The Stony Brook Press - Volume 30, Issue 2

2

Vol. XXX, Issue 2 | Wednesday, October 1, 2008

news

Even The Main Stacks Need Paper Stacks By Sarah Asselta

As the world’s information becomes digitalized, libraries are struggling to make purchasing decisions between new and old mediums. Stony Brook’s Melville Library has been operating on a shrinking print book allowance, as the shuffling of money through a stagnant budget has given priority to subscripelectronic resources. tion-based It is partly due to Stony Brook’s emphasis on the sciences, which depends heavily on pricey, searchable journals rather than monographs, or scholarly print texts. “Our journal collection is heavily digital already,” says Nathan Baum, Assistant Director of Electronic Resources. “There is this conception that these things are free, because it’s on the web and the web is free,” he says. “But we pay a lot of money for these resources.” Electronic databases, such as ScienceDirect, JSTOR and LexisNexis, tend to lock in purchases with a threeto-five year contract, eliminating the ability to negotiate subscriptions with respect to budget variances from year to year. In addition, a relatively unchanged library budget in the past decade actually depletes the spending allowance due to inflation. Inflation reduces the purchasing power of print books according to the consumer price index, typically two-to-four percent annually. And the inflation rate for journals is actually much higher, 10% each year. The Library’s material budget for the 2007-2008 school year was $6,988,988. Five years prior, during the 2001-2002 year, it was working with $6,776,222, and five years before that, the working budget was $5,358,522. As the library becomes increasingly locked into set electronic subscription costs, coupled with inflation rates, the remaining allowance reserved for purchasing print resources has been shrinking every year. Some librarians say that this creates gaps in the print collection, as some newer editions cannot afford to be purchased.“Students assume that an accredited research institution is supplying them with an adequate collection of print books,” says Richard Feinberg, Head Preservation Librarian. “A sufficient collection would allow a student to go to the stacks, browse the shelves, and stumble across material they never expected to, enriching their research.” The tight budget is shaping the li-

Laura Paesano

brary’s format collection. Publishers typically sell resources in packages; an electronic edition, a print edition, and other possible accessories such as CD’s and DVD’s. Electronic editions get priority, says the library administration. It becomes easier to handle, archive, search and print. When asked whether this is better for the library system, Chris Filstrup, Dean of the Libraries, says that this is the future. “Our job is to give people information whatever the format is, whether it’s using LexisNexis or digging through the Stacks.” Balancing between print and elec-

tronic resources has been a complicated issue for years, says Aimee DeChambeau, e-Resources Librarian. But as ejournals, e-books and online databases rapidly expand, book shelves could get lonely. “It’s not a temporary shift,” she says, “It’s here to stay.” Subject specialists advise the library administration in purchases, making the acquired list a collaborative effort between faculty, academics, librarians and a Library Senate Committee that ensures the money is used efficiently. Close collaboration with other state schools allow for no more than two

Caitlin Ferrell

SUNY schools to purchase the same monograph. Interlibrary loans enable the sharing within the system, cutting back unnecessary spending. “When you don’t have much money, you are very particular,” says Filstrup. With such a small print book budget, priority of purchases is going only to support the courses and the curriculum. If a professor will be teaching the material, the library acquires it. Susan Lieberthal, the Business and Interlibrary Loan librarian, says the people that are suffering the most due to the stagnant monograph collection are the researchers in the Humanities, who rely heavily on dated, often obscure material. “If you’re studying in the history department, and your thesis is on ‘women’s novels in 18th century America,’ you’re going to need a lot of books,” says Lieberthal. Libraries are strange animals. “The provost views us as black holes, because we require so much money but don’t generate any revenue,” says Lieberthal. However, an extensive research library tends to mirror the credentials of an academic institute. This is where a library’s priorities may be shifting. In the past, a library’s collection value was often measured by hefty card catalogs. Nowadays, a quality resource collection may be redefining itself in light of diverging formats, as long as funds grow to compensate for the increasing costs and conveniences of all things digital. The next step for the library is the accumulation of WorldCat, a nonprofit, member-regulated network of 50 million library records and growing. It allows students to locate books nationwide, send out an interlibrary request, and receive it within two-to-four days. “I’m not saying it’s the same thing as going to the stacks and browsing, I understand that,” says Filstrup, “These days of huge print collections—browsing and serendipity—they’re gone.” As for the budget dilemma, library administrators remain somewhere between optimistic and realistic. “There are a lot of things that I wish we could buy, but you have to live within the budget situation.” The library received a modest victory this year, receiving a $100,000 increase in “tech fees,” growing the printed book budget from $300,000 from last year to $400,000 this year. “The budget will always be an issue,” says Filstrup. “I think we’re managing our money well.”

3

The Stony Brook Press

SSK’s Final Convocation:

Recounting of Past Accomplishments Does Little to Assuage Fears of Budget Crises By Najib Aminy

In her final convocation as President, Shirley Strum Kenny addressed a packed audience of Stony Brook faculty and students alike, highlighting moments of her fourteen-year term. Emphasizing the importance of Stony Brook University to New York State, President Kenny dedicated a significant amount of her speech lamenting the budget cuts threatening both Stony Brook and the SUNY budget. Stony Brook has already sustained a $7.4 million loss as part of the $50 million cut from the SUNY budget and is anticipating another $5.5 million cut. Kenny said the problem that Stony Brook and other SUNY and CUNY Universities face is not a “temporary discomfort,” but a need to state the importance of such institutions. “They are not mere social gestures; they are not safety nets; they are economic and social bedrock. They are our hope for the future, our guarantee against losing our primacy as a State,” said the 73-year-old Texas native. Kenny went over the progression and evolution of Stony Brook University to emphasize the importance of why funding is so important. Citing an economic study on the Long Island economy, Kenny called Stony Brook University the economic engine of Long Island. With $1.8 billion invested into

Everyone was all smiles at the after-party.

the budget, Stony Brook is responsible for a return of $4.7 billion in the economic activity of Long Island. “And besides that, we are educating the next generation of scientists and business leaders,” added Kenny. In terms of academia, Kenny boasted statistics of an increasing freshman class alongside a positive correlation of increased SAT scores. Along side the growing freshman class, Stony Brook’s number of applicants has doubled since Kenny’s inception as President in 1994; jumping up 103%, making Stony Brook the SUNY school with the highest number of applicants. “Only 37 four-year institutions in the country had more applications than Stony Brook; we had more applications than Stanford, Harvard, or Yale among others,” said Kenny. The most important event, as Kenny described in her fourteen years, was Stony Brook’s admittance to the Association of American Universities in 2001, a prestigious organization formed in 1900 to “declare the equality of top American universities with those in Europe and to work together to ensure high quality in U.S. graduate degrees,” according to its mission statement. Stony Brook joins the likes of Harvard, Princeton, MIT in addition to the only one other SUNY school, the University of Buffalo. “For 44 years our aspiration had been election to this association of the the top research universities, public and private, in North America.” Since its

Najib Aminy

Shirley prepares to “let us down gently” so to speak.

inception alongside Texas A&M in 2001, no other university has been admitted. In touching upon the many University projects she had worked on, such as the remodeling of the Javits Lecture Hall, the deconstruction of the Bridge

“...students could wind up paying an increased tuition for the same, if not reduced services...” to Nowhere, the renovation of the Academic Mall, and the building up of a Division-I athletic program, President Kenny mentioned how student tuition at Stony Brook has increased only once in the past thirteen years, the last of which was in 2003. Throughout that time, the undergraduate student population increased 40% from 17,200 to 24,000. With the increase of students came the increase of faculty and staff which rose 24% in the same period, ultimately from 11,200 to 13,900 paid professionals. “Clearly we need funding appropriate to our research mission— more money per student, not less,” said Kenny. With the strong possibility of a net $13 million cut in the Stony Brook budget, changes will inevitably occur to make up for the loss of money. Tuition

Andrew Fraley

is speculated to increase sharply after the November election. In talks of the cuts, Kenny said, “if our present dire situation is a temporary—one year—problem, we can handle it, though unquestionably with discomfort, by redirecting some of our funding intended for equipment services.” However, if the budget dilemma prolongs into the coming years, “we have a very different situation,” said Kenny. Believing in keeping tuition as low as possible for students, Kenny is, as she said, “angry when students end up getting large tuition increases when the State decreases support for the university.” What stifles Kenny more is the fact that students could wind up paying an increased tuition for the same, if not reduced services that is currently provided, due to the budget cuts. In closing her final State of the University address, President Kenny said the educational institutions of America, especially in New York, are facing troubling challenges and added that financial support of public higher education must be stressed to every local politician. “What we do here is vitally important. Those we teach here are the nation’s hope for tomorrow. The research we do is key to health and prosperity in the future. But we must have the funding necessary to achieve our mission,” said Kenny closing off her speech to a thunderous applause and standing ovation.

4

Editorial Board Executive Editor James Laudano Tall n blond w da legzz Emma Kobolakis Associate Editor Najib Aminy Business Manager Katie Knowlton Production Manager Inquire Within News Editors Laura Cooper Jake Conarck Features Editor Alex Nagler Arts Editor Andrew Fraley Photo Editors Tia Mansouri Roman Sheydvasser Copy Editors Cindy Liu Chris Mellides Kelly Yu Webmaster Chris Williams Audiomaster Inquire Within Ombudsman Jowy Romano

Minister of Archives Jesse Schopefer Layout Design by Jowy Romano

Staff

Kotei Aoki Habib Aminy Ross Barkan Raina Bedford Matt Braunstein Tony Cai Canteloupe J.C. Chan Doug Cion Caroline D’Agati Joe Donato Nick Eaton Michael Felder Vincent Michael Festa Joe Filippazzo Amelia Fischer Jamie Freiermuth Ilyssa Fuchs Rob Gilheany David Knockout Ginn Joanna Goodman Stephanie Hayes Marta Gyvel Mo Ibrahim Andrew Jacob Elizabeth Kaplan Alexander Kahn Olga Kaplun Jack Katsman Liz Kaufman

Rebecca Kleinhaut Iris Lin Frank Loiaccono Mariana Martins Justin Meltzer Leeza Menon Chris Mellides James Messina Steve McLinden Chris Oliveri Ben van Overmeire Grace Pak Rob Pearsall Andrew Pernick Jon Pu Aamer Qureshi Nirmala Ramsaran Kristine Renigen Berta Rezik Dave Robin Joe Safdia Natalie Schultz Scott Silsbe Rose Slupski Amberly Timperio Lena Tumasyan Marcel Votlucka Alex Walsh Brian Wasser Matt Willemain

The Stony Brook Press is published fortnightly during the academic year and twice during summer session by The Stony Brook Press, a student run non-profit organization funded by the Student Activity Fee. The opinions expressed in letters, articles and viewpoints do not necessarily reflect those of The Stony Brook Press as a whole. Advertising policy does not necessarily reflect editorial policy. For more information on advertising and deadlines call (631)632-6451. Staff meetings are held Wednesdays at 1:00 pm. First copy free. Additional copies cost 50 cents and your integrity. For additional copies contact the Business Manager. The Stony Brook Press Suites 060 & 061 Student Union SUNY at Stony Brook Stony Brook, NY 11794-3200 (631) 632-6451 Voice (631) 632-4137 Fax Email: [email protected]

editorials

Vol. XXX, Issue 2 | Wednesday, October 1, 2008

MASKED MENACES TERRORIZE CAMPUS! Misguided Vigilante “Justice.” A Security Threat: Stony Brook is more than just a school. For many, it is also a home. And every American has a God-given right to be safe in his own home. That right is in danger as we speak, dear readers! The vile blight of crime has descended upon our beloved campus. Masked bandits who dare not show their faces wander our roads, trails, and multi-colored paths under the cover of darkness! On September 18, at approximately 11:40pm, an innocent civilian was accosted by three hooligans dressed as skeletons while he walked along the pathway between the Computing Center and Circle Road. This upright young man was robbed of his possessions, but the greater loss was what was taken from all of us that night – peace of mind. These costumed cowards hid their

shameful faces behind cheap Halloween masks, achieving total anonymity. They could be anyone – your roommate, your TA, or that unwashed townie you buy your pot from. The chill that has descended upon our population isn’t just the first winds of autumn, it’s the loss of faith in one another, and the shattering of a bond between us all. Who can you trust? I’ll tell you who you can’t trust – the Scarlet Seawolf! That reckless vigilante is every bit as crooked as the Campus Cadaver Crew he claims to be tracking down. If the Scarlet Seawolf is really on our side, why won’t he show us his face? Not only is he hiding something, he’s also setting a dangerous example. In no time, we’ll have all kinds of masks and capes running around, endangering our safety and their own with no accountability. No self-respecting “Stony Brooker” should support any fellow student trying to join

the ranks of these “super heroes,” getting himself bit in the Chemistry tower, or throwing himself at something he’s unsure of on the fifth floor of physics. The Scarlet Seawolf ’s risky brand of vigilante “justice” only detracts from the true heroism of people like my son, US astronaut John Jameson, and Doug Little, that paragon of law enforcement who’s warned us about “the bad guys” for so many years. Make no mistake; the Scarlet Seawolf is no hero. He’s in cahoots with those thieves, and this fine paper will give top billing to any photographer who can prove it. Catch him revealing his true nature, and we’ll put you on the cover! I don’t care if he’s littering or throwing President Kenny under a bus, as long as he’s breaking a law. Get me one incriminating picture of this Scarlet Seawolf! No, make it five. Ten. One hundred! We need photos, dammit!

Hello, and welcome to this issue’s entry in the “SSK Fourteen Years, Fourteen Moments” Countdown! Last issue we opened the coundown with moment number fourteen, e SSK Arts Festival Fiasco of Spring 2008. For this issue’s moment -- number thirteen on the list -- we are going to stay in the Spring 2008 semester and relive the Touro Law School mixup. We promise to go further back in time for our next issue’s entry, so don’t worry. Please enjoy this entry, and without further ado...

The Touro Law Deal Dies Before It Even Begins President Kenny has always a very ambitious president. Included in her list of accomplishments are the expansion of Stony Brook to include a Manhattan campus and the brutal (kind of) acquisition of Southampton College. Her imperialism is never quite sated, however, and last year she made yet another attempt. This time with Touro Law School in Central Islip. As a part of the capital budget, which is a separate budget for new construction and expansion, this ac-

quisition attempt was just one of several bizarre projects seen last year (another was determining the feasibility of building a monorail on campus). However, before any of this was even officially announced, Shirley declared the deal “dead.” Touro was not for sale, even to someone of President Kenny’s gravitas. The whole thing really blew up in her face with extensive coverage in all the local Long Island media outlets. Stony Brook is now left without any plans to built or acquire a law

school anytime in the forseeable future. This year, with the grave budget crisis threatening the basic operations of the school, Shirley has had to put her ambitions on hold. She must focus her now limited capital budget to one capital project. So, as she is wont to declare, she will focus on what is most important: our school’s academics. And she’ll do this by building a new recreational center

The Stony Brook Press

E-mail your letters to [email protected]

5

John Derbyshire Comes To SBU! By Natalie Cronsija

The Patriot, Stony Brook University’s conservative publication, hosted a lecture given by right-wing, Britishborn author and blogger John Derbyshire on September 25 to elucidate the true nature of American Conservatism. His nationality aside, Derbyshire is a “true” American conservative and apart from his proud homophobia and racism, he is “mild and tolerant” in his bigotry. His claim to “see humanity plain” umbrellas his belief that homophobia and racism are “core to humanity” in the tribal/huntergatherer sense of what it is to be human. It is this “plain” view, this primal, “Quest for Fire” mentality that was applied to each issue addressed. The preNeolithic conservatism of keeping all the nuts and berries in one pile without anyone putting their dirty, foreign hands on them is, essentially, the conservative economic policy from the dawn of time, and has since been lost to a world where even cavemen have car insurance. This olde type of conservatism or, paleo-con, is rather infrequent now as the Republican party fluxes between

“cons”—from neo-cons to theo-cons to bio-cons—and now, as The Patriot’s Alaxander Chamessian said, “I don’t know what it exactly means to be conservative.” John Derbyshire’s incarnation of conservatism, the type that apparently lies somewhere between sed-

vatism,” and laid it as a pagan sacrifice to save the country from death. Wall Street is, as the prophets foretold, the new Sodom with sulfur clouds on the way. The government’s big, meaty paws have never left the American purse (rather pocket, ‘cause “purse” might be

What a charming looking chap!

imentary layers of rock, is the first and most American of them all. The economy was the bleed-American soft spot Mr. Derbyshire began to analyze first. The prevailing economic apocalypse echoes of the ancient death of Coolidge conservatism in the 1930’s, when FDR took his big gun, took aim and shot the “last dodo bird of conser-

too gay). Another part of the problem is the illegal immigrant population, which only takes and takes and never gives back (and of whom Mr. Derbyshire was a member from the early 1970s until 2002). America is an “assimilationist” country according to Derbyshire, who cites diversity and the public “cherishing of identity” as the chief force de-

the American social stroying fabric. Thank you, Stony Brook Cultural Associations! You’re breaking America! Derbyshire does believe that most Americans view the Iraq War as a mistake. He learned the hard way that the British, imperialist “blow up the Sultan’s palace” approach does not pan out as well as it did in the days of Lawrence of Arabia, old boy. This basic foreign policy, which “doesn’t take Muslims seriously,” is encouraging a worldview that brushes off Russia as a place that Alaskan Governor Sarah Palin “can see from her house.” “I need to leave…now…” said a student who identified herself as a “gay, hippie liberal” as the lecture ended. She had come to the lecture with two friends who identified themselves as moderate Republicans and expressed concern that The Patriot, would have such an “extremist” speak to students so close to an election of “change.” Of change, Mr. Derbyshire was not supportive, for how can humans change fundamental human nature, or at least resurrect Calvin Coolidge’s petrified corpse to save the day? “Liberals, they pretend [these fundamental prejudices] don’t exist, and I don’t like them.”

6

Vol. XXX, Issue 2 | Wednesday, October 1, 2008

The Amazing SpiderShirl: Richard Nasti and the Scholary Six

By Alex Nagler

For those of you who don’t know, President Kenny is retiring at the end of the year. A committee, headed by alumnus Richard Nasti, has been formed to find her replacement. Last week, elections were held by the faculty to choose six representatives to serve on the committee. When the ballots were counted, the following six professors emerged as the chosen representatives of the faculty body to select the person who, Albany Willing, will be the next President of Stony Brook University. These six professors constitute a wide variety of campus departments. Among their ranks are a Professor of Marine Biogeochemistry, a Nurse Practitioner and Dean of the School of Nursing, Professor and Chair of the Department of Technology and Society in the College of Engineering and Applied Sciences, an English Professor, a History Professor, and a Professor of Medicine, Microbiology, Pathology and Pharmacology. Together, they make up a wide slice of Stony Brook academic life and we wish them well as they embark on their quest to find the next President of Stony Brook University. Our thanks go out to Richard Nasti for agreeing to work with us.

