January 2008

South Main Monthly Vol. 3 No. 1

South Main Speakers, District 56, Club 8609

January 2008

The mission of the Toastmasters club is to provide a mutually supportive and positive learning environment in which every member has the opportunity to develop communication and leadership skills, which in turn foster self-confidence and personal growth.

IN THIS ISSUE: • President's Corner • Milestones Lu Yao

President’s Corner

• Calendar of Events Turn Your Accent into an Asset – Educational Session Officer and new member induction ceremony Get coached to speak! Champ Camp

• Features “Christmas Traditions” by Erika Parrish “Champions’ Lessons – part I” by Michael Plaks “Holiday Messages Require Pen and Ink" by Renay Jacob “Night at the Symphony” by Erika Parrish

• Ask the Master How do you write a speech?

The South Main Monthly is a monthly publication of the South Main Speakers Toastmasters club. We meet every Sunday at 1:30 p.m. in 10305 South Main Street (Houston Chinese Church), Room 411. For more information, please visit our website at: http://groups.msn.com/southmainspeakers If you have any comments, contributions, or suggestions concerning this or future issues, please send them to [email protected]. Thank you for reading! -Vivek Rajan, Editor

Happy New Years and Welcome Back! By Vivian Li, CC I hope you are as excited as me about a new year with South Main Speakers! In our second meeting of the year, January 13, professional inspirational speaker and fellow Toastmaster Ola Joseph will give an education session “Turn Your Accent Into an Asset.” Find more information inside this current issue. Please make sure to invite all your friends to this informative and dynamic talk. Kudos to Judy Yan and Grace Hu for their special efforts in publicizing this event to the press. Also this month, start preparing your best speech because the spring contest season is just around the corner! In February we will hold the Evaluation and International Speech Contests. The winners will serve as our representatives at the next level. Contests are the best way to motivate yourself to improve quickly, so I really encourage everybody to participate. As our group New Years resolution for 2008, lets all resolve to become even better speakers and leaders by giving more speeches than is required of us, volunteering for meeting roles to help motivate fellow South Main Speakers, and finally attaining that communication and/or leadership award.

Milestones

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Congratulations to Lu Yao on earning her Competent Communicator award! She finished her ten speech projects from the CC manual last month to achieve this award.

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Farewell and good luck to Lu Yao. She recently took up a new job in Chicago and has already moved to the Windy City. We’ll miss you! Come and visit us when you are in town.

January 13: Turn Your Accent into an Asset An educational session by award-winning speaker Ola Joseph Ola Joseph was born on a small fishing island village in one of the poorest areas of Nigeria. He arrived in the U.S. a few years ago with less than $100 in his pocket, armed with the courage to succeed. He captures audiences with his stories of courage, perseverance and triumph over life's challenges. Ola's moving, informative and entertaining presentations help audiences set objectives and inspire them to achieve. Every presentation uses a unique blend of humor, examples and stories to inspire, motivate, and educate the audience. Ola is a United States Navy veteran, 2001 National Speakers Association Member of the Year (NSA Houston Chapter) and an author of three bestselling books and numerous audio and video programs. In this educational session, Ola will be educating us on how to deliver a dynamic speech even if English is not your first language, and how to make our accent an asset as it makes us unique.

Did you miss the outstanding presentation on Table Topics by Jim Hamilton last month? If you missed it, don’t worry, we got it all on tape! You can download the video and handout from: http://www.atmajnana.org/SouthMainSpeaker s/Videos/December16-2007/

January 20: Officer and New Members Induction Ceremony January 26, 27: Get Coached to Speak! A 2-day hands-on boot camp in Dallas organized by two World Champions - Craig Valentine and Darren LaCroix. You can sign up as an observer ($195) or as a participant ($895). For more information visit http://www.worldchampionspeakers.com/champcamp -coach.htm. South Main Monthly 2

