Our Duties Towards Our Children(7!14!06)

‫‪Khutbah on “Our Duties to Our Children – Part 2” / By AbuSamihah Sirajul Islam‬‬ ‫‪)Brooklyn Islamic Center (07.14.2006‬‬ ‫المد ل الذي أنعمنا بنعمة اليان والسلم‪ ،‬وجعلنا خي المم أخرجت للنام‪ .‬أشهد أن ل إله إل ال وحده ل شريك له و أشهد أن ممد عبده‬ ‫و رسوله‪ ،‬البعوث رحة للعالي‪ .‬الذي أرسله بالدى و دين الق ليظهره على الدين كله و كفا بال شهيدا‪ .‬بلغ الرسالة‪ ،‬أدى المانة‪ ،‬وجاهد ف‬ ‫ال حق جهاد حت أتاه اليقي‪ .‬اللهم صلي على هذا النب المي‪ ،‬وعلى آله وصحبه أجعي‪ ،‬ومن تبعهم بإحسان إل يوم الدين‪.‬‬ ‫سِلمُونَ‪ .‬يَا أَّيهَا النّاسُ اّتقُوْا رَّبكُمُ اّلذِي َخلَ َقكُم مّن ّنفْسٍ وَا ِحدَةٍ وَ َخلَ َق مِْنهَا َزوْ َجهَا‬ ‫يَا أَّيهَا اّلذِي َن آمَنُواْ اّتقُوْا اللّهَ حَ ّق ُتقَاتِ ِه وَ َل َتمُوتُنّ ِإلّ َوأَنتُم مّ ْ‬ ‫ث مِْنهُمَا رِجَالً َكثِيًا وَِنسَاء وَاّتقُوْا اللّهَ اّلذِي َتسَاءلُو َن بِ ِه وَا َلرْحَامَ ِإ ّن اللّهَ كَانَ َعلَْي ُكمْ َرقِيبًا‪ .‬يَا أَّيهَا اّلذِي َن آمَنُوا اّتقُوا اللّهَ َوقُولُوا َق ْولًا َسدِيدًا‪.‬‬ ‫وََب ّ‬ ‫صلِحْ َل ُكمْ أَ ْعمَاَل ُكمْ وََي ْغفِرْ َل ُكمْ ذُنُوَب ُك ْم َومَن يُ ِط ْع اللّهَ َو َرسُولَ ُه َف َقدْ فَازَ َف ْوزًا عَظِيمًا‪َ .‬عمّا بعد‪ .‬فأن خب الديث كتاب ال‪ ،‬و خي الدى هدي‬ ‫ُي ْ‬ ‫ممد (صلى ال عليه و سلم) و شر المور مدثاتا و كل مدثة بدعة و كل بدعة ضللة و كل ضللة ف النار‪ .‬ثا عما بعد‪ :‬قال ال تعال‪ :‬أَّيهَا‬ ‫ك فَُأ ْولَئِكَ ُهمُ اْلخَاسِرُو َن‬ ‫اّلذِي َن آمَنُوا لَا ُت ْلهِ ُكمْ َأ ْموَاُلكُ ْم َولَا َأ ْولَادُ ُكمْ عَن ذِكْ ِر اللّهِ َومَن َيفْعَلْ َذلِ َ‬ ‫‪63:9 O ye who believe! Let not your riches or your children divert you from the remembrance of Allah. If any act thus, the loss is‬‬ ‫‪their own.‬‬

‫‪Brothers and Sisters,‬‬ ‫‪The topic for todays khutbah is “Our Children’s Rights on Us.” We did talk about certain rights of our‬‬ ‫‪children last week. Today, insha’Allah, we shall talk about certain other specific rights that our children‬‬ ‫‪deserve from us. We shall start with the time they are born.‬‬ ‫‪Children’s Right Before their Birth: – Choosing a righteous wife to be a righteous mother.‬‬

‫ت الدّي ِن‬ ‫صلّى اللّ هُ َعلَيْ ِه وَ َسّلمَ قَا َل تُْنكَ حُ اْلمَ ْرأَةُ لَِأرْبَعٍ ِلمَالِهَا َوِلحَ سَِبهَا وَ َجمَاِلهَا َوِلدِيِنهَا فَا ْظفَرْ ِبذَا ِ‬ ‫عَ نْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَ َة رَضِ يَ اللّ هُ عَنْ هُ‪ :‬عَ نْ النِّبيّ َ‬ ‫ت َيدَا َك‬ ‫تَرَِب ْ‬

‫‪It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings‬‬ ‫‪of Allaah be upon him) said: “A woman may be married for four reasons: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty‬‬ ‫‪and her religious commitment. Marry the one who is religiously committed, may your hands be rubbed with‬‬ ‫‪dust (i.e., may you prosper).” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 4802; Muslim, 1466).‬‬