Robert C. Aller

Robert Aller is a Distinguished Professor of Marine Biogeochemistry in the School of Marine and Atmospheric Sciences, with affiliated appointment in the Department of Geosciences at Stony Brook University. He is an expert on biogeochemical cycling processes and animal-sediment interactions in marine deposits, particularly tropical deltaic, coastal, and continental margin environments. He received a B.S. in Biology-Geology and a B.A. in Chemistry, both with Highest Distinction from the University of Rochester in 1972, and a

M.Phil. (1974) and Ph.D.(1977) in Geology and Geophysics from Yale University. He rose to the rank of Professor of Geophysical Sciences at the University of Chicago from 1977 - 1986, and subsequently moved to Stony Brook University with his wife Josephine Aller, who is also on the faculty at SBU. Their youngest daughter, Deborah, is a sophomore at Stony Brook. Prof. Aller is a Fellow of the American Geophysical Union, the European Association of Geochemistry, and the Geochemical Society. He has received honorary doctorates from Göteborg Université, Sweden and the Université de la Méditerranée (Aix-Marseille II), France, and was awarded the Division of Geochemistry Medal in 2007 by the American Chemical Society. He was a soccer and basketball coach in the Three Village community for 10 years, and serves as a director of the Stony Brook Environmental Conservancy.

Ora J. Bouey Ms. Ora James Bouey is a Nurse Practitioner, Professor and Associate Dean, School of Nursing. Professor Bouey has held two major administrative roles and served as coordinator and/or Director of different programs on site and internationally. During her tenure at Stony Brook University, she has had firsthand experience within inter- professional groups and has consistently represented the interests of the students, faculty and staff of the HSC. During the ‘80s, Professor Bouey was the first Chair of the Department of Adult Health Nursing which under her tutelage was developed into the largest department in the School of Nursing. Professor Bouey has presented papers and continues to serve on local state, national, and international committees, advocating for the University at large. In 1980, she received the Chancellor’s Award for Excellence in Teaching. Recently, she received the AFT’s Living the Legacy Award for 2008. This award is presented to women who have: Provided leadership and demonstrated interest in issues of women’s rights; maintained multiple decades of involvement in local, state and national affiliates; acted as mentors, coaches & role models for other women; and been recognized as a leader in her own community. Professor Bouey graduated from Stony Brook University and New York University.

David L. Ferguson

David L. Ferguson is Distinguished Service Professor and Chair of the Department of Technology and Society in the College of Engineering and Applied Sciences at Stony Brook University. Dr. Ferguson has been director or co-director of numerous projects, including eight National Science Foundation projects, aimed at improving undergraduate and graduate education in science, technology, engineering and mathematics (STEM). He is coordinator for the Math and Computer Science cluster of Science Education for New Civic Engagement and Responsibility (SENCER), an NSFfunded National Dissemination grant. Professor Ferguson is Director of the NSF-funded SUNY LSAMP and SUNY AGEP programs—aimed at increasing the participation of underrepresented minority students in STEM. His research includes quantitative modeling, problem solving, educational technologies, and decision making. His awards include the U. S. Presidential Award for Excellence in Science, Mathematics and Engineering Mentoring (PAESMEM), the Archie Lacey Award of the New York Academy of Sciences, and the Engineering Educator Award of the Joint Committee on Engineering of Long Island. Peter J. Manning

Peter Manning graduated from Harvard College and earned his MA and Ph.D in English Language and Literature from Yale University. He taught at the Uni-

versity of California, Berkeley, and the University of Southern California, from both of which he received awards for excellence in teaching, before coming to Stony Brook as Chair of the Department of English in 2000. He is a specialist in literature of the British Romantic period, and has written or edited several books in the field. He has been given the Distinguished Scholarship Award of the Keats-Shelley Association, and held fellowships from the Guggenheim Foundation and the National Endowment for the Humanities.

Gar y J. Marker Dr. Gary Marker has been a member of the Stony Brook faculty, in the Department of History, since 1979. His field of expertise is Russian history, with a special emphasis on the early modern period. He is the author of many works touching upon print culture, gender, religion, education, and political authority. He is a former chair of History, former Graduate Director, and he currently serves on the UUP Executive Committee as academic grievance officer for west campus.

Roy T. Steigbigel Dr Steigbigel is Professor of Medicine, Microbiology, Pathology and Pharmacology at the medical school at Stony Brook. He received his bachelor’s degree from Carleton College and the MD degree from the University of Rochester. His subsequent training was also at Rochester as well as in the U. S. Public Health Service and at Stanford University. After 10 years on the faculty at the University of Rochester he came to Stony Brook in 1983 to found the Division of Infectious Diseases and, shortly thereafter, the AIDS Treatment and Research Center. He has been active in research, (with uninterrupted external funding since arriving at Stony Brook) and in multiple aspects of education, including the development and direction of courses. He serves on numerous national, regional, universitywide and medical school committees. He is now President of the School of Medicine Faculty Senate.

News

The Stony Brook Press

7

Where Have You Gone, NYPIRG? By Jon Singer

$125,000. Articles in past issues of both The Stony Brook Press and The Statesman documented NYPIRG activities over the past year. One event, ‘80s Night, involved students dressing up in whatever Teen Wolf would wear to learn about the history of recycling. The March 13 issue of The Statesman reported a crowd of about forty students at ‘80s Night, which was co-hosted by the Stony Brook Environmental Club. In the wake of ‘80s Night and multiple other campaigns, projects and events, NYPIRG at Stony Brook planned a full program for the 08-09 ac-

Many Stony Brook students never knew what NYPIRG was. But that doesn’t matter anymore, because NYPIRG at Stony Brook no longer exists. For almost thirty years leading up to the current fall semester, The New York Public Interest Research Group had a chapter at Stony Brook, one of twenty-one campus chapters across the state. Founded in 1973, NYPIRG is the consumer, environmental and government reform organization that helped pass the Generic Drug Law, replenish the superfund program, and broaden the Tuition Assistance Program. Of all the organization’s missions, one thing NYPIRG always did was voter registration. Last year, a non-election year, NYPIRG at Stony Brook registered around 1700 voters. This year, with no NYPIRG, voter registration for the November 4 presidential election is primarily the job of partisan groups such as the College Democrats. The Undergraduate Stu- Dark, empty and locked: The scene at the NYPIRG office these days. dent Government has also been registering new voters, but without a non- ademic year, requesting $150,000 from partisan activist group on campus, USG the USG. Like all other clubs, this senator Kevin Brady sees a void that money would have come from the needs to be filled. mandatory $94.25 student activity fee “As a new senator, I’m still answer- that Stony Brook undergraduates pay ing these questions as we go along and each year. asking more detailed versions,” says Andrew Morrison is a NYPIRG reBrady. As the November election is ap- gional supervisor, and has been repreproaching and state budget cuts in the senting NYPIRG in their current quest $13 million range are affecting all as- to get back on the USG budget. “The pects of higher education, the question money that is used to support a for some at Stony Brook is: Where is NYPIRG chapter, every dime of it that’s NYPIRG? used from the Stony Brook student acBrady, who won a senate seat in the tivity fee benefits the students here.” most recent USG election, joined a legThis becomes an issue when islative body whose budget committee NYPIRG, like other clubs including had allocated $0 to NYPIRG in the College Democrats, College Republi2008-2009 USG budget. Next to cans and The Hillel Foundation For NYPIRG, the sidebar of the budget doc- Jewish Life, are local chapters of a ument says “did not spend budget in 07- broader organization. “We were sup08.” porting a national organization and we The 07-08 NYPIRG budget was couldn’t figure out where our money

was going,” said one USG senator, who requested to remain anonymous. To fight for issues of higher education, NYPIRG employs staff members working in Albany. “They’re working full time on behalf of students right up there in the capital, because that’s where the decisions about tuition and financial aid are being made,” says Morrison. “The average student isn’t going to spend fifty hours a week talking to elected officials about higher education.” Morrison says that with NYPIRG, unlike CDs, CRs or Hillel, there is no proper parent organization. “The closest thing to it would be the student

board of directors,” he says. That board, comprised entirely of students and elected by students, hires NYPIRG’s executive directors, passes the organization’s budget and chooses the issues that NYPIRG will work on. “Given the terms we have right now, in the state economically and then eventually financially and budgetary wise, you never want to be lacking some additional activists resources,” says Brady. The new senator went to NYPIRG meetings last semester, which he says were well attended. “It seems like they had a lot on their plate. They may not have been glamorous or sexy, but they were trying to do different things as they always are.” A full NYPIRG program at Stony Brook included two full time project coordinators and a number of student interns. The coordinators earned a salary

plus benefits, while the interns earned academic credit. “It’s just a more broader program than the average club,” says Morrison. This year The Stony Brook Press will publish its newspapers with $32,000 in budget allocation, while the Meteorology Club will predict the weather with $2,203. While NYPIRG at Stony Brook now has no budget, chapters remain funded and popular at some New York schools. But the organization’s presence is a source of controversy at others. In July, a group of CUNY students filed suit against NYPIRG, protesting how the organization collects funds from student activity fees. Brady says that like any other institution, the USG senate “has it’s own culture.” Brady wants to see NYPIRG back on campus, but at the same time he shares the board with incumbents who thought that last year NYPIRG wasn’t doing anything. And when all was said and done, those present day incumbents Andrew Fraley passed a budget that allocated $0 for NYPIRG. “From our perspective it’s starting to seem like an ideological thing,” says Morrison. “This small group of students with all the power seemed to oppose NYPIRG’s work.” With the USG budget, student politicians debate over a plan worth nearly $3,000,000. Voter turnout for student elections at Stony Brook are commonly low; only seven percent of eligible voters cast their ballot last April. Thus it’s hard to determine if the USG senate is a representation of the student body and their views. An inquiry to three random freshmen sitting in the Union’s fireside lounge revealed zero name recognition for NYPIRG and a low familiarity of USG. Last year, educating students about USG was a job of NYPIRG’s.

8

Vol. XXX, Issue 2 | Wednesday, October 1, 2008

features

Physics Makes Us All Its Bitches By Najib Aminy and Will Dunn

Three-thousand eight-hundred and sixteen miles east of Stony Brook University, just outside Geneva, Switzerland, CERN scientists are accelerating atoms at 99.9995% the speed of light through the Large Hadron Collider in what is the largest and most expensive scientific project ever to take place in human history. Thirteen miles east of Stony Brook University, Brookhaven scientists are working on a precursor model of the LHC, called the Relativistic Heavy Ion Collider. In both projects, Stony Brook has contributed significantly with numerous personnel working at each location. Within a particle accelerator such as LHC and RHIC, two beams of particles are accelerated to velocities approaching the speed of light. Upon reaching these speeds, the two beams will collide resulting in a small-scale Big Bang phenomenon. As Brookhaven Scientist and part-time Stony Brook Physics professor Todd Satogata said, “the energy generated through a particle collision is comparable to the collision of two mosquitoes.” However, the relative energy density—the amount of energy in a given space—for a particle collision is exponentially greater than two mosquitoes colliding due to the massive amounts of energy in such a small area. Within each project, different experiments are run to analyze all aspects of particle collisions. These experiments will allow scientists to understand “what the world is made out of,” as ATLAS Operations Deputy Manager Howard Gordon said. Stony Brook is most involved with the ATLAS experiment, a detector responsible for tracking particles resulting from collisions, in the LHC. ATLAS’ design was based primarily on Brookhaven’s own STAR project at the RHIC, which serves a similar purpose. In participating in both RHIC and the LHC, Stony Brook has joined the collaborative world effort in answering some of the most fundamental questions posed to the Standard Physics Model. This model could be proven true or flawed with the detection of the Higgs Boson. If detected, the model will prove true; if absent, scientists will be forced to readjust the accepted understanding of physics. Also called the

GOD particle, the Higgs Boson is believed to be responsible for allocating mass to an atom due to the properties of the strong force. Stony Brook’s own Physic’s staff member, Dmitri Tysbychev, who is currently working at CERN, said, “if the Higgs Boson is present, the LHC will pick it up.” The LHC is the first particle accelerator capable of detecting the Higgs Boson due to its sheer size and its ability to

ment such as data acquisition and upgrading research and development. Currently, Tysbychev and other Stony Brook staff members are working on conditioning and calibrating detectors in ensuring that they operate smoothly. A large part of ATLAS’ design and function was due in part to Brookhaven’s STAR experiment at the RHIC. The concept, simple in theory,

The STAR detector

produce velocities closer to the speed of light then ever before. “We will be able to detect whether Higgs exists or not because of the luminosity and the high momentum quark collisions taking place,” said ATLAS Operations Deputy Program Manager Howard Gordon of Brookhaven National Labs. Luminosity is the number of collisions, which is increased due to a larger ring size at CERN than compared to smaller accelerators. If the Higgs particle was to be detected, it would be either at ATLAS or a similar experiment, called CMS, that track particles after collision. ATLAS and CMS serve to record and track the result of particle collisions. Brookhaven scientist Gene van Buren explained the purpose of ATLAS as “lighting a firecracker and putting the firecracker back together.” By analyzing the pieces of the fire cracker immediately after the explosion properties about the whole firecracker can be determined, added van Buren. Both Stony Brook and Brookhaven play a large role in the ATLAS experi-

though highly complex in practice is designed to record a digital photograph of particles immediately after collisions. According to van Buren, the STAR takes a thousand photos per second, tracking post-collision particle trajectories. The ATLAS and CMS detector serve the same function; only the ATLAS and CMS are more advanced, bigger and capable of recording faster collisions. Critics of the LHC have sparked controversy citing the possibility of creating black holes that could destroy the world. When asked about black holes, Gordon confirmed that the LHC will be accelerating particles fast enough to create black holes. But Gordon cited Cambridge professor Steven Hawkins’ theory on black holes, stating that a black hole needs excessive amounts of energy to sustain itself. In addition, the mass of the colliding atoms would be so small that the hole would only exist for a few moments and disappear within a fraction of a second. Should a black hole form, it would be “conjectured to produce

9

The Stony Brook Press

PHYSICS continued from page 8

spectacular signatures and would not be confused with standard interactions,” said Gordon. The LHC fired up in early September but due to a leak in the helium pipes, the collider will be inactive while repairs are being made. The LHC is to start up again in early spring during the same time in which RHIC will be reactivated. This delay has increased anticipation for the results of LHC and the possible answers to the fundamental questions of the Standard Physics Model, and more exciting, to the new questions that may be posed. As Van Buren said, what goes on in both RHIC and the LHC “is important

features because it helps scientists understand the Universe. This understanding can be put to [more practical] use down the road.” Only thirteen miles away, scientists are engaged in this cutting edge research in hopes of making the unknown known. Stony Brook, in conjunction with Brookhaven, have established their roles in the scientific world with its involvement in such groundbreaking research and look to pave the way to the evolution of physics. As Satogata said, “it is important for locals to know what is in their backyard such as this world class facility.”

Sex and the City, But No Sex In The Brook? By Cindy Liu and Kelly Yu

Every year, the freshman packs include things that students will only look at once, throw in the closet, and never look at again. Deep down in the bags, an innocent freshman used to find condom packs supplied by the Center for Prevention and Outreach (CPO). This year, the infamous condom packs were missing. Included with one Lifestyle and one Trojan condom was literature about sexually transmitted infections (STIs) and safe sex. According to Associate Dean and Director of CPO Jenny Hwang, “We are focusing on providing condom packs in contexts where there is opportunity to provide educational information about safer sex practices.” Replacing the mandatory condoms in the packs was a voluntary event, “Condom Casino,” in which students gambled with condoms that could be exchanged for prizes. One girl left with flip-flops. CPO, an on-campus organization, devotes itself to educating and promoting the general well-being of the individual. Their services include counseling for students, education through faculty and student peer educators, and advocacy services. In addition to education, they provide condoms for other non-CPO events, such as RA-organized activities for campus residents. The condoms provided come in boxes of 1,000. It costs $62 for a box of Lifestyle and $90 for a box of Trojans. These boxes are given to groups seeking to organize events that will in some way educate students about responsible sex. Students can ob-

tain free condoms through school-and RA-sponsored events; however, finding condoms otherwise is more difficult than one might think. When asked, “Where would you go to get condoms on campus?” the average student answered, “The vending machines at Kelly Dining or the Student Union.” How-

for $1. CPO runs the program Choosing Healthy Options In the College/Campus Environment (C.H.O.I.C.E.), which specializes in training peer educators to advise other students on matters of physical wellness, including sexual activity. According to Kathleen Valerio, a

ever, these vending machines are not always stocked, nor are they accessible to students who may live farther away (such as Tabler, Roth, and H quad residents). The Student Union closes at midnight, and it seems very unlikely one would make the run to the vending machines to pay $1 for only two condoms. The prices for condoms on campus vary. They range from $1 for four at the Student Health Center pharmacy to $2.49 for three at the Seawolves Marketplace. These rates pale in comparison to other SUNY schools, such as SUNY Oswego, which sell ten condoms

previous instructor for C.H.O.I.C.E, “the topics covered were related to physical health – cancer risk awareness, safer sex, and overall health and wellness, which included nutrition.” However, this semester, the new instructor for C.H.O.I.C.E., Ellen Driscoll, will be teaching a new curriculum. This new curriculum will focus on addiction and sexual assault. They will integrate sex into situations involving substance abuse and assault, but do not mention if they will also talk about healthy sex practices, such as contraceptives. According to Kathleen Valerio, “We had to

find a better way of addressing student requests in a more effective way…Statistically speaking, addiction and sexual assault will have a greater impact upon student life in the here and now.” A focus on safe sex is put aside for a focus on alcohol and substance abuse in the context of rape and sexual assault. This shift in focus potentially leaves students unaware and unprepared for other sexual situations. There are also other opportunities for students to obtain condoms in their buildings. RAs organize building programs in order to educate their residents on many different issues, such as safe sex. When asked, an RA from Eleanor Roosevelt Quad said that he had heard of two different sex education programs during his time living in ERQ. “The one that I went to was about STDs. We put candy in a bag, depending on the candy we got, that was the disease you got. Then the RA would tell us what the disease was and what to do to prevent it.” Also, when asked about condom distribution in his building, he replied, “It’s nonexistent. Sometimes we have them readily available,” but it is at the individual RA’s discretion. One RA makes little packets of condoms and leaves them for her residents to take; however, not all residents in other buildings or quads are as resourceful. With the inconsistency of condom availability on campus and the amount of education provided for the student body, one is forced to wonder how responsible the university is for providing means of safe sex practices. Stony Brook’s sex education is like an unused condom: available, but ultimately wasted.

