Solvent Magazine Issue #7

Contents

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... a division of Mudshark Media Inc.

pg. 4 - King of the North: Not About to Cross the Road

Publisher/Editor: Tony Loeffen Writers:

pg. 6 - About the Filmmakers: a discussion with Mike Humble and Kevin Hoffman

pg 6

Cyndi Mayhew Lester B Ideabong Tony Loeffen

pg. 14

Ideabong Illustration:

pg. 8. - The Riding of the Bull: a photo essay from the Country Club.

pg 10

Tyler Roy

pg 10. Sara E. Mayhew: Northern Mangake. by Cyndi Mayhew

Photography: pg. 24

Tony Loeffen\\

pg 12. Ideabong: Quality Advice from the Sagest of Bongs.

Site Design: Sterling Campbell

pg 12 when we are wrong ... please inform us, and send photo submissions, articles, editorials, to [email protected] keep us posted about your upcoming events [email protected]

business reviews

pg 14. The Man With No Name: A Teacher of Difficult Lessons.

pg 8 events listings

editorials take-out menus

www.solventmagazine.com local news free classifieds

updated daily... 03

From the archives...

King of the North: Not About to Cross the Road... SAB has spent his career living the rock ‘n roll dream and bringing that dream to pretty much every community in the North. A big part of his massive appeal in remote areas is his ability to share the dream with people who have to wake up and go to work in the morning. After over 20 years of allowing people to vicariously live the rock and roll lifestyle through him, SAB is now living the nightmare. Cancer has got to be top 5 on everyone’s list of worst fears, and SAB has been diagnosed with it. Unbeknownst to SAB, a benefit show was organized for him, to raise funds to help ease the financial burden that sickness brings. If the measure of a man is how many people show up to his benefit concert then SAB is truly a giant. Most people thought SAB would show up, not understanding that he really didn’t know it was happening. Lester B and I caught up with SAB before a show at the Voyager this past winter, and were eager to discuss recent developments in his life and career. SAB: Benefits are sometimes for people that are dying or dead, and that’s not me, I want to be really clear about that. It was a very nice gesture though, and I’m glad that they did it,…and I thank everyone who showed up for it. It reminded me how lucky I am. Tony Loeffen: What gets people through difficult times is their spirit, and a person’s spirit is energized by the friendships that one has. At your benefit, there was a lot of love in that room. SAB: When you get frustrated by things, you tend to take it out on the people you love. And when they’re there for you, it reminds you that you have people that you love. Lester B: Maybe it isn’t that you are taking it out on the people that you love, but that you are more likely to express your frustrations and feelings to the people that you love.

it makes me smile, so I get as much back as I give out. There is this autistic gentleman named Carl Jr. who comes out to my place and he gets up and sings with me and stuff, and one time he called me up and he asked me: “How are you doing SAB?”, and I said, “I’m having a rough day today Carl, I’m a little tired.” He said to me: “Close your eyes, it will make you feel better.” And then he said: “Are your eyes closed now?” and I said “Yes”. Then he said, “Are you feeling better?” You know what I mean? I felt better because someone wanted me to. This is what my friends do for me. Life ain’t that bad. I’m alive, I’m laughing, I can’t ask for anything more than that. I even have a beautiful wife and two beautiful daughters. This is just a chapter in the book; a small one. I don’t get preoccupied by the disease. TL: If you stop living because of it, that’s how the disease wins.

SAB: Sometimes I feel like, “What the F***?” But I try not to ask why, I’ve never believed in it. I have to play from a chair sometimes, and I rock from that chair, even when I am too tired to stand.

SAB: That’s not going to happen. I’m going to die at 97 years old, while banging the old lady. She’s going to roll over with a smile on her face and say: “It’s the dope that killed him”.

TL: Is it hard to get yourself into the mindset to entertain? Putting out as much energy as you do, for other people, when you barely have enough for yourself …

Lester B: You’re just starting to live.

