Ck

/CK/

College Recipes

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INDEX 04, Mushroom Broccoli/Chicken with Rice, 4 04, Paprika Chicken, 4 04, European Dumplings, 4 05, Stu¤ed Green Peppers, 5 05, Rice that isn’t burnt to hell, 5 06, Salmon with stir-fry vegetables, 6 06, Stew-so-easy-you-could-make-it-while-donkey-punching-your-sister, 6 07, cheap-ass chili, 7 07, Basic Cheese Sauce, 7 08, Pancakes 08, Potato-egg casserole 08, Chicken Parmesan 09, Swiss Steak 09 Spinach Casserole 10 Koreak-leftover-rice-dish-you-can-make-in-the-microwave aka spicy rice 11, Easy Seasoning for Kalbi (Korean BBQ) 11, Polish Drop Potato Dumplings 12, Homemade Mac and Cheese 12, Roast Garlic Mashed Potatoes 13, Créme Brulee 14, Frozen Fruit Syrup 14, Oven Baked "Pie-Filling" 14, Cabbage Salad 15, Farmers Breakfast 15, Homefries 16, Caprici Salad (A fake salad that might impress the womenz) 16, Potato Pancakes (Latkas?) 2

17, Bean Salad 17, Minute Steak with sauce 18, Casserole 18, Shoyu Chicken 19, Easy and cheap potato pancakes 19, Potato and leek soup, with lamb (P) 23, Mug Brownies 23, Jäger schnitzel (P) 25, Mexican Lasagna 26, Curry (P) 28, Russian Tea Cakes 29, Bread (P) indicates that there are images that go along with the recipe. number infront of recipe is the pagenumber.

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Collection of recipes from /ck/ with contributions from various anonymous posters as well as some named ones (Ruen, Jentaro). OP suggested sauteeing some onions and garlic to add to the dishes, but since all the recipes are mangled up here i removed it, but keep it in mind. Oh hay /ck/ I wrote out some recipes for you. Some cheap, tasty, college budget recipes. I suggest you add to this thread too.

Mushroom Broccoli/Chicken with Rice cost: approx 12-15$ 4 heads of broccoli 8-10 chicken thighs, skinless 2 cans of cream of mushroom soup Cut up chicken breasts into bite sized pieces and line the bottom of a roasting pan or ceramic baking dish with a lid. Empty one can of soup onto the chicken and stir well. Cut the broccoli into similar sized pieces, and top. Empty the second can over top of it, and stir well. For optional tastiness, add shredded cheddar and/or Parmesan. Cook for 45min-1hour at 450degrees or until the broccoli looks ’wilted’and is softened/chicken is cooked. Serve with rice. This makes enough for 4 college students for supper, as well as one or two tupperware containers of leftovers for lunch if you’re lucky.

Paprika Chicken cost: approx. 2-5$ per serving 1 chicken breast to; 2 ? regular sized onions (the ones you buy in 10lb bags) 2-5 tablespoons of Sweet Paprika Chop onion into large chunks and fry lightly in oil until clear and soft. Chop the chicken into bitesized pieces. Move the onion to the edges of the pan, and place the chicken in the middle. Stir until chicken is completely cooked (this is important else you get strange textured chicken). Add paprika to taste, and …ll the pan with enough water to not cover. Simmer for 1-4 hours or until the paprika becomes pasty. Add water as needed. Serve with dumplings and sourcream(see dumpling recipe). Serves 1 person ? multiply the recipe by the amount of people you intend to serve. Note: If you “boil”the mixture the onions will turn to mush and the chicken will become tough, dry, and ‡aky. This is best done in a crock pot on low heat for all day. I prefer my chicken with a strong paprika ‡avour, but you can easily use very little.

European Dumplings cost: approx. >1$ 1 egg to; approx. 1 cup milk Flour 4

teaspoon of salt and sugar. Before starting, get a deep pot and …ll it with water and boil it with a pinch of salt in the water. Beat the egg, salt, sugar and milk together until it has a light yellow consistency. Add the ‡our until it turns into a paste that sticks to your …ngers like glue (If it turns out watery, keep adding ‡our until it reminds you of bread dough). Clean o¤ your hands and take two spoons, scooping out the mixture with one while using the other to scrape it o¤ into the water. The dumplings will ‡oat to the top of the water when done; remove and keep as dry as possible. Serve with either very light recipes, or with heavy ones for winter. Note: These are extremely heavy (they are basically boiled dough). I made 1 ? this recipe and it fed 4 people, as well as 2 lunches with the Paprika chicken.

Stu¤ed Green Peppers cost: approx 5-10$ 4 Green/Yellow/Red Peppers 1-2lbs ground beef (any other meat will work …ne as well) 1 egg Splash of worchester sauce 1 tablespoon Black Pepper Liberal amount of Paprika Cut the pepper as you would a pumpkin used for carving. Hollow out the seeds and clean, making sure to remove stickers on the skin. Place it in a roasting pan or baking dish with a lid, and …ll with an inch or two of water. Put enough paprika in to turn the water red. Mix the egg, ground meat, worchester sauce and pepper, as well as any other spices. It should stay together like packed meatballs. Fill the peppers with the meat (if you have any left over, roll into meatballs and place in the pot with the peppers). Put the caps back on the peppers, put the lid on, and cook at 450F for approx. 1 hour. Makes enough for 4 people. Optional: Remove the peppers, and pour the remaining paprika/meat juice liquid into a gravy dish, and mix sour cream into it until it becomes orange. Serve over rice as a sauce with the peppers. Note: This is probably one of the cheapest meals you can make that’s extremely …lling. If you don’t have enough ground meat, you can easily put leftover rice into the mixture. Cost depends also on whether you use cheaper green peppers, or more expensive and sweeter red/yellow.

