Miller Band Ruth Eckerd Hall Wed, 11/18/09 8:00 PM Miley Cyrus St Pete Times Forum Tue, 12/01/09 7:00 PM

Ft Myers

All You Need Is Love Beatles Musical Germain Arena Fri, 10/02/09 & 10/3 8:00 PM Lynyrd Skynyrd Germain Arena Thu, 10/22/09 8:00 PM

West Palm Beach Ft Lauderdale Miami Alan Jackson Hard Rock Live Thu, 10/01/09 7:30 PM

Beastie Boys Bayfront Park Amphitheater Thu, 10/08/09 8:00 PM Brad Paisley W/ Dierks Bentley and Jimmy Wayne Cruzan Amphitheatre Sat, 10/17/09 7:30 PM

Steve Miller Band Hard Rock Live Tue, 11/17/09 8:00 PM Miley Cyrus American Airlines Arena Wed, 12/02/09 7:00 PM

Orlando

The Australian Pink Floyd Show Hard Rock Live Orlando Sun, 10/11/09 8:00 PM Colbie Caillat House of Blues Orlando Tue, 10/20/09 6:00 PM Shinedown House of Blues Orlando Wed, 10/21/09 6:45 PM

Marc Anthony American Airlines Arena Sat, 10/24/09 Willie Nelson 8:00 PM King Center for the Performing Arts REO Speedwagon Wed, 10/21/09 and Styx 8:00 PM Cruzan Amphitheatre Sat, 10/31/09 Joshua Radin 7:00 PM The Social Orlando Fri, 11/13/09 Joshua Radin 8:00 PM Culture Room Wed, 11/11/09 AC/DC 7:30 PM Amway Arena Thu, 11/19/09 8:00 PM

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QUARTER F**KING BEER NITE

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1528 Hendry St Fort Myers 239-980-7630 myspace.com/neolounge Book your holiday party today at Neo Lounge!

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The Edison

Ultra

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239-645-9296

Greg Richards

Amber Johnston

[email protected]

Reality TV Stars Photography

Blue Martini

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Fred Love Photography 19

Fred Love Photography 20

Fred Love Photography 21

Fred Love Photography 22

Fred Love Photography 23

Fred Love Photography 24

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DJ REVIEW By Roland Demers D.J. R-ONE

As a seasoned D.J. from Miami, I can speak of my experience without adding color and to stay non-biased. My musical knowledge and data base span over 3 decades of music memory. I will come at ya with 80’s retro, funk, hip-hop, top 40’s, rock, house and yes, even Latin music as I am a cross-bred D.J. My local spots have included Envie, Venu, Blu Sushi, Cigar Bar, Dwyers, Vapianos and The Reserve Cigar & Wine Bar.

musical recipes that include melodic ingredients such as hip-hop, R&B, house, and reggae along with other throw back genres at Venu, Ultra, and Noodles.

D.J. Big John

Who can figure out what’s going on in John’s head. If songs were bullets you’d get shot at from all angles as they spun off his turntables! He is by far one of the greatest D.J.s ever. John’s name has become synonymous with the local dining pleasure palace known as Blu Sushi. As sushi chefs sharpen their D.J. 007 knives, John prepares to “The Chocolate serve dessert by way of Boy Wonder” nostalgic 80’s, top 40’s, He single handedly masters hip-hop and R&B, mashups the art of mixing and and house music. Always scratching and can be heard an experience when he’s at local clubs in Naples and spinning. Fort Myers. You can witness his gift of serving true

D.J. Quest “Big Haiti”

Whether its his NYC flava or his southern stylistic influences that your auditory canals long for. This Haitian Sensation, who has graced the club dogs with his musical presence and charisma, can be heard at Bar Louie, Level, Eddie Fish Bowls and throughout the air waves on the one and only 105.5 The Beat.

an awesome up and comer D.J. Spiff.

