Excuses 2

17 January 2008 Dear _______________________, Presumably

because

deliberate

of

neglect

my

to

continued

attend

disregard

to

or

consequential

an

entirely

obligations

incidental to my becoming a part of a community of servants that I could not perform religiously, I am causing this letter to be made. I have to admit though that I have been running for almost a lifetime once confronted with a situation where justice to ones affiliation and obligation is at stake. I could have averted these circumstances if not because of my intent to widen my horizon

and

involve

my

life

to

other

persons

of

similar

predicament. My

limited

understanding

of

instances

and

circumstances,

my

impulsive concept of action and reaction and my myopic view of cause and effect all form part of this sudden decision in an attempt to address all those concerns relative to my attendance to services and such other sworn duty. My life has

been

characterized

by

solitary

confinement

to a

willful degree. The spirituality in me could not manifest its true character. I must have caused you too much trouble, the community as well. If only I could find ways of lessening such… The bottom-line of all these tedious, verbose and circumlocutory statements

is

that

I

could

no

longer

be

able

to

meet

the

responsibilities of being a part of the community of servants. There

is

this

feeling

of

unworthiness

brought

about

by

a

continuing

struggle.

It

all

boils

down

to

the

question

of

priority. At any given time and even space, one can never be really both definite and ambivalent about his decisions, about persons or situations. Certainly,

there

explanation

for

could all

of

be

no

these

enough, faulty,

valid

or

irreverent

reasonable and

selfish

human decisions. Turning away from a cause that proved to be as vital

as

any

calculated

other

solely

experience for

the

is

something

purpose

of

that

evasion

I or

have

not

complete

avoidance. If time will permit, I am trying to re-position, re-assess and retrieve

the

lost

pieces

of

what

has

become

of

me

after

a

lifetime of chase. By then, all these conditions must have taken its rightful place in my system and history. May we still be continually blest with good health, a healthy mind and a mindful heart. Thank you very much and God bless.

Regretfully,