‫‪Rights after the child is born:‬‬ ‫‪1 – It is Sunnah to do tahneek for the child when he is born:‬‬ ‫ت ِلَأهِْلهَا لَا ُتحَ ّدثُوا َأبَا َط ْلحَةَ بِاْبنِ هِ َحتّى أَكُو نَ َأنَا أُ َح ّدثُ هُ قَالَ َفجَاءَ َفقَ ّربَ تْ إَِليْ هِ عَشَاءً َفَأ َكلَ َوشَرِ بَ فَقَالَ ُثمّ‬ ‫حةَ مِ ْن ُأمّ ُسَليْ ٍم فَقَالَ ْ‬ ‫ت ابْ نٌ ِلَأبِي َطلْ َ‬ ‫عَ نْ َأنَ سٍ قَالَ‪:‬مَا َ‬ ‫ب ِمْنهَا قَالَتْ يَا َأبَا َط ْلحَةَ أَ َرَأيْتَ َل ْو أَنّ َق ْومًا َأعَارُوا عَا ِرَيَتهُ ْم َأهْ َل َبيْتٍ َف َطَلبُوا عَا ِرَيَتهُمْ‬ ‫ت َأنّ هُ َقدْ َشبِ َع َوأَصَا َ‬ ‫صّنعُ َقْبلَ ذَلِكَ َفوَقَ َع ِبهَا َفلَمّا َرأَ ْ‬ ‫سنَ مَا كَانَ تَ َ‬ ‫صنّ َعتْ لَ ُه أَحْ َ‬ ‫تَ َ‬ ‫صلّى اللّ هُ َعَليْ هِ وَسَّلمَ َفأَ ْخبَرَ هُ ِبمَا‬ ‫ب وَقَا َل تَ َر ْكِتنِي َحتّى َتَل ّطخْ تُ ُثمّ أَ ْخبَ ْرِتنِي بِاْبنِي فَاْنطَلَ قَ َحتّى َأتَى رَ سُولَ اللّ هِ َ‬ ‫سبْ اْبنَ كَ قَالَ فَ َغضِ َ‬ ‫أََلهُ ْم أَ ْن يَ ْمنَعُوهُ مْ قَا َل لَا قَالَ تْ فَا ْحتَ ِ‬ ‫صلّى اللّ هُ َعَليْهِ وَ َسلّ َم فِي سَفَ ٍر َوهِ يَ َمعَ ُه َوكَا َن رَسُولُ‬ ‫ح َملَتْ قَالَ فَكَا َن رَسُولُ اللّهِ َ‬ ‫كَانَ فَقَالَ رَسُو ُل اللّ هِ صَلّى اللّهُ عََليْ ِه وَ َسلّمَ بَا َر َك اللّ ُه لَ ُكمَا فِي غَابِ ِر َلْيَلتِ ُكمَا قَالَ َف َ‬ ‫صلّى اللّهُ‬ ‫حةَ وَاْنطَلَقَ رَسُولُ اللّهِ َ‬ ‫صلّى اللّهُ َعَليْهِ وَسَّلمَ ِإذَا َأتَى اْلمَدِيَنةَ مِ ْن سَ َفرٍ لَا َيطْ ُرُقهَا طُرُوقًا َف َدنَوْا مِنْ اْل َمدِينَةِ َفضَ َرَبهَا اْل َمخَاضُ فَا ْحُتبِسَ َعَلْيهَا َأبُو َط ْل َ‬ ‫اللّهِ َ‬ ‫ستُ ِبمَا تَرَى قَالَ َتقُولُ أُمّ سَُلْيمٍ يَا َأبَا‬ ‫جُبنِي أَ ْن أَخْرُجَ مَعَ رَسُولِكَ إِذَا خَرَجَ َوأَ ْد ُخلَ مَعَهُ ِإذَا دَ َخ َل وََقدْ ا ْحَتبَ ْ‬ ‫ك َلتَ ْعلَمُ يَا رَبّ ِإنّهُ ُي ْع ِ‬ ‫َعَليْ ِه وَ َسّلمَ قَا َل يَقُولُ َأبُو َط ْلحَ َة ِإنّ َ‬ ‫ت لِي أُمّي يَا َأنَ سُ لَا يُ ْرضِعُ هُ أَ َح ٌد َحتّى َت ْغدُ َو بِ هِ َعلَى رَ سُولِ اللّ هِ‬ ‫ض حِيَ َقدِمَا َفوََلدَ تْ ُغلَامًا فَقَالَ ْ‬ ‫حةَ مَا َأ ِجدُ اّلذِي ُكنْ تُ أَ ِجدُ اْن َطلِ قْ فَاْنطَلَ ْقنَا قَا َل َوضَ َرَبهَا اْل َمخَا ُ‬ ‫َط ْل َ‬ ‫سمٌ َفلَمّا رَآنِي قَالَ َل َعلّ أُمّ ُسلَْيمٍ وََلدَ تْ ُقلْ تُ نَعَ مْ‬ ‫صلّى اللّ هُ َعَليْ ِه وَ َسلّ َم قَالَ فَ صَادَ ْفُت ُه وَمَعَ ُه مِي َ‬ ‫صلّى اللّ هُ َعلَيْ هِ وَ َسلّمَ َفَلمّا أَ صْبَحَ ا ْحَت َم ْلتُ هُ فَاْن َطلَقْ تُ بِ ِه إِلَى رَ سُو ِل اللّ هِ َ‬ ‫َ‬

