Poems,prose

  • May 2020
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1: What I think: You think jus cos someone says so I have to obey, don’t you, well let me tell you, I wont, and I don’t, come what may. I don’t care that I mustn’t do thus, do that, conform, REform, hmmf, I don’t care, don’t care, come what may. You say, do the right thing, who told you what’s the right thing, your mum, your dad, your dam aunty Fay. Well I say, I don’t care, don’t care, come, what may. Ha, you say that’s it my boy, that’s the way to go, stick to the status quo, what’s that, do You even know. The thing is you see, I’m gona be, who, and what I wana b, I jusst don’t care about your rules, your dam limitless expectations. What they decided long before you were born, what to do, AND say, well FREAK that, I jusst, don’t care, I just, don’t care, come, what may. 2: An ode to love: My first love I remember so clear, intense it was, yes that’s the past you hear. Her name I cannot mention, not cos of fear or of resention. But cos I’ll hold it dear, her name, our love, I would cherish forever. It was so passionate, so smouldering. Hearts, souls, bodies intertwined, in an endless dream, love Divine. It might seam like these are just words to you, but every word is true, not everyone goes through, what I did, only but a few. The train for entrance at loves gate, spans vast distances and narrow she be. Few get past that gate that’s barred, the longer the toil the lesser the lard. So when that gap begins to grow, one must move to and fro. Cos on the other side you’ll see, heaven and wonders and ecstasy. So if like me your brow was wet, don’t worry your ultimate prize you’ll get. Your mate, in desperate wait, is just on the other side. Now she’ll wipe your brow and kiss you gently with loves delight. And hold her gently in your bed tonight, cos love, true love is a wondrous site. 3: Hurt: Hurt is how I feel right now, do you see it, how you make me feel, what the hell, what’s your problem, what the hell’s your deal. Do you ever stop to think what you done. Used to call you sweetie baby, my love, damn even hun. But now look what you have done, u made me run, look for that (rum). Took one shot, then two. Then all I knew, the bottle was done. Now look what you done, ina bed, seeing red. She’s lying next to me, that’s right, next to me I said.

4: Nameless: You my heart, my immortal soul, you’re my everything, my unattainable goal. Through waters galore I will swim, I will dive, to your heart my destination, I will arrive. Why do you hide from me, your thoughts, if I was rich, every one of them, would be bought. Darling my love you are, why does this distance have to be so far.

But this I swear come rain come storm, our love making everyday will be the norm. To you I swear oh fair maiden so far, I will travel even though I don’t have a car. But to get to you I would do so much, you see my love will drive me, and my hearts my guide, wherever you may be, wherever you may hide. 5:Beware: I know you hear it, it’s the sound of fear, I know you see it, I’m coming for you my dear. Beware you go out, without no dread, I’m out you see, and I’m not yet fed. Be cautions when you see where nothing grows, it’s my nature you see, not a seed will grow. What you reap you see, what you reap ye shall sow. My soul is empty, you can tell that by what you see in my eyes. In my domain you’ll hear, only moans and gut wrenching cries. I wait you see, I wait in the dark, they’ll not find you, but I’ll leave my mark. There’ll be a circle you see, a circle with a face. The police will search, but will find no trace. You’ll be with me you see, in my domain, suffering innumerable tortures, and unforetold pain. Why u ask, why’d I chose you, cos you were never there, never there in the pew. That’s right, that’s why I came. You see a deal was made, long before you were born, now your soul is mine, my fireplace to adorn. So beware I say, I say beware. You might jus be next, jus collecting my fare. 6: Hus da DAWG: Awe awe, Hosh hosh exse. A dawgs a dawg, so please beware. I’m a dawg, so don’t even TRY and stare. My chrome is shiny and I just don’t care. WILL cos a fight, right here, right now, all you’ll be saying, is ooo ooo, owww owww. I don’t give a damn who’s wrong who’s right, I’m a dawg woof woof, bite bite. And pray to god, yes pray with all your might, that me and my dawgs don’t get you in the night, cos angels don’t tread where I just might. My nights are filled with darkness, filled with dread. Still my only concern is my dawgs get fed. Don’t get in MY way, please don’t get in ours, what’s below is you, what’s on top is flowers. Took us long to get you there, took bloody hours. The lesson is this you see, this you didn’t learn. What’s yours is mine and what’s theirs is ours. My dreams are riddled of the past event, this life’s not yours, this life you rent. Duck, hide hide, here they come, it’s your turn now. Clang clang, pow, pow and darkness falls. The life you rent is at its end. This one’s all you got, no more to lend.