Rice that isn’t burnt to hell cost: cheap as shit you chucklefuck. Rice. In a pot, pour desired amount of rice (it will expand to 2-3x it size, so usually a handful will feed one person). Cover the rice with 1.5-2x the amount with water. Put on cold burner and turn the heat up to max, and watch it carefully. Once it starts to over‡ow, turn down the heat to simmer. Wait 10-20minutes

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until there is no visible water and remove it from heat, letting it sit for at least 5 minutes. Optional: Cook with a tablespoon of butter in the water. Note: Do not stir, and keep the lid on at all times. Stirring it makes the rice extremely gluey and watery. If you need to test if it’s ‡u¤y all the way through, use a fork to push a bit away from the side of the pot. I am also surprised by the amount of people who can barely make microwave rice, let alone actual rice, hence this entry.

Salmon with StirFry Vegetables cost: approx 5-15$ 1 Salmon steak 1 Bulk Carrot 1 Green/Red/Yellow Pepper 2 Stalks of Celery Half a head of Broccoli Any other vegetable Take a piece of tinfoil twice as tall/wide as the salmon, and grease with butter. Place the salmon in it and wrap it up. Place in the oven at 450degrees until it ‡akes and is light pink all the way through (approx 20 minutes). Test for doneness by ‡aking it with a fork; if it easily breaks apart and is a light pink colour it’s done. For the vegetables, wash it all, inspect for pesky grocery store stickers, and thinly slice. Cook in a tablespoon of oil on medium heat until the peppers are soft. Add seasonings of choice, such as; vegetable premixed spices, thai curry sauce, or just a dollop of butter. Serve the vegetables alongside the Salmon. Serves 1-2 people. Note: Buy salmon while it’s on sale (20$ for 2 long steaks that can be divided into at least 6 decent sized servings) and freeze, thawing it by taking it out of the freezer and putting it in the fridge the night before you plan to cook it. Talipia also works very well, and is much cheaper.

Stew-so-easy-you-could-make-it-while-donkey-punchingyour-sister cost: approx 10$ 1-2lbs stewing Beef, cubed 3 large bulk carrots 1 litre of V8 juice 3-5 stalks of celery as many potatoes as you want Any other vegetable Take the cubed beef and ‡our it, then cook in a pan/dutchoven/crock pot until fully cooked. Chop the vegetables into cubes/bitesized pieces and add to the pot, pouring enough V8 vegetable/tomato juice to cover it. Lower the heat to gently simmer it. Cook for 2-3 hours. Serve with buttered crusty bread. This

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will make enough to serve 2-6 people depending on how many vegetables you put in it. Note: This technically can’t be called a stew I believe, but it’s good enough at the price you make it. The V8 juice also adds a lot of ‡avour, so you don’t need to own a lot of spices. The stew itself doesn’t really need to be stirred very often either, which makes it great for stove cooking while you play videogames.

Cheap-Ass Chili cost: approx 10$ 1-3lbs ground beef 2 cans of Kidney beans 2 normal sized cans of Tomatoes (diced) OR 1 Large can of Tomatoes (diced) chili powder Cook the ground beef and break it up into as small pieces as possible. Drain the extra meat juice; add the drained tomatoes and stir. For thick chili, do not drain the kidney beans ? for thinner, soupier chili drain one can of kidney beans. Add chili spice to taste (I like my deep red) and stir, and simmer for at least 3-5 hours. It will be done when the beans are soft, and everything is a rich colour and tastes of the spices you added. Will serve 2-5 people depending on the circumstance. Optional: Dark chocolate, dried peppers, peppers, celery, onion, anything you can think of. Top with grated cheddar, a dollop of sourcream, and eat with corn chips (tostitos) or buttered bread. Note: This is a very very basic recipe. It’s also extremely cheap and will taste just as good, if not better the next day. This is ideal if you are extremely poor, because canned kidneybeans/tomatoes can and will go on sale for as little as 50 cents each. It is also several times more …lling than shitty instant noodles.

Basic Cheese Sauce cost: approx >1$ 1 tablespoon ‡our 1 tablespoon butter 1 cup milk 1 cup shredded cheese (Cheddar works best) a dash of salt and pepper In a shallow pot, melt the butter at medium heat and stir in ‡our until it becomes pasty. Don’t let it bubble and burn. Pour the milk in a little at a time to let it heat it up with the ‡our/butter mixture. Add the salt and pepper. It’ll start to thicken at this point. Again, do not allow it to boil. Add the shredded cheese (as thinly grated as possible) and stir in until all the cheese is used. You can boil it now at this point lightly, but personally this is the part I take it o¤ the stove and let sit for a few moments to let it thicken. Serve on top of Vegetables, or as the base to homemade macaroni and cheese.

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Note: I don’t recommend using margarine since it’s an oil. If you’re using mixed cheese, try to make the majority Cheddar, else it’ll be really really strong. Add powdered mustard if you want more ‡avour.

Pancakes: Price: Dirt Cheap - box of premixed buttermilk pancake mix. - water - eggs - maple syrup Put the …rst three in a big ol’pot. (Just dump the mutherfucker in there) and mix it. Pour it on a griddle and fry them up at once. Smother those bitches in syrup and youve got yourself a shit-ton of pancakes. Makes about 50 servings.

