Msft6001 Reading -beijing Sky

Atian .lewl 4 [email protected],2mt, vol. ENo Z I Z9_t52 O Tt Rolg KoS Prcf*ioD.l Cooeuiog Asiftoo & Tk chiEc Uniffiiry of floS floos 2m1

The Imprct of Live DemoDslrrfioD Under the Beijing Sky: Ite ShariDg of a TcacliDg Erperienc! in Chilr Wai_yungI_ec TrE U.j6ity

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thc coNultatioD of sir f.sjli.r,

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t€achiry €rFrienc€ iD Bcijing, shich uritizcd r tivc-faDily &nd.hiop md.t. This drict€ focus6 o. rb€Et ridship of rb. lhE di,mlioal e{coreldir th.iDt Dsityof Uvefdily id.rvic*s, i! *rdcn lh. frDili€s, i!. lb€rE isr !d rb. i,ri.@ all forn pets of dE ffially $qi!g aDdrEsheirg in.erFsodrl proces&A surnary of th. itldiocc fc.dbact is also itr.tudld to give a ses. of thc .lQors ftom ! ttqry of Fofqsion ls with diverscb€ctgbrrals. Altboogh a g€at dcal basb€€_n ',ritten on eoriing wilh Chitrcsefamilics in the Westcm sphere, fcw people will disputc that veiy liftle clinical infsnatioo on frmily th.ragy Fom tb€ China naiDtand is avaitabte lo thc Westem wo.ld. clict's

(1982) imprassion of China twcnty years ago sugg€stcdtha! thc p"ctice of family therapy wa3 vcry limit€d, if it cxisted al aI. HaDFe sDd B€avers' (1989) l4-day rrip to China offsed a more hopefirl eount ard reporied a sEong idrcrest in farnily rherapy h som€ C'binesccii€s, esFcialy BeijirS and Sheghai Howevcr, although Chinesc praclitioD.$ nay Doabcfir y awaE oftbc concepisand t chdqu€s offamily th.r4y in thc sane malrn€t lhat thc fhsrr.D weld hasd€fincd tbeio, sysacrDs paspedivc is not lcw ro Cod[| dst ChiD.- h a culrurc in which everyonc trt *ft.tfu6.din6isni+Gh.r.dorid*s.@io.,hrFlddidaddc.dd id.mtlin

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ue. Detunstrdi@ undet tha Beijins sla has somethingto do widr everyone else, iDdividuals md families re usedto turctioDin8 widin ltye6 of systemsovedaPping d.e,noiher

on SEuctural Family Therapy. The Beijing Wone!.s ColleSe (the fnsr univelsity for wonen in Chira), which hosted the evenl, had prepared a

whne the discussionsotr rhenpy wift Chines€families in lhe west still tend ro be theoretical and genedc, a review of indigerous literabre artong

oDe-waymtmr and rlte rcquiEd video e4uipmen! a professioml audience of over sirry individuals ircluding a number of graduaresfrom the Siro_ German plojar and sir famities tiDed up for consutrarion.

Chinesejomab in dE China mainland appea$to b€ mote dinicaly iDclined. A grcup of Chinesepsychiarists in Kltmirs published a Dumbq of anicler focusing on the appticarion ofsystenic Family Th€rapy telhniques. One of their srudies reviewed the work of 137 families at the Kunming Medical College and it was concludedthat the genenl techDiquesof SystemicFamily Therapyworied well wilh Chine,sefamihes(Ydg, Tug, Xiu, & ZEo, 199). Another study. focusiog specifically otr how the Sysiemic approach was used in the lreahe of 73 families witl enotionaly distuft€d yougsteE under 18 yeals ol4 also claimed a successrare of 86.3% (Yang, Znao, Tang,

It was not my irrentioD to show the audienceeother rieaimen! model, bul to build on *har tley had already leamen.Since they se€medro be more focusedon techniques.I was hoping 10expand tbeir perceprionof the coniexrualelemenrsin family retationships.This anicte erill atlem to share ny clinicaljoumey in rhis evenr! which was tater transformed inro a threeyei training coune cosponsoredby rhe Beijing Univenity, rhe New york Minuchin Center for fte Family, a.d rhe Hong Kong-basedMinuchin

& Xiu, 1999).These srudies seemedlo be more interestedin specific

Fou arion for tlle Family- Tl,e feedback from tbe panicipanrs will also be included to illusrrate their b€witdermeD! if not conJusion,in exposing

techniques introduced by the Milan leam in its eady days. Alrhough the

henserves to a more sponreeous way of conducting therapy.

definition for successdd ways !o er.amineil were not ciearly defined, the smple size for th.se studies was imprcssive and enviable.While the A.nerican joumals often ralk about the difficulties in engaging Chinese families in therapy, there was no mention ofthis kind ofproblem in the studies fmln the China mainland. T h e i n d i g e D o u sIi te ra tu re on fami l y therapy appearsto be overwhelmingly systenicaly oriente4 possibly due to the influence of lhe Sino-Germarproject -

a three'yearinining packageprovided by the

HeidelbergUoiveEiry- The prcj€ct membds in Cemay

virit€d ChiM twi@

thc First Crse The family consisted of a couple wirh two chitdren, one 2o-year old son ard a l4-year-old daught€r The ldentified Patient (Ip) was tbe husbrnd who had b€a hospiraliz€d for over a year for depression after he tost his compdny to his businessparher The Beijing Mental lDsdtution had a poticy, which encounged family nemb€rs to stay in the hospitat wirh rle parients. TherefoE, th€ *ife ofthis parieDrhad atso been living in the hospnat Since the wife had to accompany rhe husbaDdin the hospitat, thei daughrerwas sent to a t'oardirg s.hool_

a year io train a goup of aboul fony Chinesetherapists ftom ditrerent parts of China. Structural Fanily Ther-apyand some Boweniatr concepti were also meftioned in somediscussions(l€e, Du, & Doq 1998: Ni, Ji4 Lit! &

The couple ald rheir son anended rhe famity session.The young psychiatrist wbo atrendedro rhis family \ra5 also present.