Your choice you made, you made it alone, your consequences you’ll get, so please don’t moan. No one to phone, no lawyer to call, no one to fight, HERE I COME, WOOF WOOF, BITE BITE.

5: PAIN! Hurt, anguish I feel, do you feel it, will make you lean over and keel. Seems so surreal, unpleasant, so unreal. Why would you do, what you do, if you knew how you devastate. Do you know how long it takes to heal? Firstly conceal, then you gotta deal. Deal with that which brings to hate. Wait hate comes before you deal, anyway that’s how I feel. That’s how it goes hurt and pain, and you think you no, words they go to and fro. Heard that before have you, you might have, maybe once before. Do you feel that hurt do you feel still sore. Well let me tell you its gonna bore and bore right into your soul. Your heart will harden. You’ll say f you, what did you say and I beg your pardon. Words you’ll use for weapons of gore. To the one, your ex, the one you use to adore. Now this goes on and on and on and sometimes, sadly forever will past. Your heart impervious to cupids dart. But that one day may come when rays of hope they shine, that’s when you meat your love divine. Now don’t be scared. Don’t be shy. Go to her don’t you ever lie. Be truthful that’s important. Be open; share your entire mind. And be this above all, please be kind. Bundle of Joy: The day we met I saw your face. Was sunshine, joy, your skin like lace. Your eyes are mine, that is clear. Your nose hers, your lips mine, your hair mine, and curly it is. She says it’s straight, like hers, but as you can see, that’s up for debate. It took a while, after many sleeps, a smile emerges that lights a room. Brings sunshine and joy to the deepest gloom. I tell you this when I first heard another addition was gonna be added. Thought this was the worst thing that could happen at that very time. You see, that very period, my love and I were very short of the dime. Yes, very very trying a time.

Thinking back on those troubles in mind, of how we had to just toil and grind. The one thing that wipes all of those away is your first smile, which will in our hearts stay. So thank you GOD thank you from my heart. Thank you for another wonderful start. Beware: I know you hear it, it’s the sound of fear, I know you see it, I’m coming for you my dear. Beware you go out, without no dread, I’m out you see, and I’m not yet fed. Be cautions when you see where nothing grows, it’s my nature you see, not a seed will grow. What you reap you see, what you reap ye shall sow. My soul is empty, you can tell that by what you see in my eyes. In my domain you’ll hear, only moans and gut wrenching cries. I wait you see, I wait in the dark, they’ll not find you, but I’ll leave my mark. There’ll be a circle you see, a circle with a face. The police will search, but will find no trace. You’ll be with me you see, in my domain, suffering innumerable tortures, and unforetold pain. Why u ask, why’d I chose you, cos you were never there, never there in the pew. That’s right, that’s why I came. You see a deal was made, long before you were born, now your soul is mine, my fireplace to adorn. So beware I say, I say beware. You might jus be next, jus collecting my fare. Nameless2: How do I adore her, well I’m gonna tell you. Joh, she be fine, she be hot. Oh me gawd, a lot she has, a lot she got. Why do I adore her, oh man you gota know. She’s my love, my friend, my darling to the end. When I see her, oh how I do soar. I soar here there, even in between of that I am sure. Did you ever meet a girl, couldn’t take your eyes of her, stared at, like forever, millimetres away your lips are. Forehead touching, staring, smiling. Gawd, I tell you. Two days or one and a half, but damn I tell you but just don’t laugh. I love this girl, nameless’ her name, never bloody ever, man, will I ever be the same. What I’m trying to say, and here this bloody well, a girl like that’s kak hard to find. So keep her happy, treat her the best ever, and I mean ever, this I do tell. Crush: My cousin and I are getting done. He brushes his hair, I wet mine. She’s waiting already, her eyes are green. We both like her, but I’m the one against whom she leans.