Potato-Egg casserole Serves about 4 people, but you can add/take away the amount of ingredients to …t your own needs. Costs >$10 6-8 medium/large russet potatoes 6-8 large/jumbo eggs 1 c. (1/2 pkg) shredded cheddar cheese 1/2 medium/large onion (optional) salt and pepper paprika (optional) chives (optional) 1. If you like your onions to be a little more tender (as opposed to crisp and crunchy), throw them in a frying pan over medium heat for 5 minutes or so (until they start to turn a little translucent). If you don’t mind the crunch and/or hate onions, then disregard this step. 2. Boil some water. Once water is at a hard boil, gently drop the eggs in the water. To get the perfect hardboiled egg, let them boil for approximately 10-13 minutes. If you don’t cook them long enough, the yolk will be runny. Conversely, if you cook them too long, the yolk will turn greenish. 3. While your eggs are boiling, get your potatoes peeled, cubed, and in some hot water. You want them to be soft, because you’re going to mash them. 4. Preheat your oven to 400. 5. Mash potatoes, and shell the eggs, then cut the eggs horizontally into slices. 6. Layer your potatoes, eggs, onions, then cheese in a casserole dish. Create as many layers as you like, but make the top layer potatoes. Salt and pepper the top layer to your taste, and add paprika liberally. Bake for 30-40 minutes, sprinkle chives on top before serving. *We tried adding other ingredients in this recipe: mushrooms and frozen broccoli are equally delicious if added.

Chicken Parmesan (without the parmesan) 8

Serves 4 people costs >$10 (depending on how expensive chicken is) 4 boneless skinless chicken breast 1 lb (1 pkg) pasta of your choice (I recommend spaghetti) 1 jar pasta sauce of your choice 1 c. (1 pkg) mozzarella cheese 1 egg Breadcrumbs or Ritz crackers crushed into bitty pieces 1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees. 2. Heat a frying pan with olive oil on your stovetop on High heat. 3. Whisk an egg in a bowl, and pour breadcrumbs in a separate bowl. 4. Dip chicken …rst in the egg bowl, then the breadcrumb bowl, then …nally into the frying pan. Do this with all breasts. 5. Sear the chicken on the pan at high heat until the outside of the chicken is brown and appears to have a "crust." You’re not *cooking* the chicken, just searing it to lock in the moisture for when you bake it. 6. Pour half your jar of sauce in a casserole dish, then place the chicken on top of it. Pour the rest of the sauce on top of the chicken, then add the cheese being sure to cover the chicken as well. 7. Bake for 40 minutes; prepare pasta as instructed on the box. 8. Serve together and enjoy! Sprinkle some parmesan cheese on top before eating if you like.

Swiss Steak costs will vary depending on price of meat and how many people you’re serving. Steak’s expensive (~$5/lb on sale) but worth it for a treat every once in awhile. Sirloin steak 2 cans french onion soup mashed potatos 1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. 2. Put steak and cans of soup in a casserole dish. Bake for 40 minutes. 3. Prepare some mashed potatoes to go along with the swiss steak. Use the "sauce" in your swiss steak as gravy, and enjoy!

Spinach casserole Serves 4 people Costs >$5 2 -10oz pkgs of frozen chopped spinach 1 lb cooked pasta (I recommend spaghetti) 2 c. (1 pkg) shredded cheese (we usually use the "Mexican" variety by Kraft; Colby-Jack by Sargento, etc). 1/2 medium onion 1 c. sour cream 1. Cook the pasta as indicated on the box. 2. Preheat oven to 400 degrees. 9

3. Cook the spinach as indicated on the package. Be sure you drain the spinach to rid it of excess water (you can sacri…ce a towel and wring the spinach in it–your towel will forever be stained green, though). 4. Finely chop the onion into small pieces. 5. Add the spinach, pasta, sour cream, onion, and cheese in a large bowl and mix it together. Pour it all into a casserole dish and bake for 40 minutes.

Korean-leftover-rice-dish-you-can-make-in-the-microwave aka Spicy Rice serves as many people as you want provided you have enough ingredients costs vary My roommates ask me to make this for them all the time; I always use leftovers because it’s so convenient. A hell of a lot of rice (1-2 cups for 4 people) Kimchi (a Korean vegetable) Korean hot/spicy bean paste (I have no idea what it’s called in English; the label says "Go chu jang"–see picture) Leftovers* Any and all vegetables Any and all meat cut into bite size pieces (try to focus on just 1 meat if you have many to choose from) "Light" soups (such as chicken soup, kimchi jigae, or even ramen soup) -soup is optional, it just adds ‡avor. 1. Make rice. 2. Add leftovers to rice. 3. Depending on how spicy you like it, add the spicy bean paste. About 2-3 good spoonfuls if you like it on the milder side. Add as much kimchi as you please. 4. If you have any "light" leftover soup, add about a half cup of it. Mix it all together thoroughly so that the rice is a nice orangeish color from the spicy bean paste. 5. Optional step-if you have any lettuce, you can turn this dish into Lettuce Wraps. Just wash a head of lettuce and spoon rice onto a leaf of lettuce. Wrap the lettuce and enjoy!