Liu, 2000i Yang. 1995: Zhao & Xuaa 199). In the winter of 1998I arrivEnir Beijing to ctrd'rci a dleiay

130

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This first interview wirh a Beijing fanity was a rarher sureatistic expenencefor me. The building was dim and rhe B€ijing sbline is atways

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rjve Deno6iation U,.derke B.ijine Stq gray in winter. tn a small interview room vith no windoq lhe busband went on aDd oD with the story of his orded and betrayal by his business

I concluded rlle sessionby agre€ing with him that his daughter would inde€d be a b€trer "m€diciDe', for him tha. rhe hospital. I atso suggesledto

parrDe4a slory that semed a.I too familiar to his famity a'|d hjs Fycniftist. His wife still listened attentively, while the son looked uptighl and rcfused

the wife thar her busband woutd be.ome bend jf she began to trea! hi[l as a respoDsibleperuon a.d not as a patienr.

to tale pan in the conversaoon Apparendy the husbed had b€€n receiving a gear dql of iDdividuat aftention in the hospital. It s€€medthat he was so a@ustomedio hospital life that he had no intention of leaviry- His wife kept eDcouraginghim to rum over a n€\r leaf, but rhe husbdd dismissed her for not knowing how sick he was and began to conplain lo his doctor about his difrculty sle€ping

In the followiDg discussion, th€ audience of mostly trEle psychiaaisB and psychologistswbo had observed frorc a closed circuir televisio, €xpress€dpuzzlement. They wdr€d to lsnw 1fhy I arlendedso much to the wife when in fact r}le husbandwas the paiient. Some of them askedif I was 'rsing

the l)ar-adoxical,,nzneuv€r to bring about changes.If nor, why mt?

I explained rhat I was noi doing dFhing delib€rate to rh€ couple, nor did I rt to "libcrare the wonan,, as rhey Frceived. On rhe conirary, I was Half d hou iDto the session, it semed cleir that $e husband would only allow me to relale !o him as a sick p€rson, and I decided to tum to the

tryrng to 'ture lhe mm" as rhey had askedme to do. but I was using hjs wife

wife and askedwhat it was like fc her !o stay in tl|e hospital for sucb a long p€riod of tirne.At&ough lhe questioneas phns€d velv gendy,the discorDfct €ould be felt in rhe room. She said tha( she had to do it for her husband.But as I continued to explore her experience she begm lo pou oui her sorrow and frustution in being kept in a mentar hospit l while she was in perfect hdft.

AI things b€ing said, I was quire sure rlar my intenention failed ro activate the sysrem. Then one rnonth larer I received an e mail f.on the at|endng psychiatrist irforining me rhat the wife was plannirg to leave her husba.d. And after much negorjarion befween rhe husband and wife, rhe husbandtunlly left lhe hospiratand went home with her Our goal of getli,g him oDt of the hospital wd achieved unexperedly.

I was really not suE how far I could go with the husband dd wife. They soun&d rike a very traditional Chmesecouple.The husba

disrdss€d

his wife\ opinion continuously dd retused to iespond lo ber even though she pleaded with him- The wife seened so witling to accept a *condary position aDdto place her husband's needsfar above her oM. My only clue carne hon the son's silent anger toward his father, which gave me the

The scond casewas atso a cae refen€d from a rnental hospitat. The Ip was a sixr@r,year old son wbo had a diagnosisof ..schizopbjenia.,, His par€ntswere Commu.ist Party members.ard his norher in particular irnpr€ssedme as a very tough lady who had lived rhrougl ihe upheavalsof

panicularly revealilg wher the husband said that he missed his daughtd who was the "best n€dicine" for him, but irooicaly, due to his D€€dto slay

the Culbinl Revolution. Before I eDrerEdtbe session,I observedfron b€hind th€ one-way mirror rhar rhe young man was Erher agitared. pacing up and dow! th€ small room and flippirg his bards like a .psychoiic., patietrr, as

in the hospi(?l, she had b€€n senaaway-

describ€d by $e rcferring agenL

impressiotrthat the coupl€ ! way ofbei4

was not lefi uochaleoged- lt was

The S€cond CasG

Live DetuBnaian Undet theBeijin| StE However, io my geat surprise, he prcsented himself to me normally and showeda stroog inlerestin my questioos.He describ€da Lfe $ilh a sreat deal of difficulty at home and ar school. He said bis illness staned when he found himself failing to keep up wi$ the rest of his classmates. Since dEn, he had beenidtng at hom€ for three y€ars dEing which time he was in and out of hospiials and was giveD high dos€sof psychotropic drugs. TIle parentr werc in gl€ar despanasdlis was fien ody son.They consider€d hjm very obedient and parien! before he b€cane itl. This wrs an extremely hatrdsomeyoung man. wbeo I asked if he ever had a giriftiend, he j u.nFd on his paretrts, blmiDg them for not allov,/ing him to havc a Dornal social life. His nother explabed thrt in her day she had rnissed her schooling due to the Culhral Revolution, therefore, she insisted dtat her soa should put his full attention to educ2tiod. No phone calls and Do contactr with gids were allowed. The lwo generationss€emed 10b€ caught up in opposite endsof a fastrhanging nation in iraDsition. The parenrstalked about6€ir sauggle 0obuild up rhe cnuntry ftom the Srasroots

aekward io coDtinuewith suchpractice. However, now that rhe son was itt. he eas back hoine agair and took up .he sam€posirion with his parenrs in b€d- I remembercdrb€ soD'sagitated gesture wben I tooked in fron behind tbe oDe-way miror. Ir s€€medrhar he was desperately crearing physical spacefo. hins€rby pushiDgout ar his resEictedboundaries.However wben I encouragedhim to Degoriarewirh his parenrrfor new boundaries, his aaicuration disappeded, aDd be b€cane sp€echtessin respoDding ro his nother whds€ rc-nonsense approach le€n€d ro silence both ber husband