Now he’s seeing green, but I don’t really care, cos she’s the one who’s stolen my stare. My hearts in a quarter mile, my engines blaring. I want her to be the one for whom I’ll forever be caring. My hearts a flutter and I never want it to stop, all she makes me do is flounder and stutter. We’re laying next to each other, my cousin on her other side. He’s kissing her cheek; I’m doing the same. She pushes him away, his feeling like a geek. I hold her hand as we walk away, could this not last forever, and a day. We alone now, no one can see, she smiling, I’m smiling; we filled with happiness and with glee. I look in her eyes she returns my glance, I move closer, so does she and we kiss, just by chance. Oh how wondrous joy, oh how fantastically life can be. Shout shout, scream scream. I want everyone to know. Sorry cousin my love I have to show. Now it’s time to go, she has to go inside. This wave of happy thoughts is mine to ride. I can’t sleep, cos all I do is think, when can I hold you, nameless, when can our lips meet. Tomorrow holds excitement and mystery, to bad I’m just thinking back and all this is all history. Mustang: Clickety clickety, clickety bang. I’m driving around, just stole my dads 75 mustang. It’s red with a few spots of rust, but I don’t care, I’m 13, and everyone else is eating my dust. Around the corner at 97, damn this car feels like heaven, Left again, now right then right. Down that avenue, this baby sure sits tight. OOOO, look there, there’s Betty-Sue. Ja that’s the girl every guy lines up for, and stands in cues. Hey Betty, wana have a ride, come sit here baby, right here by my side. Damn, damn, damn, she’s in the passenger seat, my hearts a skipping to a thunderous beat. Where you wana go Betty-Sue my sweet babe, well Terence, could you please drop me at my dear uncle Abe’s. Well how’s about you an I make a turn, there behind ole Granvilles ta-vern. Sure Terence , but whatever are we gonna do. Don’t worry Betty, I just wana get to know you. Yes that was me, the radio teaches well, hope to God my dad aint gonna whip me straight to hell. My arms around her neck after my fake yawn, I lean in for the kiss and there he stands.

What the, f*##, are you doing in that car Terence, guess it’s time to take you to your parents. Damn damn damn almost, guess my butt in a minute, is gonna look an feel like toast. After a week of chores and allowances rebuked. You might wonder was it worth it, was it divine? Well err, Betty-sue is now all mine. Darkcraft: Wickety, bubbeterty,wickety, dee, there’s that old woman, evil is she. She’s cleaning the floor with an ancient black broom, look at her fat cat, fiddling with that loom. What’s she doing now, in that big black pot, don’t believe it what she doing with that cot. Cleaning the window to get a better look, now I’m worried, what’s in that big old black book. Dust is everywhere in every cranny. What’s going on in that head of that hunched up old granny. What’s she doing now, damn, she’s searching for me. I got to hide now, I really got to flee. I think I know now, where to hide, my trusty wand is by my side. Come in I said, come it the house, I have washed the child; look at you, dirty as a mouse. What’s in your hand, oh it’s your toothbrush? Damn you dirty have you been playing in the sand? Come along I have been cooking all day, you have had your time to go out and play. The house is dusty, told you to close the doors, and my cook book, 100 meals, by Dorothy Loors. Nature: Sunshine brings such marvellous wonders The rains the storms the deafening thunder. When I look out on a beautiful day. I smile instinctively. Everything’s brighter, everything shines. It even brings out sum poetic lines. The dawn of spring and everything’s reborn. The trees, the grass, the dears’ little fawn. It sometimes makes one weep to see such beauty. Yeah natures a fox, a real hot cutie. From time to time she causes a ruction, from 10 foot waves, to storms and violent destruction. But as we learn form death comes new life, but only from humans, death may come from a knife.

Yes, violence and beauty go hand in hand, yet sometimes it takes centuries to understand. What we humans don’t know we humans do fear, oops, my bad, extinct is the dear. We kill to look good, we kill for food, we even kill to lighten our mood. Now this I say and hear it good, nature no longer will be taken for a ride. Many and many for her will have died. So thank God for the trees, thank God for the sky, thank God for the lions who live in a pride. Open your arms, open your heart, a new day is dawning from which we can have a fantastic new start. Independence: She be hot she be fine what lies under those close boggles the mind Is it sugar is it spice, wonder if she be naughty or nice. Does she bite or does she like ropes, hope she the kind of girl that likes picking up the soap. Not knowing her name won’t be a shame. One night of pleasure, yeah, she’ll never be the same. For that smile I’d gladly take the blame. Time for her to go and never return. Out of my site and out of my mind, wonder who’s next on my list to be grind. Pssst…Pssst: Hay there, please don’t stare. Look ahead, don’t look my way. I got something to share; it’s life or death. Take is slow calm your breath. I don’t want to scare you, just to inform. I’m not usually like this, it’s out of the norm. Well I’m going to tell you, just please relax. I’m here to help you, to be your friend. Really darling, it’s not pretend. You see what’s got me bothered, I’m beginning to shed, is that damn tarantula on your head. This hurt a little so don’t be scared. Going to hit you hard with this book I got, you have to trust me, or your head’s going to rot. I’m really really, I do apologise, I’m allergic to big big spiders, err I forgot. To live life: To live life is what I really want to do, I don’t want fame, but the money, the power, really don’t care about having a name. I want what I want when I want it. No more getting my bank balance to see if I can afford, I want that prestige, I want to be a lord. The ladies that come with, that now is a good perk, really I’m hoping I don’t turn into a jerk.