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Easy seasoning for Kalbi (Korean BBQ) Korean BBQ is basically where you sit at a table and get plates of uncooked meat. You get to cook your meat at your table where there is a grill, and season it as you please. It’s very similar to Chinese hot pot, but instead of making it in a pot, you make it on a grill. This is a "dipping sauce" recipe for your cooked meat. Assuming the meat is unseasoned... In a small dish, pour in 2 tbsp Sesame oil, 1 tbsp black pepper, and 1/2 tbsp of salt (these are all approximations; basically just dump a bunch of salt and pepper in a small dish that already contains sesame oil. You’re supposed to have more pepper than salt, but it really doesn’t matter). Stir it all together. Dip cooked meat in, making sure that it touches the spices on the bottom. Eat to your heart’s content! *This "dipping sauce" tastes especially good if you use it in lettuce wraps. Take a leaf of lettuce, add a spoonful of rice to the middle of it, place a piece of meat on top of that, wrap it up and enjoy.

Polish Drop Potato Dumplings Cost: super cheap Ingredients: * 1 large potato, peeled and grated * 1 cup all-purpose ‡our * 1 cup whole milk * Salt and pepper to taste Bring a large saucepan of salted water to a boil. Meanwhile, in a medium bowl, mix all ingredients until a thick paste forms.

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Get half a teaspoon of the mixture and drop it gently into the boiling water. Simmer about 20 minutes or until dumplings taste done. Drain in a colander and serve as a side dish, a Lenten/vegetarian meal or in soup.

Homemade Mac and Cheese cost: approx 10$ 1 large bag of dried pasta, any kind Butter 1-3lbs of ground/strip meat, sausage, ham, etc. Left over vegetables 4-5x Cheese sauce recipe Optional spices: Dry mustard, paprika, extra pepper, hotsauce, etc. In a large pot, boil the dried pasta (I use elbow macaroni) until it is “al dente”, or otherwise, still has a …rm shape but is soft. It’s the point before it becomes mush, and after it’s lost its dried out crunchiness. While watching the pasta, cook up any left over or raw meat of your choice. You can also throw in the leftover vegetables to heat up during the last few minutes of cooking the meat. Drain the pot and put it back on the cooling burner; this will help get rid of any excess water. Prepare the cheese sauce; optionally, you can use more milk and less cheese to help it stretch further. I’d advise against using Kraft singles, Velveeta or any overly processed cheese, as it will just end up tasting pretty bad, as well as the few extra dollars spent on good cheese will make a world of di¤erence. In a baking dish, grease the sides with a thin layer of butter; this will make cleanup easier and it will slide out of the dish. Fill the dish with macaroni, while mixing in the meat/veg. Mixture. Afterwards, mix in the cheesesauce. Top with grated cheese(s), breadcrumbs, etc. Cook until bubbly and the top layer is golden brown. Serves 4-6 people. Note: If using raw vegetables such as broccoli or cauli‡ower, I’ll throw them in with the noodles to cook. I prefer not to use any starches or heavy veg, as well as crushed crackers on top due to personal preference.

Roast Garlic Mashed Potatoes cost; 1$ per serving For one serving: 6-10 Red potatoes, baby/small 2 tablespoons heavy cream (milk otherwise) 1 tablespoon chicken stock 1 tablespoon butter 1 segment of a clove of garlic Peel the garlic and remove the ends. Place in the shallow pot with a small amount of oil and cook until it’s brown and crispy on all sides. Remove from the pot, give the pot a quick rinse and …ll with water (Careful, if you use too much oil and pour water into the pot it will spit). Place the potatoes in the pot and boil at high heat until they are soft and you can push a fork all the way through without much force. Do not overcook! 12

Drain the water and place back on the cooling burner to get rid of excess water. Add all other ingredients, as well as an optional dash of salt and pepper or half a handful of cooked bacon pieces (real bacon bits work as well). Mix with a masher or a fork until it is smooth with small chunks. You want to avoid over mixing it, else it’ll get gluey, so try to fold the mixture into itself instead of just mashing it up and down. Top with a teaspoon of butter and cracked salt and enjoy. Note: Green onions, Bacon, thyme, any other spice you could think of works extremely well in this too. I used to make this at the steakhouse I worked at, except without the chicken stock and in 30lb increments.

Crème Brulee cost: approx 5$ 1/2 cup/4 ounces sugar 6 egg yolks 1 teaspoon vanilla/fruit extract 2 cups/1 pint of Heavy Cream In a medium heat pan, pour the pint of Heavy Cream (I use whipping)and let it sit until it forms a skin on the top and is thoroughly warm. Separate the eggs by cracking it open into one palm with your …ngers slightly open, pouring it from hand to hand until you have only the yolk left. If it breaks, place in a small tupperware container and save for breakfast’s scrambled eggs. Save all discarded egg whites in another bowl for the meringue recipe. Combine the egg yolks and sugar into a large mixing bowl and whisk briskly for about 5 minutes. The mixture should come away silky smooth when rubbed between your …ngers; if it still has sugar granules, continue mixing. Once the mixture is smooth, gently and slowly pour the warm cream into the mixture, whisking it quickly to prevent the egg yolks from separating and becoming scrambled eggs. You’ll know you’ve done this right when the mixture is a warm/hot, light yellow, and uniform. Add the vanilla or fruit extract and mix lightly. If there is foam at the top, fold a piece of clean papertowel into a small square and skim the top of the mixture. This will ensure that the top of the crème brulees are very beautiful. Fill crème brulee dishes up, or if you don’t have any, shallow ceramic co¤ee mugs, onion soup dishes, etc will su¢ ce. Fill only 2-3 inches tall depending on the width to ensure even cooking. Preheat the oven to 350degrees, and place the crème brulee’s in a deep baking dish. Those glass casserole dishes work perfect for this. Once all the crème brulee’s are in the dish, …ll it so that it comes up to at least half the height of the mugs you put the mix in. Cover the top with tinfoil and cook for approximately 20-30 minutes, or until you can tap the side and have it jiggle slightly like jello. Immediately place in the fridge until cool. To create a sugar crust on top without having a blowtorch, set the oven to broil and place the rack as close to the top as possible. Sprinkle a thin layer of re…ned sugar or raw sugar (please don’t use sweeteners) on the cooked, fridge cooled crème brulee and place in the oven until the top is brown. 13