It was a sad case wtb a classic Freldian lndenore ser againsta Conmudst backdrop. The son was motivared to cbange, and be slowed thar he could be norrnai with rhe tberapist during rbe session.The nother also waded her son to be indeFndenr and not sickty, as be had b€aome. The fa$er, who had wirnessedin despan th€ sauggte berweenhis ,rif€ and soo, c€rtainly wancd the siruarion to be different. Bu! all ttuee were tocked rn a small room borh physica y and nentally, unable to rnake any new

level in the labor force to wbich they bolh b€longed, whne the boy talked about his wish to live a more leiswely life in modem ChiDa The motler admiited that she wrs the lough one as compared to her busban4 and she had Do understanding of rbe modem youth. I suggesredthen t],at Frhaps lbis was a good time for her to ll:m fiom hs son of a new wdl4 which w3 unfaniliar to her, but the son sned

I was calefit nor ro touch on rhe parents,relarionshipbut simply defircd the youth's problen as ditrcrnry iD gmwing up, and got rhe parenr.!io work together in h€lping hnD to team lo Degoriarea new beginning for himse]f.

to find it difEcult to respoDdto his

mother The son was kDown to have physically auacked his mother who lat€r confess€dthat after each atock he would kft€l dosn otr tbe floor and beg fo. forgiveoess. It seemedth, the boy neededto become sick iD ordtr

I discovered that the family of three lived iD a very tight spacewhere therc was only spacefor one bed This ydmg man gew up sleeping rext to

This ca!€ also insp;€d a gT€ardeal of rhoughi-provoking discussion amo.g $e audiercc. Som€ suggestedthal rhis frmily representeda t$e ir1 the Commurist r€8ime where gender diff€r€nce rs nor always easrly drstinguishableas mer and women dress up sirnitarly and p€rforn rhe sane dutie.s.Some women becone ..g€nerals', Dor only aawo* but at home as well,leaving rhe wonen isolared while th€ husbandsanatsons ofren fait ro live up lo her demandsas in rhis case.

his mother who slept in the middle be$e€n the husbnd and son. They had sent the adoiescentsoo to live with his grdndparentswhen dtey found it too

The exEemely timired tiving space thar has forced many families !o

Live Deho8tta.ion

limit .heir activilies ir bed was seenas an important issue that had shaped many patlems of jnte.p€rsonal dilemma. One worker reponed a case io which the mother war so used to falting asleep wirh her iDIant son while breast,fcedingthat lhe son could not fall arleep withour sucking the morher's b.east eycn when he reached puberry. It seemed that tbe restricted envimrmeDt war crcating nany adjusinetrt problems, which had no. been put to question previously. But how far ole s psychologicar space\vas ned to physical space and whether more physical space coutd faciliiate better psychological space ,rere rwo imponant issues thaa require much more clinical exploradon. Dr. I-oDg-Ji Sun s (1996) cl^ssic The Breatt-Suckiry Narrn may also provide interesting cultunl peEpectives on rhe narion's psyche, whicb is still clinging oo ro i|J botdethe Third Cas€ The third casc involved a rerircd couple, botb of whon were devo.ed Communist Party officials. Wllen I asked dEn ro defiDethen prcblem. tbe uife. $bo had beeDdis"nosed as scbizopbrenic.rold me tbar she had contractena "political ilness." In one keath, sbe explainedhos- she starred life with a vision, a dream and a conrnitrnenf which the! rumed our lo be an illusion, 3nd she had ended up in delusion. ln the sameillusu'ative trrlmer thjs lady rold me her story, which ro tbrough lhirty yeds of political srruggle jn China. Her husband. fron IDdonesia.like rnany tndo,Chineseyouth ofiis

rime rerumeatto the motherland to "s€rve the counrrt-" Joined by a mutual dEm ofbuildiDg a Dewcouney, theseComnunist comradesdeyoted their domgtic and cm€er tives edtely to the CornmuDistPafy. Now thar they werc borh Etired lhe husband was more able to adjust to a quiet domestic life gardening and fishing, but his wife had difficdty letting go and had beome agitated dd

Uhd$ the Beijins St ,

I askedbo& of rhem,..Do you tike what rs nappeningnow in China?,, They both responde4..Ir basneverb€€D bener..I said,.Then, shoutdnl you beproudofyour coreibution ro thecounEy?,,TheIadysaid,..yes,bui now I havenothingelsero do. They won,r evenajiow me ro readthe newspaper. They$y I becomerooanxious.Ano Iney don,t wanrmero lalk

I roldber$ar shehada mosrfa:cinaring sror)andshe,houtdwriren . oo\4n.r lotd her rharI wasrlso a sroryre er andwrrbherperrrissionI rrould like ro *rite abourher.Shetooked sur?nseda,adaskedhow I woutd do that. I saidI would *rite, ..I metrhis couple ir Beijingwho were ,old comract€s,' ard in rhecours€of ole how, tbeyrook mettrough thiny yean of C'hina\ conremporary history_ an experieDce rharr hadmissediDny osnlife. For duing rlose yean whiie rhey wereIghtiDg with thentivesto rcbuildour couDtry, I waswaDdenng in a setf_imposed exilein forejgn l a n ( j !.- ."

