The Disfigured Man

E. Larson Gunness 641 Pleasant Street Belmont, MA 02478 617-484-8471 [email protected]

Approx. Word Count 1,220

The Disfigured Man On ‘til Morning

Eric was standing in the gate area waiting to board his flight, when he noticed a tall man with a disfigured face. The man had a thick, wine-colored birthmark that began at the back of his neck, and then spread over his jawbone and cheek to his upper lip, where it drooped down in a bulge that covered part of his mouth. The bulge seemed supple, as it was moved in and out by the man’s breathing. The man wore a blue blazer, metalrimmed glasses, and a baseball cap. When his row was called, Eric had to pass close to this disfigured man. As he approached, their eyes met and held for a moment. Engaged by the man’s stare, Eric blushed. He did not want to confront the man – better to leave him his privacy, better to pass by and continue on. He forced his eyes onto the floor. The man stepped aside and made a faint horse-like sputter as Eric passed by.

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Eric walked down the jetway, shuddering. He felt relieved to have put some distance between him and this sorrowful being. How hard this man’s life must be. Years of living with such a deformity must be exhausting. An attractive flight attendant greeted Eric as he boarded the plane. She was had brown hair and large eyes. Eric was struck by the contrast between the pretty appearance of this woman, and the grotesque presence of the disfigured man, now far behind him in the terminal. The flight was full. Eric watched as the other passengers boarded and settled into their seats. An elderly tourist couple, wearing sweatshirts from one of their recent trips, found their place two rows in front of Eric. They bickered as they negotiated her carryon into the overhead compartment. The disfigured man arrived a moment later, and settled into the aisle seat next to the tourists. He was just to the right of the flight attendants’ station, near the lavatories. Because he was at the aisle, passengers had to walk past him on the way to their seats. Each passenger would initially react with shock to this thing they had discovered in their path. They would look away. Then, they would turn back to him and have one good look before they passed. Before take off, the attractive flight attendant leaned forward and spoke to the disfigured man. She gave him a calm genuine-looking smile. Eric was impressed by her display of poise and self-control. She, he thought, was a true professional. At the beginning of the flight, Eric tried to absorb himself in the work he had brought with him. Though others about him might now have time to nap or relax, he was too busy. He had important work to do, had to get ready for important meetings.

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But his attention was scattered. Every time that someone arose to walk in the aisle, he caught himself looking up, watching, and then remembering the work at his lap. Twice he saw the disfigured man get up to use the restroom at the front of the cabin. The first time he got up, Eric was deliberate in not staring at him when he emerged from the lavatory and ducked back into his seat. The second time was right after breakfast had been cleared. There were people in line before him, so the disfigured man loped to the back of the line to await his turn. Directly before him in line was a pleasant-looking woman of perhaps fifty years of age. She had on khaki slacks and a cotton sweater. She visibly jumped when she turned around to find the disfigured man hunched above her. Embarrassed for them both, Eric looked back down at the papers on his tray. A moment later, he looked up again and saw that the pleasant woman and the disfigured man were speaking. She was grinning plainly. He had his arms folded at his chest. How nice, thought Eric, that she should treat this man with such attention and empathy. When Eric looked forward another time, he saw that the disfigured man was now in his seat and was attempting to interact with the tourist couple beside him. Eric could only see the backs of their heads – the woman was motionless, her husband had turned pink. Now here, Eric thought, must be an awkward scene. But then again, bless them and their willingness to submit to a discussion with the disfigured man. Here are two more decent people, deciding to treat this man with patience and compassion. As they spoke, Eric listened to the sounds of their voices. If he were only one seat closer, he could probably have distinguished their words and discerned their meaning.

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Little by little, as he heard them, he realized that it was the disfigured man who seemed to be leading the conversation. The tourist couple, more relaxed than before, was now sharing with the man a sort of intimacy. The three frequently laughed, leaning slightly forward and toward each other. Later, when Eric looked up, the trio had been joined in conversation by the attractive flight attendant, whose duties seemed to have subsided for a time. Another woman, the pleasant one who wore the cotton sweater, had also paused to listen in. The two women were standing against the cabin wall facing the disfigured man as he sat and spoke to them all. Eric could clearly see the expressions on the faces of the two standing women. They both appeared pleased and calm as they looked into the eyes of the disfigured man. When he reached humorous portions of his tale, they all laughed, together. Eric rose from his seat and picked his way forward to the lavatory. As he relieved himself, he thought of how misguided his reactions had been to this disfigured man. Initially, he had wanted to just leave the man to himself. Now, he saw that the man wanted contact, intercourse with the world around him. Eric’s silence had been more like a rebuke. He emerged from the lavatory, his sense of openness renewed. He looked toward the disfigured man, prepared to greet him and respond with fellowship to any overtures. But the disfigured man had his head down, the brim of his baseball cap effectively shielding Eric from view. The tourist couple, as well, did not look up. The flight continued to its destination, the plane landed, the passengers prepared to deplane. The disfigured man exchanged kind good-byes with the tourists and the

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attractive attendant. He crouched through the plane’s door. Then, raising himself up to his full height, he left to face another airport filled with shock and aversion. Eric struggled his baggage into the aisle and put on his coat. Someone bumped him from behind, but he didn’t turn around. As he left, he received his “Bye, now,” and “Take care,” from the attendant and crew. In the jetway and then the main terminal, he looked for the disfigured man. But he had disappeared.