The Captain Of My Dream

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Captain Of My Dreams

By Janet Mahn

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Copyright @2008 L.L All Rights Reserved Published in the United States of America January, 2008 First Edition

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Acknowledgments I would like to thank my friends and family for their encouragement. To Lisa Lucchesi who works so hard and takes no credit. To Mary P. who is an established author of horror. And to Diana-my partner in crime. She is delightful!

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Dedicated To Diana I would like to remember the fun times we had on Prudence Island, RI during a fabulous summer vacation.

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Chapter 1 The white caps were visible from the deck where Claire was standing. She was fighting back tears from her eyes and the wind was blowing against her lightly bronzed skin. It didn’t seem to matter to her that her dark brown hair, long and bleached from the sun, was tangled in a branch from the maple tree with its untrimmed limb hanging over the deck. She reached up, oblivious to a passerby calling to her. She untangled a piece of her hair and started to cry uncontrollably. Her mother had left her this tranquil, beautiful home in the most scenic New England setting. She was here to sell the Estate. Her mother died an untimely death from drowning. Her thoughts went back to the night her mother was swimming out in front on the house, off the shore, and got caught in an undertow. The people on shore were unable to save her as the sand bar moved and the force of the water went out to sea. The coast guard came too late. Her mother was thrown up against the jetties. The townspeople were still talking about the tragedy. Why had she gone swimming alone? She wasn’t even a good swimmer. Claire was unsure, even now. What would have made her mother go swimming without telling anyone? She was thinking about how she would celebrate her upcoming twenty-fifth birthday. She had just bought a truck with a big tool box in back which she planned to use when she went clam digging. She was listening to a tape dedicated to a young man who had died of the hideous disease, AIDS. It was about a courageous young man who lifted the hearts of a nation trying to teach people about this disease. Although Claire was reminiscing about the tragedies of life, she was aware of the sun shining brightly on the white caps and was able to think about the beauty of the 7

surrounding scenery. There was a seagull gliding with such grace as he landed on a nearby rock. She now sat in her truck near the beach and looked out over the coastline. She could feel a bit of joy mixed with sorrow. She was determined to find out the reason why her mother went swimming on that fatal day. Raine`, a salesman for a big city newspaper, had come to see her last week. He was inquiring about the property, which annoyed her as she really didn’t want to sell to anyone she knew. Nostalgia would have hurt her more, she thought. Raine` with his clear blue eyes and blond hair was a handsome man. He dressed like a successful model. He was tall and slender, and when she spoke to him, she remembers how crystal clear his eyes were and how stern looking his features were. There was no sign of emotion as he negotiated the sale of the property when he was here from the big city. She remembered he was dressed in a silk gray suit. His shirt was monogrammed on the sleeve, and his Gucci shoes were so very shiny. Of all days, she thought. She had just come up from the beach only to find her truck had a flat tire. She was trying to fix the flat tire when she noticed Raine` looking down at her tennis shoes with holes cut out of the toes. She used them clam digging, so the water would run out of them. She was embarrassed, and he seemed to find it quite amusing. He helped her fix the flat, told her what beautiful long legs she had, smiled and went on his way.

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Chapter 2 Claire sat in her truck for a long time looking out over the bay. A few small crafts going by gave it a distinctive New England atmosphere. She was oblivious to everything except the pounding waves as she fell asleep in the truck. As she was going through her mother’s belongings, she came across a receipt from a funeral expense signed by her father. It had the name of a woman in her thirties – a name she didn’t recognize. She studied the contents of the envelope and realized her father had buried some woman. No one had ever mentioned a “Colette.” As Claire read further, the address was one in New York City. A picture was also in the envelope with the paid receipts from the funeral. Although worn thin from years of exposure, the picture was creased as if it had spent years in possibly a billfold. She could see the woman had deep set eyes and a perfect nose accented by her high cheek bones. Her hair was pulled back from her face. She was smiling, and in her hand was a bouquet of roses. The writing had been scribbled away. The envelope was very worn and tattered. As she went through the belongings, she remembered that about ten years ago, her mother was crying and shouting. Her father left the house and took the ferry boat over to the mainland and was gone for a long time. Her mother would take her knitting and go out on the jetty and sit for hours not talking to a soul. She would just sit by the bayside and knit. Things were not the same when her father returned. There was always a lot of tension after the return of her father. Her mother began inspecting his mail and following him around. He spent a lot of time going back and forth to New York. She remembers during a hurricane a few years back that he was gone. The wind and rain began, and the waves were 60 feet high at least. Her mother was trying to nail boards up against the windows. Claire and her mother had 9