‫جوَةِ اْل َمدِينَةِ َفلَا َكهَا فِي فِي هِ َحتّى ذَابَ تْ ُثمّ َقذََفهَا فِي فِي‬ ْ ‫جوَةٍ مِ نْ َع‬ ْ ‫صلّى اللّ هُ عََليْ هِ وَ َسلّمَ بِ َع‬ َ ِ‫سمَ قَا َل وَ ِجئْ تُ بِ هِ َف َوضَ ْعتُ هُ فِي َحجْ ِر هِ وَ َدعَا رَ سُولُ اللّ ه‬ َ ‫َف َوضَ عَ اْلمِي‬ ِ‫ب اْلَأنْصَا ِر الّتمْرَ قَالَ َفمَسَحَ وَ ْج َههُ َو َسمّاهُ َعْبدَ الّله‬ ّ ‫صلّى اللّ ُه عََلْيهِ َوسَّلمَ اْنظُرُوا إِلَى ُح‬ َ ِ‫صبِ ّي َيتََل ّمظُهَا قَالَ فَقَالَ َرسُولُ الّله‬ ّ ‫صبِيّ َفجَ َعلَ ال‬ ّ ‫ال‬ It was narrated that Anas ibn Maalik (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The son of Abu Talhah was sick. Abu Talhah went out and the child died, and when Abu Talhah returned he said, “What happened to my son?” Umm Sulaym (his wife) said, ‘He is quieter than he was.” Then she brought him his dinner and he ate, then he had marital relations with her, and when he finished she said, “They buried the child.” The following morning, Abu Talhah went to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and told him what had happened. He said, “Did you have marital relations last night?” He said, “Yes.” He said, “O Allaah, bless them.” She later gave birth to a boy. Abu Talhah said to me, “Keep him until I bring him to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him).” He brought him to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and I sent some dates with him. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) took him and said, “Is there anything with him?” They said, “Yes, some dates.” The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) took some and chewed it, then he took some from his mouth and put it in the child’s mouth (tahneek), and named him ‘Abd-Allaah. Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5153; Muslim, 2144 2 – The child should be given a good name, such as ‘Abd-Allaah or ‘Abd al-Rahmaan. ِ‫ب َأسْمَائِ ُك ْم إِلَى الّلهِ َعبْدُ اللّ ِه َوعَْبدُ الرّ ْح َمن‬ ّ ‫صلّى الّلهُ عََلْيهِ َو َسلّمَ إِنّ أَ َح‬ َ ِ‫قَالَ َرسُولُ الّله‬:َ‫َعنْ اْب ِن عُمَ َر قَال‬ It was narrated from Naafi’ that Ibn ‘Umar said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The most beloved of your names to Allaah are ‘Abd-Allaah and ‘Abd al-Rahmaan.” (Narrated by Muslim, 2132) It is mustahabb to give the child a Prophet’s name: It was narrated that Anas ibn Maalik said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “A child was born to me last night and I called him by the name of my father Ibraaheem.” Narrated by Muslim, 2315 It is mustahabb to name the child on the seventh day, but there is nothing wrong with naming him on the day of his birth, because of the hadeeth quoted above. It was narrated from Samurah ibn Jundub that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Every child is in pledge for his ‘aqeeqah which should be slaughtered for him on the seventh day, his head should be shaved and he should be named. 3 – to provide love and compassion Prophet Muhammad never held back his love for the children and always expressed his fondness to them. In one hadith Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated:

‫َنن أَب ِي هُرَيْرَ َة قَا َل‬ ْ ‫ِمن ع‬ ٍ ‫ْنن مُ ْطع‬ ِ ‫ْنن جُبَيْ ِر ب‬ ِ ‫ِعن ب‬ ِ ‫َنن نَاف‬ ْ ‫ْنن أَب ِي َيزِيدَ ع‬ ِ ‫ّهن ب‬ ِ ‫َنن عُبَْي ِد الل‬ ْ ‫سنفْيَانُ ع‬ ُ ‫ْنن أَب ِي ُعمَ َر َحدّثَن َا‬ ُ ‫َحدّثَن َا اب‬ ‫ع ُثمّ انْ صَ َرفَ حَتّى أَتَى‬ َ ‫ق بَنِي قَيُْنقَا‬ َ ‫صلّى اللّ هُ َعلَيْ هِ وَ َسلّ َم فِي طَائِفَ ٍة مِ نْ الّنهَارِ لَا ُي َكّلمُنِي َولَا ُأ َكّلمُ هُ حَتّى جَاءَ سُو‬ َ ِ‫ت مَ عَ رَ سُولِ اللّ ه‬ ُ ْ‫َخرَج‬ َ‫سعَى َحتّى اعْتَنَ ق‬ ْ َ‫سلَهُ وَُتلْبِ سَ ُه ِسخَابًا َفلَ مْ َيلْبَ ثْ أَ نْ جَاءَ ي‬ ّ َ‫ِخبَا َء فَاطِمَ َة َفقَالَ أََثمّ ُلكَ عُ أََثمّ لُكَ ُع َيعْنِي حَ سَنًا فَظَنَنّا أَنّ ُه إِّنمَا َتحْبِ سُهُ ُأمّ هُ لِأَ ْن ُتغ‬ ‫ب مَنْ ُيحِبّ ُه‬ ْ ‫صلّى اللّهُ َعلَيْهِ َو َسّلمَ الّل ُهمّ إِنّي أُحِبّ ُه فََأحِبّ ُه وَأَحِْب‬ َ ‫كُلّ وَا ِحدٍ مِْن ُهمَا صَا ِحبَهُ َفقَا َل َرسُولُ اللّ ِه‬ I went along with Allah’s Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) at a time during the day but he did not talk to me and I did not talk to him until he reached the market of Banu Qainuqa`. He came back to the tent of Fatimah and said, “Is the little chap (meaning Al-Hasan) there?” We were under the impression that his mother had detained him in order to bathe him and dress him and garland him with sweet garland. Not much time had passed that he (Al-Hasan) came running until both of them embraced each other, thereupon Allah’s Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “O Allah, I love him; love him and love one who loves him.” (Muslim) Anas ibn Malik (may Allah be pleased with him), the servant of the Prophet, had another recollection:

‫ب َو ُمحَ ّمدُ بْ نُ عَْب ِد اللّ ِه بْ ِن ُنمَيْ ٍر وَاللّفْ ظُ لِزُهَيْ ٍر قَالَا َحدّثَنَا إِ ْس َمعِيلُ َو ُهوَ ابْ نُ ُعلَيّةَ عَ نْ أَيّو بَ عَ نْ َعمْرِو بْ ِن َسعِي ٍد‬ ٍ ‫َحدّثَنَا زُهَيْرُ بْ نُ حَ ْر‬ ‫صلّى اللّ هُ َعلَيْ هِ وَ َسلّ َم قَالَ كَانَ إِْبرَاهِيمُ مُسْتَرْضِعًا لَ هُ فِي َعوَالِي‬ َ ِ‫ مَا رَأَيْتُ أَ َحدًا كَا نَ َأرْحَمَ بِاْلعِيَا ِل مِ نْ رَسُولِ اللّ ه‬:َ‫س بْ ِن مَالِ كٍ قَال‬ ِ َ‫عَ نْ أَن‬ َ‫اْل َمدِينَ ِة َفكَا نَ َينْ َطلِ قُ وََنحْ ُن مَعَ هُ فََيدْخُلُ الْبَيْ تَ َوإِنّ ُه لَُيدّخَ ُن وَكَا نَ ظِئْرُ هُ قَيْنًا فََيأْ ُخذُ ُه فَُيقَّبلُ ُه ُثمّ يَرْجِ عُ قَالَ َعمْرٌو َفلَمّا ُت ُوفّ يَ إِبْرَاهِي ُم قَال‬ ِ‫ي وَِإنّ لَ ُه لَظِئْرَيْنِ ُت َك ّملَانِ رَضَاعَ ُه فِي اْلجَنّة‬ ِ ْ‫صلّى اللّهُ َعلَيْهِ َو َسّلمَ ِإنّ إِْبرَاهِيمَ ابْنِي وَإِنّهُ مَاتَ فِي الّثد‬ َ ‫َرسُولُ اللّ ِه‬ I never saw anyone who was more compassionate towards children than Allah’s Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him). His son Ibrahim was in the care of a wet nurse in the hills around Madinah. He would go there, and we would go with him, and he would enter the house, pick up his son and kiss him, then come back. (Muslim) The Prophet’s love for children was not restricted to his children and grandchildren. The scope of his mercy and affection embraced all children, and he showed the same interest and gentleness to his Companion’s children. The following hadith narrated by Usamah ibn Zaid (may Allah be pleased with him) shows this humane aspect of the Prophet’s personality:

َ‫حدّ ثُ عَ ْن أَبِي عُْثمَا ن‬ َ ‫حدّ ثُ عَ نْ أَبِي ِه قَا َل َس ِمعْتُ أَبَا َتمِيمَ َة ُي‬ َ ‫َحدّثَنَا عَْبدُ اللّ ِه بْ ُن ُمحَ ّم ٍد َحدّثَنَا عَارِ مٌ َحدّثَنَا اْل ُمعَْتمِرُ بْ ُن ُسلَْيمَا َن ُي‬ ُ‫خذِ ِه وَُيقْ ِعد‬ ِ ‫صلّى اللّهُ َعلَيْ ِه وَ َسّلمَ يَأْ ُخذُنِي فَُي ْقعِدُنِي َعلَى َف‬ َ ِ‫ كَا َن رَسُولُ اللّه‬:‫حدّثُهُ أَبُو عُْثمَانَ عَنْ أُسَامَةَ بْ ِن زَْيدٍ رَضِيَ اللّهُ عَْن ُهمَا‬ َ ‫الّن ْهدِيّ ُي‬ ‫خذِهِ اْلأُخْرَى ُثمّ َيضُ ّم ُهمَا ُثمّ َيقُولُ الّل ُهمّ ارْ َح ْم ُهمَا فَإِنّي َأرْ َح ُم ُهمَا‬ ِ ‫حسَ َن َعلَى َف‬ َ ‫اْل‬

Allah’s Messenger used to put me on (one of) his thighs and put Al-Hasan ibn `Ali on his other thigh, and then embrace us and say, “O Allah! Please be merciful to them, as I am merciful to them.” (Bukhari) Some people who were not able to understand the power of expressing love to children wondered why the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) played with children and took such an interest in them. Narrated Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him),