SAB: I’ve been doing this for so long, it is part of my subconscious, so I’m never really off. It’s fun when you see the lads, and the people out, I know it’s time to give it. If I make somebody have a good time or smile,

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SAB: Damn right, I’m even keeping all my hair through this. Some people’s hair falls off. I don’t give a f*** about my hair, but I’m hoping that my gut falls off. A little while ago, I won at the Peterborough Music Awards, guitarist of the year, and entertainer of the year. And I got a new album that’s dedicated to all my friends and family and fans

in Northern Ontario, and the Ottawa Valley. The record company guy said to me, “What about the rest of the places”. I said, “What do you mean?” This is where I’m from. I’m a Northerner. I’ve got 4 foot snow banks at the end of my driveway, and so does everybody I know. TL: You’re living in Pembroke, but you’re still from North Bay right? SAB: I’m from the North. I’m proud to be from the North. Once when I was playing with Ronnie Hawkins, and we were in Oakville, and Glass Tiger and all these people were there, a lot of Canadian talent. Ronnie kept calling me the King of the North, and one guy laughed about it, and I thought Billy Bob was going to knock him out. Ronnie went up to the guy, right in face and said: “Well boy, what are you King of?” TL: That’s how you got the name King of the North? SAB: Ronnie Hawkins hung that one on me. I always use a hockey analogy when I describe my career. I think of it as playing in the AHL. I don’t even want to be in the NHL. In the AHL, I can score 2 goals every night for as long as I want. In the NHL, I would sit on the bench for a season, and then it will be all over. I’m staying in my league. I can support my family by playing guitar and entertaining people. I can rock until they take me across the road... in about 50 years...

Next: expecting great summer news, we catch up with SAB...

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... about the filmmakers

The first part of starting a second project is reflecting on the first. I was priveleged to catch Mike Humble and Kevin Hoffman while they were doing just that at Cecil’s. “About the Girl” has enjoyed substantial success, including a victory for Best Cinematograpy for Ed Regan at the 2009 Northern Ontario Music and Film Awards. The team looks to build on that success with another project to begin soon. Tony Loeffen: So how did you guys decide to work together? Kevin Hoffman: We work at the same place, Clark Communications, where I’m the art director, and Mike is the writer. TL: How did this project get started? The script came from you right Mike? Mike Humble: Ya, but we decided to do a film before I had the script written. KH: The reason that it really came about is this freelance photographer who does some work with us, Eddie Regan, got a video camera, and shot a commercial for us. It looked great and we were all jacked, so we got thinking …

audience that may not read. MH: I think that Herzog fans are probably a very literate bunch on average. The process of writing for the screen is very different. I find that when I go back and read, the dialogue parts seem so phony. It looks fine on the page, but when you read it out loud, it’s no good at all. I had that initial challenge of adjusting my style so that dialogue could be delivered naturally and sounds like something someone would actually say, instead of sounding like pre-meditated speech. TL: Ya exactly, I was wondering about that. Jeremy Cormier’s character called your character a “pedantic stoic” in the film, and I was wondering if he would have called you that in real life.

MH: … and I had a bunch of ideas for scripts already, so I said I would put something together. Suddenly, we were making a film.

MH: There was some back and forth about that line for sure, but we decided to leave it in.

TL: How long have you been writing for?

TL: I think it worked. It was definitely memorable. That must mean it had something going for it.