been alone at the house. Claire remembers the wind was blowing shingles off the roof and the waves were hitting up against the windows of the porch. Many windows broke as the water poured in onto the porch. As she looked out the bathroom window, she saw an enormous wave go up and over the neighbor’s house, and when the wave was gone, she remembered the house was also gone. What a terrifying experience. She watched further as the storm grew more intense; the waves were up over the lighthouse. The only store near the shore was engulfed by the high seas and washed away, leaving only the foundation. The trees all around the house were being blown down. She remembers how her mother took her hand and made her jump from a back window, and then after she jumped, pulled her up a hill to higher ground away from the shorefront. The waves were more furious and were now washing cars off the dock and then crumbled the dock. After a few hours, there wasn’t a car to be seen or a dock. Destroyed small boats were floating in the bay. The store was gone. The homes on the bayside were gone. There was devastation everywhere as they walked along the shore. There was debris everywhere. A record from the old juke box that had been in the store was lying on the beach. Odd, she thought. A record survived, and the store and all its contents went out to sea. Claire had picked up the old time record, “My Friend,” and thought how amazing, as at the time it was her favorite song. She remembers her mother and the people on the island standing out on the beach handing out cheese and bread that had been dropped off by the Red Cross from planes. For days, that was the only food available. Her father had not been in touch with them, later explaining that the communication to the island was not working. The phone cables were out and it was weeks before he returned. She found letters that had never been mentioned from women unknown to Claire. However, she found nothing to indicate there was a Colette in her father’s life. As she looked further into a large, metal box, she found her father’s French diplomas from the schools he had attended. She 10

wondered if Colette may have gone to school with him. She looked through a lot of pictures. There was a picture of a beautiful woman with toe shoes on a big, beautiful stage sitting with a known Russian princess. The beautiful woman was her mother. Her father had forbidden her mother to continue with her dancing. She must have been so sad. At the bottom of the box was the wedding picture that was never in view. This had been the first time that Claire had ever seen it. She packed everything up as she went along, tying them and stacking them against the wall. Little by little everything was packed away. Claire gave most of the furniture that wasn’t being used to the firemen to auction off at the Firemen’s Ball. A few days passed, and Claire was getting out of the shower when she heard voices. She put on a long shirt. The wetness of her skin made the shirt cling to her slim figure. As she opened the bathroom door, she could see Raine` entering the house followed by a stunning blonde in her early twenties. As they made their way into the living room, he introduced the blonde woman as Tina. She felt a tinge of pain as they stared at each other and then glanced away. She acknowledged Tina with a smile. “What can I do for you?” Claire asked. Raine` replied, “I wanted to show Tina your home. She is interested in the estate.” Claire’s heart felt heavy and she was uncertain as to why she felt this way. How dare he just barge in and why would this woman be interested in the estate? Tina wore a red sun dress and her blonde hair was cut short around her face. She had blue eyes, and looked very elegant. Claire was thoroughly upset as she showed them through the house. As they walked through the upstairs, she turned to see him run his hand along her arm until he held her hand. They were laughing, and Tina seemed very excited about the house. It was everything she dreamed of. The surrounding property was at least two acres. It was neatly landscaped. Claire couldn’t have been more disappointed. She knew she didn’t want Raine` with Tina. 11

She hoped Tina would not make an offer. I wonder how long Raine` has known Tina, Claire thought. She was saddened by the possibility that Tina and maybe Raine` would want the estate.

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Chapter 3 The day of the Regatta was perfect. A breeze was just what was hoped for. The sailboats were sailing towards the starting point. The beauty of the color of the sails and the class of the boats were exciting parts of the Regatta. People were lining up along the shore and sitting on the jetties with their coolers. Hundreds of boats were out in the bay. It was the best event of the season. Every once in a while, the clanging of the bell from the channel marker and the laughter from the shoreline was audible. Ned had come to see the race with Claire. Ned, an unusual, quiet, nice and enchanting man first appeared one day in Claire’s life, and had been coming over more and more. Claire often thought Ned resembled her father. He had dark eyes, jet black hair, natural dark olive skin, and Ned’s teeth sparkled when he laughed. He had the most perfect white teeth Claire had ever seen. His body was tall and slender-almost frail. He had small hands that worked to perfection when he was pulling the sails up on his boat and releasing the jib lines. He was a great sportsman. Just then, a jeep passed by on the side of the narrow road near the house. It was Raine` and seated next to him was Tina. He yelled over to Claire to see if he could leave his car parked on her property. She nodded yes. She could feel the blood draining from her head and was a little disturbed that Tina was running along side of him now. He was in a hurry to make the deadline for the race. His tanned body was in excellent form as he jogged in his bathing suit oblivious of Claire watching his every move. He apparently had his mind on the race. Ned as usual was joking with Claire about her tennis shoes with the holes in the toes, and he grabbed her hand and they went to the shoreline to join their friends. Claire glanced towards the jetties and couldn’t help but wonder how her mother had been thrown against them without anyone being aware that she had been swimming.