10 Features

Vol. XXX, Issue 2 | Wednesday, October 1, 2008

STONY BROOK vs HOFSTRA Photos by Liz Kaufman

The Stony Brook Press

Want your club/organization to be featured in a future Club Spotlight?

Features E-mail The Press at [email protected]

11

12 Features

Vol. XXX, Issue 2 | Wednesday, October 1, 2008

R-E-C-Y-C-L-E: Recycle! By Jessica Rybak

One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. In order to learn the true meaning of this phrase, I put in some time at Stony Brook’s Recycling and Resource Management headquarters. At first glance, the department was a humble building with a pale green exterior, exactly what I’d expected to see in an organization so dedicated to spreading a positive message. Signs depicting recycling instructions, motivation and explanations littered the walls. “Come on everybody, let’s get green, before Mother Nature gets real mean,” was written in green ink on a dry erase board in the hallway. As an avid fan of saving the environment, I made light of manager Mike Youdelman’s warning that “sorting” would be unpleasant and tiresome. “Sorting,” as it has been nicknamed by long-time employees, is the process of deciphering which category paper fits into while it rolls by on a conveyor belt, then tossing it into a giant bin with papers of the like. This includes paper that’s been disposed by the entire uni-

versity. Tons of paper, newspaper, magazines, textbooks, essays, loose-leaf paper, cardboard boxes and so much more shuffled by in endless circulation all day. Although the department handles both the actual practice of recycling and reaching out to students on the topic, I began with the former, which provides a more hands-on approach to making a difference. Youdelman told me that he would rather I began by sorting recyclables because it would show me the reality of how important it is for students to know how to recycle. And his intentions were well met. While sorting through bins designated for paper recyclables, I frequently found evidence that convinced me that students carelessly toss their trash wherever the nearest receptacle lies. To be honest, I can understand that it’s difficult to envision where your garbage will end up. So it doesn’t faze you when you drop it off, but take it from someone who has had to handle your trash: it sucks. After you drop your waste off, there’s someone waiting to pick it up and hopefully use it as one small step towards a better world. I’ve become one of those people, and I can vouch for the frustration that

Jessica Rybak

If you can guess how many boxes are in there you win a free Stony Brook Press t-shirt

it causes when a batch of paper is sprinkled with crumbs from a granola bar or used tissues. (In case anyone had doubts, used tissues are not recyclable paper.) Russ Cannova, Recycling Supervisor, explained a similar problem that is found within the school pertaining to bottles found in residence halls’ recycling bins. “Some of them have a lot of garbage inside of them, so our guys have to clean it all and take the trash out,” says Cannova. Although sifting through recycling to ensure its cleanliness didn’t seem like a time consuming operation or even a necessary one when I began working, I now understand the gravity of the public doing whatever it can to make the process run more smoothly. This one department handles collecting and recycling paper, bottles, cans, ink jets, toner, wood, carpeting, metal and even ceiling tiles. Combine that with a staff of approximately 20 people and the threat of “contamination,” the proper term for when unrecyclables mix with the good stuff, and you’ve got a load of responsibility on your hands. “We’ve come a long way in the last few years,” says Cannova, adding “To me, it’s not as bad of a problem now as it used to be, but it is still there.” Ac-

cording to Cannova, Stony Brook’s recycling program began in the 1980’s by “two students and one little truck,” and the program merely “grew from there.” Statistics of this department show that in the last three years alone the amount of recycled tonnage has jumped from approximately 2,000 tons in 2005 to almost 40,000 tons in 2007. Cannova attributes this improvement to Youdelman. “I give Mike a lot of credit. He put it all together to make it easier for people to recycle, and if it’s easy for people it’ll become a habit. It’s an easy habit to save the planet!” Look out for tables where the Recycling and Resource Management squad will be spreading the message at the SAC and the Union on November 15, which is America Recycles Day. I can truly say that I’ll never look at a piece of paper or an empty bottle with the same sentiment after this experience. After seeing the extensive process that it takes to recycle, it put the larger part of the public’s inability to go the extra mile in perspective. After you’ve bid adieu to your empty water bottle or crumpled your receipt from a local SINC Site, you have the choice between whether or not you want to breathe new life into your old recyclable.

News

The Stony Brook Press

Club Spotlight

ASA : Asian Student Alliance

ASA was formed in the mid-90ʼs by Asian American students of all ethnicities whose native language was English and wanted a supportive panasian cultural community. Until then most clubs held their meetings in their native languages and their events were geared for immigrant students. Each Fall ASA holds the largest Asian interest cultural show, Asian Night, featuring modern and traditional performances. It was at the first Asian Night that the first SBU Asian American student rock band performed. With all the other clubs doing their major shows in the Spring, ASA has taken over the role of organizer of multi-club events like the Nations of Asia Semi-formal and promoting attendance at the annual ECAASU conferences. ASAʼs other events include food tastings, game nights, Sudoku tournaments, talent shows, dance-a-thons, and more. In tune with more serious issues brought up at ECAASU, the East Coast Asian American Student Union, ASA also leads workshops of importance to Asian American students like dealing with stereotypes, discrimination, and providing leadership opportunities.

PUSO : Philippine United Student Organization

PUSO shares the Filipino culture with the student body through performances, workshops, meetings, and events. It provides a friendly network for students of similar backgrounds and interests to bond and interact. PUSO discusses contemporary and historical issues dealing with the Philippines, stereotypes, and the clash between liberal and Americanism and conservative Filipino Culture. One can call an Asian Filipino, Chinese, Korean, and many other specific nationalities but what PUSO members strive together to do is to discover what it means to be Asian American. PUSOʼs logo is the word for “love” in Tagolog, the native Filipino language. PUSA holds many events. In the Fall is Open Mic Night, Halo-Halloween, Simbang Gabi, and Gawad Kalinga Fundraiser. In the Spring is PUSOfest. PUSO takes part in joint activities like Asian Awareness Week and the Nations of Asia SemiFormal. Its members attend the regional Please visit FIND conferences each semester. http://www.aaezine.org/ PUSOʼs dance team performs in camto find out about the pus shows and Battle of the Barrios, a other Asian and Asian regional colleges dance competition. American Clubs on campus.

CASB : Chinese Association at Stony Brook

CASB, the oldest Asian interest club with the oldest annual cultural show, China Night, will be 40 years old in 2010. In 2003, when Distinguished Alumni Award winner Wai Lam was a speaker, he joked how the last time he was on the Union stage was as a performer in China Night - and he graduated in 1982! China Night has morphed into a different show from its first days in Cantonese - now in English. It has a story line that showcases traditional and modern acts but now favors dance and step routines and sizzling fashion shows. CASB holds many events including a singing contest, game nights, and mah jong and poker tournaments. It does not have weekly meetings but events during many of its block-booked times. Events are on the AA E-Zine and SBU calendars and sent out on Facebook. The most successful event of the first Asian American Awareness Week was CASBʼs first mah jong tournament in the Wang Center. It also co-sponsors the Nations of Asia Semi-Formal, sends a contigent of its members to ECAASU, and its dance team performs at other campus shows.

SASA : South Asian Student Alliance

SASA, the South Asian Student Alliance, began as Club India and is the second oldest Asian cultural club on campus. It changed its name in 2000 to reflect the number of students of South Asian descent who are not Indian but share many of the same cultural traditions, such as Guyanese students, and those of surrounding South Asian countries such as Bangladesh and Pakistan. SASA's pressure on SBU helped lead to the formation of the Center for India Studies in 1997. SASA works in conjunction with offshoots that have formed such as BU (Bengalis Unite), Club Om/DSA(Desi Student Association, which began as a more religious club but became DSA to better reflect Indian American students), Sikh SA, WISO (West Asian Student Association), the Indian interest frats lota Nu Delta and Sigma Beta Rho, and dance groups Thillana, SB Bhangra Team, and SB Di Shaan Bhangra. SASA puts on two large shows each year, the Charity Show to raise funds for scholarships and humanitarian aid, and SHOLAY, its annual cultural show. SHOLAY is so popular, its tickets sell out within the first hour they go on sale! It also has a fashion show, weekly meetings for socializing, and an off-campus semi-formal. To check out SASA's latest happenings, use Facebook.

www.aa2sbu.org/aaezine in SB Press Vol 30 No 2 September 2008

Weekly meetings every Friday at 2:30 PM in our office, Student Union 071

14 Features

Vol. XXX, Issue 2 | Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Voter Myths Busted! By Alex Nagler

There are many myths and misconceptions about registering to vote on a college campus. Sources, whose intentions are to obfuscate the process have been preventing students from voting in a location that they live eight months out of the year. A student lives on a campus for the majority of a year, shops in its local stores, uses its local facilities, and contributes to its local economy. They have every right to vote in the area they live. So, with that, let’s look at three major myths about registering to vote on campus. Jury Duty The first claim is that registering to vote makes you eligible for jury duty, forcing you to subject to one of the more tedious aspects of our democracy. Jury duty, though an essential part of our judicial process and the civic duty of all Americans, is boring. Well, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but if you have a driver’s license, they have your

number. Plus, Stony Brook is a state school controlled by the state government, the same government that controls the judicial system. They’re going to send you your assignment regardless of if you register to vote or not. So the claim, “I don’t want to be called up for jury duty” doesn’t work. Can’t Claim Dependent Dependency status is something that all families of college students rely upon. It’s the right of your parents to tell the government that you’re their problem, and therefore they deserve $3500 off their income taxes. Obviously this is a very good thing for parents, but some students have been told that if they register to vote, they’ll be unable to let their parents claim them as dependents. This is simply not true. The Brennan Center for Justice at New York University School of Law has this to say on the issue: “If you make less than $3500 in a year and your parents provide more than half of your support (money spent on your food, housing, clothes, health care,

tuition, books, laundry, car, etc.) for that year, you are a qualifying relative and are your parents’ dependent no matter where you live. If you earn more than $3500, it’s true that your residency could have some effect on your parents’ ability to claim you as a dependent, but voter registration is only one of many factors that will be considered.” Registering to vote is not going to keep your folks from claiming you. Lose Your Scholarship Scholarships are, for those who have them, the vital lifeblood of attending school without destroying their own or their parent’s savings accounts. New York doesn’t have any rules about loss of scholarship for registering or reregistering elsewhere, and unless you’re from Rhode Island, you don’t have anything to worry about. Place of registration does not affect any federally given financial aid, such as Pell, Perkins, Stafford, or SMART. It doesn’t affect private loans either. It doesn’t even affect FAFSA. The only time you could be in jeopardy here is if you received a pri-

Jesus Is Just Alright With Me By Jonathan Singer

Apparently, Jesus is a very popular person, even at a science heavy school like Stony Brook. While his status as the son of (a) God is always up for debate, each week over one hundred SBU students congregate in SAC room 302 to praise the famous religious figure. Members of Stony Brook’s Intervarsity Christian Fellowship are evangelical and fundamentalist, but that doesn’t stop them from being hip and normal college students. Many of them wear crosses around their necks, and at least one in attendance, like JC, Moses and Elijah, had survived a forty day fast. But instead of praying in some ancient language, traditional prayers are forgone for songs by popular artists like Charlie Hall, Chris Tomlin, Phil Wickham and the Christian rock band Delirious?. Performing these songs live is the Worship Team, a five piece band that one hip Christian described as being “off the chain.” One of the team’s guitar players wears a Red Hot Chili Peppers shirt, while the forty day fast survivor

wears a Barack Obama “Change” shirt. Frank, a senior, Baptist and white, admits that he’s possibly a minority at the Intervarsity meeting. He jokingly self deprecates, admitting that to an outsider, the thought of an event sponsored by The Intervarsity Christian Fellowship conjures up images of “crackers” praying together. But Intervarsity is a multi denominational organization, and with that comes racial diversity. Frank is white, the faster in the Obama shirt is black, and another Christian in attendance chose Intervarsity over SBU’s Korean Christian Fellowship. “People of all faiths can come here,” says Jason Philip, President of Stony Brook’s Intervarsity chapter. Once inside, all in attendance unite to praise (one specific) God and Jesus. For one night a week, SAC 302 is turned into a mega-church, not in size but in the way the patron’s behave. These are very passionate issues, and some of the kids at Intervarsity show that passion by raising their arms in praise, busting out freestyle prayers (a very conservative version of beatnik spoken word jams) and even speaking in tongues. Of course, the origin of these

tongued outbursts can’t be proven and President Philip is willing to admit that his school is primarily a science university. Every day at school the average Intervarsity faithful faces lectures about evolutionary biology and physical cosmology, as well as arguments in the social sciences favoring abortion and gay marriage. But just as the club is diverse in race, it is also diverse in terms of academia. Frank, for example, is a double major in Psychology and Biology. “I guess the real test is if you have faith or if you don’t,” says Frank. Frank believes that one day a few years ago, God had the idea of making a Big Bang. Then that God had a son, who is great by Intervarsity standards. They only mention that greatness at least 100 times, or one for each member of the assembled audience. Non-believers should not worry. At the end of each prayer session, the prayer leader instructs everyone to hold hands and pray for thirty seconds. Fifteen seconds for the person on one’s left, and fifteen for the person on one’s right. That’s the only part of the service where an atheist wouldn’t fit in.

vate scholarship based solely on where you live. So, there we have it. Jury duty, dependency, and scholarship are all no longer reasons you shouldn’t register to vote on a college campus. Neither are health or car insurance. Sorry if I just took away all of your excuses. Now get up off your ass and register to vote. The New York State deadline is October 10.

Features

The Stony Brook Press

15

Will The Real Dark “Horse” Candidate Please Stand Up? By Marcel Votlucka

With voter turnout and public confidence in their elected officials at an all-time low, one wonders: is there truly a viable candidate this election season who represents the People? Answer: of “horse” there is! Meet RUFUS, independent candidate for Presidency of the United States – and possibly the most unique candidate you will ever encounter in this frenzied “horse-race.” Born and raised on his father’s ranch in rural Montana, RUFUS is running for P.O.T.U.S. to fight for the interests of the people closest to his heart – small town Americans fed up with Washington snobbery and eager for a real “hoedown” on Capitol Hill! “It started with the small time ranchers and rural cowboys and farmers,” explains Cheryl Brown, RUFUS’ campaign manager and personal assistant. “Y’know, the people most ignored by the media and the politickin’ politicians in D.C. They were at the forefront of the ‘Draft RUFUS’ movement last year. Before we knew it, we had petitions coming in from all over the country begging for RUFUS to shake up the boring ol’ horse-race.” Indeed, RUFUS’ rising success is thanks to a dedicated base of supporters drawn to his simple yet powerfully inspiring message – “Pulling America out of the MUCK of bipartisanship!” Without any central direction from the candidate or his team, his supporters have created a massive Internet following, making RUFUS the number two

most Googled candidate behind Rep. Ron Paul (R-TX). But with this popularity has comes sharp criticism of RUFUS’ admitted lack of political experience and the “unknown” factor – RUFUS has never held a single elected office.

only true maverick jockeying for position in this race! We need a fresh start; shake things up with a true Washington outsider like RUFUS! How many candidates can say they were born and raised on a ranch and made their living working at rodeos? How all-American-

“His idea of a sound foreign policy involves whinniying and whining as if we can simply scare the terrorists away like so many rodeo clowns,” says Vice Presidential candidate Sen. Joe Biden (D-DE). “Maybe that’ll work out in Montana, but this is Washington. We need proven leadership and experience to do the job of protecting Americans from the likes of Al Qaeda.” But that matters little to RUFUS’ most devout backers, such as Noah Whitegrass of Paducah, KY, “He’s the

apple-pie can you get?” A Facebook group called “I Support RUFUS for Prez in ‘08!” has recently appeared; a testament to the candidate’s sudden popularity. Pundits have mixed feelings about RUFUS. “He’s a real dark-horse candidate. It’ll be exciting to see how this plays out,” says George Stephanopoulos, of ABC. Bill O’Reilly remarked at a recent book signing, “I wonder if these pinheads at the RUFUS campaign are just going for the lowest common de-

nominator here?” “He’s as full of sh*t as the rest of ‘em,” retorts Keith Olbermann. “The only question is: bull or horse?” Fellow Presidential candidates Barack Obama and John McCain have so far refrained from weighing in on RUFUS; perhaps not taking him seriously due to his low standing in official public polls. Moreover, RUFUS is not officially on the ballot in any of the 50 States because of his failure to meet controversial ballot access requirements. Instead, voters may place ballots for RUFUS as a write-in candidate. His campaign managers have turned this seemingly mutable tactic into a major selling point; a political “maverick” and “outsider” struggling to get the people’s voices heard – as his first televised political ad asserts – “one way or another...and that ain’t no horse-hockey!” Independent Presidential candidate Ralph Nader was quick to point out “the partisan biases that are inherent in ballot access laws – you have the two major parties, that control ballot access, lock out competing candidates, lock us out from the debates, put innumerable hurdles in our path. This is a real tragedy, an insult to democracy, and I welcome fellow candidates like RUFUS who are willing to saddle themselves with the responsibility of challenging this bipartisan gridlock.” Whether you’re Obama, McCain, or RUFUS, the stakes are high and the path is unsure in this election. But don’t be surprised if our modern-day political Seabiscuit pulls through to a photo finish this November!

Be Joi n

20

S u p er! The

PRESS!!!