D.J. Showtime

Yes! Even Italians have their hands on the turntables when not stuffing cannolis in their mouth! This giggling guinea has got to be at the top of the D.J. totem pole here in Southwest Florida as he is responsible for many a musically induced drunken nights with girls hanging on strip poles at Eddies. D.J. Griff Gotti He is a true master of the The “go against the grain” turntables and is always D.J. of Fort Myers and offering up new and exciting Naples, this man is not a mixes for the club dogs. myth! He is very real and quite the artistic blender of This music master can be music. Without D.J.s such as heard at Pearl and Level as Griff Gotti we would be stuck well as other local watering holes. on pause. So, if you want to experience unique vibes, check him out at Level, Privilege, Ultra or Pearl for slamming rhythms. He is usually in the company of

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COLLABORATES WITH LOUIS VUITTON

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e has had a passion for fashion ever since, as a child, he picked out his outfits for kindergarten. He has honed his style on stage as a performer and in the front row at fashion week. Now, the multi award-winning producer and recording artist Kanye West has teamed up with his favorite label to create a collection of sneakers. With this, one of his first forays into design, Kanye West has not only fulfilled a long-standing personal ambition, but has also brought his own considerable experience to the project. “I think because I’ve worn so many shoes, and had to be on stage and have shoes that were comfortable,and put them with so many outfits, that I’ve become an expert with gym shoes,” he says. “I didn’t want to do a sneaker that just had my name on it. I wanted to put in the proper amount of time and work to come up with something that was inventive.” The result is a daring and innovative collection that fuses Kanye West’s edgy urban aesthetic with Louis Vuitton’s know-how and craftsmanship. 28

“It’s overwhelming. I feel like I’m inside of a dream. Even with all the music awards that I’ve won, to be able to do something so official with the number one fashion house in the world - you know, no Grammy can buy you that.” - Kanye West The three styles − executed in suede, calfskin or a patchwork of leathers, and in mostly neutral colours − run the gamut from hi-top to low-top, and are all designed, in Kanye West’s words, to unite “form and function, and look good with a pair of jeans”. All share strong signature details, in particular a high padded heel flap into which the wearer can tuck the back of his jeans, inspired by a space-age jacket in the cult David Lynch movie Dune, and a Monogram flower-embossed outsole

“I didn’t want to do a sneaker that just had my name on it...” which, though sturdy, feels surprisingly light and flexible. Don’s, named after Kanye West’s righthand man, is the rapper’s take on the classic laceup sneaker. In addition to the padded heel flap, it features a tongue specifically constructed to stand straight up,

creating a hip urban look. Previewed in eyepopping red calfskin at Louis Vuitton’s Autumn/ Winter 2009-2010 fashion show in January, it caused a sensation on the runway, and proved − as Kanye West intended − that it looked as good with formal wear as with dressed-down jeans. Jaspers is Kanye West’s signature hi-top sneaker, which comes with laces and padded Velcro straps in black suede or off-white calfskin with suede and patent leather trim. In addition, a flamboyant leather patchwork version sports suede tassels with gold-finish accessories and a fluorescent pink outsole inspired by Japanese pop art. The same tassels and fluorescent outsole also feature on the leather patchwork version of the third style, Mr Hudson, which gives the iconic boat shoe an edgy street-style update. Named after an artist who features on Kanye West’s latest album, 808s & Heartbreak, Mr Hudson is also available in bright white calfskin with patent trim. Pietro Beccari, Louis Vuitton Senior VicePresident, Communication and Marketing, is a personal friend of Kanye West. He says: “Louis Vuitton has always been in tune with its times, manifesting its modernity through collaborations with the greatest talents of each generation. Our design partnership with Kanye West is a new instance of this, which keeps Louis Vuitton at the cutting edge of style and creativity.” Yves Carcelle, CEO of Louis Vuitton, comments: “We are delighted that Kanye West accepted our invitation to extend his considerable creative talents from music to design. He has always been a good friend of Louis Vuitton, with a keen sense of personal style, and this impressive debut fulfils an ambition he has held for some time.” The Kanye West collection will be available in Louis Vuitton stores at the end of 2009.

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I s s i h H T ow Bornh

e t t i r n

L y b isa

orst W

to myself (the evil and good side) so 333 fit perfectly cause I’m half evil.

from the 70’s until now? That it is all staged or fake… that’s not true!

What would you say to someone thinking about becoming a Derby Girl? If you are ready to get hit, hit back, fall down, get up, work and play hard – it’s for you.

How did you get involved with the league? I was doing research on underground marketing for my job and derby kept popping up. As soon as I saw it I knew that I was a perfect fit. All the rest is history!