MH: I’ve been writing for ages; I always have about 12 things on the go. TL: Have you always written for the screen? MH: I started with novels, but it’s one of those things… you have a limited amount of time, and it is hard to put aside enough time to finish something like that. I was thinking to write a feature, but these guys wanted to start with a smaller project. We decided to do a short to get our techniques down, and then move to something bigger. TL: I guess it is handy to not only write books, but to write for the screen as well, because it reaches a different audience. My favorite director, Werner Herzog said that “Film is not the art of scholars, it is the art of illiterates”. What I’m thinking he meant is that a filmmaker can write and reach an

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MH: It even made the trailer. There was a 30 second trailer for the film festival we put it in, and that passage made it in there. We thought that Jeremy’s character considered himself to be smarter than his buddies, and liked big words, so it was a fit. TL: Was there anything personal in that story for you? MH: A little … everything I write is personal obviously. The story is more about breaking up with somebody as opposed to them dying …

happened to a relationship. Any break up, even if it is instigated by you, can be confusing. So, I spun the break up into a bigger scenario,… TL: Your main character’s voyage of self-discovery runs parallel to his investigation into the cause of his ex-girlfriend’s death. MH: The character that I play has given up on everything and spends his nights in the seediest bar in town where he won’t know anyone. TL: He’s trying to figure out if he’s still “that guy”. MH: Ya, and his buddy, played by Mike Howard, starts getting worried, seeing him slip further and further. He calls the other friend, know that he could function as a catalyst to snap him out of it. In order to get past the event, he has to understand it. So the investigation begins. TL: You never show the girl’s face and you don’t divulge much information about her. Is that so that the audience can superimpose their lost love on that character thereby allowing them to relate to the story even more? MH: That was the jist of it for sure… KH: Her identity is irrelevant. MH: Even the title reflects that fact. “About the Girl” specifically preserves that ambiguity. One woman came to me and said that she had lost someone several years ago…

TL: It dealt with the concept of loss.

TL: No doubt that there are people coming up to you and telling you their similar stories, because loss is universal.

MH: It considered what lengths someone would go to in order to understand what

MH: The woman I referred to said this film really touched a nerve and captured a lot of

her feelings of uncertainty and made her ask the “big why” question. KH: One of the other questions that women are asking after seeing this is “why does Mike look so hot on screen?” MH: It’s because I’m acting hot.

TL: Any of you guys have a history in acting? MH: Jeremy has done some stage and a little film. He’s actually in “That Beautiful Somewhere”. Tracy Richardson has done a lot of stage, but aside from that, it was the first time for everyone.

TL: Talking about acting, it must have been quite a stretch for Adam Orszt to play a ginormous intimidating dude.

TL: Did you guys find that there was an existing community of film makers locally that you could interact with, or anyone whose expertise you could draw on?

MH: He’s still pissed off about his credit; “The Big Guy”. He thought we might come up with something better than that.

MH: I didn’t realize until after the fact that there is a lot of stuff going on in North Bay. Short films and other projects getting done by a pretty diverse group of people.

KH: I had some relatives who saw it and came up, and we went to the George. They couldn’t believe it when they saw him. They thought he was even bigger in person than he is on the screen. TL: Ya, most people that don’t know Adam would assume that you must have been using some kind of special effects to make him that big. So, for the record, there aren’t any special effects involved with the size of “The Big Guy”? MH: Nope. KH: He really is a big guy. MH: The other thing with the script because it was just sort of an exercise to see what we could do, we wrote most of the characters to who we already knew were going to play them. TL: Good idea. You tailored the script to the actors that you knew you had available. MH: Exactly, I wrote the character of Howard for Mike Howard, who is exactly that character in real life. The quiet guy, who is everybody’s best buddy, who’s always there for you, steadfast and true. With him, it was easy. MH: Actually, the biggest stretch was my character, because I am a lot more easy going, and happy-go-lucky in real life than my character. It was difficult for me to get to that place, with Jeremy Cormier and Mike joking around on the shoots.