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Late into the afternoon the sailing race continued. Raine` was very much in the lead and Claire, unknown to everyone, was hoping Raine` would win. His boat with its yellow and blue striped sail was going at full speed with the wind in his favor. Patrick, a city fellow, was neck and neck with his sailboat. Patrick had won last year and was known as a great sportsman. Patrick had always liked Tina. He was also blonde and had a smile that could melt butter. He always took Claire out after the race, but this year Ned was here. Thank goodness, she thought. It would only complicate her life more. Suddenly, Raine`’s boat seemed to have turned way over on its side, and it was evident he was having trouble with the sails. Patrick was now far ahead of Raine`. The other sailboats following behind were a beautiful sight in the bay. Claire wondered what had happened. Tina was one of Raine`’s crew members and Claire felt a bit of disappointment knowing this. Raine` got his sail under control and came in a close second. Many of the others still were lagging behind. It was a great day for sandwiches and drinks. There was a clam bake going on at the far side of the beach and the bonfire and fireworks would be later on in the evening. Ned was going to stay for it and Claire was glad to have his company. Claire was sitting on the beach watching the bonfire with Ned when she saw Raine` coming onto the sandy beach without Tina. She was actually glad to see him alone. He was coming towards them. He had on a yellow short sleeved shirt and white shorts and sandals. He looked so handsome with his bleached blond hair, bleached almost white from the sun. He was smiling. His dimple in the middle of his chin was deeper than she remembered and his eyes were so blue they looked as if she could see her face in them. They looked like steel. As he approached them, he smiled at Claire and said Hi to Ned. The men started talking about the race. Tina had lost control of the jib line causing them to lose the race. Raine` told Claire he had to leave town for a few days. He was 14

going to New York on a business trip and would be back with Tina to see the estate again. How she wished he would forget about her estate. If only she could keep it herself, but the expenses were more than she could manage.

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Chapter 4 It was a beautiful sunny, breezy day. There wasn’t a cloud in the sky. The water in the bay was calm. It looked like glass, only the color of sea green. With foaming waves hitting the shore and sea gulls gliding in from along the beach, the view was breathtaking. The day was perfect for sailing. People were already walking along the beach. One young man caught Claire’s eyes and other people as well. He was a very tall young man with wavy hair down to his shoulders. He had a perfect body with muscles that suggested he was a body builder. His suit was only a G-strap and all Claire could see was a shiny gold strap between his butt. The muscles of his ass were tan as he turned. His strong looking body was so perfect; she could see all heads turn as he briskly walked along the beach. “Sure made my day,” thought Claire as she sat on the deck overlooking the bay. The boats that went by the estate had sails the color of green, pink, blue and yellow and they made an awesome sight on a beautiful New England day. Claire and Ned had been out sailing for an hour when suddenly Ned reached over and grabbed Claire and gently began kissing her. Claire was so surprised, she pulled back a little with a smile and gave him a push as they were being splashed by the waves and the boat was going around again. Ned was laughing as he tried to steer the boat out over the waves. The waves started to become more intense. The sky suddenly became darker and a northwestern wind was in the air. A tanker was getting close to them. Ned tried to stay calm, but could see they were in the tanker’s way. The motor now conked out and they were unable to keep the craft from being bounced around by the sea. Claire was holding onto the side of the boat when a wave hit that portion of the boat with such force she fell backwards and hit her head on the back seat. Ned was trying to empty the water out of the boat so they wouldn’t capsize. The waves were getting higher and the wind stronger, and the water was filling up faster then he 16

could bail. He splashed water on Claire and yelled to her hoping she wasn’t hurt. She was dazed and was aware of voices. The Coast Guard had seen they were in trouble and came to pick them up. They were just in time. The tanker went by very close to where they were in the channel. The Coast Guard helped Ned get Claire into their boat and towed Ned’s boat behind them.

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Chapter 5 Ned was laughing as he sipped his coffee in the sunny living room of Claire’s home. She had slipped away to put on some dry clothes and returned in a lavender blue dress with a lavender blue ribbon tied around her swept back dark brown hair. Ned noticed how beautiful she was. Her eyes did all the talking. They always sparkled. She was like a shining star. She was very innocent to the ways of the city girls, he was thinking. Claire was always glad to see Ned and as he left, he kissed her on the cheek and she felt lonely without him. She wished she could feel some excitement in his kiss. As he went off to sea again, she could see the water was now very calm and the wind had stopped blowing.

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Chapter 6 It was time to go clam digging. The tide was low, and Claire put on her tennis shoes with the hole in the toes. Her hair was swept up on top of her head in a knot. She already looked wind blown. Her face was free from makeup. She looked into the mirror and smiled, and thought how tan she was and this is just the place she wanted to be. She knew she would soon be back on duty. She knew her next nursing assignment was in Boston. She was moving her feet along the sand under the water feeling for clams when up on the road she heard a car stop. She looked up and saw Raine` on her porch leaving a package. She turned and started to swim further out as she did not want him to see her digging for clams. She had dozens of clams now, and was happy with her findings. The sea gulls were flying overheard. They had a squeaking sound and their wings were grey and white. They would come close to shore looking for fish and garbage. They were always around for the throw away clams, some of which had cracked open. As Claire approached the porch, she saw the package with a note attached. She picked it up and read, “Wear these tonight. I’ll pick you up at seven. I won’t take no for an answer.” It was signed Raine`. She opened the package and there were a pair of striped red, yellow and blue sandals. Claire was smiling. How very embarrassing, she thought, as she entered the house singing. She decided to go to dinner with Raine`. Her heart was pounding. She was so excited. Raine` probably wanted to see if Claire would sell the house to Tina at a good price. She tried not to get too excited. She slipped into a yellow jumpsuit that did wonders for her long, slim figure and brushed her hair to one side securing it with a big yellow clip. She had a tint of pink lipstick on, and as she answered the knock at the door, there was Raine` with roses in one hand and the most handsome smile. He looked like he was glad to see her as he said, “I’m 19