Anya Dixon –

Jersey Devil-

Teacher How did you come up with your alter ego? I wanted something that represented who I am. I grew up surrounded by tales of the jersey devil. He supposedly lives near my home where route 666 originates. I have always thought that I had two sides 30

Senior Account Executive for a local direct marketing firm Do you have battle scars? Lots of little scars from “rink rash”. I cross my fingers every time I step on that track. The injuries are real and pain is not fun!

Give me 5 words that describe the Derby Girls. Strong, confident, unique, athletic and sexy!

Velvet Revolver –

Marketing Manager What are some preconceived notions about the roller derby

Te Kill Ya Sunshyne –

Medical Office Receptionist How did you come up with your alter ego? Tequila is my husbands drink of choice.

Do you ever apologize for hitting someone? Probably by accident or if I know it was illegal.

The Alexoricist –

Super kick-ass awesome radio personality on 99X Are there any movies/music that inspire your performance

For more info check out ww

Derby Gi s

Myer ort

on the track? The Donna’s “Get Rid of That Girl”. I’m not a big fan of The Donna’s, but that song is freaking awesome and perfect for us. Our mantra is in it… “kill, kill, kill”

Q&A s l r

at the soup kitchen, doing a food drive and promoting self acceptance to young girls in local schools. We have

How did you come up with your alter ego? I asked my listeners to brainstorm with me. There were a bunch of cool ones. My co-worker, Dumb Chris, who was my traffic reporter back then, came up with The Alexorcist. I liked that one the best. I figured I could go with the whole barfing green and head-spinning theme. Im evil!

French Made - Asst. Branch Manager-Banking Officer What has been your greatest accomplishment? I would say setting record attendance at our bouts (over 500 spectators) and what we are doing to give back to the community, such as working

ww.FortMyersDerbyGirls.com

th The F Wi

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l o R l e W you are, we are!

What are the teams’ goals? I know as the new PR person, that we want to be a well known name within our community and be a force to be reckoned with all over the country.

Klymaxxx –

Co-owner of Effective Marketing & Creative Is there a team that makes you nervous? I am nervous before every bout, but once I get into the energy of the competition, it doesn’t really matter who I am playing against.

fantastic sponsors and I think the community is realizing that this is great way to promote their company and help FMDG relay the message that you don’t have to be a size 5 to be a strong, positive member in this world. Be proud of who

Are there any movies/music that inspires your performance on the track? Any high energy music like Rage Against the Machine, The Prodigy, etc. Music with attitude gets me pumped up. Visit their website for upcoming events and appearances. 31

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Why Johnsons Are Better Written By Marshall Sheido

Never in my 34 years has my Johnson made me completely miserable once a month. I also have never felt the need to curl up with my favorite type of bon bon and a dvd of “The Notebook” and cry myself to sleep because my Johnson was making me emotional unstable.

girls a little bit, I imagine a little variety might be nice but at the end of the day there is no substitute for the REAL thing. I will also testify to the “easy of use factor” of my party in the pants.

Never on a good nights drinking and carousing have I found it difficult to find a My Johnson, for all intensive purpose has two place to use the bathroom. A tree, a bush, and functions, one to relieve me of my beer and if so brazen, a stop sign do well as places two to make me and my significant other quite to get relief. Not so for our beautiful counter happy. Some would say the Johnson could parts who have to run from crowded bar to be replaced by alternative methods . I say us crowded bar praying that the line isn’t fifteen guys have something going for us because girls deep. Girls may be able to bat there eyes the bars still seem to be full of girls that enjoy and smile coyly and get what they want from more than what can provided by the energizer us guys but when it comes to the women’s bunny. If you catch my drift. I’m with you restroom no amount of sex appeal is going 34

to get you to the front of THAT line. What’s a girl to do but find a place to squat. Guys usually have their pack of drunk buddies laughing behind them as they water a bush. I have never seen a pack of ladies cheering on a girl who had the misfortune of not finding a restroom and had to let loose in public. Kind of a party killer if you ask me. I have also had the misfortune of walking into the men’s bathroom only to find a lady sitting in a urinal before she’s about to burst. At that point, I thanked my lucky stars for my Johnson. Sitting in a urinal looks VERY uncomfortable especially when a perspective Johnson comes walking in.

