Accountability

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H.A.B.I.T.S. Plumbline Devotional Accountability

"Accountability breeds response-ability." Stephen R. Covey

"Accountability breeds response-ability." Stephen R. Covey

Jan. 15 — Jan. 21, 2009

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Accountability A Biblical Example: The Letters of Paul

Page 15 1 Thessalonians 5:11 (NRSV) Therefore encourage one another and build up each other, as indeed you are doing.

Proverbs 17:17 (NCV) A friend loves you all the time, and a brother helps in time of trouble. Proverbs 29:11 NIV A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.

Define Accountability (see Dictionary at the back):

Proverbs 22: 24. Do not associate with a man given to anger ; Or go with a hot-tempered man, 25. Or you will learn his ways And find a snare for yourself.

Now explain it in your own words:

Acts 7:51 "You men who are stiff-necked and uncircumcised in heart and ears are always resisting the Holy Spirit ; you are doing just as your fathers did. 52. "Which one of the prophets did your fathers not persecute ? They killed those who had previously announced the coming of the Righteous One, whose betrayers and murderers you have now become ; 53. you who received the law as ordained by angels, and yet did not keep it."

The idea of accountability is not new. It was God’s idea to begin with (the best ones always are). Read Galatians 6:1-10 (See page 14)

According to this passage what should we do?:

Proverbs 25:11. A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver. 12. Like an earring of gold or an ornament of fine gold is a wise man's rebuke to a listening ear.

Dictionary Accountability:answerable or accountable, as for something within one's power, control, or management. Able to be trusted or depended upon; reliable. Based on or characterized by good judgment or sound thinking Capisce (pronounced cah-PEESH) is an Italian word that is used in American slang to say "got it" or "understand."

January January 1,15, 2009 2009

Dictionary

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Scripture References

What should we not do?:

James 5:16. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other Romans 1:11 I long to see you so that I may impart to you some spiritual gift to make you strong--12. that is, that you and I may be mutually encouraged by each other's faith. Galatians 6:1. Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. 2. Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. 3. If anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself. 4. Each one should test his own actions. Then he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody else, 5. for each one should carry his own load. 6. Anyone who receives instruction in the word must share all good things with his instructor. 7. Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. 8. The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. 9. Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. 10. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.

Genesis 4:2 Later she gave birth to his brother Abel. Now Abel kept flocks, and Cain worked the soil. 3. In the course of time Cain brought some of the fruits of the soil as an offering to the Lord. 4. But Abel brought fat portions from some of the firstborn of his flock. The LORD looked with favor on Abel and his offering, 5. but on Cain and his offering he did not look with favor. So Cain was very angry, and his face was downcast. 6. Then the LORD said to Cain, "Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? 7. If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it." 8. Now Cain said to his brother Abel, "Let's go out to the field." And while they were in the field, Cain attacked his brother Abel and killed him.

Scripture References

God created us to keep track of each other. How do you think God would answer Cain’s famous question (Read Genesis 4:2-8)?

"Therefore we pledge to bind ourselves to one another, to embrace our lowliest, to keep company with our loneliest, to educate our illiterate, to feed our starving, to clothe our ragged, to do all good things, knowing that we are more than keepers of our brothers and sisters. We are our brothers and sisters." -Maya Angelou

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Accountability You Complete Me Or...Choosing a Partner Today let's look at what the Bible tells us about choosing an accountability partner.

Read: 1 Thessalonians 5:11

For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them. Matthew 18:20.

What is the purpose of an accountability partner?

Let’s start with what an A.P. is not: A Counselor: This isn’t someone who is there to give answers. An accountability partner is there to ask questions. They can steer you to answers in the scripture. *If your partner needs more help than you are qualified to give, please seek out an adult!!*

A Fellowship Partner: Your time together is more than just “hanging out.” Your questions should be about more than the score of the game (Packers are going all the way next year) or politics (What did you think of today’s inauguration of President Obama?)

The Boss of You: An accountability partner should not spend your time together telling you what you should and should not be doing. He/she can offer advice to a question you might have but you should both be mindfull of the fact that Jesus is the ultimate answer to every question.