‫صلّى‬ َ ِ‫ قَبّ َل رَسُولُ اللّه‬:َ‫َحدّثَنَا أَبُو الَْيمَانِ أَخْبَرَنَا ُشعَيْبٌ عَ ْن الزّهْرِيّ َحدّثَنَا أَبُو َسَلمَةَ بْنُ عَْبدِ الرّ ْحمَنِ َأنّ أَبَا هُرَْيرَةَ رَضِيَ اللّهُ عَنْ ُه قَال‬ ِ‫ت مِْنهُمْ َأ َحدًا فَنَظَرَ ِإلَيْه‬ ُ ْ‫اللّهُ َعلَيْ ِه وَسَّل َم اْلحَسَ َن بْنَ َعِليّ وَعِْندَهُ الَْأقْ َرعُ بْ ُن حَابِسٍ الّتمِي ِميّ جَالِسًا َفقَالَ الَْأقْرَعُ ِإنّ لِي َعشَرَ ًة مِنْ اْل َوَلدِ مَا قَّبل‬ ُ‫صلّى اللّهُ َعلَيْهِ َو َسّلمَ ُث ّم قَا َل مَنْ لَا يَرْ َح ُم لَا يُرْ َحم‬ َ ‫َرسُولُ اللّ ِه‬ Allah’s Messenger kissed Al-Hasan ibn `Ali while Al-Aqra` ibn Habis At-Tamim was sitting with him . AlAqra` said, “I have ten children and have never kissed one of them.” The Prophet cast a look at him and said, “Whoever is not merciful to others will not be treated mercifully.” (Al-Bukhari) The Prophet was always patient and considerate with children and took great pain not to hurt their tender feelings.

ِ‫صلّى اللّهُ َعلَيْه‬ َ ‫ب بِْنتِ َرسُولِ اللّ ِه‬ َ ‫صلّى اللّهُ َعلَيْهِ َو َسّلمَ كَا َن ُيصَلّي َو ُهوَ حَامِلٌ ُأمَامَ َة بِْنتَ زَيَْن‬ َ ِ‫ َأنّ َرسُولَ اللّه‬:ّ‫عَنْ أَبِي قَتَادَةَ الْأَْنصَارِي‬ ‫ض َعهَا َوإِذَا قَامَ َح َملَهَا‬ َ َ‫ج َد و‬ َ ‫س فَإِذَا َس‬ ٍ ْ‫ص بْنِ رَبِيعَ َة بْنِ عَْبدِ َشم‬ ِ ‫َو َسّلمَ َولِأَبِي اْلعَا‬

Narrated Abu Qatadah: “The Messenger of Allah came towards us while carrying Umamah the daughter of Abi Al-`As (Prophet’s granddaughter) over his shoulder. He prayed, and when he wanted to bow, he put her down, and when he stood up he lifted her up.” (Al-Bukhari/Muslim) In a another hadith,

‫صلّى اللّ هُ َعلَيْ ِه‬ َ ِ‫ أَتَيْ تُ رَ سُو َل اللّ ه‬:ْ‫َحدّثَنَا حِبّا نُ َأخْبَرَنَا عَْب ُد اللّ هِ عَ ْن خَالِ ِد بْ ِن َسعِيدٍ عَ نْ أَبِي هِ عَ نْ ُأمّ خَالِ ٍد بِنْ تِ خَاِلدِ بْ ِن َسعِيدٍ قَالَ ت‬ ُ‫صلّى اللّ هُ َعلَيْ هِ وَ َسلّ َم سَنَ ْه سَنَ ْه قَالَ َعْبدُ اللّ هِ وَهِ يَ بِاْلحَبَشِيّةِ حَ سَنَةٌ قَالَ تْ َفذَهَبْ تُ َأْلعَ ب‬ َ ِ‫صفَ ُر قَا َل رَ سُولُ اللّ ه‬ ْ ‫وَ َسلّ َم مَ عَ أَبِي وَ َعَليّ َقمِي صٌ َأ‬ ‫صلّى اللّ هُ َعلَيْ ِه وَ َسّلمَ أَْبلِي َوأَ ْخِلقِي ُثمّ أَْبلِي‬ َ ِ‫صلّى اللّ هُ َعلَيْ ِه وَ َسّلمَ دَ ْعهَا ُثمّ قَا َل رَ سُو ُل اللّ ه‬ َ ِ‫ِبخَاتَ مِ النُّبوّ ِة فَزَبَرَنِي أَبِي قَا َل رَ سُو ُل اللّ ه‬ ‫َوأَ ْخلِقِي ُثمّ أَْبلِي وَأَ ْخِلقِي قَالَ عَْب ُد اللّهِ فََبقَِيتْ حَتّى َذكَ َر َيعْنِي مِنْ َبقَاِئهَا‬

Narrated Umm Khalid: I (the daughter of Khalid ibn Said) went to Allah’s Messenger with my father and I was wearing a yellow shirt. Allah’s Messenger said, “Sanah, Sanah!” (`Abdullah, the narrator, said that sanah meant “good” in the Ethiopian language). I then started playing with the seal of prophethood (between the Prophet’s shoulders) and my father rebuked me harshly for that. Allah’s Messenger said, “Leave her.” The Prophet, then, invoked Allah to grant her a long life thrice. (Al-Bukhari) 4 – The child’s rights with regard to education and upbringing: We have discussed this matter in our last khutbah 5 – Training in good manners and characteristics and providing a conducive environment for that: ْ‫صلّى اللّ هُ َعلَيْ هِ وَ َسلّمَ ُكلّ َموْلُودٍ يُوَلدُ َعلَى الْ ِفطْرَةِ َفَأَبوَا ُه ُي َهوّدَانِ هِ َأ ْو ُينَ صّرَاِن ِه َأوْ ُيمَجّ سَاِنهِ َك َمَثلِ اْلَبهِيمَةِ ُتْنتَ جُ اْلَبهِيمَةَ َهل‬ َ ّ‫ قَالَ الّنبِي‬:َ‫عَ نْ َأبِي هُ َريْرَ َة َرضِ يَ اللّ ُه َعنْ هُ قَال‬ َ‫تَرَى فِيهَا َج ْدعَاء‬ Narrated Abu Hurairah (RAA), he said: “The Messenger of Allah said: Every new born is in the natural state [of true religion]. Then it is the parents who makes him/her a jew or a christian or a Magian. It is like a baby cattle where you don’t see a deformity, but then people causes deformity in it.” [al-Bukhari] The father should bring them up with good manners in all things, eating, drinking, dressing, sleeping, going out of the house, entering the house, riding in vehicles, etc, and in all their affairs. He should instill in them the attributes of a good man, such as love of sacrifice, putting others first, helping others, chivalry and generosity. He should keep them away from evil characteristics such as cowardice, stinginess, lack of chivalry, lack of ambition, etc. 6 – Spending: This is one of the father’s obligations towards his children; it is not permissible for him to fall short in that or to neglect this matter, rather he is obliged to do this duty in the fullest sense.