Note: This recipe seems like a lot to do, but it’s very easy in practice. Tongs make taking the dishes out of the baking dish much easier as well. This is an extremely cheap dessert and even if you mess it up, you can easily throw out the messed up batch and create another. The only real expense is the heavy cream.

Frozen Fruit Syrup cost: approx 2-5$ 1 cup frozen or freshly chopped fruit 3 tablespoons sugar 1 teaspoon vanilla extract (optional) Try to use a mixture that has a lot of blue/black/rasp-berries, as well as strawberries. In a saucepan, place the chopped fruit in on medium-low heat, adding in the sugar, vanilla and a tablespoon or two of water. Mix until it becomes bubbly and syrupy, adding more water if it becomes too pasty, as well as more sugar if desired. Serve it hot on the cremebrulee, meringues, sponge cake, regular cake, brownies, vanilla icecream etc. Note: Don’t substitute the sugar with sweeteners, as the mixture doesn’t become properly syrupy (in my experiences). Cleaning the pot may also be a pain, so after removing the mixture soak in hot soapy water.

Oven Baked “Pie Filling” cost: approx 2-5$ Serves 1 4 large apples OR 1 small pineapple OR combination of fresh/frozen fruit 1 /2 a cup of brown sugar 1 /2 cup of rolled oats Unsalted chopped nuts Core the apple and/or pineapple; if you don’t have a tool to core the center out, then just cut the fruit up to remove it. Place the fruit at the bottom of the baking dish and top with the brown sugar, rolled oats and nuts. Add any optional toppings like cinnamon and raisins/craisins. Bake at 450degrees for 30-40 minutes with the lid on, or until the fruit and oatmeal is softened, the sugar is melted and syrupy and it smells like pie …lling. Note: Extremely easy, extremely tasty. When fruit goes on sale, or when they have those 50% o¤ bargain bags of apples because they expire soon, pick them up and make this recipe with them.

Cabbage Salad Cost $15-20 initially, $7ish after You need: Rice Wine Vinegar (seasoned or unseasoned) Vegetable oil Container of sesame seeds Head of Cabbage 14

a bundle of green onions 1 Ramen (oriental style) optional: a small package of sliced almonds (most likely cheaper if you get whole and slice yourself) After the …rst time buying stu¤ you should have more than enough vinegar, oil, and sesame seeds to make several more salads Break up ramen into small pieces and save the ‡avor packet Toast 1 to 2 tbl spoons of sesame seeds, ramen, almonds in the oven (~15 min at 350, stirring occasionally) Cut cabbage into small pieces (think a stick of Orbit gum) Slice onion into small pieces Put the cabbage, onion, toasted stu¤ into a bowl, and contents of seasoning packet into a big bowl Pour some oil in Be safe and start with a little and work your way up to where you like it (I have never measured the amount, gently pour oil around the outside of the bowl until you get all the way around) Add in some vinegar to taste (again I have no volume for you, but I quickly shake it like a ketchup bottle all the way around once) Stir the salad It should initially resist, but after a second or two move easily. If not add more 1)oil if you were cautious 2)vinegar if you can’t taste it in the cabbage that well

Farmer’s Breakfast cost: approx 3$ Serves 1 2 eggs 1 small vine ripe tomato, sliced 1-2 hasbrown patties OR 1 cup homefries 2-3 strips of bacon 2 pieces of toast Before starting, preheat your oven and place the hashbrown patties in the oven, or follow the Homefries recipe. Heat up a pan to medium heat, adding the strips of bacon and cook until they are soggy. Move them to the side of the pan and add the sliced tomato as well as eggs. Cook until the eggs are done; slid o¤ onto a plate with the toast and homefries. Note: Takes a little time to cook for a breakfast, but it’s a good lunch as well. You’ll want to cook the hashbrowns in the oven or another pan, else you get a soggy mixture. Cook the bacon to about half-3 /4 the way cooked you normally would eat it before adding the eggs, else you’ll have burnt bacon. Alternatively, serve with pancakes instead of toast.

Homefries 15

cost; almost nothing Serves 1 1-3 large potatoes 2 tablespoons oil (olive works nicely) seasoning Cut the potatoes up into small cubes or chunks, and wash it until the water is clear. Pat dry with a paper towel, then place on a baking sheet. I sprinkle Cajun seasonings on it, but you can use any kind you feel like. Toss with oil and place in a 350degree oven for approx. 20 minutes, or until the potato has shrunk and has a crunchy shell with a ‡u¤y inside (you may need to taste test). Note: Extremely cheap, tastes like those old mom and pop diner homefries. If you cut the potatoes smaller, they’ll be crunchier, but if you cut them larger, they’ll be ‡u¢ er.