TL: Actually, the gentleman sitting two booths away won North Bay Film Festival’s short film competition before. Andy Williamson is his name. Film community is all over the place here. Kevin, in terms of your role, you have Eddie doing cinematography and Mike is the writer, how did you carve out an area for your vision between those two? KH: Mike and I talked a lot about who these characters were, how the story was going to work. So, I had input at that level. Plus, I am a very visual person, as a painter and an illustrator, so I was able to work with Eddie really well to select angles and compositions, etc. It was a very collaborative project. My role over-lapped their roles, so I was almost a liason making it all fit together. TL: You guys put a lot of love into scouting locations. MH: We used a lot of places that I used to hang out in high school. That whole under the bridge scene. TL: Where is that bridge? MH: It’s down Main West by the reserve. TL: My personal favorite location was in the alley way beside The Frame Maker, where those two graffiti pieces painted by Mike Olah and Andrew Raftis. You got some of the best public art in North Bay into your film. Perhaps the only sanctioned graffiti in North Bay courtesy of Michelle Trudeau. It was nice to see places like Omer’s, the parking garage, the government dock.

MH: We lucked out with The Sands as well. We needed a scummy bar, so we weren’t exactly going to be able to use Leo’s… TL: That was the Library Lounge? KH: We got in there about 3 weeks before it closed once and for all. You should have seen how difficult it was to keep the completely wasted people there quiet while we shot scenes. TL: The commercial viability of short films is limited at best, so this is more about getting your name out I suppose. MH: This was an exercise in creativity. KH: We learned so much by doing this… TL: Worst case scenario is that you have developed skills that you can bring back into your careers. Multi-media and marketing go hand in hand. KH: I’ve got a directing credit and I learned how to edit video. This is very useful to me. TL: Are you doing festivals with this film? MH: We’re in the National Screen Institute of Canada Festival. We’ve also submitted to the Northern Ontario Film and Music Awards. TL: Are you planning to do another one? MH: Well, I’ve been writing scripts and Eddie has been investing in technology … and you know, like I was saying about the novels, they’re a lot of work, and they were going nowhere for the most part, so this is has really rekindled my passion for writing. TL: As a writer, you have limited opportunities to collaborate. When you write for the screen you have a sense of immediacy. MH: There’s that, and it’s not just about me anymore, there are other people involved, so that kept me going. KH: It was an ambitious project for us, given our experience, so getting it done was an incredible feeling. We’ll definitely doing another one soon.

THE RIDING OF THE BULL North Bay’s bravest partygoers test their skills against a mechanical beast, the likes of which are are rarely seen round these parts...

Hosted by Jeremy Vega

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SARA E. MAYHEW: NORTHERN MANGAKA Literally translated, Manga means “whimsical pictures”. Originating from an explosion of artistic creativity following the period of the US occupation of Japan, Manga is strongly shaped by Western culture. In Japan, these comics are widely read by people of all ages. Manga has also gained immense popularity here in the west.

I am meeting with Northern Ontario’s Mangaka extraordinaire; Ms. Sara E Mayhew, to speak about her upcoming Japanese graphic novel “Legend of The Ztarr”. I stepped into Sara’s “office”, which doubles as her bedroom. She is propped up on her bed, eyes glued intently to her computer screen, digitally coloring her artwork. This is where the internationally recognized Manga artist conjures up her intricate tales of Superheroine love affairs and other-worldly battles of good vs. evil. Mayhew has sold close to a thousand copies of her first novel, which is now being sold at Chapters, Amazon, as well as numerous bookstores across the north. Not bad for a twenty-four year old self-published author. Mayhew receives invitations to attend industry conventions all across the U.S and Canada. Sara is influenced by such sci-fi classics as Star Trek and Star Wars. She doesn’t look like your typical Trekkie, however. She’s petite; dressed in a long, ultra-feminine blouse over skinny jeans, a tiny jeweled barrette adorning her short sheek ‘do. This reflects her style of writing; a more feminine approach to comic books. Mayhew’s brand of