Christmas Traditions by Erika Parrish

My husband Jim and I have had so much fun over the years making it as magical as we could for our boys during the holiday season. Today I will share with you our family’s Christmas traditions. Our Christmas traditions begin the first week in November. We make our reservations for our annual family picture (everyone is in the picture, not just the kids) and order our Christmas cards from the Humane Society. As Christmas cards begin to come in, Jim plays a game with me every day after checking the mailbox. We play, “guess the sender of the Christmas card.” He tells me the address, excluding the city and state, and I guess the sender. I’m pretty good at this game. Around the middle of December we go as a family to pick out our tree. We wait till the middle of the month because by then, prices of trees have gone from $85 to $35! We decorate the tree together while we listen to our Christmas records. I love hearing Bing Crosby, The Osmond Boys, and Alvin and the Chipmunks sing Christmas songs! With great music like that, how can you not get in the Christmas spirit? Christmas Eve is such an action pack day in our home. During the day we clean the house. I trick the boys into thinking Santa won’t come if the house is messy and dirty. I call it Sanitizing for Santa! Later in the evening we all attend the Candle Light Service at our Church. After service is over, we drive around looking at Christmas lights. For supper that night we have Poo Poos,

that’s Hawaiian for hors-d’oeuvres. This Parrish Tradition began in 1950 but wasn’t called Poo Poos until the late 1970s after Grandma Parrish took a trip to Hawaii and thought it was fun that they called horsd’oeuvres, Poo Poos! There are three gifts under the tree, one for each boy to open. These gifts are all either a robe or Pajama. We put out cookies and milk for Santa and sprinkle magic reindeer food in the yard. After the boys are all asleep, our home turns into Santa’s work Shoppe! Jim and I get busy and finish wrapping the remaining gifts. Each year we have one roll of wrapping paper designated for all the gifts that came from Santa. I eat the cookies and drink the milk, leaving crumbs and a half empty glass of milk, as if Santa did it. Jim goes outside and makes hoof and sleigh marks in the yard so the kids know where Santa’s sleigh landed. We place all the gifts under the tree and put gifts in the stockings. On Christmas morning, around 5:30a.m., we wake up the boys and have them line up in the hall way. Grandpa plays “Oh Come all ye Faithful”, by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. The music signals everyone to come to the tree to open the gifts that Santa brought. This tradition began on the Christmas of 1949. Frank Parrish, told the kids not to come out until they heard music. That year the gift to the family was a record player. The first record bought was “Oh Come All Ye Faithful” by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. It has been a tradition every Christmas ever since. The eldest male Parrish hands each boy one gift and they can open it up at the same time. We continue to open up gifts as Christmas music plays softy in the background. Later that day, to sneak in the Spanish influence in our family, we eat Tamales, rice and beans for lunch and supper. We wrap up the holidays by putting away all the Christmas decoration on January 2nd and

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take our tree to the recycling center. I look forward to continuing these traditions for a long time even after the boys stop believing in Santa.

Champions' Lessons - part I by Michael Plaks, ATM-B

On November 16th, 2004, it hit me. If some Toastmasters went all the way to become World Champions of Public Speaking - then maybe, just maybe, they know a thing or two that I don't. As it turned out, I was wrong: they knew a whole lot more. Ever since that memorable day, I study the speaking craft from the Champions. And now I want to share some of what I learned from the Masters. Today's lesson: Enter the darn contest! Ok, the Champions did not say "darn." But they did encourage every Toastmaster to enter the club contest. If you noticed, they said "every Toastmaster." They did not say "experienced" or "talented" or not even "ready." They said - every single Toastmaster. Why? There are at least three reasons. Reason 1: it is fun! Why did we even join Toastmasters? Was it to become more comfortable and have more fun in front of live audiences? Guess what - this is exactly what contests are about. In fact, it is not much different from a regular club speech.