Caprici Salad (a fake salad that might impress the womenz) cost: $15ish Vegetable oil Balsamic Vinegar Medium Sized Block of Jack Cheese (I haven’t tried pepper jack, it might be cool) Basket of small tomatoes (6 inch by 6 inch container sold at most grocery stores) Basil (buy a plant, keep in in the light, water it every few days) Stores tend to sell herbs in plastic containers pepper (whole in its own grinder is preferable) Red Onion (optional) Slice tomatoes in half, put into a bowl Cut up cheese into small cubes (about the same size as the tomato halves), put into bowl Finely cut up the basil (I like to roll up the basil and slice it all at once) Dice up the red onion into small pieces Stir it all together with some oil (again, fuck measuring salad stu¤) Put in some balsamic vinegar (as a rule of thumb, use more vinegar than oil in salads) Crack in some pepper This shit’ll get better with age, but is only good for a week or two

Potato Pancakes (Latkas?) cost: almost nothing 3 large potatoes 1 egg 2 tablespoons ‡our seasoning

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Grate the potatoes and clean the starch o¤ until the water turns clear. Pat dry with papertowel. In a mixing bowl, combine with the egg and ‡our until it has a coconut cookie type of consistency. In a pan, place 2-3 tablespoons oil or until it coats the bottom of the pan in a thin layer, and add 1-2 tablespoon portions of the mixture into the oil, ‡attening it out with the back of a spatula. Cook until it’s golden brown on both sides and ‡u¤y in the middle. If you cook too hot you may not cook the inside, but if you cook too slowly it will become greasy. Alternatively, you can just cook it in the oven on a baking sheet. Serve with sour cream or apple sauce by themselves, or serve as a sidedish to a breakfast/lunch meal. Serves 1. Note: Extremely extremely cheap. I lived o¤ this and tea for a month while mooching o¤ friends, waiting for student loans to come in. You’ll get sick of them fast this way, but potatoes are 3$ at most for 10lbs, and sourcream is 2.50 a container.

Bean Salad cost: approx 2-5$ 2 cans green beans 2 cans yellow beans 2 cans kidney beans or 1 large can. 1 1 /2 cup vinegar 1 cup sugar 2 onions 4 tablespoons oil Parsley In a sauce pan, heat the vinegar while mixing the sugar into it until it dissolves. Mix in the oil and take o¤ heat. In a large tupperware container, mix the drained and washed beans together, as well as the chopped onion and parsley. Pour in the vinegar mixture and mix until everything is coated. Store in the fridge for at least 1 day before eating. Lasts several days, or can serve 4 for lunch/snacks. Note: You can use any kind of canned bean for this, such a chickpeas. This recipe is excellent for when canned goods go on sale, or if you parents left you with some bizarre canned beans you have no idea what to do with other than to heat and eat. Oh shit sorry, I forgot to make that 2 cups vinegar and 1 cup sugar. If you like your recipes sweeter use the one I posted, but otherwise it might turn into some weird syrup.

Minute Steak with Sauce cost: approx 3$ 2-3 “Fast Fry” steak, or thin cube steak. 1 egg ‡our breadcrumbs oil 17

1 cup chicken stock 1 cup milk spices These steaks can be called anything from Fast fry, cube steak, hell, even “grilling”. They have no bones and are just thin, ‡at sheets of meat, usually marinating oriented cuts that were cut thinner to cook in less than 1-2 minutes. Batter the meat by dredging it in ‡our, dipping it into the beaten egg to completely cover it, and then batter it with breadcrumbs. I prefer using the Asian “Panko” variety because it creates a ‡u¢ er, crunchier taste. Pan fry with liberal amounts of oil on medium heat, careful not to burn. Only cook until golden brown or until the meat is done. Remove from heat when done, and place on a wire rack or paper towel. Mix in the same amount of ‡our as you have leftover oil in the pan.; if there is more than 3 tablespoons of oil left discard some. Whisk together until a warm paste, then add the chicken stock slowly until it’s heated, adding the milk in the same fashion. This will ensure that it heats up evenly and you won’t get large lumps of paste in the sauce. Add seasonings such as pepper, thyme, parsley, etc. Once it’s thickened, remove from heat and serve over top of the steak. Serves 1-2. Note: The gravy itself tastes like something from KFC because I used chicken stock and the oil had left over “batter”in it. You can easily substitute the meat for thinly pounded chicken breasts or pork as well. If you’re making a large batch, cook all of it except for 2-3 pieces, clean the pan and replace the oil, then continue and make the gravy that way. I …nd that by cooking more pieces over longer periods, the oil becomes gritty and full of burnt pieces.

