I Can Still Hear The Laughter

XAVIER ENGLISH BOOK SERIES III I Can Still Hear the Laughter During parties, most especially those with lots of gorgeous women, many of my friends jump at the opportunity to be the center of attention. Whether it be performing magic tricks or singing on the Magic Sing, my buddies are always leaping into the spotlight and trying to show others what they’ve got. Not me, though. I’ve always been the shy and reserved one. I’m not sure myself, but it’s probably because I was terribly embarrassed in a children’s program that I am awfully shy today. My humbling experience took place during the Parents’ Day program when I was in kindergarten. Our teachers had been rehearsing us on our various numbers weeks before the day of the important event. The performance of our section was a song-and-dance number on various fruits and vegetables, and I considered myself fortunate since I had been chosen as among the lead characters in the presentation – the cabbage. My mom had worked painstakingly to make my costume for me, and the night before the pageant, when I tried out the costume at home, I couldn’t stop smiling; I really did look like a cabbage. My mother had cut out pieces of beige cloth, painted them various shades of green, and then layered them intricately. Although the outfit was quite heavy, I was determined, more than ever, to give my best performance in it. On the day of the program, out came the radish, the beet, and the rest of the other vegetables. Despite their colorful costumes, I was brimming with confidence since I knew that my outfit was the best. Soon enough, I heard my cue. The voice on the tape sang, “and of course, the delicious green leafy, the cabbage!” Upon hearing my signal to

MY VIEW OF THE WORLD AROUND ME

come out, I confidently glided unto the stage, tiptoeing as I had practiced many times before, and then sang my first few lines, “I am cabbage, green leafy cabbage!” Suddenly, just after singing the last syllable of the line, I felt my left calf cramp. It could have been caused by the weight of the costume or it could have been from the tiptoeing, but whatever the reason, I felt my leg give way. The next thing I knew, I was rolling all over the stage like a cabbage gone mad. Not wanting to ruin the entire show, I continued to croon my lines. “In soups, salads and stews, I assure a healthy you!” Then suddenly, I felt a thud, and abruptly, the rolling stopped. It was then that I realized I had fallen off the stage and that my costume had broken in half. I was in nothing but my underwear. The laughing from the crowd was, to me, absolutely deafening, unforgiving, and frightening. Today, eighteen years after that experience, I am still haunted by it. Whenever I find myself in a situation that requires me to be in front of spectators, it’s almost as if I can hear echoes from the laughter of the audience in the kindergarten program. For this reason, I dread being in front of a crowd; in fact, I dread even the chance of being in front of a crowd. It’s gotten so bad that even when the moment calls for a simple prayer in front of a few people, I can’t get through the task without hyperventilating or much worse, getting teary-eyed. Will I ever get over my overblown stage fright? I’m not very sure; I’ve been seeing a speech therapist since I was ten to fix the problem, sadly without much improvement. However, it never fails to overwhelm me when I think about

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XAVIER ENGLISH BOOK SERIES III how a simple event like a foul-up from a kindergarten show can affect someone so deeply for the rest of one’s life. I just hope it doesn’t have to happen to anyone else.

MY VIEW OF THE WORLD AROUND ME

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