I did nor compter€ my story as I began to choke up. She tooked ar me . with 8re?r anaz€menl As our rwo para|€l lives crossedar rh,sjuncture tike rwo sepante tines meeting. her story merge.l irto that of my owr. WreD I retumed ro the cl.ls.oom, many ot ne panrcipanrs were in tearsai they fouDd rhe sessiontouchjng, bllt some of rhem were puzzted, as a storyof $e Cutturat Revolurio. had long lost irs auorencelD China. One askedifmy rea$ w€re pmt of a ..rectmique,, becaus€r seemedlike a powertul rnaneuverto ll€r. The best comptirnent I bad ever rcceivedin reachingabroad came Fom someonewho totd me ,.you have rhe advsnlageof coming in as a strmger becauseyou can tlring new meanirS ro an old srory,, This expe.ience was atso inreres.irjg ro me in tnat I reatized I was nor

Ijre Denonnrction UnnerAe Beijias St} enteringinto the famiy through tbe interperconalarcm $ar I 1l3s accuslomed !o, ratber ft wa-sthe lalger political theme which servedas a common *read ro weave not oDly lhe couple's €latioDship but also my connection to them. The Fourth Case The fourth clse involvei a rcya

old young man who was describ€d

as a '\ele.!ed mute." He was only willing to respond to ny questions by nodding and shaking hn head to indicate his ag@rcnt or disagementFo. exanpte, wher I asked him if )e was inteEsten in girb, he shook his head. When I asked if girls were interested in him, he nodded. Simildly, when I asked if his reaon for not talkjng had anything to do with school probtems, he shook his he3d.Wler I asked if it had anything to do with his family. he nodded.This was an interesting contrastto his parents'insistence that thet son's problem had Dothing to do with dE family. This was about aJ the information rhar I could get our of the interyiew. Although $e parelts admined that they had had some ndital problems, both claimed that dEse had beenresolvedand saw lo point in going rhrough rhem again. The young rrE, o! the other han4 s€em€dto imply rhar ud6s his parentswer€ will;ls to addEsstheir problems openly,he would conrinue

get up and lool at his parentslrom a few feer away. rhen move back a few feet fidher and look ar rhern again. He did as I suggesredunt he rcached the end ofrh€ room.I arked ifhe woutd tike to took at them fron even firther away, .nd suggesredrhat he coutd standon top of a chair The young iDan got up on a chair and since he was raiher tall, he coutd see rhe small op€nmg above rhe door. I said thal as we grow older. our eyes stan looking out of fte window inro rhe outside wortd, and our p smaller The young rnan fotlowed ny inst uctjons quieily and |e began to cry. He crien for a long time as he was slandi,g on top of rhe chair. lookng out into the opening, whjch, unfonunateiy only openedup irro a hallway. This was not a nrneuver that I had usedpEviously, although rhe use of spacewas nor a DewconceF jn Structurat Family TheEpy. AI experjenced thenpisrs haveaccumulaftd a gr€at deat of rechnicalmdeuvers

in rheback of their Dinds. The quesrionis, what triggers rhe .he.apist to use wha! maneuver and ar what given point in time. For Ine, ir was nor a conscious decision, bur nther, a murually shaping and reshaping process illat act like a grant haDdthat molds me and aU the invotved panies ilto ,ew shapes.At in€ eD4 an experientiat dEnu had taken fom, which surpnsed not onty tne audreDce aDdfie famijy. bur aho me. he drempi\l

to retuse talking. Tbere was a stong pull between fte paEnts dd son; the tension was nounting up in sileDce.I decided rojoin then in then s [email protected] noticed $at

After the lasftwo cases,I rhought that I had eMausrco my energy md emoUoul capacities.But $e folowing two casesconrinued ro push me into different directioDs.

the son kept lookinS at his mother who was a.v€ry artnctive lady- w}len t askedif his lack of interest in gnb wd due to lhe fact dla. few women could

Th€ Fifrh Cas€

natch his mother's gace and b€aury,he respondedwith a smile-

The fifth caseiDvotveda l5-year_oldboy whohadbeen hospiralized for overa yearfor psychoricepisodes.Again. his moiher was hospitalized

The lack of words soon shapedmy iftedention snd I bege to tuin to the use of space.I asked the youg ma! to come clos€r and k!@l berwen his pa.ents. I said lhat when we re young, our parenrs look very big dd imponant, but as we groq they b@ome smaller. I askedthe young man lo

with hin. The farher was a successfulbusiDessnaD who was very much agaDst putring rhe boy in !h€ hospitat. He was parricutarjy againsrputting the sor on psychotropicdrugs.Indeed,the boy seemed heavity drugged ano rI was rather difficult for him to function withour dozing off. H€

Lbe Denoneranon Unde/theBeijiae Stq spok€ of a voice iDside his head, which kept him away from school. However, as I coDtinued to talk to him in a normal way, his affecr imploved and he gave me a good description of his hospit.l ljfe. This fanity of rhre€ Fesented iiself as having exFemely low energy; rhercfo'e

in kinderyateD and b€crme wors€ each year. His mother went lo rhe same scbool when she was yoEng and was atso described as having behavioral pmblerns back then.

it was not easy to cany out a convcrsation with rhem. The boy said rhar he did nor like lbe hospiral.and his Dorher addedrharbe had beftiended

The school pnncipal came with the famity for this consultation. She said ahatthe boy was so out of conFol, thar if be had had to viait any tonger

a girl of the same age there, and he *as very upser when this girt lefr, The boy semed to brightetr up a lisle when rhe topic ofgi.ls was rouched

for the inieruiew,he would have succeededin rearingdown rhe waiiing roorl! if not dre entirc buitding.

