Persona Reflection

Personal Reflection

Personal Reflection of my Idea of Teaching Ashley Overstreet Georgia Southern University

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Personal Reflection

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At the beginning of this semester I began classes in the pre-professional block in order to become a teacher one day. This experience was going to be a completely new change from my normal pace of college classes. This was my first semester after deciding to become a teacher. I was in my third year of college in the Justice Studies program here at Georgia Southern and decided that was not the field I wanted to pursue. I loved the Justice Studies classes, but I was terrified of what job I would actually be able to have one day. I knew that I did not want to become a police officer, probation officer, or work in a prison. Everyday I woke up and wondered if Justice Studies was my correct major choice. Most students in this field do not know what they would like to pursue after college, but they do know it is something dealing with the law or the legal process. Choosing to become a Justice Studies major was very easy for me. I worked at a court while I was in high school. After I graduated high school I chose to keep my job, and take college classes at night. I worked at the court for approximately four years. Last June I married my high school sweetheart, and moved away from my hometown to the county where my husband is currently employed. Now I am working for an attorney firm and attending Georgia Southern. These jobs made it easy for me to choose the Justice Studies program at Georgia Southern. I loved it at the court and I love my current job, so why not follow the field that comforted me the most. During last semester my mind began to wonder if I had made the correct choice. I had always thought about teaching but followed the area that was most familiar. I made a huge decision and changed my major to Secondary Education. I had wasted a whole year of school but I had to try something new. I feared that I would not have a job that I felt comfortable in after graduating. I also wanted to teach so that I could become a role model. My work experiences have allowed me to work with many criminals who do not care for you or themselves. Teaching would give me the chance to make a difference in a child’s life.

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I work up early in the morning and could not wait to attend my first pre-professional block course this class was going to be something new and interesting. After my first class I had fallen in love with teaching and decided that I had chose the correct major. A couple of weeks passed and I loved the classes and my teachers. I was learning new things and ideas. I was intrigued by the thought of myself teaching. I attended the orientations for field placement, and was very excited to be placed in a classroom. The big day was here and I was nervous but anxious to go to the high school. I was placed at a school with the middle and high school sharing the same campus. The principle shared the responsibilities of both schools, but maintained keeping the students separated. My first day went really well, but I was troubled by the relaxation of the classroom. I was a Secondary Political Science major but placed in a math class. This class consisted of about fifteen students. Of the fifteen I believe six or seven were considered Special Education students. The teacher had been teaching for many years but was very pleasant. She had her own teaching and discipline style. In the mornings during the principle’s announcements over the intercom students talked continuously. Having my observations at this school I felt I needed to know what was happening at the school, but did not feel brave enough to ask my teacher to have the students stop talking. Students constantly walked around the room while she was teaching a lesson. Students went to the bathroom without asking. This behavior seemed so terrible. After the first day I realized maybe this was how the teacher was able to make the students listen. As I stated above many of these students were considered Special Education students. The reasons for this classification varied from student to student but I learned quickly their attention span was very short. After going to the school for a couple of weeks my idea of teaching changed drastically. I realized it was not the behavior of the students that was bothering me so much it was the thought

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of having to handle all of these problems one day as a teacher. I began dreading going to the school. While observing I would put myself in the place of the teacher and I knew this was not the career for me. My work experience thus far has been working at a desk and having to deal with paperwork. This paperwork does not talk back, it does not ask thousands of questions, and something so unimportant as leaving for lunch is possible. As a teacher my responsibility would be so much greater. After analyzing all of my options I decided to drop the field experience and change my major back to Criminal Justice. This change was very easy. I do not have any regrets. I feel a teacher must be a person who is one hundred percent committed to the students and profession. I know that I would have been a teacher who was burned out after a couple of years. I felt it was not fair to me or any students that I would have had to continue in the field without my heart. Teaching requires so much more than most people realize. I think many of the currently enrolled students in the teaching field have not had a lot of work experience. I think this contributes to why they feel so comfortable in this major. If you do not know what it is like to have a lot of freedom within in a job you do not realize what you are missing. This reflection is very hard for me because now I do not want to become a teacher. I am going to reflect on the idea of how I would want to teach, and why these things contribute to my decision of not pursuing teaching. If I were going to become a teacher which pedagogical paradigms would I place myself within? I would situate myself in the transmissionist and constuctivist paradigm. I feel when students need to pay full attention to the teacher, and what she is trying to convey the transmissionist style is ideal. In classes such as math I feel students learn more efficiently with desks lined in rows and the teacher in front. Math is a subject that students must give full