ُ‫صلّى اللّهُ َعلَيْهِ َو َسّلمَ َكفَى بِاْلمَرْءِ إِْثمًا َأ ْن َيحْبِسَ َعمّ ْن َي ْملِكُ قُوتَه‬ َ ‫قَا َل َرسُولُ اللّ ِه‬

It was narrated that ‘Abd-Allaah ibn ‘Amr (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “It is sufficient sin for a man if he neglects those on whom he is obliged to spend.” 7 – Treating Children Justly:

َ‫صلّى اللّهُ َعلَيْ ِه َو َسلّم‬ َ ِ‫شهِ َد َرسُو َل اللّه‬ ْ ‫صدّقَ َعَليّ أَبِي بَِبعْضِ مَالِهِ َفقَاَلتْ ُأمّي َعمْرَ ُة بِْنتُ َروَاحَ َة لَا َأرْضَى حَتّى ُت‬ َ ‫ َت‬:َ‫عَنْ النّ ْعمَانِ بْ ِن َبشِ ٍي قَال‬ ‫صلّى اللّهُ َعلَيْهِ َو َسّلمَ َأَف َع ْلتَ َهذَا ِب َوَل ِدكَ ُكلّ ِه ْم قَا َل لَا‬ َ ِ‫ص َدقَتِي َفقَالَ لَ ُه َرسُولُ اللّه‬ َ ‫شهِدَهُ َعلَى‬ ْ ‫صلّى اللّهُ َعلَيْهِ َو َسّلمَ لُِي‬ َ ‫فَانْ َطلَقَ أَبِي ِإلَى النِّب ّي‬ َ‫ص َدقَة‬ ّ ‫قَا َل اّتقُوا اللّ َه وَا ْع ِدلُوا فِي َأ ْولَادِ ُك ْم فَرَ َجعَ أَبِي فَرَ ّد ِتلْكَ ال‬ “Fear Allah and treat your children [small or grown] fairly (with equal justice).” (Al-Bukhari and Muslim) From all the above hadith we see Prophet Muhammad’s attitude toward children is an example for the whole human race that shows how to treat them and cherish them at all He must also protect his sons and daughters from everything that may bring them close to the Fire. Allaah says:

َ‫ظ ِشدَا ٌد لَا َيعْصُونَ اللّ َه مَا َأمَرَ ُهمْ وََي ْف َعلُونَ مَا ُي ْؤمَرُون‬ ٌ ‫حجَارَةُ َعلَْيهَا مَلَاِئكَةٌ ِغلَا‬ ِ ‫سكُ ْم وَأَ ْهلِي ُك ْم نَارًا َوقُودُهَا النّاسُ وَاْل‬ َ ‫يَا أَّيهَا اّلذِي َن آمَنُوا قُوا أَن ُف‬

“O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who disobey not, (from executing) the Commands they receive from Allaah, but do that which they are commanded”

‫]‪[al-Tahreem 66:6‬‬

‫‪2nd Khutbah:‬‬ ‫‪Dear Brothers and sisters,‬‬ ‫‪Our children are a trust to us, as we discussed it last week. We need to take good care of this trust. If we fail to take good care of it,‬‬ ‫‪we will certainly be losers. This will be a zulm (oppression) on us. And Allah has prohibited all kinds of oppression. Allah wants‬‬ ‫‪us to be just and even in our behavior to fear him. So Fear him and be just in all your dealings, including raising your children.‬‬

‫ل تَتِّبعُواْ اْل َهوَى‬ ‫س ُكمْ َأوِ اْلوَاِلدَيْ ِن وَا َلقْرَِبيَ إِن َيكُنْ غَنِيّا َأوْ َفقَيًا فَاللّهُ َأ ْولَى ِب ِهمَا فَ َ‬ ‫يَا أَّيهَا اّلذِي َن آمَنُواْ كُونُوْا َقوّا ِميَ بِالْ ِقسْطِ ُش َهدَاء ِللّهِ َوَلوْ َعلَى أَن ُف ِ‬ ‫أَن َت ْع ِدلُوْا وَإِن َت ْلوُواْ َأ ْو ُتعْرِضُوْا فَِإنّ اللّهَ كَانَ ِبمَا َت ْع َملُونَ خَبِيًا‬ ‫‪O ye who believe! Stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to Allah, even as against yourselves, or your‬‬ ‫‪parents, or your kin, and whether it be (against) rich or poor: for Allah can best protect both. Follow not the‬‬ ‫‪lusts (of your hearts), lest ye swerve, and if ye distort (justice) or decline to do justice, verily Allah is well‬‬‫‪acquainted with all that ye do.‬‬

