You Can Handle This Divorce

! ! ! ! ! !

You!Can!Handle!This!Divorce!! ! ! !!! 10!Powerful!Secrets!! to!Coping!with!Divorce! ! ! ! !

By! Shelley!Stile! Divorce!Recovery!Life!Coach! www.changecoachshelley.com!

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

! You!Can!Handle!This!Divorce!!!! 10!Powerful!Secrets!to!Coping!with!Divorce! ! !

% % % % % % %

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4.!Set!Boundaries!

! Q#%&'#%9#*.5#9%7/%0"&+%0#%$&/%5(%+(:%%%M&/%*('%#3&)41#%/(,%&'#%(5%+"#%4"(5#% 0.+"%/(,'%#3%&59%"#%('%$"#%7#-.5$%+(%2#'7&11/%&7,$#%/(,:%%>(%/(,%$+&/%&59% 1.$+#5%('%9(%/(,%$#+%&%7(,59&'/%+(%4'(+#6+%/(,'$#1*C%%^(0%&7(,+%,$.5-%&%1.++1#% N&21(2.&5%6(59.+.(5.5-C%%K#)#)7#'%+"#%K,$$.&5%$6.#5+.$+%0"(%+'&.5#9%9(-$% +"'(,-"%+"#%,$#%(*%#1#6+'(F$"(6=%+"#'&4/C%H(0%8%&)%5(+%$,--#$+.5-%/(,%,$#%&% 6&++1#%4'(9%b&1+"(,-"%8?11%7#+%/(,%&'#%+".5=.5-%+"&+%.$%&5%#5+.6.5-%.9#&c%7,+%8% &)%$,--#$+.5-%+"&+%/(,%$#+%7(,59&'.#$%&59%#5*('6#%+"#)%6(5$.$+#5+1/:%%%%% % d8%0&5+%/(,%+(%=5(0%+"&+%8%0.11%5(+%&66#4+%2#'7&1%&7,$#%*'()%/(,%&59%.5%+"#% *,+,'#%0"#5%/(,%-(%+"#'#<%8%&)%$.)41/%-#++.5-%(**%+"#%4"(5#:e%J59%7&6=%.+%,4% 0.+"%&6+.(5:%['%"(0%&7(,+%5(+%#2#5%&11(0.5-%4"(5#%6(52#'$&+.(5$%4#'.(9C%%d8*% /(,%0&5+%+(%6()),5.6&+#%0.+"%)#<%41#&$#%9(%.+%+"'(,-"%#F)&.1e<%&59%(56#% &-&.5%.*%/(,%-#+%&7,$.2#%2#'7.&-#%2.&%&5%#F)&.1<%$#+%&%5#0%7(,59&'/:% % B.).+%#34($,'#%+(%/(,'%"()#%7/%/(,'%#3%('%$+(4%.+%6()41#+#1/:%%>(%0"&+%/(,% 5##9%+(%9(%+(%6'#&+#%&%$&*#%&59%$#6,'#%#52.'(5)#5+%*('%/(,'$#1*:%L(,'%"()#%.$% 5(0%/(,'%"()#%&59%+"&+%)#&5$%/(,'%#3%6&5%5(%1(5-#'%6()#%&59%-(%&$%.*% +".5-$%0#'#%+"#%0&/%+"#/%0#'#:%!"#/%&'#5?+:%L(,%&'#%5(%1(5-#'%)&''.#9:% %

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

! 5.!Watch!Out!for!Interpretations!