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modern ‘Shōj’o Manga is replete with action and romance. Love is major theme; set into emotionally intense narratives of self-realization. Manga’s tendency to have female lead characters, with romantic plotlines appeals to woman readers, who typically elude the comic book market. “Manga relies a lot more on symbolism than traditional western comics.” Mayhew explains. “American comic books tend to be more literal in their storytelling. In Manga, a character can burst into flames and the reader understands that he or she is only figuratively bursting into flames. It means they’re angry or passionate.” Despite her lack of desk or any sort of professional workspace, Sara successfully operates a studio as a professional illustrator, specializing in creating manga artwork for individual clients and publishing companies. ‘Ztarr Manga Studios’ already boasts an impressive array of clients. She has illustrated for Canadian educational publishers Scholastic, as well as for Owl Kid’s ChickaDEE Magazine. She also does work for individual clients across the U.S.

In 2005, Sara used her $5000 US prize from the International Manga and Anime Festival to self-publish her first graphic novel, Secrets of Sorcerers. Last year Sara was awarded another generous grant, this time from the Ontario Arts Council. Grants such as these have enable Sara to afford the costly printing process of being a self-publishing novelist. “My plans

are to put together a proposal and pitch it to Manga publishers, rather than continuing the indie route. Things have changed and there are options now that weren’t open before in the industry.”

These days Sara is writing her second novel, Legend of the Ztarr, which revolves around a young orphaned girl and her fateful crusade to destroy the galaxy’s evil emperor. Although her work is geared towards young woman, Sara’s mastery of witty dialogue and ability to create endearing characters is enough to engage readers of all ages. Sara’s novels are also available in web comic format at www.ztarr.net, which draw a large worldwide fan following. Recently, a rather extraordinary opportunity has bestowed itself upon the promising young artist. Sara has been invited to attend the annual Technology Entertainment and Design (or TED) conference held in Long Beach, CA. TED gathers the world’s leading thinkers and doers to share information on varied subjects, with the goal to engage and inspire. It is not an easy ticket to acquire. The conference is ‘invites only’, sold out a year in advance. Twenty free tickets were given to “...people of exceptional talent or achievement able to demonstrate an exceptional value to the TED community”, who were unable to pay the pricey $6000 US fee. Sara’s passion for art is equaled only by her fascination with science. She will be flown to L.A for a week courtesy of TED, to mingle

with the world’s top scientists and innovators, authors and artists of today. Past speakers have included theoretical physicist Stephen Hawking, primatologist Jane Goodall, author Richard Dawkins, to Designer Isaac Mizrahi and former president Bill Clinton. “I love reading about science and I’ve really come to understand that science isn’t something separate from our day to day lives—science is a way of thinking and a way of viewing our world with complete honesty. I’d like to make stories that inspire a passion for science and learning.” Being the only Canadian invited to the prestigious conference is quite the honor. TED will be a valued opportunity for Sara to meet others in the arts and design industries. With a natural propensity for artistic creation and much dedication to her craft, Sara has managed to build herself a promising career, doing what she loves, while remaining in her small Northern Ontario community.

By Cindi Mayhew ...next month a critical analysis of Locavism.

Sara Mayhew at TED

... stay tuned to what’s happening in the Bay with Solvent Magazine Events Listings at

www.solventmagazine.com

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Kimberly asks: Which path should I take next?

Amy asks: What is the best country in the world to live in, and why?

Ideabong says: Take the long and perilous path. The one with an unknown destination and fraught with danger. The other paths will be so full of sheeple, that you will never get anywhere.

Ideabong says: If you like starvation, violence and dirt, then Sudan is the best country in the world. If you like it when China extracts your country’s oil resources and America uses your country as a pawn in its low intensity propaganda war against China, then Sudan is where you want to pitch your tent. If you enjoy a country in which there is explosive population growth amidst a myriad of problems, most of which are caused by over-population, then the Sudanese national anthem plays on repeat in your heart. Otherwise, it is Canada. Canada totally rocks.

Mala asks: Why must we ache? Ideabong says: Alas, Mala, we must ache because our awareness of our capacity to ache is very painful

Julie asks: Will I fly this summer? Ideabong says: Look at your beautiful wings Julie, and you tell the Ideabong why you wouldn’t be flying this summer.