16 Features

Vol. XXX, Issue 2 | Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Freedom & Ethics: The NYU J-School Controversy By Najib Aminy

When New York University Junior Alana Taylor wrote an opinionated article about her journalism class and the current digital revolution, she hoped that it would spark dialogue and propose solutions among her readers. Little did she know that her article would light a fire to a controversial debate of media ethics and create waves in the giant ocean of the blogosphere. The article, posted on a PBS Web blog, MediaShift, was aimed at presenting Taylor’s perspective of being an NYU journalism student amidst a new digital wave. Titled “Old Thinking Permeates Major Journalism School,” Taylor reported on her thoughts of the NYU Journalism department citing her journalism class, “Reporting for Generation Y,” in its approach to changing with the times. For example, in the fourth annual “State of the Blogosphere,” conducted by Technorati, the report states that in a 2008 study, 184 million people worldwide have started their own blog while 346 million worldwide read these blogs. With the apparent shift to the Internet, less people are getting their news from newspapers, magazines and television broadcasts. More and more people are looking to the “series of tubes” for answers. Fully aware of this fact, Taylor’s piece is centralized on the importance of the new shift to digital media, and questions the NYU Journalism Department’s hesitation to teach on this newage revolution. However when Taylor’s professor, Mary Quigley, read the article and confronted Taylor about it, a second story was written by Taylor’s editor, Mark Glaser, that sparked even more controversy. According to Taylor, in a private meeting Quigley said, “we could agree for you to no longer write about this class.” Quigley then addressed the classroom of sixteen students letting them know about Taylor’s article, emphasizing that students were not to report about the class. With the foundation of journalism based upon the freedoms of speech and the press, Quigley’s response to prohibit a student from writing about her class has sparked controversy. “She told me I violated the students rights, their personal privacy, that I was wrong on many ethical levels, and about how I should’ve sought permission,” Taylor said in response to what Quigley had. In New York State the only law pertaining to personal privacy matters are

among the consolidated laws which states: “the right of privacy of a person, firm or corporation that uses for advertising purposes, or for the purposes of trade, the name, portrait or picture of any living person without having first obtained the written consent of such person, or if a minor of his or her parent or guardian, is guilty of a misdemeanor.” Some critics claim that Taylor failed to conform to the NYU Journalism

they say in class, due to a possibility of it being published, whether online or in print. “My concern is in anything that tends to limit freedom of expression in the classroom or which would be detrimental to the educational purpose of the university.” In preserving the freedom of the classroom, Professor Quigley may have stepped over some boundaries, possibly posing a threat to the freedoms upon which journalism is based. Director of

Code of Ethics which states, “the vast majority of time, journalists should make clear to the people they are interviewing that they are journalists. State your name and affiliation up front.” By not informing Professor Quigley or her fellow students, some see Taylor as the one at fault for failing to follow procedure as well as the rules of her own institution. PBS Ombudsman Michael Getler, wrote in an editorial that Taylor was unique from other bloggers because she was hired, though not for money, by MediaShift, which would make it an obligation for her to inform her professor of the story. “This was a journalism student in a journalism department who did this without either telling the teacher what she was doing or who she was doing it for, without asking permission of the teacher or other classmates (one classmate is quoted anonymously, also not a great journalistic habit to get in to), without checking content or asking for the teacher’s views of the author’s critical assessments, and without, of course, identifying her national connection to PBS,” said Getler. In response to Taylor’s article, Stony Brook’s Dean of the School of Journalism, Howard Schneider, said that the only problem he would have with blogging or reporting about any class is if it results in students worrying about what

the Arthur L. Carter Journalism Institute of NYU, Brooke Kroeger, said in the MediaShift article, titled, “NYU Professor Stifles Blogging, Twittering by Journalism Student,” that it was up to the professors to allow or restrict students from writing about what occurred in class. In an email response, Kroeger said, “We leave a great deal in matters of the classroom to the discretion of individual professors. There are, of course, some common understandings, but professors are generally free to decide such matters.” After reading Taylor’s article and the response article, Ethel Sorokin, of the Center for the First Amendment Rights, said she was in agreement with Taylor. “I didn’t see how discussing the teachers classroom approach was in any way demeaning or an invasion of privacy—[blogging is] an educational issue that all should be interested in.” Sorokin added that she does support the teacher as well, saying, “I’m with the student, but my feet and body are with the teacher, so both have to be open—in good First Amendment style—to the views of the other to achieve the ultimate best result which may be mostly blogging in the future.” Schneider, who said he has met Quigley before, was a little baffled by her response. “I am a little confused myself as to what her ob-

jections are. It appeared to me that at one point she felt this could be disruptive to the class. So it was not a response about whether this was negative about her or the class, and she was trying to stop people from saying bad things,” said the former Newsday Editor. When asked about Taylor’s article, Quigley emailed, responding that she could not comment other than to clarify her policy on reporting about her class. “I don’t allow live blogging, texting, e-mailing, or twittering during class. It is distracting to both me and the students, especially in a class with students seated around a seminar table. Once a student steps outside of the classroom he is free to make any and all comments in whatever forum he chooses,” Quigley said. However, Taylor says she never wrote any bit of her article in Quigley’s class. Confused about it herself, Taylor viewed Quigley’s response as a reversal of what she had said earlier and possibly softening her stance from before. While talking to Taylor on her own take of the situation, she noted that with the exception of a few handful of reporters, no one has yet to interview her for comment. Taylor was not expecting the huge amount of feedback her article had received, noting that everyone who had commented had a strong opinion. Taylor’s response to breaking journalistic ethic codes was that she had not intended on writing her thoughts of the NYU journalism department as an exposé. Rather, as she put it, “A Day in the Life of Alana Taylor” type of story that would provide readers an inside look at a student attending a top-tier journalism institution. Taylor, who wrote her article after the first day of class, says that the mood of the classroom has returned to normalcy, and both she and Professor Quigley have agreed to move on as if the article were never written in the first place. Taylor said she felt like there was bit of sensationalism when it came to naming the headlines of her article as well as the follow-up story, but when asked if she would do it again, she quickly replied yes. Taylor’s intention of promoting the importance of blogging was, in her eyes, successful. “Regardless of whether people agreed or not, the article was posted on a web blog, in which discussion resulted, which proves that blogs are effective.” Asked if fellow NYU students recognize her from the article that she has written, Taylor replied, “No, I usually wear a hat.”

Features

The Stony Brook Press

17

We here at e Stony Brook Press, aer extensive discussion and thought, have decided to stand in solidarity with Alana Taylor. Many of us are future journalists, and it’s impossible to ignore the fact that online mediums of the cra are on their way to surpassing printed forms. In addition, she has every right to write whatever she desires about her classes.. It is the job of the professors to respond to it professionally, or simply ignore it completely. But they have no basis to claim she cannot write it. So, as a display of our stance, some of us have decided to write a small selection about our classes, departments or semesters here at Stony Brook. We know this isn’t an online blog, but we hope it gets our professors’ (and, indeed, those at the NYU School of Journalism) attention, anyway. Some of these pieces aren’t even meant to be inflammatory. ey simply are meant to demonstrate that, as journalists and the future professionals of the world, we have the right to write whatever we like about whomever or whatever we like. Keep up the good work, Alana. And to all the rest of the journalists and writers out there, always remember that we here at e Stony Brook Press will stand by you when you need it. Never stop writing, blogging, or even twittering! Sincerely, e Stony Brook Press A Day in ANP 330: Human Evolution at Stony Brook University

EGL 243 and You: Shakespeare, Videbaek, Henry

A piece in defiance by Andrew Jacob

Today in EGL 243 we continued our ongoing discussion of Shakespeare’s Henry IV: Part I. To those unfamiliar with Shakespeare’s histories, Henry IV is a two-part play and Part I is one-fourth of a larger tetralogy. We were in the middle of Act III, scene iii, in which King Henry voices his disappointment in his son, Hal, and threatens to remove him from the line of secession. It’s easy to feel bad for Hal, as he wanted to become responsible on his own terms, but now he can’t, thanks to a stupid civil war. We also discussed axing Anthony and Cleopatra from the syllabus to allow for more fun with Henry and one of Professor Videbaek’s favorite characters in all of Shakespeare - John Falstaff. I’ve mentioned Professor Videbaek in this paper before, mainly commenting that she’s the sole professor I know to teach a class in a Trogdor t-shirt, though it pales in comparison to her “Viking World Tour” shirt. She’s pretty much the only professor I search for in the course catalogue and whose class I take regardless of what it is. That led me to develop a completely rational disgust of gloves thanks to her Elizabethan Tragedy course last spring. We should finish Henry IV: Part I next week, though it could be later thanks to Jewish Holiday related disruptions. I’m sad that we don’t do Part II or Henry V after it. I may read them both over the winter when I have the time, even though I already know one of the most famous speeches from V- the Saint Crispin’s Day speech. Alright, class is over. I have to go to the Press office now and watch the rest of the staff pitch this idea. Good thing I came prepared.

Today in ANP 330, there was a nine question quiz. It was numbered to 10 due to a deletion of a question and then not fixing the error, but that’s not really important. The quiz covered the past four or five lectures which focused on the fossil record of apes during the Miocene. I think I got a 77 on it due to some random guessing on a few questions. The professor is James Rossie, a lighthearted and comical anthropologist who graduated from Yale and occasionally works in Kenya digging up fossils and the like. Midway through the quiz he left the room and came back with two bottles of ginger ale, claiming that the machine gave him two for the price of one. Score one for the consumer. Post-quiz time was taken up by a lecture on the nature and characteristics of bipedal humans in contrast to suspensory apes. It was probably the second or third time I had gone through the subject, due to covering it in other classes in the past. Regardless, it is always a fun subject to discuss and Dr. Rossie makes the subject even better with his crude drawings, pop culture references, and stories about anthropologists in the past being wrong or misinterpreting things that we now see as obvious. The class finally ended as we were just about to discuss the Laetoli footprints found in Africa which show that some creature was bipedal about 3.5 million years ago. Monday’s class should be interesting as we dive deeper into the fossil record which shows evidence of bipedalism in apes very long before humans were around.

Future Teachers Earning Their Stripes By James Laudano In case you were wondering, the teachers of tomorrow learn the ropes in SSE 350, Foundations of Education. The course is required for any teacher seeking state certification from Stony Brook University. The course has been taught for years by Dr. Georges Fouron, an impassioned individual who makes things entertaining even though the content sometimes isn’t. The workload consists of two research papers. One of which is fifteen pages long, and another of a currently unknown length. This year, the course centers on how American grade school education has been lacking over the past few decades. So far, we’ve only covered how the foundations of American education have always been rather shaky going back as far as the early colonial period. In many ways the class just feels like a history lesson. However, the class really shines when Dr. Fouron goes off on one of his tangents and trashes conservative and/or bigoted aspects of society. It is a safe bet that he will do exactly this multiple times during a class session. It keeps things fresh and keeps the students on their toes. Now I’ve just gotta figure out what I’m going to write about for that fifteen-page paper.

Playing The “Transfer Student’s Wallet Blues” By Samantha Monteleone I’m a transfer student and since I’m a music major, I was put in this class, the History of Western Music. I’ll admit, the class itself is really awesome. Not only do we learn about Baroque composers and the music, we actually listen to and analyze the pieces in the class, and learn why they were created. I think that’s wonderful. However, there are six textbooks required for the class. Six. Four huge textbooks at exorbitant prices, and two whole anthology volumes of cd’s at $90 each. Now, I don’t have a job and I can reference the library to get the music fo’ free, but it takes eons. It just seems very difficult to obtain all the volumes, even though it’s such an awesome class. I’m torn between my ears and my wallet. We’ll see how it goes.

LIN 307: Sociolinguistics by Iris Lin I’m a Linguistics major and this semester I am taking LIN 211: Syntax and LIN 307: Sociolinguistics. My Sociolinguistics class only meets once a week, on Thursday nights from 5:30 to 8:30. As a result, we’ve only met four times so far this semester and Professor Weisenberg usually lets us out before 8:30. So far I am really enjoying the class and I wish we met more often. Usually we are assigned reading to do for the next class and during class we discuss intriguing topics such as dialects and gendered speech. Basically, we look at how language affects society and vice versa.

WRITE, BLOG, BROADCAST, CHALLENGE!

18

Vol. XXX, Issue 2 | Wednesday, October 1, 2008

arts&entertainment

Stony Brook Rocks! Well... It Used To, Anyhow By Jon Singer

Jimi Hendrix, The Who, The Grateful Dead, Jefferson Airplane and 3 Doors Down. This list should make everyone think of one thing: SUNY Stony Brook’s history as a renowned concert venue. Shortly after the campus was founded in 1962, Stony Brook hosted pop music concerts at a rate that was close to three shows per week. Thanks to the efforts of dedicated students who were in touch with the pulse of the time, the school became the premier music venue on Long Island. Stony Brook’s position as a large university approximately sixty miles from New York City, assisted in making the school a top suburban venue. Back then there were guidelines as to how promoters protected their territories. “They always used a fifty mile radius as a thing for protection,” says Norm Prusslin, former WUSB Station Manager, now the director of Stony Brook University’s Media Arts Program. Contracts had stipulations that prevented an act from performing at another venue within fifty miles of where they agreed to play a concert. Commonly using the East Village’s Filmore East as a reference point for the fifty mile radius, artists and bands would play Stony Brook shows to get themselves set before going into the city.

But just because the warm up show to the big city was at Stony Brook doesn’t mean that it was smaller. In May of 1970, Jefferson Airplane drew 16,000 (the cops counted) people to an outside show on the athletic fields. A year earlier The Who packed 3,000 fans into the Prichard Gymnasium, who paid fifty cents to see the popular British rock band. “It was rare for a Stony Brook concert to ever cost more than three or four dollars from the mid to late 60s to the early 70s,” says Prusslin. Prusslin goes on to explain how the concert industry was different in those decades, when The Who would cost $3,000. Back then students ran the show, treating concert promotion as an extracurricular of sorts. Stony Brook students like Mary Beth Olbrych (eek, a girl!) were active in the Student Activities Board, chaired at the time by Howie Klein. The SAB of the late 60s and early 70s booked The Moody Blues, The Doors, Janis Joplin and Jimi Hendrix There also was Soft White Underbelly, the band that would ultimately become Blue Oyster Cult. Prusslin says that, in retrospect, he doesn’t think any members of Blue Oyster Cult actually went to school at Stony Brook. While the BOC’s level of renown isn’t as high as some other bands who’ve passed through Stony Brook, their presence at the school (perhaps one of them was a part-time student) helped SUNY Stony Brook become the only non human inductee into the Long Island Music Hall of Fame. Stony Brook was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 2006, along with Billy Joel and three members of KISS (sorry Ace, maybe if you lived here). With Billy Joel tickets costing $300 for his last concert at Shea Stadium, it’s clear that the music industry has changed since Stony Brook was the Long Island concert venue. Prusslin cites Woodstock as one turning point, when business minded rock fans realized they could build a whole industry after happenings at Woodstock, The Fillmore East and SUNY Stony Brook. The student population at Stony Brook was also a very different animal back then. “It was a very homogeneous audience,” says Prusslin. Since the mid 70s Stony Brook University has become more and more diverse, but back then the majority of students were Caucasian. While at the time there were obviously great efforts that strived to bring racial diversity to institutes of higher education, the reality was Stony Brook being

overwhelmingly white and likeminded. They were also like-minded in social class, and since college tuition was cheaper back then Prusslin explains that most students didn’t need to work a part time job outside of school. That gave student promoters like Sandy Pearlman, who named Blue Oyster Cult “Blue Oyster Cult,” more time to work with bands and book them gigs at Stony Brook. Eventually the Sandy Pearlmans of the world evolved into the major corporate promoters who bring mainstream bands to large arenas and stadiums. In the late 70s, 80s and 90s, there were moments where economies of scale happened to work out. U2 and the Red Hot Chili Peppers both played gigs at Stony Brook. “It was far and few in between compared to the way it was

and the prices of the bands were very high,” says Prusslin. Eight to ten shows a semester turned into two to three shows a semester, which turned into one or two shows a semester. It became difficult for the Student Activities Board to book concerts when the Dave Matthews Band cost around $250,000. But Stony Brook still has the infrastructure to host large-scale concerts. The arena is the successor to the Pritchard Gym, and was host to a 1990 Bob Dylan concert as well as a 2001 show featuring the popular rock band 3 Doors Down. “And then, of course, people talk about the wonderful goal of perhaps one day being able to have the stadium for a venue,” says Prusslin. For reference, it’s been more than four months and counting since Nas performed at Stony Brook.

20 Leftists And Freedom Haters General Secretary of The Central Committee of the All-Union Communist Party of Bolsheviks James Laudano Marshall of The Red Army Emma Kobolakis A Dirty Moslem Najib Aminy Minister of the Worker’s Capital Katie Knowlton Ministers of Truth Laura Cooper Jake Conarck Commissariat for Internal Affairs Alex Nagler

INSIDE THIS ISSUE:

Education For The Workers... Education For The Workers... Education For The Workers... Education For The Workers...

Page 24 Page 25 Page 26 Page 27

Entertainment For The Workers Andrew Fraley Uranium Enrichment Specialist Tia Mansouri A Real Live Russian! Roman Sheydvasser Ministers for Re-Education Cindy Liu Chris Mellides Kelly Yu SMERSH Chris Williams Future Chairman of the CCP Iris Lin

Our Mission: The goal of The Comrade is to offer an alternative point of view to the students of Stony Brook University. It is a paper dedicated to raising awareness of student issues on campus, and leftist/Marxist issues throughout the glorious workerʼs struggle against their oppressors. While we do, obviously, seek controversy, The Comrade strives to offer only opinions (read: facts) and news (read: propaganda) that will encourage the students of this campus to break free from the shackles of free-market society. We are dedicated to building upon and fostering the leftist and Marxist views that are strong among so many of us, yet suppressed by the capitalist pigs and their running dogs. But, ideology aside, all our news will be bound to three standards: we will always be opinionated, impulsive, and crass.

Previet, fellow oppressed workers! It is with great pleasure and honor that I welcome back The Comrade. It’s been a few semesters since we last published this glorious, informative pamphlet, but we felt the need had arisen once again. The dangerous plague of fascist and right-wing propaganda running rampant throughout our motherland has forced our hand. We have a new staff here at The Comrade, which is filled with many eager young Stalins, Molotovs and Maos ready to undermine the capitalist pigs and their running dogs here at Stony Brook. I will keep this brief since we have a great deal of work ahead of us. Just remember this: when the darkness of the current American free-market crisis seems too thick for you to navigate we shall be your shining Red light. Use us as your guide and remain vigilant! If you follow what you are about to read, the fascist invaders and oppressors will find themselves in the gulags faster than you can say “Za Rodina!” Sincerely, James Laudano General Secretary of The Party

is page is dedicated to the grandfather of Communism: Karl Marx Karl is the founder of the commuinist theory. His great works, e Communist Manifesto and Das Capital, inspire workers around the world to this very day. ank you, Karl!

21

Elect Obama... If You Want A Capitalist Pig Leading Us! By The Worlds Oldest Living Bolshevik

Comrades, there has been much talk of Senator Obama being a leftist, of being the most liberal senator in the United States Senate. Senator McCain himself brought this charge up in the first Presidential debate. It is an oft-repeated charge, that Democratic Candidate Who Is Also A Senator X is a Socialist. This is simply not true. As a Bolshevik, I know a good deal about socialism. Barrack Obama is not a socialist. He is a filthy capitalist pig dabbling in progressive politics. Americans are so quick to deem anything that isn’t the fascist politik that they are normally used to as socialist. The fear of the “nanny state” keeps conservatives awake at night, knowing full well that were the government to ever truly take charge and unite the workers, they’d be out of speaking gigs. The candidate’s pathetic attempts at “Universal Healthcare” would never pass in a true socialized

state. If America wanted any sort of working system of socialized medicine, they should have started it along with the countries they were paying to

care system today would fail as it is a political issue, sure to be scrapped the moment a party change happens. It will take ages for anything to come to

rebuild. The United Kingdom’s National Health Service turned sixty this year. Any feeble attempts at a health-

pass. America must take over its hospitals, pharmaceutical industries, and medical schools if it wishes to have a

healthcare system. Senator Obama proposes none of these things. Senator Obama doesn’t care about the true heroes of socialism- the workers. He is a filthy capitalist intent on adjusting the tax system to fit the needs of rich and poor. Capitalism demands the rich get richer off the backs of the poor, which is precisely what any tax proposal states. This mere fact disqualifies Senator Obama from any socialist club. Senator Obama blindly parrots the talking points of Israel in its belief that the only way to be strong is through massive military force, subjugating the poor into lives of soldiers and expanding the fascist American empire’s treasure trove. A true socialist would call for the immediate scrapping of the American Military and withdrawal from its posts throughout the world. Barack Obama is no socialist. He’s only dabbling in progressive politics, even if he may be one of the most progressive candidates seen in the field in a generation. And if his speeches are awesome.

is page is dedicated to the great leader of the Bolsheviks: Vladimir I. Lenin Vlad was the one who lead the great Bolshevik Revolution against the corrupt Czars, who ruled our Motherland like the capitalist pigs run the world today. His preserved body can still be found in Red Square in Moscow, waiting for the day when technology allows us to reanimate him so he can lead us once more to victory!