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f*##1?%1.=#%&%*&.1,'#%7,+%8?11%7#+%+"&+%.+?$%(51/%&%*##1.5-%&59%5(+%&%*&6+:%% M+&'+%$#4&'&+.5-%0"&+%.$%&5%,5&'-,&71#%*&6+%*'()%+"#%)#&5.5-$%/(,%"&2#% 6'#&+#9%&7(,+%/(,'$#1*:%Z3&).5#%/(,'%9.2('6#:%%8$%/(,'%f9.2('6#%$+('/?%*&6+,&1C%% J'#%+"#'#%#1#)#5+$%(*%/(,'%9.2('6#%$+('/%+"&+%&'#%U,$+%)#&5.5-$%+"&+%/(,'% 0(,59#9%#-(%"&$%6'#&+#9C%%^(0%9(%+"($#%)#&5.5-$%)&=#%/(,%*##1C%%N'(7&71/% +#''.71#<%'.-"+C% % !'/%1((=.5-%7&6=%(2#'%/(,'%)&''.&-#%&59%$+&'+%+(%9.**#'#5+.&+#%7#+0##5%+"#% 6(19<%"&'9%*&6+$%&59%/(,'%4#'$(5&1%.5+#'4'#+&+.(5$:%%K#)#)7#'<%0"#5%0#%&'#% .5%4&.5%0#%*.1+#'%#2#'/+".5-%+"'(,-"%+"&+%4#'$4#6+.2#:%%L(,'%*.1+#'%9.6+&+#$%+"#% )#&5.5-$%/(,%&++&6"%+(%+"#%#2#5+$%(*%/(,'%9.2('6#:% % Q'.+#%(,+%/(,'%9.2('6#%$+('/%.5%&11%.+$%-('/%9#+&.1%&59%"(19%5(+".5-%7&6=<% '#&11/%1#+%1(($#:%%!"#5%-(%7&6=%&59%.9#5+.*/%+"#%*&6+$<%+".5-$%+"&+%6&55(+%7#% &'-,#9%(+"#'0.$#:%%I/%",$7&59%1#*+%)#<%*&6+:%%8+%),$+%7#%7#6&,$#%"#%5#2#'% 1(2#9%)#:%85+#'4'#+&+.(5:%%D(+%.+C%%[56#%/(,%+&=#%&%1((=%&+%"(0%),6"%(*%+"#% 4&.5%/(,%&'#%#34#'.#56.5-%.$%9,#%+(%+".5-$%+"&+%&'#%5(+%5#6#$$&'.1/%+"#%+',+"<% /(,%0.11%5(+%(51/%7#%&)&;#9%7,+%0.11%&1$(%7#-.5%+(%$##%+"&+%/(,%6&5%1#+%-(% ),6"%#&$.#':%B#++.5-%-(%1#&9$%+(%)(2.5-%(5:% % H(+%(51/%+"&+<%/(,%6&5%7#-.5%+(%6"(($#%)#&5.5-$%+"&+%0.11%#)4(0#'%/(,:%%8*% /(,%&'#%-(.5-%+(%.5+#'4'#+%+".5-$<%.5+#'4'#+%+"#)%.5%$,6"%&%0&/%+"&+% #)4(0#'$%/(,P%%8*%/(,%&'#%-#++.5-%9.2('6#9<%9(5?+%)&=#%.+%)#&5%/(,%&'#%&% *&.1,'#:%Q"&+%(+"#'%.5+#'4'#+&+.(5%6(,19%/(,%6"(($#%+"&+%#)4(0#'$%/(,C%% N#'"&4$%+"&+%+".$%0&$%)#&5+%+(%7#C%%N#'"&4$%+"&+%.+%0&$%5(+%/(,%7,+%7(+"%(*% /(,%0"(%0#'#%+"#%6(F6'#&+('$%(*%/(,'%'#1&+.(5$".4%+"&+%1#9%+(%+"#%#59.5-%(*% /(,'%)&''.&-#C%%%N#'"&4$%+"&+%/(,%9.9%+"#%7#$+%/(,%6(,19%-.2#5%+"#%'#$(,'6#$% &+%"&59%&+%+"#%+.)#C%%N#'"&4$%+"&+%+"#'#%.$%&%0('19%(*%4($$.7.1.+/%.5%*'(5+%(*% /(,%5(0%+"&+%9.95?+%#3.$+%7#*('#% % % %

!

! 6.!Drop!Unenforceable!Expectations%

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

% %

7.!Give!up!Being!a!Victim!

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f0"&+%0&$?%&$%0#11%&$%f0"&+%.$%f5(0:% % % % % % %

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

% %

8.!Go!with!your!Life’s!New!Direction!