January 16, 2009

Take this space and do some brainstorming about your ideal Accountability group.

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A Session Now that you’ve chosen a partner, practiced giving and receiving feedback, and picked some areas that you need to be held accountable for...what do you do with it all? Weekly meetings are the best way to maintain and foster accountability. When you get together your meeting might look a little like this: 1. Pray. Invite God to be a part of your meeting. Ask him to help you be sensitive in giving and receiving feedback. Ask for wisdom and guidance. 2. Take turns asking the questions you agreed to ask and giving feedback about the past week. 3. Brainstorm ways to help be more Godly in the week ahead. 4. Pray. This would be a good time to practice that A.C.T. S. thing.

An accountability partner should be: Close to you spiritually. I would not want Billy Graham holding me accountable for my spiritual life. I would feel like an utter failure up against his amazing life. I also wouldn’t want a local third grader asking me if I’ve struggled with my thought life this week—capisce?

He or she also needs to be someone trustworthy and discreet. If you know that “Jane” always tells you everything about her friend “Betsy” then you can be pretty sure that Betsy is hearing all about you. Is that the person you want to share your deepest struggles with? I think not.

What are some attributes you’d like your ideal partner to have?

Brainstorm some names and pray about some potential partners:

That’s it. Doesn’t look that daunting does it? It isn’t. But whenever two or more are gathered in the name of the Lord, he is there among them. You have a very important third guest...the same guest you should be aware of all week long.

If you feel led to a certain person and want to take the next step, don’t bowl them over. Ask them to pray about working with you. Keep your eyes open for accountability partners may present themselves in unusual ways.

It is time to restore the American precept that each individual is accountable for his actions. Ronald Reagan

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Accountability Giving Feedback A popular talk show host is fond of referring to the “Drive-By Media” meaning they give you a quick burst of something on the news but don’t follow up. The same thing happens when we give “Hit and Run” feedback to someone else. For instance: a friend of yours is always late. At first you ignore it. Then you start to get frustrated but don’t confront your friend. Finally you explode and dump all your frustration but your friend is clueless as to why you just exploded. You both walk away upset and nothing gets resolved. Read Romans 1:11-12 Why does Paul want to go and visit the church in Rome?

Right. Accountability is so that we can be mutually encouraged. That means giving and receiving feedback about the struggles we’re having. If you find yourself in a position to give feedback (which you should be on a weekly basis if you have an accountability partner) here are some tips: 1.

Pick a good time—a set up, quiet time. Shouting feedback in the halls between classes isn’t advisable.

2. Start with a positive—listening to things you need to improve on is very hard. Starting with a positive (hey, you’ve been doing really great getting your work done) helps soften the blow.

January 19, 2009

15. Did you struggle with a disappointment this week? How did you handle it? 16. Have you respected and treated your classmates, co-workers and peers graciously by showing them compassion and the love of God in your words and deeds? What can you do to enhance your relationships here? 17. How is your level of character, according to the comparison of Gal. 5:22-23 versus Gal. 5:19-21? 18. How did you practice joy this week? Have you had a thankful attitude toward God? Have you struggled with anger toward God? How so? What can you do about it? 19. Have you taken care of the temple of the Holy Spirit with rest, sleep, exercise, healthy eating, etc? What about addictions, gluttony, or substance abuse? 20. Has your thoughts been kept pure? 21. Are you giving to the Lord's work with your time, talent, and treasures? What about financially? 22. What do you need to do to improve your relationships with God and with others? 23. What do you see as your number one need or struggle for this next week? 24. Have you compromised your integrity in any way? 25. Did you lie about anything I just asked you?

Some verses to study in regard to these questions: Proverbs 25:12; 27:17; Ecclesiastes 4:8-12; Romans 14: 13-23; 2 Corinthians 12:1913:6; Galatians 6: 1-6; Colossians 3:16; Ephesians 4:9-13; 1 Thessalonians 5:14; James 5:15-16; Hebrews 3:13

Obviously you won’t be able to ask all of these questions every time... you’d never have time to mess up and have interesting answers if you did. Pick a couple that you think would be good for a partner to ask you every week.