We don’t have weak spots. Gee, I’m sorry that you got kicked in the balls. And you zipped your penis in your jeans? I’ve heard that that really hurts. Unfortunately, I can’t really commiserate because I don’t have a particularly sensitive body part dangling off of my person. No, breasts are not an equivalent.

If all this weren’t enough to prove the supremacy of the male persuasion. There is the matter of “entry” and “exit”. At no time do I feel the need to have anything larger than my stream leave my body. After witnessing child birth I am forever a advocate of the Johnson and if you ladies were asked whilst in the act of birth, I believe, (after you ripped my head off for asking a question and not providing a well timed ice chip for the lips) you would agree.

We’re sexy, and sex sells. All we have to do is show a little cleavage, stick our butts out, and bat our eyes. Bingo! We move up to the front of the line, get bigger discounts, and get freebies. It might be manipulative and morally suspicious, but that hasn’t stopped us.

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Why Boobs Are Better Written By Lisa Bornhorst

Unless I have to pee in the woods, I never regret the day I was born a girl. These days, being a female is pretty damn wonderful. We can exploit our own stereotypes. Don’t want to build that IKEA desk or fix the leaky faucet? That’s cool, cause as girls, we can just claim that we’re incompetent and make a guy do it. Rosie the Riveter and her compatriots might get pissy about this method of action, but I’m not undermining girl power. Fixing things sucks. Why not outsource?

We’ve got what you want. Guys will always end up falling all over themselves to keep us happy, cause they’re lost without the poon. When it comes down to it, your right hand just doesn’t hold up in the face of a real-live girl. God knows you guys try, though.

We can cover up our imperfections. Thanks to makeup, hair dye, and all sorts of cosmetic procedures, we can cover up the blemishes and the grey hair. I don’t care if they make man makeup…that is never acceptable. And Rogaine is just kind of sad. We can exceed expectations. Every time a girl says something intelligent or witty, people generally seem to be a lot more surprised and appreciative of our opinions and knowledge. It can be a pain in the ass, but I kind of enjoy being awesome and getting way more credit than usual for it. The mother of them all…multiple orgasms. There is seriously no way that a guy could claim he would prefer one messy, sticky orgasm to what we’ve got: as many as we want, with no recovery time and no need for stain remover. In fact, it is somewhat of a letdown when we’re ready to go for round two and you need a break.

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**Call before for confirmation of happy hour specials. The SCENE is not responsible for any incorrect information.**

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Come get screwed!

THE SCENE’s

Premiere launch party October 17th @10 pm No cover before 11:30 $2 Sexy Drinks all night long $3 Beers $3 SCENE Shot specials $100 bottles with early reservation $5 Premium Vodka Drinks

CLUB REVIEW By Roland Demers

HIP-HOP The Flavor of Hip Hop, or as D.J Griff Gotti has dubbed his serving “Sunday Soup”, can be consumed beat by beat in MASSIVE Portions as D.J.s 007, Showtime, KS-1, Quest and yours truly to name a few, throw the beats to the “Club Dogs” and bitches on dance floors every night of the week. The Ft.Myers & Naples club scene is truly fortunate to have such a world class choice of DJs in this humble part of America. These technical artisans help take away the daily stresses if but just for a moment. Thank you gentlemen. LIVE MUSIC Wanna smoke a “stogie” while ingesting some local live entertainment, then stop by the Reserve Cigar & Wine Bar and enjoy one or both on any given night as they offer a great backdrop for an enjoyable evening. How can I speak of live entertainment without mentioning the Buddha Bar a local watering hole known hands down as the place to be for live rock concerts. For a more laid back scene and a glimpse at a lush tropical golf course , take a short scenic ride down McGregor to The Edison on a Wednesday night where they are known for their famous ladies night. HOUSE MUSIC After 30 years of life in Miami the last thing I thought I’d find in Fort Myers and Naples was a house scene. Well Big John, T-Mac, Chris Dez, Craig Mac and an army of House DJs, all of which have my mind constantly absorbing new and epic mixes, have shown me just how wrong I was. House music can be heard at places like Blu Sushi, Privelege and a new to the scene heavy hitter, Blue Martini.

www.VenuFtMyers.com 239-770-8368 2278 First St Fort Myers 42

LATIN MUSIC Being that I am a self proclaimed, “CRICK” meaning half cracker half spic. D.J. Cristian is a proven musical servant of salsa, merengue, bachata, vallenato and reggaetton, to name a few. Latin genres can be heard at Neo Lounge, Ultra Night Club and Venu. Let’s not forget DJs Gero, Ezzy, and DJ Eric who also offer up a quality blend of latin mixes at local clubs such as SALSA Nightclub and Pearl Lounge.