delighted you took me up on this dinner date.” He looked down at her feet to see her pink toenails sticking out of her sandals and just smiled. He had his sailboat out front and he had picked a cafe out on the island where all the boats stopped to dock. They walked out on the long dock where the old beautiful mahogany sailboat was tied to the pier. Raine` jumped on first and held out a hand for Claire. As she got onto the boat, his eyes caught hers, and for an instant, she could feel a sensation in her chest that just wasn’t there with anyone else. Claire held tight to the main sail and then helped lighten the jib lines as they pulled away from the pier. Raine` shut the motor off and asked Claire if she wanted to take the wheel as Raine` fastened the jib lines and the main sail. Claire could feel that rush that goes through you when you sail. You become addicted to sailing, she thought and turned. She was getting up to 6.2 knots when Raine` came and sat alongside of her. The bay was filled with other boats and she was on the lookout for the red and green buoy signifying how far to go left or right in the channel. It was a beautiful night. The islands they passed while they were sailing over to the restaurant were so green and the lawns were immaculately cut. The jetties were jagged along the shore. The wind was blowing on their faces and Claire felt so happy sailing with Raine`. They walked up a flight of stairs where the restaurant was, and Claire was impressed by the way the room was decorated. There was a sea captain at the door, fish nets along the railing with star fish in the nets, and a large tank alongside of the fish nets with live lobster swimming around. Claire loved the taste of lobster, so she was delighted with the restaurant. Raine` picked a table that looked out over the water. It was a quiet spot in the corner. She felt so at a loss with him. “You look delicious,” he said, as he reached over to touch her hand. She put her other hand up and down his fingers and she could see a serene look on his face. She felt a sudden spark go through her, warm and tingling. They ordered a cool island drink made from the grapes of the 20

vineyard in back of the estate. For a moment, she had a flash that maybe Raine` and Tina wanted the estate to extend the vineyard. She pushed the thought from her mind and talked about the lobster she was going to pick for dinner. She paused a moment and thought about what she had heard about saving a lobster in Chicago. She remembered Bob Greene from the Chicago Tribune writing an article about a lobster that was very old and someone had won the lobster. A pleading Chicago had tried to save its life. Claire ordered fish instead. Raine` laughed. He had picked a very large lobster. They were now aware the restaurant was closing and the lights on the dock were turned on. They were looking forward to the sailboat ride home. Raine` reached over and softly kissed her lips. She responded with a slow gentle long kiss that made her lips feel warm. She could feel the warmth from his tender kiss. They were walking along the dock. The winds were blowing against them. In the distance, they could hear the fog horn and see the light from the light house. Raine` was not sure if they would be able to sail back to Claire’s house. He would have to use the outboard motor. As they approached the sailboat, Raine` helped her in, and as she took his hand she gazed into his blue eyes and felt him come closer. His chest was now resting against hers. They were kissing and his hands stroked her breasts and then her stomach, and as his hands started down her thigh, she slowly pushed him away. As he started the motor, Claire moved to the front of the boat and looked out over the high waves. The moon looked hazy through the fog. The boat was hitting the waves with such force that Raine` had to concentrate on going into the waves just right so the boat wouldn’t tip over. Claire was so intent on her feelings from his passionate kiss that she was oblivious to the bouncing around of the boat. The wind became fierce and the white caps were high. A loud burst of thunder followed by a bolt of lightning made Claire aware of how much danger they were in. She noticed that the other boats in the water were having difficulty with their sails. The 21

sails were blowing in all directions, and then she noticed many were on their sides. They were closer to shore now, and there were rescue boats on the water now to help those in distress. The sand was blowing with such force that as they got closer to shore, Claire felt like pieces of glass were hitting her face. Lounge chairs were being blown around and some of the waves were sinking the boats just a few feet from shore. The lightning bolts were closer now, and the lighthouse bell was ringing. A few people out on the dock were blown off, but the Coast Guard was close enough to rescue them. Claire and Raine` were soaking wet and very tired from their ordeal. They went to the Bay Side Café which was quite crowded with people, obviously taking shelter from the storm. Claire ordered a wine cooler and Raine` went back out to help tie down some of the sailboats before they tipped over to the side and tore the sails. The thunder and lightning continued, and as the lightning struck, it lit up the whole sky. People inside the café were securing the windows. They were all working together. Amazing, thought Claire, how everyone just pitches in and helps. As soon as they could see that the danger was over and the storm was subsiding, Claire and Raine` ordered some baked oysters and more drinks. When they finally reached Claire’s house, they were laughing without thinking about anything but the excitement of the night. Claire decided not to invite Raine` into the house tonight, so they embraced at the door. Raine` smiled and kissed her with such strength that as she leaned against the closed door behind her, she kicked up her feet and skipped into her room happy with the events of the evening.