22

Did You Know: Stony Brook Patriot Alexander Chamessian misspelled his own first name in the most recent issue of his publication. In addition, our intelligence agents totally saw him at a gay pride parade. John Derbyshire would be proud!

If You Really Know Israel... By John Tucker

I’m going to live and work in Israel next summer. As a Jew I ultimately plan on moving to Israel. You’re welcome. I’ve been exposed to Israel my entire life. From catchy songs I sang in Hebrew school at age eight to my first trip to Israel in 2007, I’ve been taught propaganda from one side of a contentious argument. I am not implying that the pro-Israel propaganda is false. Organizations such as The David Project employ highly versed professionals that craft well researched arguments. Yes, statistically the West Bank barrier has greatly reduced the number of attacks by Palestinian militants, but at the same time, organizations like Electronic Intifada also employ and educated professionals who exercise their right to free speech and present their counterpoints. It was in 2003 that an incident at Concordia University occurred; a group of pro-Israel students scheduled Israeli politician Benjamin Netanyahu to speak at their university. In response, pro-Palestinian students rioted. Riot police had to be called in and there was property damage. The end result was that Netanyahu’s planned speech was cancelled. Last week Mahmoud Ahmadinejad spoke in front of the UN General Assembly and last year the Iranian politician spoke at Columbia University. Whenever Ahmadinejad comes to the US, it’s common for vocal

and physical protests to form around his presence. These protestors, who usually rally against Ahmadinejad’s anti-Zionist views, have a right to voice their opinions. But if they ever were to prevent the president of Iran from speaking, they would be just as bad as the Concordia rioters. All I am asking for is that these Zionists admit that an Israeli like

ing Israel marks it as a beacon of democracy in the Middle East. Israel is so into fairness that the country’s supreme court even questioned the legality of the West Bank Barrier. “In June 2004 the Court ruled that a 30-km section of barrier northwest of Jerusalem imposed undue hardship on Palestinians and must be rerouted,” says a 2005 article

Netanyahu, a member of the rightwing Likud party, is a controversial figure. But so many American Zionists have such blind support of Israel that they neglect any sources of contention within The Jewish State. One of the reasons why there is no solution to the Israel-Palestine conflict is because of internal Israeli politics. I’ve been to Israel twice, and I can say with confidence that Israeli citizens don’t blindly support Israel. Israelis are educated voters living in a democratic state. One of the many true arguments I have been told favor-

written by the BBC. In 60 years Israelis have built a nation that can afford to construct a physical barrier around a territory the size of Delaware. Israel and its supporters can bear the expense of sending every Jewish person between the ages of 18 and 26 to Israel for ten days. Yet American Zionists still claim Israel as a victim. And rightfully so. Israeli civilians have fell victim to rocket attacks, suicide bombings and wackjobs with bulldozers. In response, Israel exercised it’s right to defend itself. As a result of this ongoing war, a number of

Israeli soldiers ended up as hostages. I don’t know the exact number of hostages, but I do know there are numerous Facebook groups that call for their release. What I can tell you is that the ratio of Israeli hostages to Arab prisoners of war is skewed in Israel’s favor. In 2007, as Zionists called for the release of two Israeli soldiers, there were hundreds of Arab prisoners in Israeli prisons. Ehud Goldwasser and Elad Regev did not deserve to die as hostages. God knows I’d rather be in an Israeli prison then a Hezbollah one. Israel is at war, and in war people get hurt. From the best of my knowledge, I can say that Israel has never lost a war. It’s probably because if they did, the Jewish State wouldn’t exist anymore. So you’re welcome. While you American Zionists have your delusional view of what Israel is, next summer I’m going to be over there, watching ultra orthodox Jews from Jerusalem clash with bikini clad Israelis living in Tel Aviv. So much for unity in standing with Israel. On TV I’ll watch members of the Labor party argue with Likud politicians over what to do with the West Bank. I’ll risk death by taking the bus to work. Many people over there won’t like me. Perhaps I’ll be really controversial and visit a West Bank settlement. But to even it out, I’ll make sure I pee on a walled section of the West Bank Barrier. Oh yeah, the author feels that both Obama and McCain are subordinated into blindly supporting Israel.

is page is dedicated to e Man of Steel: Josef Stalin! Don’t let the silly Americans fool you. It was this great leader who truly defeated Hitler. By capturing Berlin and half of Europe, he set the stage for the Golden Years of the Soviet Union. We salute you, Man of Steel!

“A” “Communist” “Freshmen’s” “Survival” “Guide” “to” “Stony” “Brook” By “Andrew” “Fraley”

“Welcome to Stony Brook University.” “You are about to embark” on a long and “arduous journey” through the “social strata of this capitalist education system.” You “are” all equal, but some of you are “more”— “or less”—equal “than” others. “Some of you are stupid capitalist pig dogs.” If you “endure for the honor and glory of this” great Party, “overcome the trials and tribulations of this stifling system in which you’ve been placed and make the correct choices between hard work and harder work, chances are you’ll be a successful party member, and a positive contribution to the” magnificent Soviet Union. “Some of you won’t, simply because you’ll be too busy snorting cocaine and” oppressing the proletariat. “However, there is one more large and important obstacle that you must deal with in your quest for intellectual superiority. This is the extreme, pervasive free market sentiment that permeates through every pore of this beautiful campus.” “Welcome to a fortified” “bastion of capitalist thought, not-so-new freshmen.” “As” a “senior, I have seen this awful oppressive ideology that runs through the very fibers of this institution. Hell, through the very core of this damn country! I have had to deal with the entrepreneurial commentary of these mindless capitalist professors, who day in and day out condemn the” Marxists, Bolsheviks “and anyone who believes different than they, and the other Reaganite faculty, do.” I have listened to “Professor” “Hang” “Aircornor” in his Making Money and Oppressing the Masses class bash the

Stalin regime, demean the peace effort and ridicule Marxists for an entire lecture. “I have endured the drivel of another guy who totally exists, named Dave or something, ridicule” General Secretary Stalin “for denying a Soviet holocaust and saying that using a flamethrower to put out a forest fire was like fighting fire with fire.” “The stories from my co-eds about the constant ridicule we Marxist fundamentalists receive when they try to speak their mind about a regime that fell nearly twenty years ago still remain in my enormous, superior mind.” “You want to talk torture?” “Try listening to the philistines from journalism 101 bullshit about the purpose of journalism. Watchdogs of the government?” “Independent?” “Objective? These ass backwards capitalists have it all wrong, dammit!” “Journalism is here to be the mouthpiece of the government. If they’re not spreading propaganda, manipulating information and ultimately controlling the masses,” then journalists aren’t “doing their job properly.” “You know those I’d Rather Be bumper sticker? Well, when it comes to Journalism 101, I’d rather be torturing some poor, innocent Moslem.” “How do you survive constantly being surrounded by people who are less equal than you are? Besides flaunting your smug self satisfaction” “over them, here are a few strategies to remember during your time in this capitalist stink hole:” Have crappy “layout.” “If it looks shitty on print, it’s bound to get the attention of people who would otherwise pay your message no mind.” “Don’t justify text, have stupid looking lists and print inconsistently as well. This way, you keep your readership on

their toes. They’ll respect your message all the more.” “Location,” location, “location:” do not, “under any circumstances, associate with anyone who might disagree with you. Remember that universities in America are a haven of capitalists and free marketers. Where do you think those little bastards fled during the Cold War? To academia and Hollywood, of course! And to almost everywhere else in America, and most of the world. Just don’t associate with anybody who doesn’t profess himself a lock-and-step Marxist.” “Surround yourself with the right folks: join the Oppressive Marxist Orthodoxy. Hell, join The Comrade, a sister organization of the slightly less radical Press. I’d suggest using Facebook to find similar minded peers, but we denounce Facebook as a capitalist mind control device. Feel free to befriend people of all political stripes, but only to gather vital information on them. Remember, when the revolution comes, they will be first against the wall.” “Speak up in class.” Tell other professors and students that they’re wrong. Lord your superiority over them, “because you are better than them”—more equal, rather. “Don’t ever let those dumb fucks forget it.” “Treat your time here like you are at war. That’s what I do. Make it into a war game. Run around pretending to throw Molotov Cocktails into the faces of every capitalist pig dog you meet. And, for the sake of every word that I am about to misuse (like cleanly), avoid the Enduring Freedom Alliance and their associates. They’re rich and white and I assume they’re probably assholes or something. They’re also wrong about everything, just trust me

23

on this, so don’t bother with them cause they’re stupid.” “Don’t get angry.” “I’ll be frank, I fucking hate capitalists. They make me want to vomit all over their fancy clothes. I have a conniption every time I catch sight of the slimy shits. Don’t be like me. I’m brutally insane. Bask in your own self righteousness.” “Nothing anybody says is going to change” the fact that you are more equal “than” everybody. Have fun “with” them. “The capitalists are guilty of everything, from petty theft to murder in the first. Although it is hard not to explode in fits of rage every time one of the bastards does something that disagrees with your ideology.” “Try not to have rational dialogues with them. Play passive aggressive mind games with them. Don’t argue or debate with them, just stew over everything they say, and then write vitriolic opinion pieces about it in lackluster college publications. Just remember, you are smart. Just keep saying it.” “Follow these rules as faithfully as you can, and you will be a great communist. The overwhelming capitalist majority will try to persuade you that money is good, and free market isn’t a viciously oppressive system. They’ll throw around words like Tolerance, Dialogue, Freedom, Awareness, Rationality and all that other doublespeak for Anti-Marxist thought.” Ever since that bastard “Ronald” “Reagan” single handedly “destroyed” communism in the “‘80s,” capitalism has been on the “rise throughout the world.” We are with you in our neverending struggle to bring down this corrupt system. Stand strong. Never give in.

is page is dedicated to e Chariman: Mao Zedong Chairman Mao is the father of Communism in China. By winning the Civil War in the 1940’s, he ensured that the Communism will sit atop the world soon when China takes its place as the most powerful nation in the world!

We have a joke for you:

Man 1: Knock knock Man 2: Who’s there? Man 1: September 11th Man 2: September 11th who? Man 1: I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU’D NEVER FORGET!?!? We always see the bumper stickers saying “9/11: Never Forget!” Well, we think it’s a safe bet that anyone who lived through that fateful Tuesday would never actually forget the momentous events that occurred, so you can all knock it off with that crap. However, that’s now the point we want to make here. What we really want to do is take this time to remember some of the other major moments in our great Motherland’s history! No more of this capitalist pig, American nonsense. We remember the Battle of Stalingrad, when our glorious forces beat back the Fascist invaders in the biggest battle in all of mankind’s history. We remember the Siege of Leningrad, when millions of our citizens starved to death in the name of the worker’s greater struggle! We remember the launching of Sputnik and the look on American President Eisenhower’s face as he crapped his pants after hearing the news. Since it is now October, we remember the Glorious October Revolution of 1917 when our forces struck a blow for workers worldwide and overthrew the oppressive Czars! Finally, on a more somber note, we remember Ethel Rosenberg, whose birthday just passed on September 28. It was her and Julius Rosenberg who leveled the playing field by giving our great leader Stalin the atomic bomb information from the capitalists in the USA. She was unjustly executed shortly after. Rest in peace, Ethel. We will never forget!

Никогда не забывайте

Arts & Entertainment

The Stony Brook Press

25

arts&entertainment

My Bloody Valentine: Live, 9/22/08 By Steve McLinden

Thank God that My Bloody Valentine is back, in whatever form we could get them. Troubled by the fact that he could never write an album as great as 1991’s shoegaze masterpiece, Loveless, Kevin Shields has said he went crazy writing new material in the mid-‘90s. Shields says he “went crazy,” the band broke up, and while the members moved on to collaborate with other rock artists, the future seemed hopeless for a decade or so. That is, until 2007, when Shields began saying things like he was personally remastering the bands two full-length albums, that they would be playing live shows, and that there would definitely be a new album someday. For kids like me, who would’ve been more likely to be seen in kindergarten before I was in an all-ages show back in the band’s heyday, My Bloody Valentine’s stop in New York for two shows on September 22 and 23 were dreams come true. After curating the All Tomorrow’s Parties festival upstate in Monticello on the weekend prior, a three-day-long odyssey of really loud rock music featuring the likes of Built to Spill, Mogwai, Trail of Dead and plenty more that would take up too much of this page to list, My Bloody Valentine headed downstate to play at Roseland Ballroom in midtown Manhattan for these two nights, the first of which I attended. The first opener, Le Volume

Courbe, was interesting, but I didn’t particularly enjoy them. The singer, Charlotte Marionneau, had a certain uniquely insecure-sounding voice that I think was supposed to add to the freak-folk element. She is a French expatriate in London, and rumored on the Internet to be Kevin Shields’ girlfriend. (Well, thank you, spoils system.) The acoustic guitarist played his depressing minor chords adequately, and I think the violinist who doubled on xylophone (a xylophone that they had the technicians spend ten minutes setting up just perfectly) turned out to be a little unnecessary. Following that half-hour set, we were treated to a set by The Wounded Knees, which is coincidentally fronted by Kevin Shields’ brother Jimi. We could tell of his relation to Kevin by the way he complained to the sound guys about the levels in a monitor after every single song. They would’ve been more enjoyable if not for the focus on the flutist—yes, a girl playing an amplified flute was made central to most of the band’s songs. At the end of the show, J Mascis of Dinosaur Jr came out with electric guitar to join them. Much of the crowd had no idea who he was, and it doesn’t help that he is the most unsociable man in rock and roll, but to be fair, J Mascis is a man who needs no introduction. If you ever see an aging man these days with near-white hair almost to his waist wearing an Adidas track jacket and an electric guitar hanging from his shoulder, it’s probably J. (But don’t bother telling him you’re a

This, however, is the band. My bloody something or other.

fan, because you’ll probably just creep him out.) Unfortunately, it was not a Dinosaur Jr song that he joined them for, just some Middle-Eastern-influenced eightminute jam with lots and lots of flute. Shortly after ten o’clock, My Bloody Valentine came to the stage. I took my earplugs out at this point because I’m so hardcore. There were stations all around the entrance to the venue with boxes of free earplugs and signs like, “YOU WILL NEED THESE,” or “MBV RECOMMED [sic] USING EARPLUGS.” In the early ‘90s, they had a reputation for turning their monitors away from themselves, just to blast out the eardrums of the crowd even more. While we didn’t get any of that these days, they were still pretty damn loud. My This, actually, has nothing to do with the band Bloody Valentine always had a reputation for not varying up their setlist, and what we got was almost sounded like a rocket launch, and I figexactly the same as what they played ured that I should put my earplugs in if when opening the reunion tour in Glas- I wanted the ringing to go away before gow in June or at either of the other the end of September. Looking around, shows in the state of New York. It was about a quarter of the crowd was forcmostly a mix of their more powerful ing their fingers into their ears to drive tracks from Loveless, Isn’t Anything, and the earplugs deeper, while another the You Made Me Realise EP; there are quarter raised their hands like thrill no deep tracks from their earlier more seekers on a roller coaster or worshipgoth-sounding recordings. Opening pers at the altar of wall of sound. By the with “I Only Said” into “When You end, even Kevin Shields had had Sleep” was no doubt the only choice that enough, warning drummer Colm Ó Cíosóig to stop playing already. The could be made. The vocals could’ve been louder band went into the last verse of “You (but then again, people say that about Made Me Realise” which most of us Loveless), but guitarist/female vocalist probably couldn’t recognize after havBilinda Butcher’s voice sounded as ing our ears beat up, and shortly theredreamily wonderful as it did almost after, they waved goodbye and left the twenty years ago. The greatest sight of stage to return without an encore. Any false hopes of them previewing the night was the way that bassist Debbie Googe fought like the bass was a a new song were dashed. In the week to follow these New York shows, My beast to be tamed. Bloody Valentine wrapped up their After an hour or so, I began to say to myself, “I’ve been to louder shows dates in North America and the tour, than this. I’ve leaned on guitar monitors for now. The remaster of Isn’t Anything, at noise rock shows. I’ll only have tinni- the band’s first album was scheduled for th tus for a couple of days.” Seeing as there release on September 29 , and from was a disappointing barricade to keep what I heard of it, it did not consist of us no less than twenty feet from the blasphemous alterations like many fans stage and the crowd had gotten their feared. Reportedly, the Loveless remaseven earlier than I, distance had to do a ter is being held up by Kevin’s rewriting of the liner notes. Both albums had little bit to save my hearing. That is, until “You Made Me Re- been scheduled for a June release to prealise” descended into the heaviest cede all of this touring. With any luck, twenty-minute sound vacuum I had we will be getting a new My Bloody ever heard. At first, it felt like we were Valentine album within a couple of on board a rocket launch; a feeling so years, the band will tour again, and they out-of-this-world. After about three or will get a chance to abuse my eardrums four minutes, I realized that it only once more.

26 Arts & Entertainment

Vol. XXX, Issue 2 | Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Bayside’s Shudder By Vincent Barone

Long Island’s own pop punk band Bayside is set to release their fourth full length album, Shudder on September 30. The CD opens powerfully with the track “Boy”, which, unfortunately, is one of the hardest-hitting songs on the album. Shudder is filled with morbidly well-written lyrics that longtime fans are familiar with, but it lacks the intensity of the band’s prior works. The somber words are hidden under catchy hooks that send out a more upbeat, “poppier” vibe that dulls the sharp tone of previous recordings. They will unquestionably attract many new fans, but could leave a bitter taste in the mouths of fans from the band’s early days. As far as instrumentals go, this is the band’s most talented effort yet. Lead guitarist Jack O’Shea doesn’t let his band’s genre stifle his guitar expertise and has done his best playing on Shudder. O’Shea has done a great job playing over the rhythm, making it impossible for songs to grow boring. Besides his creative licks, Jack laid down some serious soloing on tracks like “A Call To Arms”, “Have Fun Storming The Castle”,

What kind of doofus wears a keffiyeh with a short sleeved shirt?

and “Roshambo.” His guitar tracks, mixed with singer Anthony Raneri’s unique vocal styling sets Bayside apart from the other generic pop punk bands and is a breath of fresh air in a ridiculously watered down, monotonous genre.