upon. The turnjng point of this case came when the farher and rhe son beganto have a "mao to man" ralk- The boy was keen ro find oul how his father met his motbe., derails about rheir romaDce,and quesdons r€galdiDg why his farher'r 6rst mariage failed. tt se€medlhar the boy was very concernedabourhis parents reladonship. I did not offer the family any solution to r]le boy's probteln, bur rhe p@nt! were obviously happy to experience the son as a nom'l youth and not a psychotic patient. Agam, the audiencewas quite curious about how rbe whole rhing evolved. Tbey claimed that they would rever have believ€d ir possible for a father and son to have such a good ralk, panicularly iD relation to g s,

TheE was nemendous pressure on me to pedorn. I tded ro lesisr rhe push bu. sooDrealizedtha. if I did nor rcryond. I woutd also be tom apan by the groDp. When I finElly gofto see the boy he selned like a normal rGyear_old. I rold him dnr I had been i.formed t\at be had a great skiil in ciimbing up walls and succeed€din escaping any co!fineinent imposed on him. I asked hitrr if he could get oui of the interaiewine room if we were iocked in. He looken around !€riously and replied that it was lery €asy, atl he had to do was to st? on the doork ob and reach for rhe window abov€ the door Jusr two sleps and he would be fie€.

since this was not in their penonal experiencenor itr their undelsrandingof the Chirese culture. The Euth is, it was not my om cuttural and personal

It was quite easy for me to relare to rhis boy. He was cooperalive and well-spok€r. He rold ne inar he had never don€ anyrhingwelt, and was

experience either, but iD view of lhe lek of ropics that semed ro inteBr this family ofthree,Ijurt took a riskand uieddleboy's i erestiD a gnl and

rejected by everyoneat schoot.His only hope was ro b€comea masterof the nrrtial ans, so rhar he coutd avenge allthe wrongs that were done to hjm.

pushed for the father-son interaction. This showed u that sometimes it is possible ad €ven usetul to br€ak some norms and do urhinkable rhings_ After all. therapy is a processof inEoducing Dovelry. Tbe Sixth Case This was a big contrast ro rhe pr€vious cas€.At 10 yens o14 the Ip in thrs casewas described.s a litde norsrer whde behavionl problems *aned

His parEDrsb.longed to tbe poor workilg class.W}len the situarion was re3lly bad, rhe school had i.structed the farher to attend ctasseswirlr his son, so that he could control the boy when no one etsecould. Sucb an arraDaement,of course, isolared the boy firnher fron his classnates. And $e father was so amoyen for having ro anend schoot with rhe son rhat he just beat hin eve, more.

Uve Dnonstatio^ Undertte Beiine Sb The boy had leamed to b€come v€rj rough and he said that physical punisbrneDtw3s nothitrg to him. As he lzlked abouathe unfair treatment rhat was imposedon hirD by tbe school syst€ar he becarDevery mgry and stafed to cry. Tbe protest of a young cbnd in terjs pmved difficult for the atults to deal with- His parents staJtedto scold him ald eveD the school principal who was sympathetic to the boy could not belp tul kept telling him that she had a job 1odoIt b€came clear that the boy and his nother were closely connected. Both were regarded as misfits in the society. Tte boy was said to have walked miles to look for his mother at wo* wh€trever he could get a\tay. It las also clear that the boy was a lot brighter than his p@nts, who l'ere also rejected by the larger systen and labeled as "poor

Disflrssior I have reponed thes€casesin the exaci sequeDcein which I saw them. I have done lbis becausewhen se€nalone, each presenB iis oM particular n mlive pattem, but whe, experienced together rhey form a kaleidoscope of colols thrt guided Ine on an extensiv€cultural tour The impact of marathon live family inteniews is indeed labor,intensive and emotionatly demanding for both fte tminer and the trainees. Some of tbe more experienced participa s, who were graduatesofthe Sino Gend

FaiDing projec! sh?red

their obs€rvarions in lheA €-nail conespondence and laler sent me copies for rcferenc€. Th€ folowing is a brief suriJnary of the Eaineei renarks. It was miften in the form?r of an Intemel chat room with one trainee starting a remark and otber trainces adding in their comnents or interjections in

parents." It was iDterestingto see that while the pa.e s were lacking verbal expressionand comp.eheDsibility,the son was ou.spoketrand

Locked in a dght and supprers€d systen, the boy reminded us of rhe

'TheD I first attended the lecture by Dr. Lee, I fouod her ideas very

Ebetlious l€gend of the Monkey KiDg. Tuming heavenupside dom seem€d

differenl from what we have lea.n€d fron our Germen teachers.In

to be the only way io escapethe imposition of fte herveDly Gods. And tie

comparison with my oM theoEtical ftmewor*

belief that one person with uDbeatableporers can defeat the ertire

of contradictiois in her demonstrations and I rejected her teaching at the

bureaucratic system appsred to be embedded iD lhe narional psych€ as

beghning. Hopever, afrer tbe taining, I found mys€f begirrriDg to use her

indicated in th€ popularity ofrhis favorite classic- Looking at rhe boy's

rDethodsunconsciously. When I went back to check my notes trlGn during

problem io the light of the Mookey King leseDd seemed to give a new

thc training, I rcalized rbat without thinling car€fuly, I had adoptei 90% of

trteaning to his behavior.

her t€aching into Dy work." (lntedection frorn arorner p€non: What would you have lemed if you had be€n IIIINKING

dd pra€tice, I fouod a lot

CAREFULLY?)