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Chapter 7 Claire was called out on an assignment for three weeks. She had to leave early in the morning. She would be at Boston’s Childrens Hospital. She had been taking care of a little girl who was at a progressed stage of non-Hodgkin’s disease. The chemotherapy made little Michelle very ill. Michelle vomited most of the day and Claire had to wash her and keep her comfortable in bed. Michelle had already lost her hair. She was very pale and had a moon face from so many steroids. Claire was taking her time changing the tubing to the port site so she could deliver more chemotherapy. Michelle was so very weak. Claire had brought Michelle a tiny doll dressed like a bride. Michelle looked up and smiled and asked Claire to sing. As Claire sang, she knew Michelle did not have much time. It was so sad when you knew the end was near. Michelle’s mom left the room sobbing and asking, “Isn’t there anything else you can do?” Claire was so wrapped up in taking care of Michelle she forgot her personal life. As she left the room that evening, she kissed Michelle on the forehead and placed the doll next to her cheek. When she worked at Boston’s Childrens Hospital, she stayed at nearby inexpensive housing. She was getting ready to go back home when she was summoned back to the hospital. As she entered Michelle’s room, the little girl was gasping for breath. Her eyes were closed and her mother and father were leaning over their dying daughter. It was soon after Claire’s arrival that Michelle took her final breath. Claire’s heart was filled with sorrow as she left the room with only the sounds of the parents weeping. It had been a long and devastating bout, and Michelle has just finished first the week before in the walkathon for cancer research. Ned was at the South Station in Boston to pick up Claire. He gave her a big hug as the tears fell down her cheeks. The ride back home was quiet. This was the most 23

sorrowful part of being a nurse. Little Michelle will be missed very much. Claire wondered what had brought Ned to New England from his business in Texas. He never seemed to want to talk about his visits. She had met him at the tax assessor’s office over nine months ago. Ned had black curly hair, an olive complexion and a super bright smile. She remembered they had been stuck in the fog and he had asked her to walk with him to the Oyster Bar out on the Middletown dock. They had a wonderful time at lunch and had been great friends ever since.

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Chapter 8 Claire got into her clam digging togs and went down to the shore and out into the cool water. She first took a swim and the only sounds she could hear were the sounds of the waves hitting the shore. All else seemed quiet as she swam. Claire dug clams to sell to the nearby seafood restaurant. It was a relaxing time for her and while she was clam digging her thoughts wandered to Raine`. She hated to think that he only took her to dinner to coax her into selling the estate to Tina. She had heard Tina was a close relative of the people who owned the vineyard. She pushed the thoughts from her mind as she carried a big basket of clams up to the deck. She was in the back taking a shower outside. The shower was in such a place that the wooded area of her estate hid her from anyone passing by. She was just soaping herself when she heard laughter coming from the front of the house. She rinsed herself off, her hair dripping wet and grabbed a towel when suddenly she turned to see Raine` standing with a big grin on his face. She was hoping he just entered the path and wondered why she hadn’t heard the twigs breaking. Almost always when someone came through the path you could hear them. She stood there with a towel wrapped around her. Her bare feet and long tanned legs were a beautiful sight, thought Raine`. He said nothing but reached over and grabbed her. She was so responsive that she could feel the heat of her body with his every move. His kisses were warm and his hands took the towel from around her and it dropped to the ground. She had her hands on his bare chest as he only had on swim trunks. She could feel his hardness against her naked body. He slid his hand in back of her and gently slipped her onto the tall grass. As she fell back and was engulfed in his caresses, she reached to open his trunks and slipped them off. As she heard the sounds of the birds chirping in the woods, she was paralyzed by the warmth of him inside her. He hugged and kissed her and pulled her up. 25

They held each other for a moment and then walked back over to the shower where still in each other’s arms, they rinsed off. Claire almost didn’t make the sale of her fresh clams. They were just getting ready to shut the scales for weighing the clams. She had made enough money to repair the side deck of the house. It had come loose from the side of the house from the last storm. She was going to have a carpenter over to give her an estimate.

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Chapter 9 Claire couldn’t help but feel the loneliness without Raine`. He had gone into the city for a seminar which would last for three days, and she hadn’t seen Tina either. She was so annoyed with herself for giving herself to Raine`. She was thinking of his strong body and the warmness against her. She had felt so complete and so in love. As she kept herself busy around the house, she wondered if he would be back. She was becoming obsessed with what his involvement was with Tina. She wondered what he was doing with his spare time when he wasn’t at the seminar. She hadn’t heard from him, and she longed for his touch. She remembered when they were teenagers they would kiss for hours after the football games. Then they were separated by college years.

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Chapter 10 The days were beautiful. Claire was on a two week vacation, and she spent time blueberry picking and then walking through the wildlife center. She went swimming every day and walked the shore to see if she could find anything else about her mother’s death. She had a heavy heart when she thought of the sadness of her death, and in her own mind the possibility of a suicide. The sandy point had shifted and the pull of the water at the point was going in the opposite direction. She wondered how her mother was found at the opposite side of the point. The point was facing the other way when she was found up against the jetties. The people from the sandy point area all knew how the point shifted, and her mother was well aware of the dangerous undertow at the point.