‫ضوَْنهَا أَ َحبّ ِإلَْيكُم مّ نَ‬ ‫شوْ نَ كَ سَا َدهَا َومَ سَاكِنُ َترْ َ‬ ‫خَ‬ ‫قُلْ إِن كَا نَ آبَاؤُكُ ْم وَأَْبنَآؤُكُ ْم وَإِ ْخوَاُنكُ مْ وََأ ْزوَا ُجكُ ْم وَ َعشِيَُتكُ مْ َوَأ ْموَالٌ اقْتَ َرفُْتمُوهَا وَِتجَارَةٌ َت ْ‬ ‫اللّ ِه َورَسُولِهِ وَ ِجهَادٍ فِي سَبِيلِ ِه فَتَرَّبصُواْ حَتّى َيأِْتيَ اللّ ُه بَِأمْرِ ِه وَاللّهُ َل َي ْهدِي اْل َقوْمَ اْلفَاسِ ِقيَ‬ ‫‪9:24 Say: If it be that your fathers, your sons, your brothers, your mates, or your kindred; the wealth‬‬ ‫‪that ye have gained; the commerce in which ye fear a decline: or the dwellings in which ye delight - are‬‬ ‫‪dearer to you than Allah, or His Messenger, or the striving in His cause;- then wait until Allah brings‬‬ ‫‪about His decision: and Allah guides not the rebellious.‬‬ ‫‪We need to continuously educate our children for Islam so as to develop their body, soul and mind. We‬‬ ‫‪have to continuously make du’a for our children. So lets make du’a to Allah (SWT) change our lot‬‬ ‫‪insha’Allah.‬‬