Drummer Chris Guglielmo has done another great job in his sophomore effort replacing former drummer, John “Beatz” Holohan. Chris had big shoes to fill and he continues his great job by taking John’s style of playing and tweaking it to make the beats his own.

His drum prowess is evident on tracks like “Howard” and “Have Fun Storming the Castle” where he plays unique beats that complement the guitar work. As much as I miss the angst and power from former Bayside CDs, I have to admit that Shudder is still a solid effort from the group. From tracks one to twelve, there are no fillers. Each song is as good as the last. Anthony Raneri’s vocals have always been the biggest key to the band’s success. He has displayed his songwriting expertise by perfectly blending despair and optimism. His songs usually deal with a battle with heartbreak or uncertainty and how he perseveres. They might have steered a little from their roots, but there are still a few tracks that remind me of their early work. My favorite ones include; “Boy”, “The Ghost of Saint Valentine”, and “Roshambo.” If you are new to Bayide and are a fan of Alkaline Trio, From First to Last, and Silverstein, you will be in for a treat. Shudder is in Stores September 30th.

The Stony Brook Press

27

arts&entertainment

Metallica – Death Magnetic By Aamer Qureshi

Anyone will tell you that Metallica’s grand trilogy of thrash-metal albums in the 80’s were their best ever. These were 1984’s Ride The Lightning, 1986’s Master of Puppets and 1988’s …And Justice For All. Everything starting with their 1991 self-titled album, and most successful release, is a subject of much debate. As far as their image goes, taking on Napster in the early 2000’s made them one of the most hated bands around. Their previous album was lambasted by nearly everyone who heard for, simply put, crappy production and songs which milked a riff for eight odd minutes. Most aggravating of all, the lead guitarist was chained up and there wasn’t a single guitar solo on the album. Five years after St. Anger, Metallica is a band invigorated from mended personal ties and years of touring. Anyone who’s been keeping up with their set lists in recent years will see an almost complete eviction of new material and a return to playing their classics - complex material with time changes and played in their entirety. It was in this spirit, of embracing what made Metallica so incredible in their angered youth, that producer Rick Rubin advised them to try to create a sequel to Master of Puppets. Of course, Metallica were different people back then. Dubbed “Alcoholica” by the mainstream media for their hard partying lifestyle, they released a set of albums so brilliant and soul-crushingly angry, that it’s hard not to yearn for the old days to return. Sadly, any realist will tell you that this just cannot happen. With an average age of 45, Metallica are now family men and have spent over ten years recreating their sound and becoming more of a hard rock group. So for them to try to return to their roots on Death Magnetic is a staggering proposal, but not surprising from a producer known to push bands into doing what they do best. The songs on Death Magnetic, for

those wondering, are really complicated. The jarringly superb guitar riffs, courtesy of mastermind James Hetfield, invigorate the songs with the punch that Metallica were known for. The album opener, “That Was Just Your Life,” begins with a heartbeat ala Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon and moves into a harmonized clean guitar intro. This was a point of excitement for me, as it indicated a return to Metallica’s seminal album format. The first song from the classic trilogy begins with clean and harmonized guitars. And, in staying true to their legacy, the song launches into ferociousness and then into solo.

It’s hard to think of a better way to begin the album. The next two songs continue Metallica’s sonic assault on the senses with powerful and merciless riffing. It is at this point that I must curse every human being’s biological clock. Although they retain the stamina to play extremely fast and intricate riffs, Hetfield’s much-celebrated old growling and roaring vocals have gone away – never to return. It is in realizing this and moving on that one can truly appreciate the effort he puts in and makes do with what he has. This is shown clearly

on the fourth song and first single “The Day That Never Comes.” True to their format, it’s a ballad placed fourth in the track listing and echoes their classics “One” and “Fade To Black,” maybe even a bit too much. But stands up as a damn good song regardless. When addressing lyrics, Hetfield’s abstract and disjointed take on this album is at times quite hilarious. A line repeated in “Broken, Beat and Scarred” a lot is, “What don’t kill ya make ya more strong” - sure to become an injoke with any Metallica fan. However, as odd as the lyrics may sound, the music makes up for them. The eastern-tinged and mid-tempo “Cyanide” follows the rage-filled “All Nightmare Long,” which is silly only in title. “The Unforgiven III,” a sequel to two of Metallica’s most celebrated ballads from the 90’s, was a complete surprise. While the first two shared some music and lyrics to create a story, this one did away with it all. At first I was disappointed, not understanding how it worked in the grand scheme of a possible song trilogy. After some listens though, you can appreciate how it stands on its own as a really good ballad – the final one on Death Magnetic. Nothing could have prepared me for the next song, titled “The Judas Kiss.” A sing-song chorus, bended main riff and an incredibly sinister solo make this one of the high points of the album for sure. It’s a song that will definitely be a live favorite and, to put it simply, gets in your head and stays there. Now, the highly awaited second to last song is the instrumental, titled “Suicide and Redemption.” This song truly marks a return of Metallica to their music-intensive old days. The listener is attacked with riff after riff, which segues into a slower and softer middle section. Each melody on this song sounds highly emotional in nature and seems to signify a feeling of mood changes. It goes from angry, to sad, to triumphant, to eerie and ultimately returns back to the original riff. Fans who missed the lack of a customary instrumental since 1991’s self-titled album will rejoice.

The last song, titled “My Apocalypse,” is such a classically Metallica way to end an album that it makes you smile. While most bands would have their saddest and most melodious song as the album closer – Metallica pile it on with a seedy and heavy thrasher. The shortest song on the album (clocking in at 5:01) recalls everything from their early days to Slayer, as Hetfield sounds a lot like Araya in his vocals. A real return to form and an immensely enjoyable listen, Death Magnetic successfully captures what Metallica and Rubin wanted for the release. However, it has some major flaws. The production on the album is brick walled to the point where it clips. As an audiophile, I was lamenting the lack of dynamics in the songs until I came across an ironic discovery. Before sending the album to their mixing and mastering department, who royally fucked it up – they sent the unedited master tapes to Guitar Hero headquarters. The creators of the massively popular video game created their own superior mix of the album, which is now one of the most downloaded items on the Internet. When you see me with my iPod, it’s this mix that I’m listening to with a clear conscience, as I’ve bought the album itself. Labeled by Metallica as the album which belongs in between 1988’s Justice and their 1991 self-titled album, Death Magnetic has some of their most intricate songwriting ever. The simplicity since 1991 is gone, to be replaced by numerous time changes and breathtakingly complicated solos. Just ask anyone who plays Guitar Hero about this last detail. Who plays an actual guitar anymore? However, the retail version has the bass turned down – so it is indeed a sequel to ‘Justice.’ This isn’t a problem if you have the Guitar Hero version but it’s quite annoying, as Rob Trujillo’s a supremely talented bassist. So, difficult riffs, solos drenched in Hammett’s fetish (the wah-wah pedal), Lars’ simple (very simple) but visceral drumming and Hetfield’s vocals make this a true Metallica release. I give it four out of five stars.

28 Arts & Entertainment

Vol. XXX, Issue 2 | Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Mega Man 9: Throwbacks & “Fuck You” By Kevin Vong

Capcom released Mega Man 9 this week on all current generation consoles and brought back some 8-bit flavor in

this generation of high-definition gaming. Old-school graphics and sound bites in this day and age? You betcha. It is certainly not a glossy-looking action game like “Devil May Cry” or “Ninja Gaiden.” In this installment of the series, the evil Dr. Wily frames Dr. Light, creator of Mega Man, for corrupting robots and it is up to the Blue Bomber to free Light and put an end to Wily’s schemes. Like every other Mega Man game, you’ll have to go through difficult stages and destroy robot masters to beat the game. The question is “How hard can it be?” Well, you’ll have to perform pixelperfect jumps, dodge multiple enemies and projectiles, avoid pits and spikes aboard a mov-

ing platform, and read bosses’ patterns. There’s hardly any room for error. Sounds unfair? It is, but it’s not the game’s fault when the Blue Bomber dies… it’s all you. It’s hard to believe this game was made this year. The game looks and feels like a NES game. I was playing it on my HDTV through HDMI source with 16:9 resolution… it doesn’t even support 16:9 and converts to 4:3 resolution. It even added the feature of making the screen flicker to enhance the old-school feel. The controls are simple: move back and forth, jump, and shoot. Some of the old-school programming is still at work, such as having only three enemies appear on the screen at one time. Why is Mega Man 9 significant? It doesn’t hold people’s hands and guide them through the game to bring an ac-

cessible experience like most action games in this high-definition generation. This game encourages masochism from the minute you start to the minute you finish. Oh, the nostalgia of the retardedly-hard 8-bit era.

Next On The List To Schindler’s List By Jie Jenny Zou

Nestled between the Wang Center and the Melville Library lies Stony Brook’s very own Staller Center. Unbeknownst to many students is the fact that for twenty dollars, one can purchase a season pass to view their weekly Friday offerings. Aside from their ultradark theaters (I mean can’t-see-thestranger-sitting-next-to-you-damn-this -place-is-darrrrk kind of dark), cinema buffs will also enjoy their diverse array of indie films from “Flight of the Red Balloon” to last spring’s “My Father, My Lord” — all showcased on generously sized (this means rather large) screens. Be forewarned though, Staller caters to a much older crowd, so I hope you like/can endure the smell of Bengay. For this particular night, I arrived at the packed theater for a 7 pm curtain of Die Falscher or, for those of you unfamiliar with German, The Counterfeiter(s). Yes, German. This is one of those “reading” films. Written and directed by Stefan Ruzowitzky, The Counterfeiters is based on a memoir of the same name by Adolf Burger, a Jewish Slovak interned in the currency counterfeiting campaign during the Holocaust. The film version, however, forgoes focusing on the Resistancetouting Adolf Burger and instead

chooses the much less moral, ambivalent Salomon “Sally” Sorowitsch as the main character. Played with understated brilliance by Austrian actor Karl Markovics, Sally is the kind of guy that thinks the best way to earn money is to, literally, make it. A master counterfeiter and businessman, Sally is a hedonist with an obscure past who momentarily

Bounced from camp to camp, Sally soars to the top of ‘Holocaust prisoners that sell their souls’ when he utilizes his art skills to paint flattering portraits of Nazi soldiers and their families as well as Nazi-endorsing murals on camp buildings. In a stroke of irony, Sally finds himself in an unlikely position when he is put in charge of a secret cur-

escapes internment from the Nazis by falsifying passports. He is able to lend his special skills for others willing to pay a price. Eventually, he finds himself arrested and interned at the hands of police officer Friedrich Herzog who reveals and breaks his forgery ring.

rency counterfeiting operation by none other than top Nazi, Friedrich Herzog. In an act of ‘Nazi altruism’ Herzog thanks Sally for the promotion he received as a result of handing over Germany’s “King of Forgers” (think Nazi from “The Pianist”). The currency operation is as controversial and polariz-

ing as Sally himself; proclaimed by the film as history’s largest scale counterfeit ring, it is said to have produced nearly $100 million for the Nazis. Tensions flare among the prisoners of the operation who battle with the self-realization of their privileged positions as well as their fundamental role in continuing the Nazi’s reign of terror. There are some truly heart-breaking moments in this film but the excellent pacing does well to not linger on any particular scene for too long. It’s not much of a shocker-type movie; you don’t necessarily watch to see what happens to Sally, but rather what he does. His character, filled with flaws and a sardonic sense of humor, is what makes this film more humanizing and interesting to watch than other Holocaust films. Great supporting roles all around, especially with Sally’s surrogate son character, Kolya, (Sebastian Urzendowsky) and the antagonistic Adolf Burger (August Diehl). With it’s grainy film, minimal color saturation, and “400 Blows”-esque beach shots, it’s easy to get entranced in this beautiful and poetic piece. It’s also no surprise that this film took top honors in the Foreign Film category at last year’s Oscars for Best Foreign Language Film. That being said, put on your reading glasses and go watch this film. This is one film that even subtitles can’t kill.

The Stony Brook Press

29

30

Vol. XXX, Issue 2 | Wednesday, October 1, 2008

The Poet’s Gallery Untitled

By Samantha Monteleone soft, cool

sheep’s wool.

Phantom Walls

By Samantha Monteleone

Hypothetically speaking, I’m watching

you

Watching them

shroud me whole. Watch other people’s lives In which they’ll never exist tense, new

Joyride

of the sky doesn’t care how tall

Let’s drive down to the vast pink-

vast count of melodies and

By Alana S.

and-blue upstairs

Where everyone seems to think

of how significantly small the

rainbow.

What’s more interesting is how they

sundial.

It’s reflecting soft and sarcastically

Each and every time I twinge.

The amplified plastic stings

Spurts of pleasant dusty nail-

lie with me. weak smile let us be.

Where the director of my docu-

watch it

And I watch myself slide towards

Through your eyes I can see They feed off of each other

Feeding off the false

Through my phantom walls.

It was almost as if they could touch me

Watching them through your mirror

The reflection ripples and fades

mentary continually replays and

rewinds,

the wrong direction.

Forget you, forget you, drive away into

biting stretches of blank pavement,

Yes, every footstep is another memory spotless and clean.

As your smile turns to interest

Yes, my heartbeat is not to be

I can feel my skin growing old

While my unplanned blinking

Ingest, digest.

I can’t believe it, is my seeker sold?

I don’t like this station much

I do think I’ll retire

I change the channel

And can’t believe I’m inspired.

My travels have taught me the

where I stomach-ache mistakes,

Let’s drive backwards and see

volt

It’s just a box

paintings of praise…

Universe and Beyond,

to go

Contribute, distribute, insult OR re-

light show

Because you’ll never reach its

about but no one seems to want

mourn dew.

dark as coal.

you are,

trusted as it goes with the flow of things,

And by Beyond I mean too little

that I am behind in my knowledge Universe is.

Driving only takes me too far from identity crisis’s,

Of belonging to 2 people in the same day,

Of a flashback of a haunted

house, too dark and forgiving for a

Jaded girl like me to be startled, because my mind changes with

the

Polluted orange sunset on a

horizon I never meant to choose. I am driving through my own headache’s memories

Some things should just wait for November to come…

eyes take in as much honesty as

Let’s wish and hope and dream

my hair.

can’t cast a shadow on my re-

possible,

And oh! how I hate the wind in

Accept and forget, and the pink

of next month’s dismay

And drive when even the sunset

grets…

31

The Stony Brook Press

Submit Your Comics or Poems To: [email protected]

Go For It, Man!

I’m so depressed, I don’t know what to do...

Black to move, kill Whitey!

Go Club meets every Tuesday and Thursday at 7pm in the Library Commuter Lounge

I know FDR, and you’re no FDR

By Andrew Fraley

32

Vol. XXX, Issue 2 | Wednesday, October 1, 2008

opinion

Ask a Lesbian By Ilyssa Fuchs Dear Ilyssa, After reading your article last week on Obama and McCain’s policies towards gays and lesbians I was surprised to see that you never mentioned Ralph Nader as a candidate or any of his policies toward the gay community. As a gay independent who is still unsure about whom I am voting for, I would appreciate if you could discuss his policies so I have a full picture of the policies of all three candidates. Thanks so much.

couples. Furthermore, Nader opposes a constitutional amendment to ban same-sex marriage and same-sex unions and believes that same-sex unions are a step in the right direction, but are only a starting point because they do not actually afford same-sex couples all the rights that marriage does. Moreover, Nader believes that everyone should have equal protection

under the law regardless of their sexual orientation and says that, “the only way to ensure full equal rights is to recognize same-sex marriage.” I personally believe that Nader’s policies regarding the gay and lesbian community are positive, but as we all know it is highly unlikely that a third party candidate will be elected. It is in my opinion that anyone who believes in Nader’s policies

should vote for Obama rather than McCain, or just vote for Nader himself. Hope that clears things up. Sincerely, Ilyssa Fuchs (Special thanks to www.votenader.org for the information obtained for this article)

Sincerely, Still Straddling the Fence

Dear Still Straddling, I appreciate your concern that I did not look at all the candidate’s policies. I agree with you that in order to give voters the full picture of all the candidates, one must start by including all the candidates and their policies regarding all issues, but in this case issues that directly affect the gay community. After doing a little research I am now able to provide you with the facts behind Nader’s policies. Nader, like Obama, supports equal rights for gays and lesbians as well as equal rights for same-sex

Nader confesses his sad panda love for the gay community to his parrot, Cardozo

Aike-y Breaky Heart By Anthony Murisco

Tuesday, September 23, 2008, is a day when many dreams were shattered. In a cover story for People magazine, American Idol Season 2 runner-up Clay Aiken announced that he was a homosexual. Aer years of insults by Kathy Griffin, rumors, tabloid exposes (including an online sex scandal with a former US Marine) Clay finally felt that now, with the birth of his baby son with his best friend, music producer Jaymes Foster, it was time to break the silence. Born in North Carolina and raised Southern Baptist, Clay always shied away from speculation on his sexuality. As per the Baptist beliefs, homosexuals are condemned; in the People issue Clay goes on to say in his hometown when you realized you were gay “you either

And I came out of the closet...

hid it or couldn’t hide it..” Since 2003, the year of his Idol debut, with his strong and powerful voice and upliing tunes, he became a spokesman for Christianity. He even appeared in Christian Music Planet as the “American Idol Christian”. Fans, usually women, gravitated to his “aw-shucks”, old-fashioned boy personality, and adopted the nickname “Claymates”. ese fans were always the first to defend Aiken when he came under attack. Having never spoken publicly about this, the message boards over at Claymaniacs.com were divided. To some, Clay is still the same old Clay; user GWENN, a woman with an avatar of her and her ideal man had this to say, “Gay – So what? e man is drop dead gorgeous.” Others debate how he could claim to be a Christian and a homosexual. User Diane on AikenForums.com puts it, “sorry, the Bible says homosexuality

is wrong, and as a Christian I believe that. We can't just follow the parts of the Bible that we want or that are convenient to us, or we are not Christians. And he says he's a Christian. Too bad, I was supporting him since 2003." Some have gone as far as decoding his previous antics, such as user HavinaClayAffair who began to question men who have been in and out of Clay’s life throughout his career, “Where did his best bud and high school friend take off to. We heard an explanation of some sort. I remember reading it… he just sort of worked for Clay- then disappeared...” What effect will this have on the mold created by Clay? As one fan, user WilsonClaymate on the Claymaniacs forum puts it, “I love Clay Aiken unconditionally and I’m here for the long hall.”