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Chapter 11 It was rumored that Raine` and Tina spent the weekend at a nearby resort. Claire thought she never wanted to see him again. She was so hurt; her chest felt like a Mack truck was on top of her. She couldn’t even cry. Why would he make love to her and then go away with another woman? She had been used, she thought. For the rest of the week, she kept busy painting the kitchen and making curtains for the bay window. She was so absorbed in the house she never even went to the clam bake. Ned had dropped by a few times. He was constantly at the tax assessor’s office. She wondered what he was up to. He had gone into Boston. It seemed he had relatives that lived out under the bridge. It was a small cove where a few families had homes on the bay. Ned never talked much about his family. She knew his mother had died and he never said much about his father. She was always glad to see Ned. He was so fine and so handsome. He was always joking with her. He had eyes that were dark as coal. They would shine when he laughed. “When are you going on your next assignment?” he asked. “You seem to be having such a good time fixing up the house.” Little did he know she was crying inside. “I have another week,” said Claire. Ned waved goodbye. He seemed to be in a hurry. Claire was sure that Raine` was after the estate so he and Tina could get married and expand the vineyard. The fog horn was sounding in the background as Claire got onto the ferry boat that would take her to the mainland where the city library was. She planned on spending the morning at the library, and then taking a walk in the park. She was looking up family names. They had a department something like England’s Sommers House famous for tracing family trees. She wanted to find out more about the name on the death certificate of the mystery 29

woman in her dad’s life. As she was at the desk reading through some of the books she looked up to see Ned leaving the building. She quickly followed his steps, watching him meet up with a woman unknown to Claire. They both got into a car and drove off. The next day Raine` was pounding on Claire’s door. He noticed a note that read she would be away for a while. The keys were at the real estate office. Claire decided to take a short holiday. She was going to New York to see a friend. Years ago she had worked at Mt. Sinai Hospital and a few of her friends still lived in New York. She was deep in thought thinking how she never wanted to see Raine``s face again. She hoped if she stayed away long enough he would leave and marry Tina, and Claire would go on with her life. Claire sat in the high rise apartment overlooking the Hudson River and decided to do more of her own investigating into her mother’s accident. She was sure it had something to do with the papers she found. Where had this other woman been all these years and who was she? After staying a weekend in New York, Claire drove back to Rhode Island and decided to put a trace on the woman her father had buried. No one had known about this but Claire. She wanted to talk to Ned. She felt he was the only one who would listen. She had to try to put the pieces together.

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Chapter 12 Raine` seemed as though he was lost in thought. He was waiting to talk to Claire alone. He had an envelope she might need. He picked it up by the hammock when going across the property. The hammock was in the backyard, set in between two big maple trees. There was brush and rose bushes nearby, also a few chairs and a bird house made by her dad that was hanging from one of the trees. Her mother always went in the back to sit on the hammock and sew. She had just completed the bridesmaid dresses for her friends daughter’s wedding. The wedding was to take place in the big old church on the hill in back of her house. She was getting very excited to see how the dresses would look on the girls. As Claire looked into the envelope her face became ashen. It was a letter from another woman expressing that she had an affair over twenty five years ago and that she had become pregnant, unknown to Claire’s father, and had a son named Ned. Claire’s father’s twin brother had had the affair, and after he died, the woman wrote to Claire’s father. The letter went on to read that the woman was very ill and soon to die, and hoped he would meet her once again. Ned was now living in the New England area and had a business in Texas. Claire was devastated. She had hoped Raine` had not read the letter. This could have some bearing on the paid funeral papers she had found and explained the presence of Ned. He must be doing some detective work himself. The pieces were starting to fit together. How terribly sad. “Oh, Ned, how unfortunate that we were never together as kids,” she thought. “How sad for you to have lost your mother and father. I hope we can make it up and stay close always.” A few months had gone by. Claire was just home again from another assignment. She had taken care of a little girl who had contracted the measles. She was being given medication for a fever and suddenly started having seizures 31

at home. The paramedics were unable to stabilize her by the time they were summoned. She now lay in a coma in the hospital. Her beautiful eyes with her very long dark eyelashes were the only flicker of hope for the family. Her hair was jet black and she was in a fetal position. She was given nourishment through her feeding tube. After months of the grandmother keeping vigil at her crib side, rosary in hand, the little angel Jennifer died in her sleep. She would never ever be forgotten by Claire. Claire was mentally exhausted from this assignment as she came to love this little angel. The grandmother had sent her a beautiful note of thanks and that was a permanent reward. Raine` made several attempts to see Claire but she didn’t want to see him. Her heart was saddened. It felt like a heavy weight. She was unable to cry. She had been in love with Raine` for a long time. She was sure he was going to purchase the estate and then marry Tina. Tina seemed to be his constant companion. Claire went over to the courthouse the next day to see if she could find some information as to who this other woman was. She went over to the funeral director to inquire. He was very evasive. He would get back to her as he had to make arrangements for services that were to be held in the afternoon. Claire excused herself and told him she would be back.