‫اللهم صل على سيدنا ممد وعلى آله ممد كما صليت على أبراهيم و على آل إبراهيم إنك حيد ميد‪ .‬وارض اللهم عن سادتنا أب بكر و عمر‬ ‫سِلمَاتِ وَا ُل ْؤمِنِيْنَ‬ ‫ب لَنَا مِنْ َأزْوَاجِنَا وَ ُذرّيّاتِنَا قُرّةَ أَعْيُ ٍن وَا ْج َعلْنَا ِللْمُّت ِقيَ ِإمَامًا‪ .‬الّل ُهمّ ا ْغفِرْ ِللْ ُمسِْلمِيْنَ وَالُ ْ‬ ‫وعثمان وعلي وعن صحابة أجعي‪ .‬رَبّنَا هَ ْ‬ ‫ك وَا ْخذُ ْل مَنْ َخذَلَ دِْينَ كَ ‪,‬‬ ‫ت ‪ ,‬الّلهُمّ انْصُ ْر مَنْ نَصَرَ دِيْنَ َ‬ ‫ب ُمجِيْبُ الدّ َعوَا تِ َوقَاضِيَ الَاجَا ِ‬ ‫ك َسمِْيعٌ قَرِيْ ٌ‬ ‫ت إِنّ َ‬ ‫ت الحْيَا ِء مِْنهُ ْم وَال ْموَا ِ‬ ‫وَا ُل ْؤمِنَا ِ‬ ‫ك و سُنّةَ نَبِيّ كَ‪ ،‬وعِبَادَ كَ‬ ‫ك وَكِتَابَ َ‬ ‫الّل ُهمّ أَعِزّ ال سْل َم وَالُ سِْلمِيْ َن وَأَذّ ّل الشّرْ كَ وَا ُلشْرِكِيْ نَ وَ َدمّرْ َأ ْعدَا َء الدّيْ نِ وَانْ صُرْ عِبَادَ كَ ا ُل ْؤمِنِيْ نَ ‪ .‬الّلهُمّ انْ صُرْ دِيْنَ َ‬ ‫لهَادِ‪ ،‬وِا ْقمَ عْ أَهْ َل الشّرْ كِ‬ ‫ا ُلوَ ّحدِيْ نَ‪ .‬الّل ُهمّ َوَأ ْظهَرِ ا ُلدَى وَدِيْ َن الَقّ اّلذِ يْ َبعَثْ تَ بِ ِه نَبِيّ كَ َعلَى الدّيْ نِ ُكلّ هِ‪َ ،‬ولَوْ كَرِ هَ ا ُلشْرِكِيْ نَ‪ .‬الّل ُهمّ َأقِ مْ َعلَ مَ ا ِ‬ ‫ك فِيْ كُ ّل َمكَا نِ‪ ،‬الّل ُهمّ‬ ‫وَالزّيْغِ َو الفَ سَادِ‪ ،‬وَاْنشُ ْر رَ ْحمَتَ كَ َعلَى العِبَادِ‪ ،‬يَا مَنْ لَ هُ الدّنْيَا وَا َلخِرَةَ َوِإلَيْ هِ ا َلعَادِ‪ .‬الّل ُهمّ انْ صُرْ ِإ ْخوَانَنَا ا ُلجَا ِهدِيْ َن فِ ْي سَبِْيلِ َ‬ ‫لمِ‬ ‫ض مِ نْ َتحْ تِ َأ ْقدَا ِمهِ مْ‪ ،‬وَا ْجعَ ْلهُ مْ َوَأمْ َوَلهُ مْ غَنِْيمَ ًة لِلِ ْس َ‬ ‫ب أَ ْعدَاِئهِ مْ‪ ،‬وَ َزلْزِلِ ا َلرْ َ‬ ‫ب فِ ْي ُقلُوْ ِ‬ ‫انْ صُرْ ُهمْ َعلَى َع ُدوّ كَ َو َع ُدوّهِ مْ‪ .‬الّلهُمّ َألْ قِ الرّعْ َ‬ ‫سِلمِيْنِ‪ .‬اللهم انصر إخواننا السلمي ف فلسطي الذين ضعفوا و ظلموا ف الليل والنهار اللهم ل مول لم ول ناصر إل أنت‬ ‫وَا ُل ْ‬ ‫ب الدّنْيَا الّل ُهمّ مَتّعْنَا‬ ‫ك َومِ نْ الَيقِيْ ِن مَا ُت َهوّ نُ َعلَيْنَا مَ صَاِئ َ‬ ‫ك مَا تَُبلّغُنَا بِ هِ جَنَّت َ‬ ‫ك َومِ نْ طَاعَتِ َ‬ ‫حوْ ُل بِ ِه بَيْنَنَا وَبَيْنَ َمعَا صِيْ َ‬ ‫ك مَا َت ُ‬ ‫سمْ لَنَا مِنْ َخشْيَتِ َ‬ ‫الّل ُهمّ َأقْ ِ‬ ‫جعَلِ‬ ‫جعَلْ مَصِيْبَتَنَا فِيْ دِيْنَنَا وَ َل َت ْ‬ ‫ث مِنّا وَا ْجعَ ْل ثَارَنَا َعلَى مَ ْن ظََلمَنَا وَانْصُرْنَا َعلَى مَنْ عَادَانَا وَ َل َت ْ‬ ‫ِبأَ ْسمَاعِنَا وَأَبْصَارِنَا َوُقوّتِنَا مَا أَحْيَيْتَنَا وَا ْج َعلْهُ الوَارِ َ‬ ‫سلّطْ َعلَيْنَا مَنْ َل يَرْ َحمُنَا‪.‬‬ ‫الدّنْيَا أَكْبَرُ َهمّنَا وَ َل مَْبَلغَ ِع ْلمَنَا وَ َل ُت َ‬ ‫صلِ ْح لَنَا دِنْيَانَا التّ يْ فِْيهَا‬ ‫صمَةُ َأمْرِنَا‪ ،‬وَا ْ‬ ‫صلِ ْح لَنَا دِيَْننَا الذّ يْ ُهوَ عِ ْ‬ ‫الّل ُهمّ ا ْغفِ ْر لَنَا خَ ِطيْئَتِنَا وَ َج ْهلِنَا‪ ،‬وَ إِ سْ َرفَنَا فِ يْ َأمْرِنَا‪َ ،‬ومَا أَ ْعلَ مُ بِ هِ مِنّا‪ ،‬الّلهُمّ ا ْ‬ ‫ت رَاحَ ًة لَنَا مِنْ كُ ّل شَرّ‪ .‬الّلهُمّ ا ْغفِرْ لَنَا مَا َق ّدمْنَا َومَا‬ ‫صلِ ْح لَنَا آخِرَتِنَا التّيْ فِْيهَا َمعَادِنَا‪ ،‬وَا ْجعَلْ الَيَا َة زِيَادَةً لَنَا فِيْ كُلّ خَيْرٍ‪ ،‬وَا ْجعَلْ ا َلوْ َ‬ ‫َمعَاشَنَا‪ ،‬وَا ْ‬ ‫أَخّرْنَا َومَا َأسْ َررْنَا َومَا أَ ْعلَنّا‪َ ،‬ومَا أَْنتَ أَ ْعَل ُم بِ ِه مِنّا‪ ،‬أَْنتَ ا ُل َقدّمُ‪ ،‬وَأَْنتَ ا ُلؤَخّرُ‪ ،‬وَأَْنتَ َعلَى كَ ّل َشيْءٍ َقدِيْرٌ‪َ ،‬ل ِإلَهَ إِلّ َأْنتَ‬

‫جوْدَنَا وَ َجمِيْعِ حَسَنَاتِنَا وَا ْجعَ ْلهَا خَالِصَةً ِلوَ ْجهِ كَ الكَرِيْمُ‪ .‬رَبّنَا آتِنَا فِي الدّنْيَا حَسَنَ ًة َوفِي ال ِخرَةِ حَ سَنَةً‬ ‫صلَتَنَا َوقِيَامَنَا َورُ ًكُوْعَنَا وَ ُس ُ‬ ‫الّل ُهمّ َتقَبّلْ مِنّا َ‬ ‫َوقِنَا َعذَابَ النّارِ‪ .‬سبحان ربك رب العزة عما يصفون وسلم على الرسلي وآخر دعوانا أن المد ل رب العالي‪.‬‬ ‫عباد ال‪ ،‬إن ال يأمركم بالعدل والحسان‪ ،‬وايتاء ذالقرب وينهى عن الفهشاء والنكر‪ .‬لعلكم تذكرون‪ .‬فاذكرو ال يذكركم‪ ،‬واشكرو على نعمه‬ ‫يزدكم‪ ،‬فاسألوه يؤتكم‪ ،‬ولذكر ال أكب‪ ،‬وال يعلم با تصنعون‬