Casserole: 1 can evap milk 1 can cream o’mushroom 1 jar cheeze whiz 2 cups cooked rice 1 lb cauli‡ower/broccoli Combine in croc pot, cook low for 6hrs. =delish win

Shoyu Chicken (serves number you want) Cost: Price of chicken X pounds of boneless skinless chicken thigh (1 pound serves two people easily) Rice Soy Sauce Sugar Cook rice (~1 handful of rice is a serving) Slice chicken thighs into 1/4 to 1/3 inch thick strips (if it gets really long, cut the slice in half) In a large(ish) pot: 18

Put 1/3 of a cup of sugar 1 cup soy sauce mix and throw in 1 lb of chicken (you can took up to 2 lb batches safely, just double the sugar and soy) turn on heat and stir occasionally until it starts to bubble (it will get a crazy looking yellow foam) Remove chicken for sauce (don’t let it sit in there, it will get salty) Server over rice note: shoyu is the Japanese name for soy sauce (or at least part of it), and I learned this from and Asian chick)

Easy and cheap potato pancakes cost~2-5 bucks I guess. depends if you have the ingredients. a 5lb sack of potatoes is 2-3 dollars, 6 pack of eggs is like 2 dollars ingredients for 2 people or 1 very hungry fatass 2 large eggs 4 small russet potatoes(Or 2 large) a small handful of ‡our salt and pepper to taste if you don’t like the skin, peel that shit o¤ your potatoes. Grate one potato into a large bowl that has a bit of water in it and then squish the grated potato with your hand in the water to clean them. Put the grated potato into two paper towels and wring the water out. Repeat for all the potatoes then put all the grated potatoes into a big bowl. Add eggs, ‡our, salt, and pepper and mix that shit up with your hands-yes your hands, don’t be a pussyshit- until the egg is well incorporated into the potatoes. Roughly divide the mixture into 4 parts while setting a large frying pan on medium heat with about a tablespoon of butter or oil or bacon fat or whatever you want and let it heat up a bit. Then take 2 parts of the mixture and shove that shit in the pan and divide it in half. It should …ll the pan about 1/2-3/4 inch thick, but it doesn’t really matter as long as it gets cooked through. Let the pancakes brown, then ‡ip. Repeat with the rest of the mixture. Serve with whatever the fuck you want, they’re basically hashbrowns that won’t fall apart so you can eat it with ketchup if you like, but I like butter and applesauce on mine.

Potato and leek soup, and lamb Aight guys, here’s another recipe, this time with some photos. You will need: Leeks, Potatoes, Garlic, Pepper, Lemon Juice, Chicken broth, a little oil, some butter, and some fruit juice to drink while you work :)

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You will also need a nice clean stove with a small pot, a larger pot, and a pan. Preheat the oven to about 250 degrees. Okay, it’s time to start. Also, my hand’s turned at a weird angle, but this is how you’re supposed to hold a knife, as my workmates told me when I worked in a kitchen.

This here is the lamb I’m doing up; if you have large pieces you can make very small incisions on the side into the fat, like on a rack of lamb, and insert slices of roasted garlic. I’ve topped it with rosemary, Lemon Juice, some chicken stock to keep it moist and coarsely ground pepper. Wrap it up and slow cook it for a little while until you get the doneness you want (I had to cook it to well done because my roommates hate medium rare, sob!)

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Now for the leeks. The good thing about the leeks I buy is they come in packs of 3, usually 1$ per leek. If you’re making the potato leek soup by itself, it’s usually 2$ a person at the most. This recipe I used 6$ worth of leeks, 1$ worth of potatoes, 1.69$ for the box of stock and about 50cents for the milk. Butter and garlic maybe 50cents combined. It made *alot*. As for the leeks, I roughly chop them up after washing them to this point, where the white inside starts to turn dark green.

All of the pictures after this is really blurry as fuck. Cook the Leeks in a pot with butter until it’s all soft. Alternatively, you could cook it in oil until clear, but that gives it a di¤erent taste, and I like the creaminess of the better better. Add some more Stock and lots of pepper and other spices you’d like and stir, letting it simmer away. 21

I couldn’t get any better pictures, so once the potatoes are done, drain and allow the water to evaporate on the still hot burner. Add the Leek mixture, milk/heavycream/liquid/stock until it’s covered. If you want it chunkier like a paste, I suggest mashing the potatoes into mush before adding the Leeks, and mixing in the liquid while you stir. I don’t have a proper masher yet, so I just used inherited hand mixer my grandmother gave me (it’s probably from the 60’s).

This is the point you want to stop pouring milk/stock/liquid into it. I went too far and had to drain some out (sob) but if you use less than this it will be more of a pasty, really thick soup. I know one of my friend’s likes making a cold version of this for summer with lots of milk in it. Also lol in Canada milk comes in bags! And …nally, put it all together with some buttered sour dough bread, cranberry raspberry juice and a few roommates out in the dining room. 22

Hope you guys try it sometime, overall, without the Lamb it costs about 1$ per large bowl. With the lamb, it’s about 3$.

Mug Brownie WHY THE FUCK DON’T SEE MUG BROWNIE IN HERE? 4 TABLESPOONS OF FLOUR, NIGGER 4 TABLESPOONS OF SUGAR, CUNTWAD 2 TABLESPOONS OF COCOA, ASSFUCK 2 TABLESPOONS OF OIL, SHITCOCK 2 TABLESPOONS OF WATER, COCKSUCKER STICK IT IN A GODDAMN MUG AND MICROWAVE THAT PIECE OF SHIT FOR A FUCKING MINUTE THEN ENJOY GODDAMN THAT SHITS GOOD. MM-MM, BITCHES.

Jäger schnitzel So before I start, I’d just like to say that this entire meal was an exercise in failure that turned out okay. It was just a lot of little mistakes that made it really terrible. Having to substitute almost everything didn’t help either. It started with wanting to make jaeger schnitzel and not having: breadcrumbs, red wine, a siv to make homemade spatzel in, etc. Anyways, this is what I started with. Pork cutlets, pushed thin by the bottom of a pot, ‡our, egg, breadcrumbs (panko), spatzel, mushrooms (small white ones and portabellas) aaand stock + lots of butter and oil. Ps. I’m really messy. Here’s me frying the cutlets after peppering them, ‡ouring them, coating them with egg (whip it with a bit of water so you don’t get super strong eggy taste to it), rolled into the breadcrumbs and then egg+breadcrumb one more time. This one was cooked at too high a temp and burnt, so the ones afterwards 23

were cooked much lower to make them gold and cooked throughout instead of blackened and raw.

