Daily Reflections For Bunyan

Daily Reflections for Bunyan Bunyan 1 Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners: Or Brief Faithful Relation Exceeding Mercy God Christ his Poor Servant John is a work by John Bunyan that seems to be reflective of religious fanaticism. The writing style is somewhat reminiscent of that of Augustine. The first sentence seems to set the tone for the first 100 paragraphs, with Bunyan saying, “In this my relation of the merciful working of God upon my soul. (1)” He calls God merciful indication the emphasis he will later put on forgiveness and salvation and refers to his soul, foreshadowing the extensive reflection partake of himself in relationship to the afterlife. Bunyan describes his beginnings as humble, “being of that rank that is meanest, and most despised of all the families in the land (2)”. He then chides himself for sins that don’t seem very uncommon, like cursing swearing, and lying, claiming these things made him have but few equals. In this point many of the autobiographies we have read thus far seem similar- they start in the context of the author believing he had a sinful childhood. He then talks about the books The Plain Man’s Pathway to Heaven and The Practice of Piety as begetting “within me some desires to religion (16)”. He continues on with more stories of his sins after that moment, like playing Cat on Sabbath, until a poor religious person talked to him about the scriptures. That seemed to be the turning point in his spiritual life. He then continues a discussion of living a good life in God while dealing with sin and societal temptations. He expends a significant amount of effort worrying about what it takes to obtain salvation and how pivotal a role faith plays in this. He seems to lack confidence in his good of God and the fate of his soul. He continues to have trouble comforting his spirit, saying things like, “I would find my heart to shut itself up against the Lord (81)” until the end of the first 100 paragraphs. As a result, I thought his self reflection to be overly verbose and his

resolve to be wishy-washy. It contrasted other stories where a more sudden move towards solid faith may take place. Bunyan 2 In paragraphs 101-200, Bunyan continues to discuss his sin to a point where he seems to be pathologically impaired. He keeps on obsessing and worrying about how awful his sins are, and just as he seems to have found comfort in faith, he goes back to his state of overflowing anxiety. He says, “Now I thought, surely I am possessed of the devil: at other times, again, I thought I should be bereft of my wits. (101)” He clearly recognizes the internal turmoil within him and is being pushed to the edges of his emotion. His delusions seem almost Schizotypal and his notions of faith prove cause significant impairment in his everyday life. For example he spent a significant amount of time lying in bed due to a temptation in his mind telling him to, “sell and part with Christ (139)”. He calls himself a “burthen and a terror (149)” to himself. And in paragraph 158 he “began to compare [his]… sin with the sin of Judas”. This is especially revealing of the extremism of his mentality, since the Bible makes it pretty clear that Judas’ sin of betraying Jesus just for some money was one of the gravest sins in the New Testament. Bunyan does not dwell on all the passages in the New Testament that talk about salvation and forgiveness nearly as he does the ones that talk about sin and damnation. Overall, I feel very sorry for Bunyan. His obsession with salvation is leads him to a physical life of self-inflicted torment. His case represents the danger of religious extremism and excessive self pity that perpetuates into a cycle of anguish. He does offer some hope in paragraph 200 that he will finally get over sin when he saying, “Lord, Satan tells me, that neither Thy mercy, nor

Christ’s blood, is sufficient to save my soul: Lord, shall I honour Thee most, by believing Thou wilt, and canst? or him, by believing Thou neither wilt not nor canst? Lord, I would fain honour Thee, by believing Thou wilt and canst. (200)” Hopefully, he will heed the meanings of his words. Bunyan 3 In the last part of Bunyan’s narrative, he continues with his internal debate about how grave his sins are and whether they will stop his soul from getting into heaven. He asks questions like, “Whether the blood of Christ was sufficient to save my soul? (204)” For this particular question, Church tradition makes it clear that God sacrificed his son so that we can go to heaven. The fact that he continues to obsess over is seems somewhat unreasonable. He continues switching his ideology between a merciful God and an unforgiving God. He uses Bible quotes that are sometimes pulled out of context and linked to each other in a seemingly unintended way to provide support for this constant changing opinion- he tries to say he is damned for some reason or talks about his insecurities about salvation and then just uses a quote to counter his argument and say his saved, repeating this process many times. I think he would have a much easier time reaching conclusions about his salvation if he made a concise list of his concerns and then combined the many items that have been overlapping in nature though out the entire book. Later on he talks about the calling he gets to do “Work of the Ministry” and then his arrest that follows thereafter. He says, “…God had counted me worth to understand something of His will in His holy and blessed word, and had given me utterance in some measure, to express what I saw to others, for edification (265).” Lastly, he talks about his imprisonment. He says after five years of preaching, he was arrested for unlawful assemblies and was persecuted because he

would not conform to worship of the Church of England. He considers his duty to God in light of his being unable to serve his family while imprisoned. History tells us that after being imprisoned twice, he eventually was able to live a free life. Bunyan 4 The last part of Bunyan’s work includes a brief conclusion which seems to be the most clear and concise part of the book, along with an account of his court proceedings and a separate account of Bunyan’s life and death written by a contemporary. Perhaps what struck me most in these paragraphs is the sadness which I felt upon Bunyan’s death. While he did seem to have excessive ramblings which did not serve as my favorite readings for this course, one could not help but develop a connection with him and feel for his anguish. In his conclusion, Bunyan seems to have finally found peace within himself through an acknowledgement of the saving grace of God/Jesus. He seems to indicate this when he says, “… when after sin committed, I have looked for sore chastisement from the hand of God, the very next that I have had from Him, hath been the discovery of His grace (2).” He still acknowledges that he has temptations within him, referring to the seven abominations in his heart in the sixth paragraph. In the last paragraph of his conclusion, he ends by providing a rather beautiful account of the effect of his reflection and what he discovers in the work. He talks about, among other things, being pressed to pray to God, trusting in the wisdom of God, and Christ’s ability to carry Bunion through this world. By the end of the novel, I came to realize that the reason Bunyan obsessed about faith so much was because it was the center of his life that gave it meaning.

Bunyan, John. Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners: Or Brief Faithful Relation Exceeding Mercy God Christ his Poor Servant John. Penguin Putnam: New York, 2002.