! L(,%*&6#%&%'.2#'%+"&+%.$%',55.5-%$0.*+1/%9(05$+'#&):%%>(%/(,%$0.)%&-&.5$+%+"#% 6,''#5+%('%-(%0.+"%+"#%9.'#6+.(5%(*%+"#%'.2#'?$%*1(0C%%8+%.$%+"#%$&)#%0.+"%/(,'% 1.*#%'.-"+%5(0:%%K#$.$+.5-%'#&1.+/%&59%1.2.5-%.5%f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

% % 8%)#5+.(5#9%6"(.6#%#&'1.#'%(5%&59%+"&+%.$%&%4(0#'*,1%=#/%+(%9.2('6#%'#6(2#'/:% L(,%&'#%&%",)&5%7#.5-%71#$$#9%0.+"%+"#%-.*+$%(*%*'##%0.11<%8:Z:%6"(.6#:%%L(,%-#+% +(%6"(($#:%8*%/(,%6"(($#%+(%'#$.$+%/(,%0.11%'#&4%+"#%'#$,1+$%(*%+"&+%6"(.6#G% $+&/.5-%$+,6=%.5%+"#%4&.5%(*%/(,'%4&$+%&59%,5&71#%+(%7#%*'##%+(%)(2#%(5%0.+"% /(,'%1.*#:%%8*%/(,%6"(($#%+(%1#+%-(%(*%+"#%4&$+%+"&+%.$%9#&9%&59%-(%0.+"%/(,'%1.*#?$% *1(0<%/(,%0.11%'#&4%+"#%7#5#*.+$%(*%+"&+%6"(.6#G%+',#%*'##9()%+(%1#+%-(%(*% &5/+".5-%+"&+%.$%71(6=.5-%/(,'%0&/%+(%&%5#0%&59%2.7'&5+%1.*#%&*+#'%9.2('6#:%% L(,'%6"(.6#$%0.11%9#*.5#%/(,'%1.*#:% % 8%7#1.#2#%0#%'#$.$+%(,'%5#0%'#&1.+/%7#6&,$#%(*%(,'%*#&'%(*%+"#%,5=5(05:%%!"#% *,+,'#%.$%$6&'/%&59%,56#'+&.5:%%8+%.$%+"&+%,56#'+&.5+/V%+"#%4'($4#6+%(*%5(+% =5(0.5-%0"&+%0.11%7#%+"&+%$6&'#$%,$%&59%=##4$%,$%-'(,59#9%.5%+"#%4&$+%&59%.5% '#$.$+&56#:%%!"#%+',+"%.$%+"&+%5(%(5#%6&5%4'#9.6+%+"#%*,+,'#:%%!"#%*,+,'#%.$% &10&/$%,5=5(05:%Q#%6&5%#.+"#'%*#&'%.+%('%"&2#%*&.+"%+"&+%#2#'/+".5-%0.11%0('=% (,+%.5%(,'%7#$+%.5+#'#$+:%%Q"&+%.*%(,'%1.*#%.$%,5*(19.5-%U,$+%&$%.+%.$%)#&5+%+(C%% Q"&+%.*%#2#'/+".5-%"&44#5$%*('%&%-((9%'#&$(5C%%Q"&+%.*%+".$%.$%+"#%+"'#$"(19% +(%$()#+".5-%7.--#'%&59%7#++#'%+"&5%7#*('#C% % J-&.5%.+%6()#$%9(05%+(%6"(.6#:%%L(,%6&5%6"(($#%+(%1.2#%.5%*#&'%(*%+"#%*,+,'#<% 0".6"%$##)$%$.11/%+(%)#%-.2#5%+"#%*&6+%+"&+%/(,%9(5?+%#2#5%=5(0%0"&+%/(,'% *,+,'#%).-"+%"(19:%%L(,%6&5%&1$(%6"(($#%+(%&66#4+%0"&+%.$%&59%"&2#%&%7#1.#*% +"&+%/(,'%1.*#%.$%,5*(19.5-%U,$+%&$%.+%$"(,19%&59%"(19$%-'#&+%4($$.7.1.+.#$%*('% /(,:%%L(,%9#6.9#:% !

! 9.!Change!Your!Attitude!