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attention to the teacher. It involves many steps most of the time and if idea is the entire problem seems confusing. In Stand and Deliver, Jaime Escalante, the teacher had his class in rows with him in the front teaching. “A transmission-model classroom looks like what you might think of as traditional or conventional: teacher in front, students in rows.” (Murphy 2004). In a math class you need your students to pay direct attention to you and the lesson being taught. I felt he was an excellent math teacher. He wanted his students to learn things they were unexpected to be able to learn. He taught a group of students Calculus against all odds. Even though the desks were aligned he made the classroom into a big area of learning. All students participated and he walked the aisles making the classroom more relaxed. If I were going to become a teacher one day I would like to have the traits of Jaime. He enjoyed his job. He felt his students had the knowledge to learn anything he taught them. I would want to be proud of my students and teach them new and exciting ideas beyond their normal expectancy, but I fear this would be a problem. I think I would get frustrated after a student was told over and over how to do a problem and still continued to get the problem incorrect. I am afraid I would not have the patience needed to become a teacher of Jaime’s quality. Jaime allowed students to come to his home and study. I think I would not have the caring quality of Jamie. I have too many fears of what may happen if students were to come to my home. I think people would talk about me, students may take advantage of my home by vandalizing things, or I would not have the capacity to put forth this much effort. I am married and want to have children one day. I want to discipline and deal with my children’s problems. I do not think I would like to deal with children that were not my own on an every day basis. Jamie loved kids at all times of the day. One of the most important aspects of teaching is that you must enjoy children in general. Patience is a necessity when working with children. Jamie had so much patience.

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In the movie Dangerous Minds, the teacher Louanne Johnson seemed to fit within the constuctivist view. She did have students in rows within the classroom but these rows turned into students sitting on top of desks, dancing, and singing. She had control of the classroom but the students talked continuously. Classroom discussion was very open and opinionated. She did not follow the normal curriculum of the school, but rather taught poetry based on what the students lives were centered around. She made the students realize that poetry is very important and you can learn a great deal about life through poetry. Ms. Johnson stood up against the principal and other administrators for her students. I feel as a teacher I would like to be the constuctivist model and Ms. Johnson. I feel while working with students you strive and their ideas even if this is against the norm. This idea is why teaching is not for me. I have always following the phrase “by the book”. This means if something is in writing and a standard is set, I would not break it. To be a teacher I think you have to learn to bend the rules in order for your students to trust you and your teaching style. I think students must feel secure within your classroom, and they want to know that you will believe in them even if this means going against the administration. It is very easy for me to place myself in the transmissionist or constuctivist style but actually carrying out one of these styles of teaching is totally unrealistic. I feel both of these styles of teaching require a person who is going to give their entire heart to the profession. Teaching is not a profession that you can remain happy with unless you enjoy working with students. I feel that my future is in the area of adults and paperwork not students and lesson plans. I enjoy working with people but I do not feel that working with students will bring out my best qualities. I hope that the profession I pursue will one day bring out my best qualities. I hope that I will be the transmissionist and constructivist of that profession. I hope I will be the person that everyone admires and wants to model.

Personal Reflection References Murphy, S. L,. Johnson, T.S., Hundley, M., Sanford, A., Bickmore, S., & Zoss, M. (2004). Pedagogical paradigms in English education. Available from the Building Resources: Induction and Development for Georgia Educators website, www.teachersbridge.org.

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