Money changes people and that we know, they put on heirs and love being the life of the show. I don’t want that, I want to be me, but plus everything else, that’s going to make me free. Can you imagine just saying these words, I can have whatever I want today, no worries, visa will pay. How bout Greece, Venice or Spain, leave your umbrella, where we going it’s not going to rain. Imagine a life with a continual summer, driving around in your H3 hummer. Nice hay, but will you miss the rain, to wash out the air or your soul that’s been a little stained. I guess that probably goes hand in hand, the parties, the booze, the ladies, let’s hope I don’t turn out like one of those crazies. Now drugs I have avoided all of my life. Well maybe a little green here and there but hay otherwise I’m clean. That’s one thing I swear I won’t do. Miseries in life, of them I want few. Don’t want to add to life’s woes, many days are to be had, don’t want many with sorrow. So I’ll live my life with blissful forget, adoring, loving, spending with absolutely no regret. Christmas All Over Again: One shot, two shots, three shots, 4. Nock nock, guess that’s Santa, again, at my door. He visits often now, too often if you ask me. Then he bloody goes in the corner, and just takes a pee. He likes his whiskey he says, well he likes three, but who am I to judge him, like they judge me. I want him to go now, but his out cold, don’t want to put him out, his really, really old. Gonna be on his naughty list, or so I’m told. It’s 3am, and his on the roof, hoe hoe hoe, hay hay hay. Damn Santa, it’s the middle of May. Now people are talking, asking weird questions, oh damn, what they saying is, Santa and I are gay. Guess that’s a sign, for Santa to go. No this is goodbye Santa, not bloody hallo.

The choice is yours: Mystery deceives, the heart shall reveal. All that you conceal, may simply not be real Fear in you heart, hurt in your soul, most of that is simply out of your control. So why not be free, you just have to decide. Those you hide, it may just be pride. Pride can be good sometimes, but we always need help. When you do decide to be happy, forget all that pride, ‘cos happiness begins form the inside. When you been keeping that all to yourself, for all that time, it’s to do anything else. Change is hard, harder that you think. Sometimes, most of the time, what seems to help, is to drink. The problem with that is that is doesn’t last, not being permanent it is but a farce. Strange that it seams that the choice is obvious, but change is difficult, like an uphill battle. We don’t like it, when our cages get rattled. I know what can help, it brings great change. To smile, just to smile. Just smile more often, and I promise, just that smile, your heart and others will soften. My advice is true, it’s true from the heart. Enjoy a new start, life can be good, make that choice, you’ll see it really works. Happiness is reachable. The choice is yours. Destined to be: Destiny. Always in the back of your mind you feel something trying to tell you of something. You don’t know what it is, but you know it’s real. You want to know, but the time aint right. What’s this thing you have to do, do you have to fight? Fight for a cause, fight for this world, you just don’t know But it’s there I can feel it, it’s real. Am I mad, am I, the one? Does everyone feel the way I do? Am I alone in my mind, my lonely asylum of thoughts and dreams? Is it the escape of a life not lived or a life lived in pain? Is this the ranting of the one, insane? What’s there to gain from dreams? Don’t they blossom hope, making you want something that you know has the odds in the opposite favour? Aah, but to dream. Does GOD love a dreamer? I’ll keep my dreams, I’ll savour them. My madness might make me unique and in turn making me the one. Maybe my destiny is to reach sanity.

Or maybe, just maybe this is plain unbridled vanity. But what I do know is what I feel. All this pain must have a hidden reason. Does anyone deserve it, season after season. GOD, there’s got to be a reason. Yes, a destiny it must be. All the hardship in preparation for a life of leadership, a life moulded for greater things. Maybe, just maybe, money, power, a life of kings. Destiny. It’s what I crave. Too long has this life made of me her slave. Time to be brave, oh yes it’s a fight. Fight for my freedom, a fight for what’s right. An end to pain and end to hopelessness. A beginning. Passion, power and enviable bliss. Be ready world, it is written. I’m coming to fulfil and age old song, of joy or wilful destruction. Only time will tell. But come it will.