Accountability isn’t just weekly meetings with a “partner.” It also means having friends who’ll punch your face when you need them to.

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Accountability Top 25 Accountability Questions 1. Did you spend significant time with God through His Word, prayer, quiet time, devotions, and other spiritual disciplines? How much; how constant? Is He your driving force? 2. Have you faithfully served the Lord, His people, and the lost? 3. Did you go and participate in church activities and worship this week? How so? Why not? 4. Did you set spiritual goals this week? What were they? Did you achieve your spiritual goals? 5. How have you struggled with sin? What are the sins that have weighed down your walk with God this week? 6. In what ways has God blessed you this week? How have you shared your blessings? 7. What disappointments did you face? Did they consume your thoughts? What did you do about it? What can you learn? 8. Have you filled the mandates of your call, work and school, practicing excellence, and being the best 100% as you can be for His glory? 9. Have you been alone in a compromising situation? Have you been flirtatious? Did you put yourself in a situation with a member of the opposite sex that could appear to be compromising, even though it may not have been? 10. Have you shared your faith? In what ways? How can you improve? Have you had an opportunity to share with a non-Christian? 11. Have you been trustworthy? Have you lied? Stolen? Cheated? Been Dishonest or Manipulative? Have you elevated yourself over another for your own personal agenda? What about your language and attitude? 12. Have you allowed the media and its distortions in TV, music and movies to unduly influence you? What about peer pressure? 13. Have you been prideful? Have you been guilty of Gossip or Anger? Slandered? Shown Indifference? Been Greedy? Not Controlled your tongue? This hinders people from knowing and trusting Christ the most! 14. Have you demonstrated a servant's heart? How so? What have you done for someone else this week?

January 21, 2009

3. Describe the behavior specifically—”You’re always late” isn’t as helpful as “Last week you were 10 minutes late, the week before 15, and the week before that 12.”

4. Make a suggestion or request—”I would appreciate it if you were on time next week because when you’re late it make me feel like you don’t value my time.”

5. Check for understanding—this is as simple as saying “Do you understand?” or “Do you have any questions for me?”

No doubt talking about how to give feedback has brought to mind a specific situation in your life right now. Take the space below and write out how you can address this situation in your life.

What do these verses have to say about anger? Proverbs 29:11 NIV, Proverbs 22: 24.

Let me be clear - no one is above the law. Not a politician, not a priest, not a criminal, not a police officer. We are all accountable for our actions. Antonio Villaraigosa

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Accountability

3. Show you understand. (Say, “Okay” or “I understand.”)

Accepting and Implementing Feedback As difficult it is to tell someone when they are in need of a course correction, it is even worse to be on the receiving end. No one likes to be told they are making a mistake or, in the case of an accountability relationship, told that they are failing God. Ouch!

4. Thank the person. Yep, you heard me. Thank the person. “Thanks for sharing that with me.

We want to tell the person to take their suggestion and stick it straight in the shredder. Do not pass go, do not collect $200. Read Acts 7:51-53 5. Pray about it and try to correct the problem. Does God ever call his people to account? Read Proverbs 25:11-12 And it’s just as hard to accept chastisement from God as it is from a fellow person. Here’s some tips for accepting feedback: 1. Look at the person. Don’t use negative facial expressions.—don’t scowl or get angry. Remember, they are trying to help.

2. Stay calm and quiet while the person is talking. Resist the urge to defend yourself. No, I don’t want to hear it. Resist the urge.

What if I don’t feel I need to change what they said? I’m so glad you asked. There may be times when you don’t believe you need to stop (or start) doing something that your partner has recommended. First, try to work it out. Have a rational, scripture-based conversation about what is right or wrong in the situation. If you can’t agree, then involve an impartial third party—youth pastor, adult sponsor, teacher, etc...and agree to abide by his/her answer. When was the last time someone gave you feedback? How did you respond? How could you have done better? How could you have done better?

Find a friend and practice this skill. Then come online and tell us how it went.

January 20, 2009

For me, forgiveness and compassion are always linked: how do we hold people accountable for wrongdoing and yet at the same time remain in touch with their humanity enough to believe in their capacity to be transformed? -Bell Hooks