Willy asks: Is Kelly really a man? Ideabong says: Kelly is whatever Kelly says he or she is. Ideabong got totally obliterated in a debate with a femi-nazi last week about whether or not society should be able to dictate gender identity to a sovereign individual. Learn from my mistakes, and don’t ever get stuck in the same room as a femi-nazi.

Joejobs asks: Is Ninja Vs. Pirate the greatest band ever? Ideabong says: No. But Ninja vs Pirate is the greatest band south of Sturgeon Falls and North of Sundridge.

Lydia asks: Will I find true love? Ideabong says: only if you stop looking for it. By definition, the act of searching, places that which is sought outside of one’s grasp. Let true love find you Lydia.

Big Chief asks: Who is John Galt? Ideabong says: John Galt is the symbol of all the hatred that objectivists have for themselves and for everyone else in the world. John Galt is also the symbol of all the hatred that Ideabong has for Ayn Rand, and objectivism in general. Congratulations Big Chief, you have uttered the single most annoying question in the history of literature.

Johnny asks: Is it really such a good idea to go to Hawaii? Suzanne asks: Should I keep dating a guy I just met, even though he is moving away in two months? Ideabong says: relationships can be emotional, and they can be strategic, and they can be any combination of the two. In order to make this decision, you need to determine whether it will be made based on emotional considerations or strategic ones. If your emotions are to guide you, then yes, you should continue to date the guy. Obviously you like him. If your decision is strategic, the answer is still yes. Why would you ever pass up the opportunity to keep a far away dude on the hook while you scout the home front for someone more suitable? So, Ideabong emphatically says: “YES”.

Norman asks: What do you think the outcome of 2012 will be? Ideabong says: I think in the aftermath of Dec 21, 2012, a giant amongst men will rise out of the ashes of civilization. His name will be Norman. He will bring peace and prosperity to his numerous followers. Charles asks: Will I ever get the girl? Ideabong says: if by “getting” the girl, you mean that “possessing” the girl is your objective, then, no. Always remember: that which you seek to possess will, in fact, possess you. You might, however, be possessed by the girl. Is that suitable to you?

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Ideabong says: if you really like Hawaii, and are unable to make it come to you, going to Hawaii, is not only a good idea, it is the only idea.

Cottrell asks: Why am I so gay? Ideabong says: because you are too fabulous to not be gay. It takes all the colours of the rainbow to make the sky pretty after a summer rainfall. Don’t ask why, just dig it.

Suzanne asks: Will Peter and I ever get back together? Ideabong says: that’s funny, Ideabong was just asked if Suzanne still has space in her heart for her humble servant Peter. If this is the same Peter, and you are the same Suzanne, then Ideabong suspects that the coals or romance yet smolder under the ashes of shit gone wrong. Give him a call Suze, you only live once.

Laps Berry asks: Why do hotdogs come in packages of 10, but hotdog buns come in packages of 8? Ideabong says: because for every 4 hotdogs you eat, you should sacrifice one to the gods, and the gods hate buns.

Jordan asks: Why does Googley send this dumb shit to me? Ideabong says: Googley understands that everything is defined by its opposite. Googley sends you dumb shit to teach you what smart shit is. It appears that, since are able to identify that which Googley has sent you as being dumb, you must be able to make the distinction now, so Googley has succeeded. You should thank Googley.

Jory asks: I went for a lunch date with the old friend that I’m interested in. We had a great afternoon. What do I do now? Ideabong says: don’t put pressure on the situation. You had a great time having lunch. That implies that you enjoy each other’s company, it does not imply anything beyond that. But then again, you were there ... you saw the presence or absence of twinkling stars in the eyes of the other party in this exchange. You probably already know the answer. Look within, and follow your heart.