The difference is that your audience may include new faces, and that you have an added challenge of competing against your peers. In my book, both these factors are fun. Reason 2: you may win. Before a recent club contest, one of my friends opted to withdraw, despite my strong encouragement. All because he felt he was not ready to compete. After the contest, he came up to me and said: you were right, I could have competed and possibly even won. Exactly my point! When I competed in my very first Toastmasters contest, I did not try to win. I was just going for my #8 speech to complete the CTM program. I was rather surprised that my speech won the club contest and even won at higher levels. You just never know. In our District 56 (which is all Greater Houston and surrounding areas), there are several District-level champions who were 1st-time competitors. Reason 3, however, is the most important of all: competing pushes you to become better. Let's face it: in the club, we don't really push each other. For all the right reasons, we try to encourage each other and give positive evaluations. There is nothing wrong with this. Peer support and encouragement are essential, especially for new Toastmasters, up to a point. The inevitable point when we start coasting along, getting comfortable and lazy. Let me ask those of you who completed your 10 speeches - did you feel the difference between "before" and "after"? I am sure you did, just like I did. But what happened after that? Are you as good today as you can be? Have you achieved your absolute best? I bet not. Not yet. And I can understand. Because, once we reach the "good enough" level, our motivation naturally drops. Our fellow club members will not help, because they will

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keep patting you on the back: good job, buddy! When was the last time you heard a club evaluator say something like: this was ok, but not great - you could do so much better than that! We don't do it in Toastmasters. And this is when contests come in. To beat your fellow club members, you have to be at your best, push yourself harder - and become a better speaker in the process. David Brooks, the 1990 World Champion, says: “You do not compete because you are the best. You become the best because you compete.” The Champions often repeat: whether or not you win a trophy, you will emerge from the contest a better speaker. Which means: you will always WIN, but only if you enter the (darn) contest.

Holiday Messages Require Pen and Ink by Renay Jacob, ACS I'm not a texter. I'm a fast typist, but my fingers are not very nimble for those little bitty keys, and I don't have the knack for abbreviating words. "LOL?" "U R 2 FNY?" Whaat? The abbreviations save the typist time, but it takes me twice as long to decipher and read. I mean, it's nice that someone wants to send

you a little message immediately, and texting sure can help in an emergency, but I don't want my telephone writing me notes. I can't handle BlackBerrys, either. I’ve encountered several instances at the airport when the person in the stall next to me types away while he does his business. Can't it wait? (The BlackBerry, not the bathroom.) Text messages and e-mail. They're thoughtful, but mindless. They’re intimate and distant, both at once. As far as I'm concerned, hearing the "ding" of an in-box will never be the same as getting a letter. Remember letters, and the excitement of getting an actual letter in the mail, among a sea of bills, catalogues and other junk? When Jeanne was away in Utah, I loved receiving cards from her. She sent cards for no particular reasons at all. What's inside? The excitement is inexplicable -- the feel of envelope and paper, the style of someone's handwriting, the ink, a child's lettering, or the shaky lines of an older correspondent. Good penmanship is not one of Jeanne’s fortes, but I love it when she hand writes me something. Handwriting tells you something about a person, yet these days I have friends whose handwriting I've never seen! A letter, not a downloaded e-mail, is something special. I stopped receiving birthday cards for a while until a couple of years ago because people sent me e-cards. I cherish the rare occasion when somebody sends me an actual card. And I'm still grateful for Christmas cards, because even in this instant messaging world, the holidays are the one time of the year when you still get letters and cards. Whether they're hokey, or Greenpeace-y, or

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populational, a card or a note is a precious gift. Hey, get a pen and write, even if your fingers feel weird from scrawling something longer than your signature. Because a "Happy Hanukkah!" "Feliz Navidad!" text or a "Joyful Kwanzaa!" e-card can be deleted. Just like that.

Night at the Symphony by Erika Parrish

Words cannot express how grateful I am to have won tickets from South Main Speakers’ Membership Building Contest. Winning these tickets meant so much to me. I’ve been a Viola player for twenty years! If I wasn’t a nurse, I would probably be performing with the Houston Symphony myself! I knew if I won, I would take my Father-in-Law with me. He has a deep appreciation for the Chorus since he was in various choirs and Barber Shop groups throughout the years. I also enjoy watching as he pretends to conduct an orchestra with a baton as he listens to his music. So I knew he would appreciate going with me.