! L(,'%&++.+,9#%5(+%(51/%6"&5-#$%+"#%0&/%/(,%1((=%&+%1.*#%7,+%.+%&6+,&11/%6"&5-#$% 1.*#%.+$#1*:%%8*%/(,%&'#%1((=.5-%&+%1.*#%+"'(,-"%&%5#-&+.2#%*.1+#'%&59%#2#'/+".5-% 1((=$%0'(5-<%+"#5%6"&56#$%&'#%2#'/%-((9%+"&+%#2#'/+".5-%0.11%7#%0'(5-:%%8*% /(,%1((=%&+%1.*#%+"'(,-"%&%4($.+.2#%*.1+#'<%+"#5%4($$.7.1.+.#$%0.11%&44#&'%.5%/(,'% 1.*#%&11%+"#%+.)#:%%8+%)&/%$(,59%N(11/&55&.$"%7,+%.+%.$%+',#:% %

L(,%&'#%"&2.5-%&%7&9%9&/%&+%0('=%&59%/(,%0&1=%(,+%(*%+"#%(**.6#%.5%&5%,-1/% )((9:%%L(,%-#+%.5%/(,'%6&'%&59%/(,'%7&9%)((9%(51/%)&=#$%+"#%+'&**.6%#2#5% )('#%*',$+'&+.5-<%0".6"%6&,$#$%/(,'%)((9%+(%$4.'&1%9(050&'9:%H(0%/(,%&'#% '#&11/%4.$$#9:%L(,%0&1=%.5+(%+"#%"(,$#%&59%+"#%=.9$%&'#%0&+6".5-%!g%&59% -.2#5%"(0%/(,%&'#%*##1.5-<%+"&+%$#+$%(**%/#+%&5(+"#'%#)(+.(5&1%+'.--#':%%L(,% 1($#%.+:%L(,'%&++.+,9#%('%4#'$4#6+.2#%.$%1.=#%&%),+&5+%2.',$%+"&+%&**#6+$% #2#'/+".5-:%%% %

8+%.$%+"#%$&)#%0.+"%/(,'%4#'$4#6+.2#%(5%/(,'%1.*#%9,'.5-%('%&*+#'%9.2('6#%.*%/(,% &'#%&5-'/<%7.++#'%&59%*#&'*,1%+"&+%7#6()#$%/(,'%4'#2&1#5+%4#'$4#6+.2#%(5%1.*#<% 0".6"%.5%+,'5%6(1('$%#2#'/%$.5-1#%&'#&%(*%/(,'%7#.5-:%% %

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

!

10.!Choose!Wisely!

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

%

% % In!Closing….! K#&9%&59%'#F'#&9%+"#$#%`a%M#6'#+$%+(%_(4.5-%0.+"%L(,'%>.2('6#%&59%+,'5% +"#)%.5+(%"&7.+$:%8+%+&=#$%&7(,+%ha%9&/$%+(%6"&5-#%(,'%"&7.+$%0.+"%6(56#'+#9% #**('+%$(%4'&6+.6#<%4'&6+.6#<%&59%4'&6+.6#:% %% H(+%(51/%0.11%+"#$#%+#5%&'#&$%"#14%/(,%6(4#%0.+"%+"#%+'&,)&%(*%9.2('6#<%+"#/% 0.11%&1$(%41&6#%/(,%(5%+"#%'(&9%+(%1#++.5-%-(%&59%)(2.5-%(5%&*+#'%/(,'%9.2('6#:% Q"&+%/(,%4,+%.5%.$%0"&+%/(,%0.11%-#+%(,+:%%8%4'().$#%/(,%+"&+%/(,%0.11%*##1% 7#++#'%&59%7#%&71#%+(%"&591#%+"#%#2#5+$%(*%/(,'%1.*#%),6"%)('#%#**#6+.2#1/%.*% /(,%+&=#%&11%+"#$#%$,--#$+.(5$%+(%"#&'+%&59%$#+%+"#)%.5%&6+.(5:% % 8%.52.+#%/(,%+(%2.$.+%)#%&+%000:6"&5-#6(&6"$"#11#/:6()%*('%&99.+.(5&1% .5*(')&+.(5%&59%'#$(,'6#$%(5%>.2('6#%K#6(2#'/%&59%B.*#%&*+#'%>.2('6#:% % % M"#11#/% ! % ! ! ! ! ! !