The audience, Iike ne, was very nuch dnwn to the boy and his pain. The principal who witnessed this intervie* was also toucbed by rhe boy's

"hdeed when th€ tberapist asked whal we had leamed from her

story She moved ftom a position ofdefending tbe position ofthe school at

frst inteniee, my respoDseat that time was that I did not learr anyrhing.

the begimiDS, to tle conclusion thar 'tne boy's bebavior is partly shap€dby

I rhougrhtwhat she taught us could be simply summarizedin rwo padsl

the s.hool systen" She proini!€d to act as a bridge betv€en the boy and lhe

The tusl pan was the ideas we had aheady learned -

correcr ideas.

The other part were ideas that were Dot compatible wilh what we had

Uye DznDNtation

leamed -

wrorg ideas." (Interjection: I felt rhe same when I first

atteDdedher demonstration iI Hong Kong)- 'Luckily, after half a day, I

U.der the Bei iaS Stq

contert in which peoptein ir had ro gradualtyrespondto her seeningty Don-pushing mann€r."

was able to re adjtisr ny focus. This experi€ncereminded lt'e of the Zen story that a tull cup holds no new water. I have to iake along more empty cups for my leaming in th€ tuture-" The Inponan e ofJoining "ff the therapist was lisrening to the exprience of an old couple, she was in tems. She laler explarned that there was Dothingto be woried about if you got emotiolally irvolved. Her position was puzzling to me because we had leaned to be always 'reutral' ftom our Gemen t€ach6. And yet she b€lieved that therapists should be flexible and be able to be rcural sonetimes, and other times to tate a positioo depending on the sioradon." (lnterjetion: Tlris is esiier said the done-) (IDterjectioD: Is this agaiDst Neutrality, or what?)

Cotttt@icatinI with Chi 1drc4 ''ln the six cases.four of the Ips wereboysag€dbetween t0 a.d 15. Someof then wercaDdousandnervous,sone werequierandsomewere active.h ber demonsbalion,the rherapist€mployedditrerenrapFoaches accordingto eachchitd's personatity.andsuccessfrrllymaderbenervous cbild .elax, lhe silent onerespond,andthe activeonesettledown.I was inpressedby how shenaragedro find relaredtoptcsroengagerhe cHldren iD iDteresringconversations. I rhoughtsomeropicscould noi be discussed betwe€nfarbemrd son,for insrance,.whendid rhe farherbegin ro show iDrerestin gids?'But whensheprornoredrhistopic to rhefarherandson. ir did leadto b€ttercommuDicarion b€rweerrhem.I wasamazedat how she could bEak tbe raboos." Dealingwith ConJIi.r

"It works in the sameway ash)?nosis- I us€dto believeft was r€dunddt to repeat the sdne m€ssagein the thenpeutic session.In two of lhe cas€s, the therapisl rep€atedhels€lf agah and again. In the caseof lhe l4-y€m-old boy who retused to talk she said rep€atedly, It must be diffolt

for you to

be so concemedabout your parenas'relarionship.'And the boy beganto cry. iele-sing his pain and sutreflng- It seemedthat her repetitivenesshad a djEct and powertul etrect on the boy'r iDq ser." (Interjection: How ca, you lell that the boy's weepiog in Ihe s€ssionwas createdby hs Ep€ated use of the sme senteoce?)'In the caseof the I Gyear-old boy *no *?s our of conFol

"Oneoflhe skils us€din StructuratFamityTberapyis EDactrnenr. The therapistmadeuseof this sknt ftequenlly. Shecontinuouslyencouraged family membersro tatk ro eachorherdirecrty.,,(Interjecrion:I have been usingthissli oncouptesrhatcarnorcommuni€tewith eacbotber.Alrhough n wasdifficulr to ga shrted,slrprisirgty, ir oflen workedout 6ne.The use ofenactrnentalsoprovidedan opportunityfor the coupresro practrceed rcheanewharshoBldbedoneat home.)..Mymainconcemrsllow to contr.ol thesitoationifrhe couptesrais roquarel duringanenacdDenr?,, (lnteiedion: I badthe saDeconcemtoo.)

and vowed to fight the wodd ofitrjustice, the dEEpis. repqted hers€f agaia 'I und€rsiandthat it mus. be very peiffn and upAelting6 people .round are not happy with you ard always rcjecting you.'Gndualy,

her words calnEd

the naughlv boy dd he staned to por his feelings out fiom the bodom of his hean. She later €iplained tlat Epeating the same messageio differc mannersis a way of cnating ineDsiry Inde!4 it @ted m atrnosphereand

'"Theiierapisr did morerhanjusr ralk during ner sessrons.Sheused differentkindsofSestures, espeialy vidl chndren.Whe, shemerrie clierrs sheshookhsndswitb eachof rhem,and askedrnemro wnte down the; nameson a pieceof paper Sheoftenaskedthechild.ento standup so rhar

rjye Detu

she could seehow tal they wqq She asked the child to excbange his s€at with his Ddotherso that his parentscould talk !o ea.h other face-to fa@. Th€ silent te€nagerwas asked to sland on the chair to s€e ifhis pamts looked snaller fion this new persFctive- She also movei hersef away ftom th€ family so that they could talt freely. But she never pows tea for family nenbers, and ehen they cry st€ Devergives tlten tissue! (she only moved

'Tbe thenpist did nothing hn vait who quiet childen Efirs€d lo answer her questions.W}leD the pfie s tried lo answer for the childre[ sbe would suggest tlat the chitdEtr be given more time to give a respoose on then ow!. Wirh rhe case of the selecied mute it took more than 10 mi.utes. Everybody tept quiet and wait€d for tbe young rnan to respond.Th@ was tremeDdouspressue causedby waitiDg dtrough the silac! for s'rch a long tine. Afler dnr she told him her owD story She said, 'Wbfl I was 13, I also decided not to talk. Do you know why?' The boy shook his head. 'I think rhe world was too noisy. Do you know how long I kept q'iiet?'He shook his head again. 'Two years! People tried to help me. Guessif it worked.'The boy aDswered No.' 'You lnow the way adults r.y lo help does not always work.' The boy still did nor say much. Bua he listened attentively and used his tears to respond. I described ihis ability to join $e boy in his sileD@as 'persistency.'Sometimes,what we lack is Dot skills but pelsislency." (Intedection: But isn't penistercy a sk

as wel?)