I sat at the edge of my seat the entire time. I had fun watching the featured performers on the big screen and then looking for them in the sea of players on the stage. As the Chorus powerfully sang O Holy Night a feeling came over me. The same one I get when I hear the National Anthem. Through my peripheral vision I noticed tears just streaming down my Father-in-Law’s cheek. At that moment, I was so thankful he was able to join me. I really enjoyed a rare bassoon trio performance. They played, “Bassoon it will be Christmas”. A bassoon is one of those instruments you’ve heard before, but couldn’t identify it in a line up. If you ever seen a Tom and Jerry Cartoon, a bassoon is one of the instruments used when there is a chase scene. Last, but not least, the principal pops conductor, Michael Krajewski was hilarious. I loved how he tried to hock his home made version of a Conductor Action Figure. The word “Action” is used lightly. The doll doesn’t do anything besides stand there holding a baton! His straight face humor as he explained how to use the Whip instrument was genius! It was a great night and one that I will never forget. Again, thank you Jian for creating this Membership Building Contest and Vivian for donating the tickets.

The entire performance was awesome. Besides listening to the Symphony, we had the pleasure of hearing the Houston Symphony Chorus, vocalist, Will Maker (finalist in season 5 of American Idol), viewing dance performances and a special appearance by Santa.

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Ask the Master Dear Master, I give speeches without writing them, but most of the public speaking experts advise to write speeches. I don’t have any experience writing a speech word for word, so could you please give me some pointers on how to write speeches? — Terrible Speech Writer Dear Terrible Speech Writer, If it gives you any comfort, an old cliché tells us that most people are more afraid of public speaking than dying, yet as you’ll see in this article, learning how to write a speech is a simple process that you can quickly master. Once you’ve written your speech using the principles outlined below, your fear of public speaking will be gone forever, and Good Riddance to it! Let’s start with seven basic steps. Please sit up and pay close attention to this bit, because you can’t really leave any of these steps out. Below the basic steps are three bonus ninja speaking tips I’ve picked up in the course of writing, delivering and listening to hundreds of speeches over the years. Step Zero: STOP! Did you see what I just did? Please re-read that last paragraph again, because it’s vitally important. In just

three simple sentences, I set your expectations about what to expect in this article, unobtrusively gave you some information about me to add to my credibility, and got you to sit up and pay SPECIAL attention to my basic points. In fact, just to leave you in no doubt at all, I asked you to do that in as many words! That’s really my first basic tip on how to write a speech: everything you say in a speech should be carefully planned, thought out, written and rehearsed. NO AD-LIBBING! With a prepared speech, your greatest asset, and one that your audience won’t even be aware of, is the luxury of having time to prepare and hone your wise words. So use it wisely, Grasshopper. Here are the seven Basic Steps: 1. Carefully write, rewrite and if necessary rewrite again your first three to five sentences. You will utter these words during the single most important moment of your speech. Your audience is getting to know you, and already form opinions about you, your style and how receptive they’ll be when you get to the point. So include in your intro all the elements you need to set the tone, introduce yourself and make the exact first impression that YOU want to give them. Rehearse this using specific words. Change them if they’re not perfect. “Try on” various tones of voice, tempos, volumes. Whisper. Pause. Shout. Rehearse all this until you can do it in the shower. In fact, prove it by DOING it in the shower. You can’t take your notes in there, so this will give you the confidence you need that you KNOW this bit. Feel free to scrub up a little while you’re in there! 2. OK, back to work. Now, write a crisp summary of the points you made during

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your speech and a smooth transition to your closing remarks. I know you haven’t written the speech yet, so for now, use anything you want to represent your points, like newspaper headlines from this morning’s paper. Your mission here is to capture the tone you want to maximize the impact of your closing. DON’T CHEAT – you’ll only be cheating yourself. Your closing words are just as important as your opening. This and maybe one point you talk about will be remembered. So make it memorable. Shout if you have to. Rehearse it like before. REALLY IMPORTANT: Close with one or two very carefully crafted sentences. OK, practice time. Go back for another shower. No notes this time! 3. You should now smell nice and have a Hollywood blockbuster opening and climax for your speech. If you’re at that point, you can get dressed again, you won’t need another shower till later. Sorry about all the towels we’re using in this lesson. Nothing I could have said in the title to prepare you for it would have kept your interest! 4. What you need now depends largely on your speech’s purpose. So before you start cutting facts out of newspapers, be really clear about what you want to achieve, and write another few sentences, again using careful phrases, to establish your purpose beyond any doubt. Even if you don’t actually say these words in your speech, just writing it out concisely gets it straight in your own head. Having a polished phrase or two at your disposal can also be a lifesaver if you’re asked questions at the end. 5. Finally, you need to research the heck out of a small number of points you want to get across. Gather all the material you can on your topic. Don’t