Discount Limo Service Finally you can impress your friends and arrive in style without going broke. Limo service now available for $30/ hour for any event, at any time, to anywhere. • Sporting Events • Restaurants • Clubs • Golf Courses • Malls • Doctor’s Appointments • Airports • Out of Town Trips You call us at 239-244-7399 and we’ll take you there! If you’ve had too much to drink, we’ll take you home. Cocktails, champagne, and soft drinks available upon request. Driver’s tip not included. Suggested $10-$20/hour. Reserve ahead or call us when you need us.

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T

he scene is set. You’re in a bar with your friends, and everyone’s having a few drinks. A few drinks lead to a few more drinks, and the next thing you know your drunk. You’re chatting happily and laughing at just about everything. You make a quick run to the bathroom, check your hair in the mirror and head back to the party. Yet, something catches your eye... buried deep within the confines of your pocketbook or jacket pocket. It’s your cellphone. Ah, yes the cell-phone. A drunk person’s best friend ... or worst enemy? We’ve all been there at one point or another—you wake up the next morning to a cell-phone that looks the same but holds within its outbox /inbox a world of revealed secrets, gossip and general disorder. Here are texts that were sent to us anonymously from local drunks that we just had to share: • Haha! she couldn’t find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame?? • I assumed I was wet when I woke up because the tent leaked during the downpour, but then I later realized that she pissed on me, the air mattress and the sleeping bag at some point after we passed out • You know whats crazy. I’m at a table in a cafe having breakfast with my family. I spewed half an hour ago, and I have no idea where my underwear are! • My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my d*@k was a lightsaber...I’m buying the engagement ring tomorrow! • What a fantastic night, I drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from the top of a fence • I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words “dibs on the chunky one” came out of your mouth. Did you send or receive a text from last night you want to share anonymously? Email us at [email protected] EXPIRES 11/15/09

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DRINKING GAMES Circle of Death You need: A deck of cards and 4+ people Spread a deck of cards out into a circular shape. One persons chooses a card and the person to their left chooses a card. If the cards are of the same suit, you add up the values of the two cards and the two people drink for that many seconds. If they aren’t the same suit, then the first person puts their card in a discard pile and the player to Player #2’s left draws a card. If more than two cards of the same suit are drawn in a row, add all the values up and all of the players must drink. Smile You need: Approx 6-8 guys or girls (all one sex or mixed, for that matter) You sit around a table with a table cloth that hangs to the floor. The participants drop their pants to their ankles and a willing person goes under the table to do whatever s/he wishes. The first “player” to smile has to drink.

Master Mixology Johnny Vegas

1/3 shot Jose Cuervo Gold 1/3 shot raspberry pucker 1/3 shot red bull Mix all three in a shaker (don’t shake too hard, red bull will bubble too much) with ice and strain into a shot glass. Should come out an orange color if made correctly.

Gummy Worm

1 part raspberry vodka 1 part apple pucker 1 part sour mix 1 part cranberry juice Mix into a shaker over ice and strain into a shot glass

White Lightning

1 part Raspberry vodka 1 part pink lemonade Slice of lemon Combine raspberry lemonade and vodka in a shaker and poor over ice. Add lemon slice. Drink quickly!

Scooby Snack

Splash of Lemon Lime Soda 1/2 shot of Banana Liqueur 1/2 shot of Melon Liqueur 1 1/2 ounce shot coconut Rum Combine with ice or strain as a shot

Blow Off You need: A deck of cards and 2+ people Put a whole stack of cards on top of a beer bottle. Going around in a circle, the object of the game is to blow just one card off at a time. If a person blows more than one card off, they have to drink that many gulps of their drink. When you run out of card, restack them. 45

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