Martina asks: Should I cheat on my husband? Ideabong says: If, when you gaze upon your husband, you aren’t getting butterflies in your tummy anymore, grab a set of water-wings and jump overboard, because the boat that is your marriage is sinking. Having extricated yourself from that needless entanglement, swim to the shores of the jungle of love, grab your net, and go on the hunt for new butterflies.

Norb asks: Given that in our known reality, everything comes from something else and time is the only constant, how does this work in relation to the beginning of the universe? Did time have to start? Does time exist at all? What caused the universe to be in the first place? If time is a constant what happened before the universe? If you believe in god, where did god come from? Really it isn’t possible for everything to come from something and for time to be a constant. One must be false. Which is it? Ideabong says: given that in our known universe everything comes from energy, and time is relative (see Einstein’s general theory of relativity), it, being time, does not work in relation to the beginning of the universe, as relativity breaks down in the presence of singularities (see Stephen Hawking’s theorems regarding singularities in the framework of general relativity). Next, to answer your further questions. Time does exist, but did not have to start and it does not have to end. Time is absolutely not a constant. The universe started in what is called a “Big Bang”. If you believe in god, god comes from within your head. You are correct that it isn’t possible for everything to come from something else, and for time to be a constant. You are incorrect that (only) one must be false. Both of your assumptions are, in fact, false. Start from scratch Grasshopper. Norb replies: It seems I greatly underestimated the power of the Ideabong. I was merely trying to stump a pothead from Cornwall but in the process I stumped myself. Since sending you the last question I have done quite a bit of research on the subject and I agree with your statements that you have now stated. However, the new information has only caused more questions, none of which could be answered by anyone, whether bong or pothead. Ideabong says: thanks for your kind words Norb, however, this bong can answer ANY question, so bring it on…

... you ask the ideabong a question ... the ideabong smokes ... the ideabong thinks ... the ideabong answers your question

www.ideabong.com

THE MAN

The universe is full of teachers and messen-

gers. They come in many forms, and if you aren’t paying attention, you might miss them. We got one in the Solvent office recently, but this was not the kind you can really miss. This was a teacher, and the lesson was in the value of extreme doubt. I always knew that doubt was healthy, but extreme doubt that shreds the fabric of your reality and casts you adrift, in isolation, forever trapped in your own mind, was never something I considered to be very helpful. Thankfully, when the lesson is doubt, you can learn the lesson, while using it, to completely discard it. My teacher entered the office unannounced, held up a fiver, and as most excellent teachers do, started asking really tough questions... Man With No Name: Who does this represent? Solvent: Wilfred Laurier MWNN: You’re wrong. S: Well who is it? MWNN: I don’t know, he doesn’t have a name. What does that say? S: Canada. MWNN: You’re wrong on that too. Look, here’s the mint in Ottawa. Now, back when they built the mint, nobody had a name, ever did have a name, and the reason was, that’s the reason why, this is a phony five dollar bill. Because nobody had a name, and this is not a world. I don’t know what you call it, but it’s not a world. S: Not a world eh? Do you think we are imagining ourselves being here, or is someone else imagining us here? MWNN: I don’t know. S: I think I’m imagining it. I’m sure of it in fact. What is the context in which I am imagining this? Can I imagine this world without ever having been in it? MWNN: It’s not a world. I don’t know what you call it. That’s what I’m saying… because when this bill was printed, there was a government that wasn’t elected. Nobody in parliament was elected. How could people vote when they didn’t have names? S: OK, in a nutshell, the problem that you are describing is the fact that the world does not exist. Right? MWNN: That’s right. S: OK, what’s the solution to that problem? MWNN: I don’t know. S: Are you working on it? MWNN: Of course. S: Good. By the way, what is your name? MWNN: Haven’t got one. S: What’s the use of a name, when you don’t have a world eh? MWNN: Now you’re catching on.

Unsuspecting Mormons stumble into the Solvent office and ... assume the missionary position.

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