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Chapter 13 It was a warm day with a sea breeze coming off the shore. There were a few small crafts tied up to the nearby dock and Claire decided to have lunch in the café by the oceanfront. As she looked out over the bay, she saw Raine`’s boat pull up and she could see his strong arms tying the rope to the old dock. He was preoccupied and didn’t look up. He passed by the café and never saw Claire staring at him. Her appetite was gone. She finished her cool drink and left feeling very lonely.

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Chapter 14 As she reminisced about Raine`, she almost forgot Ned was coming by. Ned was at the door, daisies in hand. He looked gallant in his blue shirt and white slacks. The shirt was fitted and she could see his chest muscles move as he reached out to give her the flowers. As she looked for a vase, she turned around to see him looking out the bay window at a flock of sea gulls. The gulls were flying in back of a small fishing boat. They were such scavengers, she thought. The daisies were beautiful and she was so delighted to receive them. Claire noticed Ned’s slack were tight against his strong slender legs down to his white shoes. He looked handsome with his jet black hair waved back against his tanned skin. Now she knew why she didn’t feel any sensations when he was around. He talked her into going for a walk along the beach and then to dinner on a moonlight sail. She was excited, as it had been a long while since she had dinner on the boat, and she was very comfortable with Ned. They talked over dinner oblivious that Raine` and Tina were also on the boat. Ned noticed them and waved. Claire looked up to see Raine` fixing the strap on Tina’s sun dress. Tina looked radiant in a fuchsia dress with her hair short against her face. She was so engrossed with Raine`, she thought, that she didn’t even look up to acknowledge Ned and Claire. It upset Claire so much that she spilled her drink all over her dress, and as the glass hit the deck and broke, she looked up only to see Raine` smiling. Her dress was stained. She had bought a beautiful pale blue off the shoulder dress from a small shop near the bay earlier in the day. Ned helped her wipe up the drink and told her she still looked beautiful. Her hair was pulled back and she had blue daisies around her swept up hair. Her skin was tanned and her delicate smooth face with small lips and eyes that were so bright you could see the sadness in them. Ned asked her to dance. The band 34

was playing on into the night, and she and Ned danced in the moonlight. Soon she forgot about Raine` and Tina being there.

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Chapter 15 A few weeks had gone by and people were in and out of the house. Some of the people were prospective buyers and some fancied to see the estate. Claire decided to lock up the house and go for a walk along the beach. As she climbed the jetties and looked down into the water, she saw a shiny object. She climbed back down off the jetties and walked into the water and reached down. To her surprise, it was a charm, and on it was inscribed, “Colette with love, Kourtier.” Kourtier was her father’s family name. She put the charm in her pocket and went back up on the jetties and stared out over the bay. It was a beautiful day, sunny and hot with white puffy clouds overhead. There were a few small crafts going by and Claire was on the jetties a long time just thinking about the charm she had found. Was Colette Ned’s mother? Had her mother thought her father was having the affair? The water was cool and Claire swam out to the dock. The puffy clouds overhead were moving along with the wind and she could not help but think what a beautiful day it was in spite of her sorrow. Ned was at the dock having just come in from a boat ride. He called to her and asked if she would like to go to the café and have a cool drink. She was happy to see Ned. He was always so comforting. Ned handed her a gold tarnished piece. Claire was engrossed with the inscription. Her heart started to race. It was a medal of honor for resuscitation of a woman who was saved from suicide. The woman wanted to end her life as she was unable to deal with the sudden death of her husband. The house was filled with gas and the woman was found with her head in the oven. The man who saved her climbed the fire escape after having been summoned by a neighbor. That man was Claire’s father. What was Ned doing with the medal, and how was he connected? Ned went on to tell Claire his dad was an orphan and his dad’s brother was the only one who could be found to 36

call when Ned’s mom was distraught. Ned had not known the man who saved his mother’s life was his uncle until he did all this research recently. His mother had been in a state of depression for years and five years ago had a sudden heart attack and died. Claire’s father had been called, and since there was no money at that time, he made arrangements for Ned’s mother’s funeral. He knew Claire thought her father had had an affair after she told him about the envelope she received, and Ned knew he should tell her. He had been following Claire and knew she was getting closer to the truth herself. They weren’t aware there was a twin brother which explains why Ned resembled her father. Claire’s mother probably did think her father was having an affair not knowing about the twin brother and after the envelope was found, she was considerably shaken and went out for a swim. The sand bar moved and she was just not able to get back to shore.

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Chapter 16 The seagulls were on the big rock and the sound of the waves as they hit the shore was very enjoyable to Claire. She was preparing for the firemen’s ball which was a yearly event. She was painting a picture of the gulls on the jetties and she would donate this to the fair. She was a very talented artist. She thought someday she would have more time to paint. The real estate office called to tell Claire that there was an offer she couldn’t refuse. The offer was from a gentleman who wanted to remain anonymous for now. Her heart felt like it stopped. Her stomach ached. She was sick. She really did not want to sell. If only there was some way she could keep the estate. She would have to negotiate. In the meantime, Ned became very ill. He had high fevers and a very congested cough. She went to see him at Providence General Hospital a few times a week. He looked very frail and had gotten much thinner. She noticed sores on his lips and he was choking up phlegm. He had intravenous solutions going and his eyes were closed. She kissed him on the forehead and left. She wasn’t sure if Ned would ever come home. Claire woke up to the sounds of the bull dozers clearing the back lots of the vineyard. The sounds were getting closer and she knew it would only be a matter of time and even her estate would be turned over to the owners of the vineyard. They needed more property as the vineyard was doing better than expected and there was even a wine now that was specifically made from the grapes of this vineyard. Looking out over the land you could see grape vines for miles. They were closed in by wire fences, with helpers picking the grapes to be made into the “Island Wine.” The vines were so tall and the pickers were under the vines being careful not to get scratched by the thorns. Earlier during the year, Ned had a thorn hit his cornea and was in the hospital for almost a month on intravenous antibiotics for 38