Opinion

The Stony Brook Press

33

An Old Racist Remembers Coney Island... By Ross Barkan

Holy shit, I’m old and angry. You have no fucking idea. What? Cooney what? Shut the fuck up, Jeremy, I don’t want any ice cream. Fuck. Lemme tell you young shitdicks something. If I ever catch you goddamn ice wagonasses on my fucking lawn I swear to God I will get the fuck off my Hoveraround and smack the shit out of you with my ox cane. I fucking will, don’t press me. What, Jeremy, Islands? Yeah there should be a place to put the blacks. Stealing my damn medicine. Oh, Coney Island! Thanks, limpdick, next time, don’t whisper like a shit-eating little girl. Get a paper cone and yell that garbage. Yeah, I got memories. Fuck, I lost my virginity on the Cyclone back in ’19. Some hot fucking broad she was, I think I was twelve at the time, and I Jack Dempsey-ed her

his truck of shit in the nearest outhouse. Good times. Lemme tell you, and if you couldn’t shit, Coney Island had this great enema booth for a nickel. A nickel! at was just aer the Great War when the people were friendly and you could get a tube shoved up your ass with a smile. Jeremy, by the way, I’m gonna need another enema in an hour, so quit playing with your dick and come take off my pants. In my day, Coney Island was a man’s park. Not this rinky-dinky, namby-pampy, sissy-wissy, lollipopfucking amusement shithole they closed down a few weeks ago. No! ere were wooden horses and real cotton candy. You young assrabbits ever ate fucking cotton with sugar? Grab a piece of cotton from your night shirt and just chew? Hell no, too busy with your Ebays and your musicmaphones and whatever the fuck else that assclown Herbert Hoover shits down your

Good times.

ass into the ground. ose were the days. Back then, there weren’t any sissy politically correct fuckhead hippies with all their “rules.” A man could get a good under-aged fuck on the Cyclone. If his bowels were loose, like mine are every goddamn hour, he could dump

pants. Alfred Smith will be the next president of the United States if my name ain’t…fuck I can’t remember. Back in the 20’s people swam in fucking real bathing suits. If rubber one pieces didn’t get the ladies wet, nothing would. I fucked Marilyn Monroe’s

Look at all those darkies

grandmother underneath the boardwalk. I nearly soiled my diapers just now thinking ‘bout that. I remember the time Yankee center fielder Earle Combs came down to Coney Island. He was my favorite because he really hated the blacks. ose were the days. ey had Coney Island for the whites and Black Coney Island for them jangling, corncob good-for-nothin’…fuck I forgot where I was going with this again. Jeremy, I need a fucking towel. No, shitfor-tits, the yellow goddamn towel with the thick lining I sprung another leak. Goddamn that Hoover. Yes, them were the days when women and the minorities weren’t sassing about this and that. Just good angry white motherfuckers like me and enema booths, enema booths as far as the eye could see! ey had the moving pictures at Coney Island too. For a damn nickel you could see Chaplin and a kangaroo give Orson Wells a reach around. Moving pictures today are for shit, I tell you. Last week Jeremy, my good-for-nothing-except-for-maybesweeping-my-skin flakes grandson

BIG TIME LETTERS

took me to see a moving picture. It was all colors and flying shit and shapes and other random horeseball malarkey that I couldn’t follow if I was Kaiser Wilhelm shitting rainbow colored goats. Which reminds me, there were a few smelly Krauts in the front row and I told Jeremy to fetch me my liberty cabbage gun so I could blow those goat fuckers back to hell. Jeremy, who a woman wouldn’t fuck with a fishing pole, ignored me. Someday when they kick those whitish Cubans out of the Major Leagues and the horseless carriage breaks the impossible 30 mile per hour barrier, I hope to get the hell back to Coney Island. ere were some good times there. Beating up darkies, fucking broads, beating up darkies, moving pictures, darkies again, enemas…ah it makes an old man want to cry. If only they didn’t surgically remove my eyes last Christmas. ose were the days. Now get the fuck over to my Hoveraround Jeremy it’s a god damn shitstorm in my trousers.

MAKE BIG TIME PLAYS

IN BIG TIME SITUATIONS!

34 Sports

Vol. XXX, Issue 2 | Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Hofstra Beats SBU... By A Lot... Again By Matt Braunstein

On Friday, September 27, the Stony Brook men’s football team charged onto their home field with intensity and determination. It was a cold and misty night, and as usual their stadium was not nearly filled to capacity, but this did not deter them. This was quite possibly the biggest game of their season; a televised clash with our rival, the Hofstra Pride. The Seawolves received the opening kickoff and proceeded to march down the field under the leadership of freshman QB Dayne Hoffman and helped by some excellent running from junior RB Conte Cuttino. The offense shook off two penalties along the opening drive, and on a third and long Hoffman dropped back, pump faked, looked off his receivers, and threw a tight beautiful spiral to senior receiver Dwayne Eley in the end zone. The ball touched Eley’s hands, the crowd erupted in celebration, and then he dropped the touchdown pass. From that point on the game went downhill, and Seawolves went up shit creek. Hofstra beat SBU handily by a score of 43-3. As if a pounding like that wasn’t enough, it was the 12th time in row the Pride has beat SBU. Though the teams are considered rivals, the rivalry is a bit one sided as previous to this game, Hofstra had beat Stony Brook all eleven times the teams faced off. The worst loss came two years ago in a 55-0 trouncing, but this past week’s game wasn’t much better. The Seawolves scored on only one of

their eleven possessions throughout the course of the game, a field goal in the first half. The other ten times they punted, gave up possession on downs or simply turned the ball over. In total, the Seawolves offense amassed 72 rushing yards, 139 passing yards, and no touchdowns. It should be noted also that Hofstra did have male cheerleaders on the

DB Leslie Jackman. Snapping the ball was also a problem, perhaps caused by the light rain that persisted throughout the game. Both on special teams and in the shotgun formation, the ball was launched over the QB or punter’s head more than once, and resulted in a loss of yards and continued frustration.

Hostra is preparing to violate Stony Brook beyond the actual 41-3 score

sideline, so they also beat us in gayness. Though the offense showed it was more than capable when executed properly, they were plagued by mistakes from the start of the game. They made three penalties (all at crucial points in the game), threw two interceptions and lost two fumbles, one of which was returned sixty yards for a touchdown by Hofstra

Najib Aminy

Hofstra was not nearly as stagnant on offense, gaining 155 yards on the ground and 161 yards through the air, leading to a total of five touchdowns. They also kicked a field goal, returned a fumble for a touchdown and were able to convert eight of thirteen third downs. Stony Brook only converted three of eleven on their crucial downs.

This loss brings SBU’s record to 1-4 this season. However, all hope is not lost as the team still has not faced any of their conference opponents in the newly joined Big South division. The Seawolves also have an extra week of practice to regroup and prepare for a game at Liberty University on Oct. 11. The team this year is not untalented by any means. Though QB Hoffman is in his first year, he seems to have a grasp on the offense and shows poise in the pocket. RB Cuttino is as fast and hardhitting as ever, and now has a nice complement in freshman RB Edwin Gowins. Reliable senior WR Lynell Suggs was out with an injury for most of the game, but the team’s number two receiving threat, Eley, played well despite his early touchdown drop. He is a small, shifty receiver in the mold of the Panther’s Steve Smith, and has excellent hands. The offensive line remains as the team’s biggest strength, as they gave up no sacks to Hofstra and continue to do work in the trenches. They are a bulky and powerful squad anchored on the left side by senior LT and team captain Lawrence Lovell and massive senior LG Steve Council. The run defense is solid but the pass defense is a bit shaky, but there is no doubt that head coach Jim Priore will have the team working hard during practice to improve. So yes, Hofstra wiped up the floor with Stony Brook this past Friday, and yes it was the 12th time in a row they did it. But just remember, they have male cheerleaders and we don’t, and goddammit, that is something to be proud of.

Seawolves Futbol By Peter Langone

The Men’s Soccer team experienced another disappointing loss to Towson last Saturday in front of a big Stony Brook crowd. The large crowd, due to the Seawolves’ annual Alumni day, cheered throughout the whole game for a team that had stepped up their game but just couldn’t put the ball in the net. The team’s defense started off strong, not allowing the Towson offense to get off one shot. The sole goal of the game came in the 62nd minute by Towson’s forward Liam Maloney. This win was much needed to boost the seawolves’

morale, just before heading on a four game road trip beginning the following Monday against Marist. The Seawolves took many good shots, with a total of eleven for the game. Their inability to score was due to their lack of experience on the field. Coach Cesar Markovic played a freshman attack and midfield, which, although talented, were not able to finish off necessary plays to gain a lead. Junior James Palumbo subbed in late in the first half and began to give the offense the life it needed. He quickly took control of the game, distributing good balls and ripping a thirty yard shot, but was just barely blocked by Towson’s keeper. Palumbo left the game injured within the first fifteen minutes

Sports

The Stony Brook Press

of the second half due to a head injury incurred while trying to contest a header with one of Towson’s defensemen. The Seawolves were unable to match the intensity of a rough Towson team, who were playing very rough defense. The team was once again shut out for the second game in a row vs. Marist College. The team was plagued with injuries to most of its starters that occurred in both the last game and the rough practices their coach has been putting them through. Junior Mihailo Pavlisin took two great shots that were denied by the Marist keeper. Marist scored early in the 16th minute to give Marist a 1-0 lead. The ball hit off the cross bar and trickled into the goal. Heading to Ohio, the team had low expectations coming into the game

against Akron, their third ranked opponent this season. The 9th ranked team had a hard time against a Stony Brook team coming off a losing streak of three games. The defense played very physically against a strong offense that was expected to score more then just one goal. It came with nine seconds left in the second half by Steve Zakuani. Goalie Dawid Ditrich tallied three saves that kept the Seawolves tied for most of the game. Hopefully the men’s team can keep on their great play and momentum going into another tough match against 22nd ranked Duke on Tuesday September 20, ending their road game trip. Duke, powered by senior forward Mike Grella, will be a tough opponent for the men’s team. The men’s team is now 2-7-1, with most of their loses coming from non-

conference teams. Their next home game is against Boston University on Wednesday, October 20 at Lavalle Stadium.

35

Note: e Stony Brook Press wants you to remember that BIG TIME futbol players make BIG TIME futbol plays in...

BIG TIME FUTBOL SITUATIONS

NHL Preview By Daniel Offner

As time winds down and the fall comes ever closer, something draws slowly within reach… the 2008-2009 hockey season! The following is an indepth look at some of you favorite hockey teams and their prospects for the upcoming season: The New York Rangers: As the team dons their “Broadway Blues” to begin the new season some additions were made to the roster. Dale Weise, who was drafted fourth round in 2008, is currently on the starting roster and will probably be replaced by Lauri Korpikoski. Over the summer some major players were lost and some were gained. Key players such as Sean Avery (picked up by Dallas), Ryan Hollweg (picked up Toronto), Jaromir Jagr (went to play for Avangard Omsk in Russia), Martin Straka (retired and went to play for HC Lasselberger Plzen in the Czech Republic) and Brendan Shanahan (still an unrestricted free agent) were lost. However gained was Wade Redden, Nikolai Zherdev, Dan Fritsche, Aaron Voros, Patrick Rissmiller and Markus Naslund. Also in a recent preseason game ex-Ranger, Petr Nedved, has been playing and may potentially join the team. Prediction: The Rangers have an all-star team this year and have serious drive from last years’ playoffs against the Penguins. I predict this team will definitely make it to the postseason but the cup isn’t etched in stone. Grade AThe New York Islanders: The Islanders look prepared to redeem themselves from last year’s fiasco season in which the team finished thirteenth out

of fifteen teams in their conference. Kyle Okposo, the NY Islanders first round choice in 2006, has already been signed onto the starting roster. Also over the off-season the Islanders picked up veteran Doug Weight, and Mark Streit from Montreal. Prediction: The Islanders don’t have a good team however they have initiative. They have to pull themselves out of the slump they had last year in order to have any chance to make it to the playoffs. Grade CThe New Jersey Devils: Last year they were one of the best teams around and experienced one of the worst post seasons. However the Devils are prepared to recover—with full force. Bobby Holik, ex-Devil, has been re-signed to the team via free agency. With Brodeur between the pipes the season is almost guaranteed to be stirring. However, he is now 36 and there is always the possibility that he has hit his prime and will begin sloping down hill now. Prediction: If all goes to plan the

Devils will have a good year. However, odds are they will blow it in the post season if they make it. Grade B The Buffalo Sabres: The team that has gone through five captains last year seems to have settled with their choice in Jason Pominville. Teppo Numminen, Jochen Hecht and Derek Roy will be Alternate Captains respectively. Jimmy Bonneau, Tyler Bouck, Mathieu Darche, Craig Rivet and Patrick Lalime were picked up in free agency. (Prediction: The team looks good on page and on the ice. After last years disappointing season the team needs a boost.) Grade B+ Detroit Redwings: The reigning champions of hockey get prepared to play yet another season with all new additions to an already stacked team. One such free agent sniped by Detroit is Marian Hossa, an all-star in the sport. For a team that has players like Datsyuk, Zetterberg, Lidstrom, Rafalski, Cleary, Franzen, and Flippula, what more can they want? Prediction: Hockeytown may win another cup and possibly head towards a dynasty with a team like this. Grade A+ Pittsburgh Penguins: The 20072008 season showed how Sydney Crosby isn’t really the glue holding this team together. Evgeni Malkin (drafted second overall in 2004, a year before “Sid the Kid”) pulled together a whopping 106 points in the season. Some new additions to this team are Eric Godard, Ruslan Fedotenko and Miroslav Satan. Prediction: Penguins will make it to the playoffs but will probably lose to a team in their own conference unless there is a more dramatic amount of teamwork on the part of the show-

boater Sydney Crosby. Grade A Quick Grades: Anaheim Ducks – C Atlanta Thrashers – D- (This team needs to be completely restructured) Boston Bruins – D Calgary Flames – C+ Carolina Hurricanes – CChicago Blackhawks – BColorado Avalanche – B Columbus Blue jackets – D (B for Pascal Leclaire, a sophomore goalie, who had 9 shut outs and a save percentage of .919 in his rookie season.) Dallas Stars – A Edmonton Oilers- C+ Florida Panthers – D Los Angeles Kings – CMinnesota Wild – B Montreal Canadians – A Nashville Predators – D (B+ for the goalie Dan Ellis) Ottawa Senators – BPhiladelphia Flyers – CPhoenix Coyotes – D San Jose Sharks – B+ St. Louis Blues – C+ Tampa Bay Lightning – B+ (Steve Stamkos, the number one player from the NHL draft, will be on the starting lineup. Could give this team the drive they so eagerly need). Toronto Maple Leafs – CVancouver Canucks – BWashington Capitals – B+ (A+ for Alexander Ovechkin) Some special events happening this hockey season are, opening games in Stockholm, Sweden and Prague, Czech Republic, the winter classic in Chicago’s Wrigley Field and the retirement of players like Adam Graves.

36 Sports

Vol. XXX, Issue 2 | Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Shea Goodbye By Jason Wirchin

“Next stop, Shea Stadium.” Any lifelong Mets fan and experienced subway rider knows that those four words crackling over the 7 train’s speakers can only mean one thing: home is near. For 45 years, our beloved ballpark in Queens has provided us with memories to last a lifetime and summer afternoons to savor forever. Even if they meant emptying our wallets just to get there. But as another season draws to a close, this sky-high monument to the Boys of Summer (and many others) takes its final bow as it closes its doors and gives way to Citi Field next April. So in honor of Shea’s last hoorah, let us take a trip down Roosevelt Avenue (to the corner of 126th Street, of course) and reflect on nearly a half-century of unforgettable moments, rockin’ concerts, and way too expensive hot dogs. Built in 1964 in conjunction with the World’s Fair, Shea’s early years were marked by baseball…absolutely terrible baseball! In the Mets’ first year there, they won a dismal 53 games and lost 109. Would you expect any better with no-names like Hawk Taylor, Bobby Klaus, and Roy McMillan in the starting lineup? Not exactly Murderer’s Row, huh! Shea did host the All-Star Game that year, though it was the only time the Midsummer Classic ever came to Flushing. Nonetheless, throughout most of the 60’s, the Mets never placed better than ninth in the National League. Then came 1969. Up until the summer of that year, the Mets continued to play one mediocre game after another and it seemed as if ‘69 was bound to turn out like the club’s previous seven seasons. However, by the All-Star break in July, the Amazins’ had moved into second place in the National League East, trailing the Cubs by only 4.5 games in the standings. Remarkably winning 37 of their last 48 games, the team took over first place on September 10, and clinched the division crown on September 24 in a 6-0 win over the Cardinals. They went on to defeat the Braves in the League Championship Series and slaughtered the Orioles in five games to win the World Series at Shea on October 16. The lovable losers were losers no more and ruled as the Kings of Queens. Following their first championship in franchise history, the Mets returned to the Fall Classic in 1973 – with the help of Tug McGraw’s “Ya Gotta Believe” mantra – only to lose to the Ath-

letics in seven games. For the next decade, the team hit its doldrums and it wasn’t until the mid-1980’s that the Shea faithful began to feel the winds of October start to blow. In 1986, the Mets dominated the National League. Finishing the regular season in first place with a 108-54 record and a 21.5 game lead over the Phillies in the division (oh, how nice that would be today!); these Bad Boys were a team of destiny. They were unruly, they were obnoxious, but they were good, really good! After defeating the Astros in a six-game National League Championship Series, the Mets found themselves back in the World Series. After losing the first two games at home and winning the next two out of three up in Boston, the team returned to Shea facing elimination. But this trip home would be different. The reason? Game Six. On October 25, in front of a paid crowd of more than 55,000, Boston was one out away from winning their first title in 68 years. Yet these Mets would not back down, and, perhaps with a little help from the baseball gods Mookie Wilson’s slow roller up the first base line somehow found its way under Bill Buckner’s legs and…, well, the rest is history. Two days later, the team won its second Series. Shea shook. Queens quaked. The Mets were once again champions of the world! In 1988, Shea had playoff fever yet again. This time, though, the magic of ‘86 had worn off and the dream was not to be. After losing a seven-game NLCS to the Dodgers, that ass-haulin’ squad from just two seasons earlier was slowly dismantled and a new era of Mets would enter the scene. Nothing spectacular came from the 1989 to 1998 teams, the next two years finally gave Mets fans reason to believe. Having clinched the NL wild card in 1999, Bobby Valentine’s bunch found themselves in a spot to win the Division Series at home. Up three games to one versus the Diamondbacks, back-up catcher Todd Pratt came to the plate in the bottom of the tenth with the score locked at three. One swing of the bat was all it took as Pratt launched a seriesclinching homer over the wall that just eluded centerfielder Steve Finley’s glove. Radio announcer Gary Cohen called it best: “It’s outta here! It’s outta! Pratt hit it over the fence! Mets win the ballgame!” The Mets proceeded to face the Braves in the second round of the ‘99 playoffs, and despite Robin Ventura’s famous “grand slam single” in the bottom of the fifteenth to force a game six; At-