'The thenpist defined atl the childEn's problerDsas 'having diffic'rlty in growing-up.'In our previous training we have been laught to get to the

narion Utu*t the Beijins St{r

Maki"g Uv olYour lw,aace 'The therapisrofteDrold rhefamity that .I am not familiar with you, situation,canyou pleasete me moreaboutit?, I recalledDr. MacDonald (G€rnanteacher)atsoused.hesam€racdcwbenhe gavetectures. He used to askthe ciienrs ro rep€aror to speal up becausehis hea.ing was poor Insteadofusing aurborityro give insrucrion,rh€therapistwasusing hisher pbysjcaiweatnelsor cukunl djtrerences in pushing ct,en6,nroacrion... Mt Gaits "I sswtharl€e's th€npy did not hav€anystandardsr.ocnfe.It wasnor stnictural,Dorsystemaric,nor srraregic.Shewasv€ry individuatized in the sens€thatsheis guidedby herintenction with thefamilies.I wasreninded of a storyof a samuraiwho vowedto d€feata high mont. For rwentyyears he hadstudiedall rhe manial an approacbes andacqutueda lhe fighting tecturiques,but the mont only snnledwhenhe heardaboorit. In the Dexr decade,when the leamedrharrhe samuai was naking beancurd 'lont daily,hebegEnto worry.For hebew rhartbesamuraihadleamed th€nost powerftl shll, whichcarn€fiom tbepnctice oftife. Likewise,the th€mpisr.s skills in working ,,rith famites shoutdatsoreflecrthe tif€ sirua.ion,whicb changesconstanrly_" "This lherapisrwas nor keenon changingthe tamilyt i,reracrive pattemsiInsEad,shepr€ferredto rev€allbe co.flict anatrhe transactionrl patternsof the family. Shedid not useparador,or anythng tharwas tleoEtical or corclusive.Shewasnot ke€nro set rhefamily anything.When familiespress€dfor an s'swer, sh€atwaysa.sweEd ,.ith uncenainty. By conparison,I am sril findiDgir h.rd roEsist giving famitiesa prescription

core of the problens and ask the families to control the problems. Her approrch was to chaDgedifficult psychological problems to developmeEtal ones, which seern€dto make it much easier for the parents to hmdlc- h is much better than iellitrg parentsthar their clildrEn aE mntal patients."

'"Io coDclud€,I am mostimpressedwith rbrcerhingsin the th€rapist,s demonstRtion:( I ) The useof enacrneDr. (2)Theuseof space.Thescenario

Li,e Denonstotion Unn* th. Beiins stq of rhe boy standing on fie chair and weeping as he looked outsiib rh€ room was ind€€d very touching. (3) Her friendliness toward the fanily mdnbels. Duing the inlereiews she shook heds wfth rhe fdily rembers to show her support and etrco'rragementfor then actions, Thaa was probably $e easiestthing for me to take away from the demonstration." Conclusion One catr dilcuss this teachingexperiencedrough many different lenses,

In my siruarion, s;!ce I am Factically a sranger in Beijing, it is equalty imponant for me lo a\plo!€ how lny therapeuticapproach can be applied 10 Iocal faDities. Howevea any demonstiarionof a clinical aDDroachis idiosyncraric m Mrure. as rr is atwa) s reflecnve oi tle p.rronl ,O f. of,f,. dcmoDstmtor Fm a moment, rhe tr-aiDeesare pur in an audi€nce posirion, laking a back s€at while iD€vitabty evaluating tle work of tne lrainer. One can always argDerhat it is like going to a show or a !€rfonndce. To make the best use of live demonsrration,a more sysremarictraining program has

such as the cuhrlal penpective, .he one
shapitrg atrd resbaping interpersoMl has an impact that is seldom addressedin fterdpy (t €e, 2002). Focess wlen the theEpeutic stageis obsqven by a live audience, the fear of boring myself and the audierce from behind rhe one-way mirror seens to necessitate a sense of etrtertainment as depicted by Cloe Madanes. In Madanes's view, ertertainmeni relies heavily on metapborical communication and ofteo plays witb confusion and misunde.stading, wherea! education irvolves infomEtion md the tmnsmissioDof ski s with no place for contusioo and misederst nding of symbolic comunication. The exception is, of cours€,in rhe htuing of lhenpy. When the lerming is to solve problems of living, teaching must take place at differenl levels (Madanes,1988). For thd natter, I am quile pleasedwith the audierce's fedbek,

which

However, rhe aim in SrrucruralFamily Therapy trainirg is ro hetp thenprsts io develop an op€n system, one rhar can aataprto a wide range of familial and sociat contem. I rhink thjs nainjng €xpedence has hetped to €xpand the panicipants' p€rception offamily relarions as rhey were able to witness first-hand th€ drdia of si{ fanilies. I was very impress€d willl rhe; abitj.y ro obsfee deraits,then inquisitiveness.and their inrercstit] techniques. Ir is true rhal I used€nacrmenrconrinuouslyi, aU the inrerviews. The advanrageof such is for rhe audiencelo wirness the family drama by lhemselveswitb no ne.d for explanarion.Dunng the va.rious famity sircoms or d.amas, I could rhen chatlenge the wife's seemiDgtytoyal commimenr lo the husbaDdas iD dle first case, tum a schizopoeDrc young man mro a norlnal yourh, join wjti the Conmunisr warrior, help a selected muce to exp€ss hiDselfin siteDc€,iftoduce the topic of sex to a farier and son. and rame a moi'srer in rhe finat session.Wlile alt this was goinS oq I was also in dialogue witn rhe iDlisibte audience fiom betund the one,way nirroi *hoa atrh.ipated responseshad inevilably influeDced my Fdormance in