a major infection to his eye. He scratched his cornea and was waiting for a possible transplant as he had blurred vision now. Claire was so sad she hadn’t seen or heard from Raine`. She had heard rumors that Raine` was very interested in buying out the owners of the vineyard and expanding the business. Tina was also a nurse and doing private duty care for Ned who was now home. He seemed to be getting better. Tina was seen walking slowly up and down the beach with Ned who was stopping occasionally to catch his breath. He would say, “Why am I not getting stronger?” Claire talked with Ned and gave him some encouragement for self-help.

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Chapter 17 Finally the hustle of the firemen’s ball arrived and everyone was in and out of the ball room. Around the room were long tables with crafts that were to be raffled off during the dance. There was a galley in the back room where a big dinner was being made for the people who wanted to have something to eat before the dance. The proceeds from the dinner would go towards the purchase of fire equipment for the new truck. People were lining up talking and laughing. The children were also invited and they were running all around buying tickets at the raffle. There were lots of children’s’ games to be raffled off. There was to be an auction after the ball. The auction was outside up on the hill near the ballroom. There would be lots of antiques at the auction. As Claire looked out the window, she could see Raine` walking towards the ballroom. He was in a tan shirt and dark brown slacks. His hair fell in waves almost down the back of his neck. His dark tan was probably from being in the last two sailboat races. He spent a lot of time on his boat. She wondered where Tina was. Her long time friends arrived to go over to the ball with her. She was dressed in a lilac dress. It was low cut against her breasts and showed off her tan. Her long lanky legs were an asset as her dress was cut short above her knees. She had on the pretty sandals that Raine` had given her. Her hair was pulled back and tied with a lilac ribbon and she felt good about the way she looked. She hoped Raine` would notice her. The ballroom was noisy and there were people gathered in groups talking. The band was getting ready to play. Raine` immediately saw Claire and walked over to greet her. Their eyes met with such electricity that it seemed there was no one else in the room. As he pulled her close in a very gentle way, the music made for a very romantic mood. Claire had a feeling her knees were weakening and she wondered if Raine` could hear the pounding of her heart. Raine` did not

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speak but held her close and they glided softly along the dance floor. The band drummed up a tune and there was a silence. The man in front of the microphone had an announcement to make. The owner of the vineyard would be able to make the best wine and sell it for a big profit. After seven years, the vines had produced such beautiful delicious grapes and everyone was cheering and clapping. Claire could only feel her head echoing the sound of applause. She was devastated to hear Raine` was the new owner. She could feel the blood drain from her head. She was feeling faint and she had to get out of the crowd. She pulled away from Raine` and ran out through the crowd. She was running so fast that she did not know that Raine` was not far behind her. She ran to her favorite part of the woods up to the vineyard and as she looked up, she saw lights along the fence that lit up a sign which read, “Marry me Claire, I love you.” As she was gasping for breath, she felt arms around her waist and as she spun around, her eyes were gazing into his and he had the biggest smile on his beautiful sweet face. “This is all for you. The estate is now our home, our vineyard. The vineyard will pay off the estate in a few years. I’m crazy about you and I love you.” Claire was so happy. “I’ve loved you for so many years,” she said. As he kissed her, she felt like the sea breeze was blowing gently through her, and as he gently lowered her onto the soft grass, they were oblivious to the sound of the lighthouse horn bellowing in the background. He kissed her all over her face and his hands felt her breasts as they became hardened and sensitive to his touch. As he made his way down her tanned legs, she was so responsive to his hands that they made love in the grass. With an exhilarating warm sensation from her heart, she reached up, held his face in her hands and gazing into his blue eyes, she said, “Yes, my darling, I will marry you.” They hugged each other and now they both could hear the sound of the lighthouse horn ringing against the roar of the waves hitting the shore line. They turned to each other 41

and Claire felt the warmth of his lips pressing lightly on hers, and thought to herself how completely happy she was to be so in love.

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About the Author Janet Mahn, AKA Jan Edwards, resides in Northwest Indiana. She is originally from New Jersey. She has dabbled in writing since she was a young school girl. She has published a biography of walking through chemotherapy, “I Climbed a Mountain,” that was published in a fiction magazine. During a long struggle with cancer, she published a children’s book, “Beautiful Angels,” with the proceeds going to St. Judes. She has also completed a murder mystery, “Crossroads to Murder,” which will be published soon.

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