judge yet, just gather. You have no excuse for lack of relevant and memorable material, or unchecked facts with the Internet at your disposal. When you’ve done this, organize your material into sub-topics – very broadly, this isn’t your speech. 6. Now comes the only hard part of the whole exercise. Out of your vast collection of web and print clippings, photos, audio clips, statistical tables, government reports, dictionaries of quotations, historical documents, DVDS…, select RELEVANT supporting material for NO MORE THAN THREE main points you’d like to make in your speech, and put the rest away for another time. Be brutal, you don’t need it all just now. Organize each of your sub-topics for maximum impact. The most important one should come first, then the others in INCREASING order of importance. There are various theories on why this order has the most impact, like catching people before they’ve had a chance to glaze over. That’s WAY too cynical for me. Your speech is already a dazzler, so just trust that this is the case and try it out. So just to reiterate that, if you had 5 points to make (and you don’t because I’ve said stick to 3!), numbered from least to most important, you should deliver them in this order: 5, 1, 2, 3, 4. If you see signs of glazing eyes, or hear any snores any time between 5 and 4, skip straight to your last point, do your well-polished closing and sit down. I’ll repeat that point about cutting out material. I know It’s tempting to find a place in your speech for some great anecdote or fact you want to share, even if it’s slightly offtopic and takes 3 minutes to deliver. Less is definitely more when learning how to write a speech. You really,

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really, must keep your speech to three points. Don’t cheat: you need three (two is better) clearly distinguishable points. Otherwise you’ll dilute your excellent content and lose some of your audience. 7. Practice, Practice, and Practice. I can’t emphasize this enough. Knowing how to write a speech and delivering that speech effectively are two different things. I once gave the performance of my life and won a regional Toastmasters humorous speech contest, having never had the courage to even enter a contest before. How did I do it? I rehearsed in front of an audience. A real audience, made up of several stuffed toys animals belonging to my son who was then a year old! Believe me, it’s quite scary trying to make Paddington Bear laugh, for all his renowned comic escapades. Ninja Bonus Tips We’re near the end of your attention span – I know. Never say I’m not paying attention to my audience! But I promised some bonus material, and after all the washing I made you do earlier, I think you’re due some good stuff, so here goes. My first bonus tip is really just Step 7 in disguise. You have to practice. It takes away the fear. Don’t cheat, really – don’t. I thought this particular piece of advice was just patronizing waffle, until my humorous speech contest incident. I was so terrified of being complete rubbish that I rehearsed that speech until I was sick of it, and ended up winning not just once, but three times, at progressively higher levels in the tournament. And I had no fear, because I knew every word, whisper, pause, gesture and smile of that speech. I could probably deliver it now, 10 years later. Maybe I’ll

have a shower after I finish writing this and do just that. My second bonus tip for ninja speakers. One more after this, then we’re done. Don’t stop at writing just your speech. Think bigpicture. Unless you trust your host to introduce you really well and set the scene like Jay Leno’s warm-up act, you should really write your OWN introduction. Most hosts will be delighted if you hand them an index card to read, and you’ll be assured that the audience is properly prepared for you AND your speech before you get up. A good intro should include your name, one or two sentences about your background or expertise, and it should end with the title of your speech. And that nicely brings us to my final ninja bonus tip. Ironically, this is the FIRST thing your audience will notice. Your speech NEEDS a great title. Your title is like your press agent – it goes ahead of you, and appears in any printed materials about the event. It sets expectations. Put as much effort into picking a doozie title as you did rehearsing your opening, and all will be hunky dory. Again - don’t cheat on this step – you’ll spoil the GREAT speech you’ve put together. Many a decent speech has been killed by poor pre-conceived ideas the audience got from a rubbish or absent speech title. So that’s it. If you follow these basic steps, there’s really no need to be afraid of public speaking. Don’t confuse nerves with fear. Nerves under control will turn your new understanding of how to write a speech into a memorable event for you and your audience.

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