appeared to reflect a compler and intense @ge of erDotiodal reactions. Live family intwiew fo. the purpos€of traintug is a Fadiion in the field of family 6erapy. It is d€€mednecessaryfor nes therapisls to observe how the exp€rienced ones work. In tl|e raining of Asian therdpists where the clinical culture is stilt uoderdeveloF4 live observabor ofdE clinical process helps to bridge the gap betw@n theoreticzl l@ing

and clitricd application.

Ofthe six cases,fow w€re from mentat insriturions and two were from .he scboot system_The involv€menr offaniti€s was dicrated by poticies in both sjstems. Two of the casesinvolved boQitalizarion of fanily rnenbers, the wife in rie fiIsr case, and the morher in the fou.th ore. ln the school

Dve DercNtution Undzrth. Beijine Skr system, the parents were asked to atterd school when their child was i[behaved, as ilt the case of the lGyear-old misfit. Clearly, families were rnaderesponsible for other me.nbers, paniculady io ille ca$ of minors lt seillts to me that thesefamily-oriented policies. which cm be bwdeniDg to families, can also pave solid gound for rh€ developrnenrof family lh@py. On the one hand, dis taching experierce put me constantly in touch with my theoreticalfianework while at tbe sametime, lherc was m urBeDtDe€d fo: me to stray away from my own therapeutic orientatiotr. At the end, I more tully why Sauctural Family Therapy is more a way of thinting than a set of te.hnical steps (Minuchin, l-ee, & Simon,

came to undenta 1996).

Sa.lMinuchin is the founder of Structoral Family Tbempy. He is also my leacherwho n€ver stopcftom pushing ne ro explorEnew horizons-Wlen I ralked ro him abouthow I applied dte Structur:dlcorcepls to Asie famili€s, h€ ofteD respondedwith: '"That is boring,I know how to do tha! tell me somedringnew!" In my quest for onginaliry ody when I told him about ib€ ColmDist couple in the secondcasedid be rcspod: 'Thar is neq I could Dot do thai." I took it.i

his way of saying that a thenpist has to lransfolm

hisher own uniqre experienceinto a theraFutic encoDter, something that is b€yondiechoiquefton any given $enFutic

fi'lmwork. And my Beijing

encounter has certainly expand€d my capacity for interconnectednessand emotionality in the unfamiltar led of my home count-a Il seems$at the inpad of nararhon live family intwiews hasinaensfi€d the leaming expqience for both the traiEs

dd tlE Faine. If tbe int€rest of

the audience determines the successof the shoq lhere is no question that rie sir families put on quite m inpressive show.

Glick l. D. (1982).A fuily Intendriotut rotut

therapi$ in rbe People\ Republicof ChiDa-

of FMi,

Thcmpt, 4(3). 1'77-183.

HaDpson,R. B., & Beavds,W R. (1989).Fd;ly rherapyin the peopte,s Repubficofchina: An update.Contenpo/ary FadilyTheq,J, (4J,235_ 245. l4e, W Y (2!02) Ore Therapis! fd

cultEs: Wo.kinSwith frndlies ir creater Iherdpt, 21(3), 258-27s. Ie, Y 1, Du, Y F., & Dou. Z. J. (1998). Fmily systemsL,ucturedd famity tbdapy GnCaiDe*).lor@l of ChaasdeMedicat Coltese, rn:1), t9_81. MadlDes,C. ( 1988).Fanily lherapyFainir$ It s e.renaimenL In H_A. Uddte. C\;rL .Iounal oJFMilt

D. C. BreuDlin, & R. C. Schwstrz (Eds.), Hdtdbook oJfonitr thetup) tainitq aad srpedi'ion (W. 379-385). New yorl: Gui]fdd p.ess. Minucbi!, S.,lre, W. Y, & Sinon, c. M. (1996). Ma$ eriag fatuit, theropy: JoumeysoJsmnh ad tesJom4rbL New yorL JohnWit.y & Sons. N, J. Z, Jia Y P..Liu. X. J., & Liu, L_(2000).A conpaison s!u.!yof srrucrural family rherapywith schizoptuenjc panenrs.Heabh psycholag, Joumal, 80). t05 106 suD.L.J. (l9

). Itu ,pd$ &.tin8 tur'o, (in Chines€).Taip€i: Ju Liu Tushu. Y&s, K., Tans,Y. xiu, s., & Zno, x. 099). A studyofseneral techdqu€sof sy$enic family rh6py (in Chinese).Acadehic Joumt oJK&nins Medicat Co ese,20(2),8-13. Yane,K., Zno, X., Tang,Y, & xiu, s. 0 999).A siudyof applyinssystenic fmily .heEpy io $e psychologicalproblen peopteunder I 8 yea6 old (in C\irese, Yd NM M.dicine. 2013),162-164. Ymg, M. (1995).Questioningrechniqu€sof siructuratfamily lberapist(in ()';ne*\. Chia5. Me^tal Hedtth Maea.ine, qq, ][3-185. Zhao, X. D., & Xuan, X. (t999). Operarionalrechniquesof..resource idot'rficatioD" in family tlehpy (D L\nn se)..tatmat oJChineseClinicdt Psrchotosr, 7(2\, lr9-121 .

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