For the spatzel, I used a 3$ bag of premade stu¤. I like this brand, and quite honestly, Spatzel is really really annoying to make. It’s basically punching dough through a strainer over a boiling hot pot of water. If you’re bent on making it homemade, I’d suggest pushing it through the backside of a cheese grater instead, or just roll them into little balls. It takes about 15 minutes to cook, but if you accidentally cook it along side the meat too soon, you can drain it, put a lid on it and let it sit there for quite a while.

Now this was the part it all fell apart. I didn’t want to use the left over oil because I cooked too many cutlets and ended up with really dirty, blackened oil. So instead, I cleaned the pan and

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started cooking with some small bits of chopped bacon, adding a large dollop of butter and then the mushrooms. I cooked extra so I could add it onto my nachos later, but I made 3 mistakes. When you cook the mushrooms and bacon, remove it from the pan and make your sauce, else it’ll turn this cement like colour. The mushrooms will also almost taste gooey because the ‡our will stick to it once you start trying to make the sauce. Secondly, I didn’t have red wine, and couldn’t get some, so instead I made it with chicken stock and then milk. Lastly, I chopped the mushrooms way too big, and should’ve pulverized into itty bitty bits if I wanted it in the sauce, or served the mushrooms on top of the strange eggy japanese breadcrumb pork AND THEN put the sauce on top. Overall it was pretty good though. I would make it again …xing those mistakes, and using redwine reduction and stock instead of milk. The meat itself was really good despite being a little too thick.

Mexican lasagna 1.5 lbs of ground beef an onion, diced a bell pepper diced can of diced tomato 2 bags of shredded cheese a jar of salsa a bag of tortilla chips brown the beef in a pan, use spices to taste. layer that stu¤ in glass pan thing, youll end up with a lot of layers, and this probably enough for two of those dishes. make sure the top layer is cheese, and the bottom layer isnt cheese cook it at 350 for like 20 minutes and try use the lowest sodium things you can, canned/jarred stu¤ has a lot of sodium already. 25

Curry Here, have a curry recipe: 1.) Get a small onion, some garlic, a hunk of ginger.

2: Chop that shit up. You don’t have to chop it …nely because you’re going to puree it later. I use a microplane for the ginger because it gets rid of the …bers, but if you don’t have one just chop that too.

3: Sautee until the onion is slightly softened

4: Puree! If you don’t have a food processor, just chop everything up …nely to start. The pureeing is more for texture than ‡avor.

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5.) Chop your meat up into bite-size pieces. I used chicken here, but pork or beef is …ne too. If you’re poor or vegetarian I guess you could use a can of beans or some shit.

6.) Sautee until brown on all sides THIS PICTURE DOES NOT WANT TO POST, IMAGINE A PAN WITH CHICKEN IN IT 7.) Add your puree back in with half a can of diced tomatos and 1/4 cup chicken broth

8.) Add your spices: a few shakes of chili powder, a few shakes of tumeric, a teaspoon of garam masala and a teaspoon of cumin. Spices are super cheap if you can get them in bulk at a food co-op, or get huge bags at an oriental mart

9.) Simmer until meat is cooked through: cut a thick piece in half to check. If you’re low on liquid put a lid on it.

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10.) Serve with cock sauce and rice for maximum nom. Eat it with a fork, it is not Chinese or Japanese, do not eat it with chopsticks you fucking weeaboo. Makes two bowls. THERE we go. That is the …nished product.

And you can do this with your leftovers if you have them, and just zap it next time you’re hungry.

Russian Tea Cakes Cost: No clue, but it shouldn’t really be all that much. 1 cup softened butter 1/2 cup confectioners sugar 1/4 teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon vanilla 2 1/4 cups ‡our 3/4 cups …nely chopped nuts Mix the butter, sugar, salt, vanilla, and ‡our thoroughly, then mix in the chopped nuts. Wrap dough in wax paper and chill. Afterward, preheat the oven 28

to 400 degrees. Roll the dough into approx. one inch thick balls and place on ungreased cookie sheets. Bake for 10 to 12 minutes until set but NOT brown. While warm, roll in confectioners sugar. Makes about 4 dozen. Found this recipe in an ancient cookbook that my mother left behind when she moved out. Not sure if they really do work, but they sound delicious, and I de…nitely want to make these bad boys in the coming weeks.

Bread I’ve got a cheap (and easy) recipe that I got from one of my more recent issues of Backwoodsman Magazine. Cost: lol idk Ingredients: 6 cups ‡our 3 cups room temperature water 1 teaspoon yeast 2 teaspoons salt Mix the yeast in the water, then mix the salt in the ‡our, then mix it all together. Cover and let sit for 12-24 hours. After waiting, grease a large baking dish (ceramic or glass are preferred according to the article, I have not tried metal), and move the dough into it. This may be di¢ cult, as the dough is very sticky. Cover and let rise for one hour. Bake at 375 degrees (Fahrenheit) for 45 minutes. DO NOT OVER-BAKE. You will end up with something similar to Dwarf bread if you do. (I know this from personal experience.)

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