Verbs
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- Words: 689
- Pages: 6
3/16/2005
Voice and Tense: Making Verbs Work
Celia M. Elliott University of Illinois [email protected]
Copyright © 2004 The Board of Trustees of the University of Illinois
Use “strong” verbs Verbs provide the momentum of writing Proper verb choice is often the difference between crisp, clear writing and bloated, clumsy writing I always write in the passive voice.
2
1
3/16/2005
Science writing has traditionally employed the “passive voice,” but that convention is changing Active voice uses direct action verbs Passive voice uses “to be” verb forms Active voice is more direct Passive voice emphasizes what was found, not who did the finding Passive voice can be pedantic and wordy in the hands of amateurs 3
The choice of active or passive voice is largely a matter of what you want to emphasize “We used an SEM to examine the surface defects of the MoGe thin films.” (AV) “We examined the surface defects of the MoGe thin films using an SEM.” (AV) “An SEM was used to examine the surface defects of the MoGe thin films.” (PV) “Surface defects of the MoGe thin films were examined with an SEM.” (PV)
Rather than worrying about voice, use strong verbs instead of weak verb phrases 4
2
3/16/2005
Replace wimpy verb phrases with strong action verbs Weak verb phrases
made a determination performed a measurement carried out the analysis
Strong verbs determined measured analyzed
The human immune system is responsible not only for the identification of foreign molecules, but also for actions leading to their immobilization, neutralization, and destruction. (25 words) The human immune system not only identifies foreign molecules, but also immobilizes, neutralizes, and destroys them. (16 words) 5
Change nouns ending in -tion, -ment, and –ance back into verbs The results gave no indication of the presence of PCB contamination in the oil pump. The results indicated that the oil pump was not contaminated by PCBs. Measurements were taken of variations in pressure as function of temperature. Pressure was measured as it varied with temperature.
6
3
3/16/2005
Use “is” verbs judiciously Weak verb phrases is beginning is used to detect
Strong verbs begins detects
Use is in sentences that define or equate
“A positron is a positively charged electron produced in the beta decay of neutron-deficient nuclides.”
Use a strong verb in sentences that do not present a definition or equality
“Generally, a storage ring is used not only to store charged particles, but also to define their energy and trajectory.” (20 words) “Generally, a storage ring not only stores charged particles, but also defines their energy and trajectory.” (16 words, more direct) 7
Tenses
*
*maintain witless consistency 8
4
3/16/2005
Don’t jump back and forth between present and past tense
Horrible example:
“A single beam of light was directed obliquely into a waveguide formed by two parallel, movable mirrors. The beam experienced multiple reflections from the mirrors and propagates as a combination of many modes. Each mode interferes with every other mode, which led to a modulation transmitted through the waveguide. The number of reflections within the multimode waveguide interferometer determines the device’s sensitivity.”
The last detail (determines) should be in the present tense, because it is a timeindependent fact; everything else should 9 be past tense
Avoid unruly verb forms as well as tense flips A solution including DNA is dropped on the sample. The liquid dries, and with any luck, some of the DNA has landed across the trench, creating a perfect nanoscale bridge. A solution containing DNA is dropped onto the sample. With any luck, some of the DNA strands land across the trench, and as the liquid evaporates, a perfect nanoscale “bridge” remains. 10
5
3/16/2005
Use parallel construction throughout Verb forms
“Further possible experiments include stopping an antiproton in a Cerenkov detector and the observation of antiproton annihilation in a cloud chamber.” “Further experiments could include stopping an antiproton in a Cerenkov detector and observing antiproton annihilation in a cloud chamber.”
In lists
“The process involves three main steps: cooling, pulverization, and screening.” The process involves three main steps: cooling, pulverizing, and screening.” Celia M. Elliot • Physics • [email protected]
11
6
Voice and Tense: Making Verbs Work
Celia M. Elliott University of Illinois [email protected]
Copyright © 2004 The Board of Trustees of the University of Illinois
Use “strong” verbs Verbs provide the momentum of writing Proper verb choice is often the difference between crisp, clear writing and bloated, clumsy writing I always write in the passive voice.
2
1
3/16/2005
Science writing has traditionally employed the “passive voice,” but that convention is changing Active voice uses direct action verbs Passive voice uses “to be” verb forms Active voice is more direct Passive voice emphasizes what was found, not who did the finding Passive voice can be pedantic and wordy in the hands of amateurs 3
The choice of active or passive voice is largely a matter of what you want to emphasize “We used an SEM to examine the surface defects of the MoGe thin films.” (AV) “We examined the surface defects of the MoGe thin films using an SEM.” (AV) “An SEM was used to examine the surface defects of the MoGe thin films.” (PV) “Surface defects of the MoGe thin films were examined with an SEM.” (PV)
Rather than worrying about voice, use strong verbs instead of weak verb phrases 4
2
3/16/2005
Replace wimpy verb phrases with strong action verbs Weak verb phrases
made a determination performed a measurement carried out the analysis
Strong verbs determined measured analyzed
The human immune system is responsible not only for the identification of foreign molecules, but also for actions leading to their immobilization, neutralization, and destruction. (25 words) The human immune system not only identifies foreign molecules, but also immobilizes, neutralizes, and destroys them. (16 words) 5
Change nouns ending in -tion, -ment, and –ance back into verbs The results gave no indication of the presence of PCB contamination in the oil pump. The results indicated that the oil pump was not contaminated by PCBs. Measurements were taken of variations in pressure as function of temperature. Pressure was measured as it varied with temperature.
6
3
3/16/2005
Use “is” verbs judiciously Weak verb phrases is beginning is used to detect
Strong verbs begins detects
Use is in sentences that define or equate
“A positron is a positively charged electron produced in the beta decay of neutron-deficient nuclides.”
Use a strong verb in sentences that do not present a definition or equality
“Generally, a storage ring is used not only to store charged particles, but also to define their energy and trajectory.” (20 words) “Generally, a storage ring not only stores charged particles, but also defines their energy and trajectory.” (16 words, more direct) 7
Tenses
*
*maintain witless consistency 8
4
3/16/2005
Don’t jump back and forth between present and past tense
Horrible example:
“A single beam of light was directed obliquely into a waveguide formed by two parallel, movable mirrors. The beam experienced multiple reflections from the mirrors and propagates as a combination of many modes. Each mode interferes with every other mode, which led to a modulation transmitted through the waveguide. The number of reflections within the multimode waveguide interferometer determines the device’s sensitivity.”
The last detail (determines) should be in the present tense, because it is a timeindependent fact; everything else should 9 be past tense
Avoid unruly verb forms as well as tense flips A solution including DNA is dropped on the sample. The liquid dries, and with any luck, some of the DNA has landed across the trench, creating a perfect nanoscale bridge. A solution containing DNA is dropped onto the sample. With any luck, some of the DNA strands land across the trench, and as the liquid evaporates, a perfect nanoscale “bridge” remains. 10
5
3/16/2005
Use parallel construction throughout Verb forms
“Further possible experiments include stopping an antiproton in a Cerenkov detector and the observation of antiproton annihilation in a cloud chamber.” “Further experiments could include stopping an antiproton in a Cerenkov detector and observing antiproton annihilation in a cloud chamber.”
In lists
“The process involves three main steps: cooling, pulverization, and screening.” The process involves three main steps: cooling, pulverizing, and screening.” Celia M. Elliot • Physics • [email protected]
11
6
