Girly Algorithm

The Algorithm --------------------1. Search for a not-most-beautiful girl. Find a way to talk to her. Finding a reason depends on your skill. You have to find a reason because she would never approach no matter how frustrated she is. 2. If you don't succeed got to step 1 again. 3. Start with some concrete point and slowly slowly shift to her personal details. 4. Ask her for coffee like: "You are busy right?".She will say "No". and then "You don't like coffee?". No direct thing like "Would you please come for coffee with me?" 5. Asking for lunch: When she has finished her lunch, approach her and ask "Had lunch?". She will say "Yes". Than say "Hey, you didn't call me". Next day she will call you.No direct pleading like: "Please have a lunch with me." 6. Well, how to ask for having coffee outside(in some caf�): Tell her that this coffee is not good. Tell some technical reason. Then tell her that that caf� nearby serves a damn good coffee. Next day either she will ask or you ask her in some indirect fashion. 7. When you want her to take on some outing... "You know last evening it was really a great fun. We all friends went to ABC park. It's a beautiful place..cool breeze..Complete silenece..no clamouring..No rush..Wow..We enjoyed a lot." Hopefully next time she will ask herself to take her to that place. if she doesn't, ask "Hey lily, we are going to ABC park. Are you coming?" She will. No compelling..Nothing.. 8. If you don't succeed go to step 5 again. 9. When you cross the road, she needs help..Just hold her hand and help crossing.. This will be your first time when you are touching her..Dont be excited..Pretent as if everything is normal. Now even after crossing the road don't leave her hand. Evening while talking. If she throws your hand away..and gets serious..Just get up and sit far from her and say "is that fine now?".. Show a bit of anger..and make her realize that she is a very backward and has no sense of new society.. "Don't know in what era you are living". 10. If you don't get a chance to hold her hand, just be patient till you drag discussion to some Palmist's story. 11. Now 50% part is finished. 12. Keep on playing small tricks.. Try insinuating thoughts into her mind:"Aishe mat dekho..Pyar ho jayega..hehe:)(followed by smiles)". 13. rest is on you.. 14. NEVER EVER SAY 'I LOVE YOU'..THIS IS THE MOST FATAL STATEMENT...IF SPOKEN BEFORE COMPLETE FLOURISHMENT OF LOVE. Theory: When you say the things like "I LOVE YOU"," I love you so much"," I can't live without you".It means you have

completely given your self into her hands and you are on her sympathy now. She would never fall for you...and if u rnt rich she would never marry.. "Tum bas ek friend ban kar rah jaoge"... Actually, The whole system is made up of small units having relation of master-slave.(as per Lacan) Once you propose or say the things like "I love you..I can't live without you"..you become slave. 15. If you really want to admire(not adore) her: "Hey, pink color suits you. You are looking cute". "I like the way you say "oh.no""...etc etc. "ADMIRE IN INSTALLATIONS". 16. On phone..Always hang the phone before she does. "Hey, I was just thinking about you. bla bla bla... I have got some call We will talk in the evening/after some time". C program ======= #include #define MAAL beautiful_lady main() { goto college; scanf("100%",&ladies); if(lady == MAAL) line++; while( !reply ) { printf("I Love U"); scanf("100%",&reply);

}

if(reply =="GAALI") main(); /* go back and repeat the> > process */ else if(reply == "SANDAL ") exit(1); else if(reply == "I Love U") { lover = MAAL; love = (heart*)malloc(sizeof(lover)); } goto restaurant; restaurant: { food++; smile++; pay->money = lover->money; return(college);

} if(time==2.30) goto cinema; cinema: { watch++; touch++ ; if(intermission)

{

coke++; smoke++; }

}

if(time ==6.00) goto park; park: { for(time=6.30;time<=8.30;time+=0.001) kiss = kiss+1; } free(lover); return(home); if(time ==9.30) goto pub; pub: { friends++; party++; booze++; smoke++; if(pub.close()) {

pay->bill; come->out; }

} if (highly->intoxicated) goto friendsroom; else { sweetpan++; polo++; goto home; } friendsroom: { goto sleep;

} home: { if(mom.shouts()) { reason=(combinedstudy || projectwork || friendsbday); say->reason; } if(dad.shouts()) shut->yourmouth; call->lover; if(phone->voice==(lover_dad->voice || lover_mom->voice)) {

hang++; } else if(phone->voice==lover->voice) { for(time=12:30;time<=1.30;time+=0.001) { say->ILuvU; scanf("100%",&reply); /* "I Love U" already stored in reply*/ } } goto sleep; } sleep: { *(dream)=love; } }

patches & updates will arrive soon...................