Bye Bye Apple

lanta squashed the hopes of so many eager fans as they won the series (but lost to the Yankees in the Fall Classic – nice!). Speaking of those damn Yankees, 2000 was a year for the ages. In the first Subway Series World Series since 1956 (when the Yanks played the Dodgers), the Mets battled their crosstown rivals in a fan-crazy media frenzy. The city was ablaze in blue, orange, and pinstripes, and what better place to host the middle games of the series than at rickety Shea. The Mets salvaged the first game at home, but that was all. The Bombers went on to win the Series two nights later. After a six-year layoff, Willie Randolph’s boys roared through the rest of the National League in 2006. Dubbed a relentless pursuit for the postseason, the team’s journey from Game 1 through Game 162 was marked by one stellar win after another. Clinching the franchise’s first division title since 1988, the dynamic duo of Reyes & Wright propelled the team past the Dodgers in the NLDS and into a classic second-round showdown with the Cardinals. Forced to a defining Game 7, Shea was the scene for two of the most exhilarating and heart-breaking events in club history. Following Endy Chavez’s superman catch to rob Scott Rolen of a home run in the sixth, Carlos Beltran took a called third strike to end the game, the series, and the dreams of Mets fans from Manhattan to Montauk. It still hurts. Playoff appearances aside, the stadium has had no shortage of “Amazin’” moments. In April 1997 on the 50th anniversary of Jackie Robinson’s first game in the Major Leagues, Commissioner

Bud Selig officially retired number 42 throughout all of baseball, as President Bill Clinton and Jackie Robinson’s widow, Rachel Robinson, looked on. And who could forget that stirring Mike Piazza home run in New York’s first sporting event since 9/11? With tens of thousands of uneasy fans packed into Shea, the place served as a house of community, a house of togetherness. As Piazza’s shot soared majestically over the centerfield fence, New Yorkers, at least for a night, had something to cheer about. Although they are the ballpark’s primary tenants, the Mets aren’t the only team to have ever called Shea home. The Jets played their home games there from 1964 to 1983 and the Giants, in 1975. Shea actually hosted both New York football teams, the Mets and the Yankees, in 1975 as Yankee Stadium underwent renovations. Pity the schedule makers that year! More than just an all around sporting venue, however, over the years Shea has served as quite the musical scene. From The Beatles’ landmark concerts in 1965 and 1966, Shea has hosted the likes of Jimi Hendrix, Jethro Tull, The Who, The Police, Simon and Garfunkel, The Rolling Stones, Eric Clapton, and Bruce Springsteen. This past summer, Billy Joel played two concerts to commemorate the stadium’s ultimate season. So as autumn arrives and leaves the traces of summer behind, we salute Shea one final time. We will miss its deplorable parking, $20 foam fingers, stray cats, and ear-shattering sound system; and we’ll never forget the constantly flooded bathrooms (which resemble Temples of Doom, if anything else). Granted, it has its quirks, but they’re our quirks. What else would you expect from an outdated heap of steel and concrete nestled between Queens’ best junkyards and the Whitestone Expressway? As Citi Field looms ominously over the centerfield fence, it’s clear that Shea’s days are through. The last beer will be sold, the last out will be made, and the last fans will leave the turnstiles. But regardless of when our beloved park falls to the wrecking ball, that big ol’ blue, cookie-cutter of a stadium will always remind us of what it means to be a kid again. As tough as this is to say…..Farewell, dear friend. Thanks for the memories.

Sports

The Stony Brook Press

37

I Hate It When Red Sox Fans Are Right By David Robin

It’s the last week of the 2008 Major League Baseball season and much like every season since 1996, the Tampa Bay Rays are in first place of the American League(AL) East…WHAT?! The sports section of the newspaper has many typos these days. Either that or the absence of the word “devil” from the name of the team from Tampa actually boosted their performance. The Devil Rays were last place with 96 losses last season and this season, the Rays are at the top and currently have 96 wins, with three games left to play. With this impressive turnaround, they are clearly the biggest story of the AL East. When people talk about baseball, they talk about either the rise of the Rays or the fall of the New York Yankees. The Yankees have 87 wins and 72 losses as of today, only a few games back from last year’s 94-68 record. This may not seem like a big difference but they currently sit in third place in the division, with no chance of the playoffs for the first time since 1995. This may not seem like a big idea to some, but this is New York and they are the Yankees, they have no choice but to make it to the playoffs! I want Bud Selig, the Commissioner of Major League Baseball to take back those words he said in 2003, where he complained about the “competitive imbalance” in baseball. The Yankees are in third place and the Rays, a team that has never made the play-offs, are in first. What did the Yankees do wrong?

Wow, A-Rod sucks at everything.

What change dragged them down the standings for the whole duration of the season? Was it the players? This is clearly not the case because the Yankees did not make as many changes over the offseason as usual. Almost all of the starting players from 2007 were back on the team last April, destroying any thoughts of the team not “meshing.” Was it Joe Torre’s stoic face in the dugout that made the difference? He had a managerial record of 1,173 – 767 during his 12-year term with the Yankees. He left at the end of last year and Joe Girardi edged out Don Mattingly for the manager job during the offseason. While Girardi was the 2006 NL Manager of Year with the Marlins, his job this year with the Yankees has to be looked at with scrutiny. While it is difficult to find out what happens behind the scenes, Girardi was the biggest change from last season and the decisions of a manager can greatly affect a ballclub. Another scapegoat of the Yankees’ plummet is the Yankees General Manager, Brian Cashman. While he has been with the Yankees since 1998, he has been at the helm for 3 World Series titles. While he has signed great players like Alex Rodriguez and Hideki Matsui, he has also signed huge busts like Jaret Wright, Jose Contreras, Kei Igawa, Kevin Brown, and Carl Pavano. Is it possible that these bad moves have compounded over time and finally greatly affected the Yankees? The same thing happened to the Braves, who are in 4th place, 18 games out of first place. While looking at management, the owners of the Yankees, Hank and Hal Steinbrenner. Last year, the never subtle George Steinbrenner was the owner of the team. He has always given players and managers a short leash and while he has been criticized for his moves, he always puts winning before everything else. While this may not have been healthy, especially since he stepped down after being too sick to continue as the owner, it may have given motivation to the team that simply not exist with George’s sons. Okay, enough about management, let’s look at the players, since they are the ones who actually play out the games. The Yankees pitching has been seen as inferior to previous years, especially due to early season injuries. They were already gambling during spring training with a starting rotation consisting of Phil Hughes and Ian Kennedy, two unproven rookies. The third notable rookie, Joba Chamberlin, was going to be a starter but began the season as the

Pictures are often worth a thousand words.

setup reliever, his proven position. Hughes and Kennedy did not perform to expectations and they both ended up getting injured, as well as the Yankees ace, Chien Ming Wang. However, the holes were filled and the rotation did much better than expected. Mike Mussina had arguably the best season of his career, with a 19-9 record and a 3.47 ERA. In addition, Andy Pettitte went 14-14 with a 4.54 ERA which wasn’t his best but he still had many impressive outings. Rookie reliever, Dan Giese had a 3.53 ERA and while he only started three games, he still came through when it counted. Chamberlin also came through once he became a starter but was bitten by the injury bug. However, hese few positives could not outweigh the negatives and the injuries. Sidney Ponson had one or two good starts but he was inconsistent, Carl Pavano is providing too little, too late, and a 5.34 ERA and a 5-10 record was not what the Yankees expected when they called up Darrell Rasner. Without the injuries, these weaknesses in the farm system may not have been revealed and the Yankees may have had a stronger starting rotation, but hindsight is twenty-twenty and hitting is also important in baseball. The Yankees are .259 with runners in scoring position. This is the worst that they have done in these clutch situations in a long time. When watching a Yankee game this season, it is hard to get excited when players are in scoring position because the Yankees have flatout not come through in these situations. However, the Rays also have a very low batting average with runners in scoring position so the importance of this statistic may be overstated. Many of the Yankee starters have not had the

seasons that were expected of them. Derek Jeter has finally made it just over .300 with only 69 runs batted in (RBIs). Abreu is batting .296 with only 20 homeruns and Alex Rodriguez is at .300 with only 101 RBIs , impressive statistics but not what A-Rod is used to. Cano is batting only .264 with 66 RBIs, Melky Cabrera was batting .243 with 46 RBIs before he was sent down to the minor leagues, and Giambi is sitting at .251, a far cry from the .342 that he posted in 2002. It seems as if almost all of the Yankees most important hitters just fell into a malaise. Injuries are also a key element to the collapse of the Yankee offense. Jeter and A-Rod were injured early in the season, with Matsui and Posada following soon after. Damon had a good season until his shoulder bothered him, sitting him out for an important segment of the season. While Molina did a satisfactory job behind the plate and the Xavier Nady was a great addition from the Pirates, it just wasn’t enough. Cody Ransom, Brett Gardner, and Justin Christian tried their best to fill in the numerous holes but they could not compensate from the great loss. This combination of injuries and bad years for many players definitely contributed to their collapse. After examining these factors, it is apparent that it was not one factor, but a combination of different ones which led to the fall of the Yankees- much like the fall of the Holy Roman Empire. The debate will continue all offseason but it is very hard to blame only one aspect of the Yankees’ failure. The only thing left to say, is that maybe the new Yankee Stadium will revitalize the team next season. Let’s Go Mets?

38 Sports

Vol. XXX, Issue 2 | Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Sports Fortnight In Review By Habib Aminy Staff Writer tk

The top news this past week was the “fundamentaly strong economy” faltering even more and the presidential debates which were just like any other presidential debate, filled with rhetoric, hyperboles, castigation and the same BS promises by politicians. Quoting Nikita Khrushchev, “Politicians promise bridges when there are no rivers.” As an informed American, it’s demoralizing that these politicians who have the power and money to make a difference create more problems than what they “fix.” One of the many reasons why sports is interesting and politics is depressing is because there is nothing shady to what you’re watching or any corruption unless you are watching the MLB with steroid infested players, the New England Patriots, or the NBA with its gambling referees. The headlines of the past sports week comprise of the amazin’ Mets failing to make the playoffs, Allan Houston coming back to the Knicks, Brett Favre’s record day against the Cardinals and Sugar Shane Mosley’s fight against Ricardo Mayorga this past Saturday night. As I predicted in last issue’s article, the Mets choked and will miss the playoffs. My prediction came true when the Mets lost to the Florida Marlins in their final game at Shea Stadium. If Family Feud were to have a question on how the Mets lose, the top answer would most certainly be their bullpen. With the game tied 2-2 at the top of the eighth, former Atlanta Braves first baseman Wes Helms hit a bomb off Scott Schoeneweis. Dan Uggla then hit a homer as well, this one off Luis Ayala, to make it 4-2. Though this game wouldn’t be classified under the embarrassing major league leading thirty

blown saves by the Mets bullpen, the pen clearly didn’t do their job again, and it didn’t help that the offense couldn’t hit against Florida’s pitchers. David Wright mirrored Barack Obama’s diplomatic style after the game saying, “We failed. We failed as a team. There’s no pointing fingers. There’s no excuses. We as a unit didn’t get the job done.” Had David Wright followed John McCain’s style, he would have stated, “My friends, my friends, I did my job. The bullpen were terrorists and that’s why we didn’t make the playoffs. We need to get rid of these terrorists or we will always miss the playoffs.” As the Mets experienced “Shea-Ja Vu,” the Brewers are heading to the playoffs after a 26-year hiatus. Such an occasion calls for a champagne celebration best equipped with Michael Phelps swimming goggles, the majority of the Brewers styled.

With both the Yankees and Mets out of the playoffs, the local newspapers are finally going to report on real sports like football, basketball and hockey. Yes, hockey is a sport that is far more athletic and entertaining than baseball. I make this complaint about the newspapers over-posting on baseball because it is disappointing to have reporters post BS articles for seven months about baseball players’ lives. For example, do we have to know how Alex Rodriquez likes men, or how the Mets bullpen watches Déjà Vu before every game. As for the Mets, Yankees and my Braves there is always next year. Though this past year was a disappointment, to say the least, for all these capitalistically talented teams that are all for “orgy spending,” one must commend Larry “Chipper” Jones for winning the National League batting title, hitting .364 for the year. Moving onto the NFL, Brett Favre had an amazing game as the Jets defeated the Arizona Cardinals. Throwing for a franchise tying record of six touchdowns, and going 24-for-34 for 289 yards and an interception, Brett Favre silenced all the critics and has kept hope alive for Jets fans. His counterpart, Kurt Warner, statistically went bananas throwing 40-of-57 for 472 yards with two touchdowns, though the four turnovers by Warner (two interceptions and two fumbles) were critical in that it led to Jets scoring every time. Had it not been for seven turnovers by the Arizona Canaries, this game would have been far closer because both defenses were pathetic. Moving on to the entertaining, yet loser loaded, Knicks, another boneheaded move was made by the Knicks’ management in signing 37-year-old veteran, Allan Houston. Absent from the

game for a good five years, there is heavy doubt as to whether the move was a wise one; to be more precise, the Knicks need big men that play defense like Marcus Camby or Tyson Chandler. There are also rumors that Stephon Marbury’s contract will be bought out in the upcoming weeks and will be released as a result. It is sad that it has come to this in the Starbury Saga because Stephon gave it his all when he did play. Only time will tell what will happen with Marbury and Houston because the Knicks have seventeen players on the roster and teams are only allowed fifteen at the start of the season. If I were a betting man, Jerome James’ and Marbury’s contracts would be bought out. Closing out this week in sports is this past Saturday night’s fight between Sugar Shane Mosley and Ricardo Mayorga, which can be described as humorous. Mayorga’s punching accuracy was horrendous at 12% compared to Mosley at 40%. Mayorga spent more time cheering and pumping his fist than actually punching Sugar Shane. He was also more accurate in hugging Mosley at almost 1000% accuracy. Mosley, on the other hand, was just beating the hell out of Mayorga, and I give credit to Mayorga for being Mosley’s punching bag. The final round was entertaining, with Mosley delivering left jabs and left hooks with Mayorga getting dizzy and what not. Mosley knocked out Mayorga with fifteen seconds left in the final round, and Mayorga got up at about seven seconds left. Then, with one second, left Sugar Shane puts the icing on the cake, getting the second KO with a devastating left hook dead on in the middle of Mayorga’s face. In closing I leave you with a thought, why are the Mets known as the “Amazin’ Mets”?

Sports

The Stony Brook Press Have fun reading this while you are in some boring class. Love, e Press

39

North

East

North

East

Pittsburgh Steelers (3-1)

Buffalo Bills (4-0)

Green Bay Packers (2-2)

New York Giants (3-0)

So Alan Faneca le the Steelers and Ben Roethlisberger is going for the reocrd of most frequently sacked QB. Awesome.

Buffalo joins the Titans and the Giants as the only undefeated teams in the NFL. Who is their quarterback again?

You were probably expectng a comparison between Favre and Rodgers. Look at their records. Happy?

Winning a close game against the Bengals, the Giants had a bye and Plaxico was fined for the 50th time of his Giant career. He is breaking records.

Baltimore Ravens (2-2) Whatever. Boring team. ey haven’t had anything interesting happen to them since they won the Super Bowl eight years ago and Ray Lewis murdered that guy.

New England Patriots (2-1) Coming off an embarassing loss to the Dolphins, the bye comes at a perfect time for the NFL’s biggest cheaters as they can think about how much they will suck.

Chicago Bears (2-2)

Washington Redskins (3-1)

Big win over a stong Eagles team. ough the offense was sloppy, Urlacher and the defense came up big. Note: Rex is still on the bench.

Aer losing to the Giants, the Redskins have turned their season around and proven that they can compete in the toughest division in the NFL.

Cleveland Browns (1-3)

New York Jets (2-2)

Minnesota Vikings (1-3)

Dallas Cowboys (3-1)

You know your team is bad when they have to beat the Bengals in order to get their first win.

e Brett Favre is back and he is better then ever. Suprisingly, with six touchdown passes, John Madden is still alive.

So Travaaris was replaced by Gus Ferotte. Peterson scored, Vikings defense let up. Vikings lose. Adrian still a prime fantasy player.

How many times was T.O. thrown the ball? ough an onside kick may have allowed the Cowboys to come back, all the hype can now end.

Cincinatti Bengals (0-4)

Miami Dolphins (1-2)

Detroit Lions (0-3)

Philadelphia Eagles (2-2)

You know your team is bad when you can’t beat the Browns to break a three game losing streak.

With a big win over the Patriots, Ronnie Brown looks to be the sleeper pick of the year.

You know your team sucks when the only news mention you get is the firing of your team president. Looks like the anksgiving game will be lame.

Despite what their record may indicate, the Eagles are a force to be reckoned with. Note: Hank Baskett is a poor fantasy football option.

South

West

South

West

Tennessee Titans (4-0)

Denver Broncos (3-1)

Carolina Panthers (3-1)

Arizona Cardinals (2-2)

e Titans have a strong chance at being 5-0 going into their upcoming bye-week.With an impressive defense, the Titans should win over the Ravens.

Starting the season off 3-0 only to lose to the Kansas City Chiefs creates doubt into the legitmacy of this team.

e Panthers killed the Falcons like Michael Vick killed dogs.

Kurt Warner throws for 8 million yards but turns over the ball too many times.

Jacksonville Jaguars (2-2)

San Diego Chargers (2-2)

Tampa Bay Buccaneers (3-1)

San Francisco 49ers (2-2)

Aer losing two nail biters to start off their season, the Jaguars have rebounded by winning two nail biters.

e Chargers finally win over two notso-impressive teams. To their benefit, they face the Dolphins next.

Aer his three-month old son died in his sleep, Tampa Bay kicker Matt Bryant scored almost half of the team’s points.

Who is their QB again?

Indianapolis Colts (1-2)

Oakland Raiders (1-3)

New Orleans Saints (2-2)

Seattle Seahawks (1-3)

DSRL veteran Peyton Manning and the Colts had their bye and look to take control of a division they once ruled with an iron fist.

Raiders are sticking to what they know best. Losing.

No Colston, no Shockey, no problem.

You know your team is bad when Matt Hasselback is your quarterback.

Houston Texans (0-3)

Kansas City Chiefs (1-3)

Atlanta Falcons (2-2)

St. Louis Rams (0-4)

e Texans gave it their all against the Jaguars only to lose in OT. Hungry for their first win, the Texans will face the demoralized Colts.

Congrats to the Chiefs for winning what will be their only victory of the season.

Beating the Chiefs means very little when you get killed in your next game.

is teams sucks so much that this is all I will write about them.

Death Egg Zone